Unconditional
by here4rizzles
Summary: Jane and Maura becoming parents. Fluff happens.
1. Chapter 1

_A/N This is something that came up in my head and I decided to upload it. I think I'll turn it into another adoption fic. Let me know what you think and if you would like to read more chapters!_

Chapter 1

"C'mon, Jane! It's Thanksgiving! You gotta tell us what you're grateful for." Angela pointed her fork at her daughter opposite her.

Jane groaned and threw her head back, not feeling like discussing her feelings at all. "C'mon, Ma."

"She's right, Janie." Frankie playfully hit his sister's arm and smirked.

Jane sighed. "Alright, I'm grateful for… Turkey."

Angela tilted her head and gave Jane a look she could only fear. "Jane."

"I'm… I'm grateful for Maura."

"Aww!" Tommy chuckled at his sister.

"See?" Jane pointed at her brother. "That's why we don't share feelings in this family!"

"Oh, please. I think it's sweet." Angela shook her head and smiled a sweet smile. "Of course you're thankful for your wife. I bet Maura feels the same way."

Jane turned her head to look at her wife, but she found the kitchen empty. "Where is she?"

Frankie looked at the kitchen and furrowed his brow. "I don't know, I thought she was getting dessert ready."

"I'm gonna check, excuse me." Jane got up from her chair and headed out of the room. "Maura?" She walked up the stairs, looking for her wife. When she didn't hear a reply, she opened the bedroom door and saw the blonde sitting on the edge of the bed, her head hanging low, her beautiful curls making it impossible to see her face. "Honey," Jane said softly, "are you okay?"

Maura shook her head but didn't answer.

"What happened?" Jane carefully sat down next to the doctor and tucked her hair behind her ear, furrowing her brow when she saw streaks of tears on her freckled cheeks. "Maur…"

Maura looked up at Jane with shimmering eyes, bloodshot from crying. "You know how I told you I had a stomach ache this morning?" she whispered, her voice hoarse and laced with tears.

Jane nodded. "Yeah. Is something wrong? Are you okay?"

Maura didn't reply. She just looked into Jane's eyes, her entire face dropping with pain. Jane felt concern tying a knot in her stomach. "Maura, you're scaring me."

"I-…" Maura took a deep breath and closed her eyes for a moment, fresh tears trickling down her cheeks. She looked into Jane's eyes and spoke in a soft, barely audible whisper. "I got my period."

Jane sighed deeply and felt like a heavy ball had dropped to her stomach. It didn't work. Again.

"I'm so sorry, Jane," Maura whispered. "I-… I did everything-… I…"

Jane shook her head. "Don't. It's not your fault."

"I don't know why it's not working." Maura wiped her cheeks and sighed. "I have an MD, multiple degrees in forensic pathology, I'm the Chief Medical Examiner and I have no idea why the treatment doesn't work." Her voice turned to frustration. "I've had the exams! My uterus and eggs are just fine! The sperm donors are more than fine, we've tried two different treatments and we've tried the last one three times sand it still doesn't work! We spent thousands of dollars-… Why-…" Maura looked at her wife with pain and tears in her eyes. "Why can't I have children?"

Jane sighed deeply, hating to see her wife in such pain. "I don't know, Maur," she whispered. "But it's not your fault."

Maura shook her head. "I know. I know it's not."

Jane felt tears burning in her eyes when she saw the defeat in her wife. It was like the universe turned against them, not allowing them to be parents. They wanted a child so badly. They had been trying ever since they got married over three years ago, but nothing worked.

"Maybe…" Maura whispered, her voice weak and vulnerable, "maybe we're not meant to be parents."

Jane shook her head and took Maura's hand in hers. "That's not true."

"What if this… What if this is a sign? From God… the universe… or whatever?" she furrowed her brow and stared at their hands. "What if it's a sign that I shouldn't be a mother?"

"You don't believe in God, Maur," Jane replied quietly. "Or the universe. You _should_ be a mother."

Maura looked into Jane's eyes and Jane saw an intense mix of pain and love in those big, hazel eyes. "How do you know?"

"Because…" Jane sighed and smiled at her wife. "Because I know how much love you have in your heart. Because I know how caring, sweet and how amazing you are. Because I know that the child that gets to have you as its mother, is the luckiest child in the world."

Maura smiled through her tears. "I want to be a mother," she whispered, her voice nothing more than a high-pitched whisper. "I don't know if I'll be any good at it and it scares me more than anything but I want to be a mother. I want to raise a baby with you."

"I want that too." Jane leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her wife's temple.

Maura nodded and closed her eyes as she hid her face into the crook of Jane's neck, pulling herself into the detective's side where she felt safe and loved. "It feels like my world shattered," she whispered, her breath tickling Jane's skin. "When I felt the cramps and I knew what was happening."

Jane tangled her hand in Maura's perfect curls and kissed her head. "I know."

"I'm sorry, Jane."

"Stop apologizing." Jane swallowed her tears but she felt her eyes burning. "There was nothing you can do. We-… We can try again, right?"

Maura sighed deeply and lifted her head from Jane's shoulder. "I don't know, Jane."

"We're not giving up, are we?"

"No-, no, we're not." Maura shook her head. "I just… It's exhausting, Jane." Tears trickled down her cheeks as she looked into Jane's eyes. "I don't know if I can do it again. We have the money, but… It failed so many times."

"What are you saying?" Jane asked, furrowing her brow. "That we should stop trying to become parents?"

"No." Maura shook her head and squeezed Jane's hand. "I'm saying that maybe we should try another way."

"What way? We've tried so many!"

Maura looked into Jane's eyes. "We talked about adoption. When it failed the last time."

"I know, but I told you: I don't want to make a kid our second choice. I don't want to adopt just because we can't make them ourselves. Because we failed."

"It's not a second choice." Maura shook her head and stood up from the bed, wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand. "We want to be parents, right?"

"Yeah, of course."

" _That_ is our first choice. That's what we want." Maura brushed her hair back and looked down at her wife on the bed. "I don't care how it happens. Not anymore."

Jane sighed deeply and lowered her head. "Can-… Can we just process this first?" she whispered, her voice suddenly thick with tears. "Take some time to... T-to cry?"

Maura looked at the beautiful brunette on the bed and swallowed hard as thick tears formed into those dark brown eyes. When tears fell down her wife's cheeks, Maura straddled the detective's lap and wrapped her arms tightly around the lanky woman, pulling her as close as humanly possible.

"I really thought it would work this time," Jane whispered, crying into the doctor's shoulder.

"I know. Me too." Maura sighed deeply and kissed the side of Jane's head. Just a few minutes ago, the detective refused to talk about her feelings at all. But with Maura, her defense fell completely. Maura was the only one she opened up to. Maura knew Jane felt safe with her and she would be there the catch her whenever she fell. No matter what.

"This Thanksgiving sucks," Jane mumbled against her wife.

Maura chuckled, a sound that startled both women. She covered her mouth and pulled away to look into the brunette's eyes. "I'm sorry, I… This Thanksgiving was actually quite lovely up until an while ago."

Jane smiled and squeezed Maura's sides. "Your period couldn't wait just another day, could it?"

Maura shook her head while she reached up to wipe the tears off her wife's cheeks. "Apparently not." Her smile fell and she looked into dark eyes. "I want a baby with you, Jane," she whispered. "I want to have a child with you."

Jane nodded and leaned forward to peck Maura's lips. "I want that too."

The blonde took a deep breath and leaned forward to hide her face back into the crook of Jane's neck. "We will be parents one day," she whispered. "I don't know how, or when… But we will. I have to believe that we will."

"That child will be so lucky to have you as its mother. He or she is gonna love you like crazy."

Maura smiled a sweet smile and tangled her left hand in messy curls as she used her other to pull her detective impossibly closer. They would become parents someday. How? When? They had no idea. All they knew is they wanted to have a child. A child to love, to protect, to raise and to cherish. And oh, they would love that child. They would love it more than anything or anyone in the world, more than they could ever imagine. They couldn't wait.

"Our child will love both of us," Maura whispered softly. "I think we make a good team."

Jane smirked. "We do." She pulled back and looked into sparkling hazel eyes that shimmered with leftover tears. Her heart swelled with love. "Yeah." She smiled and lovingly tucked a strand of hair behind the blonde's ear. "Rizzoli and Isles. A pretty good team."


	2. Chapter 2

_A/N Another chapter because I just couldn't resist after all your sweet reviews. Thank you all so much! I'm putting my other fics on hold for a moment because I'm crazy busy in school, but I think I'll manage to update this one. I think I will add a biological child in this story as well, just a little later. Please let me know what you think, I love suggestions and ideas for storylines!_

Chapter 2

"Alright, so this is her," Ahmed, a social worker at a local foster home, handed Jane a photo. "This picture was taken a few months ago, so she's a little bigger now."

Jane swallowed and took the photo from him. She saw a beautiful little girl looking up from the photograph, a sharp, pale face framed by blond hair that curled around her shoulders, light grey eyes looking into the lens as she smiled politely for the picture.

"She's beautiful," Maura whispered from next to her wife.

Ahmed just nodded as he opened a file. "As you know, she's three years old and her mother is from Russia. She gave birth here in Boston, so Anna is officially American."

"But her mother died, didn't she?" Maura asked, remembering the file she read a few days ago.

"Yes." Ahmed handed Maura a piece of paper from the file. "She died during childbirth, she was quite ill already. Anna was taken into foster care, and was quickly taken in by a young couple. She stayed there for a year and a half, until the couple broke up and decided to stop fostering her."

Jane sighed, unable to keep her eyes off the picture in front of her. The girl looked so innocent and sweet in the picture. She had dark, long eyelashes and her grey, almost green eyes sparkled. Her lips were a dark shade of pink, her cheeks slightly blushing above pale skin. A truly beautiful little girl. Who would ever give her up?

"At this point, we are looking for adoption." Ahmed slid a form over the table towards them. "You have a few options in general. You can start the process of fostering, which will be fast and you will have a few kids to choose from. Or, you can start the process of adopting, which will take a very long time, but you will get to choose between more children." He sighed and looked at the picture of Anna. "Anna is the third option. It will be fast, but final. Of course, you'll have a determined period to see if things work out, but Anna needs to be adopted."

"Where did she spend the past year and a half?" Maura asked while she browsed through the papers.

"Here, with some other children." Ahmed saw the worried look on Maura's face and smiled a reassuring smile. "Don't worry, it's not like you often hear about foster homes. This is actually a good place. Anna gets lots of love from the people that work here, she's had a permanent caretaker for years and she's made good friends."

Jane nodded. "What uhm… What's she like?"

Ahmed smiled a friendly smile. "She's pretty shy. Quiet. Introverted. But once you get to know her, she's cheerful and sweet. She likes to play with dolls, dress them up, do their hair and stuff. New people aren't easy for her, but with a safe environment and warm people I'm sure she will do just fine." He smiled and Jane could tell that he really knew Anna. He liked her. "She's very empathetic for a three-year old. She takes care of other kids."

"She sounds lovely," Maura said softly, a sweet smile curling her lips.

"She is. Although I should tell you that she often comes out of bed at night, doesn't like to eat her vegetables and has a habit of waking up awfully early."

Jane chuckled and shook her head. "That sounds like any normal kid." 

Ahmed shrugged. "Yeah, that's true."

"Can we-… Can we meet her?" Maura asked, fumbling with her hands. She was nervous. She usually didn't get nervous. But this was different. They had talked about it for so long. It had been months after they found out the third try to fall pregnant failed. They grieved and tried to get used to the fact that they wouldn't give birth to a baby. They looked into fostering and adopting and ultimately found Anna, thanks to Ahmed. A little girl in need of a family.

"Yeah, you can." Ahmed stood up and motioned Jane and Maura to follow him. "I think she's just woken up from her nap."

Jane felt Maura's hand grabbing hers, squeezing tightly as they followed Ahmed through the brightly painted hallways of the building. He opened a door and briefly talked to a woman before he led the women towards a smaller room next to the big playroom, telling them to wait.

Jane held her breath and squeezed Maura's hand almost too hard. She looked at her wife and saw the same nerves in the blonde. She smiled as she looked into sparkling hazel eyes. "I'm so nervous," she whispered quietly.

Maura nodded and placed a quick kiss on Jane's lips. "So am I."

"It's gonna be okay, right?" Jane asked, her voice hesitant and quiet. "We're nice people. We're good with kids."

Maura chuckled and shook her head. "I'm not. But I'm sure we're going to be just fine."

Jane was about to reply when the door opened, causing both women to snap their attention towards Ahmed. He smiled at them and led a small girl into the room.

Anna was looking up at them with wide eyes, her small shoulders pulled up to her ears as her little fingers fumbled with the hem of her slightly too large sweater. She was wearing a blue skirt, a pair of leggings and her sweater was white with a pink flower on it. Her hair was blond, long and curly, framing an expecting, insecure young face.

"Hi, Anna," Jane said softly, smiling at the girl. She carefully stepped forward and kneeled in front of Anna. "My name is Jane."

"I'm Anna," the girl answered, her voice small and a little scared.

Jane smiled. "That's a beautiful name."

Anna looked up at Maura, her small hands moving up as she sucked on her fingers. Maura smiled at the adorable sight and kneeled next to her wife. "I'm Maura, it's so nice to finally meet you."

Anna just nodded, still looking shy and a little scared. Ahmed stood next to the girl and sweetly brushed her hair back. "They wanted to meet you so badly."

"Why?" Anna looked up at the young man and furrowed her brow.

Maura knew she wasn't supposed to give Anna false hope but she couldn't help herself. "We want to see if we can take care of you," she replied with a smile. "We liked you from your picture."

Anna looked into Maura's eyes and the usually put together doctor felt tears burning in her eyes. She reached out and carefully stroked Anna's cheek with the back of her finger, smiling at the beautiful little girl. Anna showed no smile whatsoever.

"Hey," Ahmed said, looking down at her, "would you like to show Jane and Maura your dolls? So they can meet them?"

Anna nodded and lowered her fingers from her mouth. They followed the girl down the hall towards the playroom where she walked towards a corner with a small table. Jane looked up at Ahmed, unsure of what to do, but she sat down when he smiled and motioned towards the chair.

"This is Eve," Anna said softly, holding one of the dolls as if she was holding a baby. "You wanna hold her?"

Jane smiled a loving smile. "Can I?"

Anna nodded and handed Jane the doll before turning back to the small, pink doll bed. "This is Maya, she's dark baby." She handed Maura a dark-skinned doll, dressed in a pink tutu.

"She's a beautiful baby, Anna," Maura said as she took the doll in her arms.

Anna nodded, showing a proud smile as she slowly loosened up. "You wanna gives her bottle?"

Maura could only nod, indescribably happy that Anna was talking to her. She took a blue plastic bottle from the girl and pretended to feed it to the doll in her arms. She couldn't help but think about a real baby in her arms, and how much she had wanted that for such a long time. But when she looked up at Anna, she knew it didn't matter. Anna was not a baby anymore but she knew that if they decided to take her in, they would love her as their own daughter.

She didn't know what to say to Anna. She didn't know how to have a conversation with a three-year old. But Jane did, so it seemed.

"So, is it fun around here, Anna?" Jane asked as she pretended to rock the doll from side to side. "With the other kids? And Ahmed?"

Anna giggled softly, but she hid her smile immediately when she realized where she was, with new people. "Yeah."

Jane smiled at the little girl. "Yeah? Ahmed's nice to you?" She winked at the young man in front of them, eliciting a sweet smile.

Anna nodded, her small hand stroking the plastic belly of the doll in Jane's arms. "He plays wi' the dolls with me."

"He does?"

"Yah."

"That sounds like fun."

Anna nodded and looked up at Jane, but the eye contact made her uncomfortable. She turned back around and busied herself with making the small plastic bed. Jane looked at Maura and saw a sweet smile curling her wife's lips as her eyes showed a mix of concern and love.

They continued to quietly play with the dolls for a few more minutes until it was time to go. Jane and Maura handed the dolls back to Anna and Jane leaned forward on her chair to look at the little girl. "We would love to see you again soon, Anna," she said softly. "Thank you for today, we had a lot of fun."

Anna nodded, but she didn't speak. Opening up scared her and she had shut herself down again.

"We'll see you soon, Anna," Maura said with a smile. "Give the dolls a goodnight kiss from me, okay?"

Anna nodded again, fumbling with the plastic bottle in her hands. Maura carefully reached out and caressed Anna's cheek before she stood up and took Jane's hand in hers.

Anna stood in the doorway and waved at the two women as they made their way back with Ahmed. As they grabbed their coats, Ahmed stopped them before they could walk outside. "She likes you two," he said with a smile.

"Really? She's… She's so quiet." Jane furrowed her brow and zipped up her coat. "I couldn't make up anything."

"Well… She usually doesn't trust anyone with her dolls." He shrugged. "So I think that counts for something."

Maura smiled and felt her heart swelling with love. "She's lovely."

Ahmed nodded. "She is. I think she would fit with you."

"Yeah, I think so too." Jane took Maura's hand back in hers and squeezed softly.

"So uhm… We've arranged another meeting next week," Ahmed said as he opened the door towards the hallway for them. "I just…" He sighed and the women could tell he was searching for words. "Make sure you want her when you come back," he said softly. "She's been disappointed too many times."

Maura nodded and shifted closer towards her wife. "We will."

They said their polite goodbyes and stepped into the cold late winter air. Jane sighed deeply and looked at her wife, seeing her lost in thought. "You want to take a walk?" Jane asked softly. "Get some coffee somewhere?"

Maura nodded. She hooked her arm into Jane's and started walking across the sidewalk, both women thinking about the afternoon. After a few long minutes of silence, Maura sighed and gently squeezed Jane's hand. "What do you think?"

"She's amazing." Jane smiled and pulled her coat higher around her neck to get warm. "She reminds me of you."

Maura nodded. "Me too. I think I was a lot like her at that age. Quiet, introverted, a bit awkward."

"Sweet, caring, loving, smart…"

Maura smiled at her wife and shifted even closer towards the detective as they kept walking. "My mother once told me I used to play with dolls," she said quietly. "I pretended I was a mother, bathing my doll, feeding it, changing diapers… I wanted to be a mother. That was my future." Maura sighed. "Until I went to boarding school at the age of ten. The image of becoming a mother disappeared and made place for the image of a successful doctor, and later forensic scientist. My awkward character and anxiety around people only grew stronger and I never saw myself as a mother anymore."

"Maura…" Jane stopped walking and looked deeply into Maura's eyes.

Maura shook her head. "Until I met you. I still have my doubts about being a mother. But with you…" she smiled and reached up to cup Jane's cheek, "I think I can do it."

"You shouldn't have doubts, Maur," Jane said softly. "You're amazing, sweet, caring, brilliant, beautiful, loving… And your anxiety around people went out the window when you stepped into my crazy-ass family."

A sweet laugh escaped the blonde's lips as she leaned forward to wrap her arms around her wife's waist, hiding herself in a warm embrace. "You and your family did change me into a better person."

Jane shook her head. "No, we didn't. You changed, but you were already an amazing person."

Maura smiled against her detective and felt strong arms squeezing her tight. "I want to be parents with you, Jane," she whispered into the crook of Jane's neck. "I know you are an amazing mother."

"I'm not a mother yet."

Maura pulled back and looked into Jane's eyes. "Not yet."

Jane smiled and pressed her lips against Maura's forehead. "I want to give a home to Anna," she whispered. "I want to be her mother."

Maura cupped her wife's face to place a quick kiss on her lips "Me too."


	3. Chapter 3

_A/N Thank you all for the lovely reviews! It means a lot to me. This story has a quicker pace than my other stories, so we're jumping right to adoption with this chapter. This chapter is mostly Anna, the next will have more Rizzles. Thank you for telling me your thoughts and please let me know what you think of this chapter!_

Chapter 3

"Do you have everything?" Jane smiled down at Anna while she carried her small suitcase, finally ready to take the little girl home. They waited so long and they were beyond excited for today.

Anna clutched a teddy bear to her chest and nodded. "Yeah."

Maura smiled at her wife and squeezed her hand, her other hand holding Anna's bag with the dolls and their accessories. They had been looking forward to this day for months. The more they visited Anna, the more they grew fond of the little girl. She was shy, introverted and quiet but the two women loved her. Today was finally the day they got to bring her home with them. Jane and Maura both took two weeks off work to be with Anna, help her get settled in the house and in the family.

"Well, time to say goodbye." Ahmed smiled and kneeled down in front of Anna.

"'S you never gonna see me again?" Anna asked, her voice fragile and soft.

Ahmed smiled and Jane thought she saw a hint of a shimmer in his eyes. "I sure hope not. You can come visit any time you like."

Anna nodded and wrapped her small arms around Ahmed's neck, still holding the bear in her left hand. Ahmed's muscular arms pulled the girl close and he placed a kiss on the side of her head. "I'll miss you, bug."

"I's gonna miss you too."

Jane smiled at the sweet interaction. They broke the embrace and Anna turned to look up at the women, anxiety and expectation showing in her beautiful grey eyes. "You ready?"

Anna nodded and averted her gaze. "Yeah."

"They're gonna love you like crazy, Anna." Ahmed smiled and caressed Anna's blond hair. "I know it."

Maura nodded and smiled at Ahmed. "We will." She reached out her hand towards Anna and the girl hesitantly took it.

"Thank you for everything." Jane shook Ahmed's hand. "We'll see you soon."

He smiled and watched as Maura and Anna left the building. "I really am going to miss her." He shrugged and sighed deeply. "But she's in good hands."

"She is." Jane squeezed Ahmed's arm and said her goodbyes before following her wife and soon-to-be daughter outside. They put Anna's stuff in the back and Jane watched Maura helping the little girl in her new car seat.

The drive home was silent. Anna snuggled the bear's ear to her nose as she sucked her thumb into her mouth, looking out of the window the entire way. When they arrived home, Anna's thumb fell out of her mouth as she looked at the large house with awe.

"Well, this is it." Jane smiled and turned off the engine, turning to look at Anna in the backseat.

Anna opened her mouth but stayed silent. She only nodded.

"Let's go." Jane smiled at Maura and opened her door, getting Anna's stuff out of the back while Maura helped the girl out of the backseat. They walked through the cold winter air towards the front door, opening it to be welcomed by the warm glow of home.

"This is your new home, Anna," Maura said softly, smiling down at Anna.

The girl looked nervously around the room, still sucking on her thumb, clutching her bear to her chest. She allowed Jane to take off her coat but immediately turned back into her original position. Maura smiled a nervous smile at her wife. Jane smiled back and reached out to gently squeeze the doctor's arm, a movement of love and comfort.

Maura took off her coat and kneeled in front of Anna. "Would you like to see your room?"

Anna nodded. She didn't say anything but took Jane's hand as she gently led the three of them upstairs towards the newly decorated girls room. "We didn't know what color you'd like, so I hope you like it." Jane opened the door, revealing a sweet room with light blue walls, the wall behind the single bed painted white with flowers. The room was still quite empty.

Jane kneeled next to Anna and looked at the little girl, smiling when she saw those beautiful grey eyes looking around the room. "We kept it a little empty so there's still room for your dolls and their stuff," she said softly. She carefully reached out to tuck a strand of hair behind Anna's ear and was happy to see the girl accepting it. "Do you like it?"

"Yeah." Anna's voice was soft and hesitant, but Jane saw a sparkle in her young eyes, her lips curling up into a shy smile.

They stayed silent for a while, both women unsure of what to do. They wanted to make Anna feel at home, but at the same time they were afraid to overwhelm her and go too fast. Maura sighed and nervously adjusted her skirt. "Would you like something to drink, honey?"

Anna nodded.

"Okay." Maura smiled and gently took the girl's hand to lead her back downstairs. She grabbed a cup and poured some apple juice, handing the cup to Anna while Jane started to unpack Anna's dolls so she could play with them.

Anna seemed happy to have something familiar within reach, and she immediately took off to set up the beds and clothes for her dolls on the floor in front of the fireplace.

"It's gonna be okay, Maur," Jane whispered, slowly walking up to her wife who was fidgeting with her hands. "She just needs to adjust."

"I know." Maura sighed deeply and nodded, smiling a small smile. "I just feel her nerves. It makes me nervous as well." She chuckled softly and shook her head. "I hope she comes out of her shell soon."

"Yeah." Jane nodded and wrapped her arm around Maura's waist as she kissed her wife's temple. "I can't wait for that to happen."

Maura smiled a loving smile, looking into those dark eyes she loved so much. She was about to tell the brunette how much she loved her when she felt a soft tug on her skirt. She turned and saw Anna looking up at her with big eyes that showed a hint of fear, holding her cup with juice in her hands. "What is it, honey?" Maura asked, as Anna stayed silent.

Anna lifted one of her shoulders and her bottom lip quivered, causing Maura's heart to break for the girl. She didn't know what to do and was grateful to see her wife kneeling down and gently caressing Anna's pale cheek. "What is it?" Jane asked softly.

"I-… I don't likes apple…" Her eyes filled with tears as if she just said the most horrible thing in the world.

Jane swallowed hard and smiled a loving smile, her heart swelling with love for the shy girl in front of her. "Oh honey, you could have said so!" She chuckled and brushed Anna's hair back. "How about some lemonade?"

Anna nodded and visibly relaxed. Maura smiled at the beautiful girl while Jane got up to pour Anna lemonade. Ever since Maura got together with Jane her social skills improved, but this was different. She was about to be this girl's mother. She wanted so desperately for Anna to like her for who she was. She felt a new kind of affection for the little girl, a feeling she hadn't felt before. A feeling of protectiveness and care.

When Anna received her cup of lemonade she politely thanked Jane and headed back to her dolls to finish putting them to their little beds or getting them out after an imaginary nap.

"Anna?" Jane asked, putting the lemonade back in the fridge. "Do you like spaghetti and meatballs?"

Anna looked up from her doll and nodded.

"You can tell us if you don't," Maura said with a hopefully reassuring smile. "We can make whatever you like for dinner."

"I like spaggethis." Anna fumbled with the dress of her doll as she nodded her head.

"Okay. Spaghetti it is." Jane nodded. "I make the best spaghetti in the world."

Anna didn't reply and went back to her corner of the living room. Maura sighed deeply. The girl didn't seem uncomfortable or scared, but she was so shy. So quiet. How on earth would they get her out of her shell? Maura was absolutely sure that inside that shell, a beautiful, happy and caring little girl was hiding. She couldn't wait to meet that girl.

While Anna played in the living room, the two women started making dinner. After years of marriage, they still enjoyed a simple task like that together. Simply talking softly, stealing kisses, glances and a loving touch here and there… They loved just being together, it didn't matter what they were doing. After a few minutes, when the pasta was boiling, Jane gently squeezed Maura's arm and pointed at the living room. "Look," she whispered.

Maura looked at Anna and swallowed an immediate lump in her throat. The girl was talking softly to her dolls, her quiet voice sounding soothing and caring. "Wants some milk?" she asked softly as she cradled the dark-skinned doll to in her arms. "You's hungry? You can't have spaghettis 'cause you's a baby." She clumsily moved the doll to grab a plastic bottle from the floor before she sat down with her back to the women while she fed the doll in her arms.

"Look at her," Maura whispered, wrapping her arm around Jane's waist. "She's such a sweet girl."

Jane nodded and when Maura looked up she saw tears shimmering in her dark eyes. She chuckled and pressed a kiss to her wife's cheek. Jane groaned and shook her head to try and get rid of the tears in her eyes. "She's gonna be our girl," she whispered, looking at the blonde snuggled into her side. "Our little girl."

Maura nodded and placed her hand on Jane's cheek, gently rubbing her thumb across her sharp cheekbone. "We're going to be her mother."

"Ugh, okay I'm done." Jane rubbed the tears out of her eyes and chuckled as she kissed her wife's lips and turned back to the pasta sauce she was preparing.

Maura laughed and squeezed Jane's side, placing a kiss on her shoulder. Her badass detective would never, ever admit to her mushy side. She got back to the salad she was preparing and dinner was finished rather quickly. Jane set the table and Maura slowly walked towards the living room. "Anna, honey? Dinner is ready."

Anna nodded and put her doll in its bed before she stood up and followed Maura into the kitchen. Maura smiled and quickly smoothed the girl's hair. "Wash up first." She smiled and lifted Anna up on the small step stool they bought for the little girl and put in front of the sink so she could reach it. Maura took Anna's hands in hers and squirted some soap into them before rubbing it in and rinsing it off. She was happy to see Anna accepting the touches and her being so close behind the girl. It meant that Anna wasn't afraid of them. Maura handed her a towel to dry her hands and felt her heart swelling with love as she saw Anna smiling a shy smile at her. She gently caressed Anna's cheek for a short moment before showing her where to put the towel and guiding her towards the dinner table.

Dinner went by quickly. Anna devoured her spaghetti and meatballs but only ate a few bites of salad. Ahmed was right when saying she didn't like her vegetables. They talked quietly about random subjects, but Anna didn't answer with more than a few words. Still, those few words were a challenge, Maura knew.

After dinner, Anna was clearly tired. Her head was resting back against the chair as she was sucking on her thumb, occasionally rubbing her eyes. Maura smiled at the adorable sight.

As Jane closed the dishwasher, Maura walked towards the kitchen and touched her arm. "Should we put her to bed?"

Jane looked at Anna and nodded. "Yeah."

"Uhm… Both of us? Or… I'm not sure…" Maura rambled and shook her head. She sighed and looked at her wife. "What should we do?"

Jane chuckled at her adorable wife and placed a quick kiss on her lips. "One of us, I think. Don't want to intimidate her."

"Okay." Maura already moved away to let Jane take the girl to bed, but Jane stopped her.

"Why don't you put her to bed?" Jane whispered.

"I don't know… I wouldn't know…"

"It's not rocket science, Maur." Jane smirked that famous Rizzoli-smirk, her dark eyes sparkling.

"I think I'd prefer rocket science." Maura smiled nervously. She closed her eyes and shook her head. There was no reason to be nervous. She put herself together and took a deep breath. "Okay."

Jane chuckled and gave Maura's arm a comforting squeeze before turning to the dinner table. "Anna baby, Maura's gonna put you to bed, okay? It's getting late."

Anna lowered her thumb from her mouth and looked at the women. "Okay." She slid off her chair and hurried towards the living room to grab her teddy bear. "Can I puts the babies in bed?"

"Of course." Jane smiled a loving smile, a smile Maura loved to see on her wife. It was special and unique, a smile and a soft side she reserved for her family.

They watched Anna putting her dolls to bed, covering them in blankets and giving them kisses. Her caring nature startled Maura. It was special for a three-year old, and Maura felt herself falling for the little girl.

When she was finished, Anna grabbed her bear and looked up at Maura. "Done."

"Okay." Maura smiled and took Anna's hand in hers to lead her upstairs, but Jane stopped her.

"You going to bed without saying goodnight?" She kneeled down in front of the little girl and brushed her hair back before placing a soft kiss on her forehead. "I had a great first day with you, Anna," she whispered.

Anna just nodded shyly, eliciting a smile from Jane. "Is…" Anna started, fumbling with her bear, "Is you g-gonna be my mommies?"

Jane hesitated for a while and looked up at Maura for advice, but Maura just bit her lip, not knowing how to answer. Jane decided to be honest. "Yeah, baby. We would very much like to be your mommies."

Anna didn't seem affected by that statement at all and just nodded her head, effectively confusing the two women. But after a short second, the girl furrowed her brow and looked up at Jane. "Two mommies?" she asked, her voice quiet and hesitant. "No daddy?"

Jane shook her head, feeling herself tensing up at the question. "No," she whispered. "Just us mommies."

Anna thought about that for a moment and even though it looked like she wanted to ask more questions, she just nodded. "Okay."

"There's still time, Anna," Maura said softly. "It's a lot to get used to all in on day. Nothing is official yet. Just take it step by step, okay?"

Anna looked up at the classy woman in the kitchen without having a clue of what she meant. "Step?"

Jane chuckled. "Yeah. Y'know, she's so smart I don't even understand her sometimes." She tickled Anna's belly. "Bedtime, baby." She caressed Anna's cheek and smiled at the little girl. "Sweet dreams."

Anna put the ear of her bear back to her nose. "G'night."

Jane smiled and stood back up, watching Maura to take Anna to bed.

With Anna's small hand in hers, Maura walked upstairs and led them towards the bathroom to help the girl brush her teeth, not missing a single spot. Maura was suddenly aware of the fact that this little girl was her responsibility now. She had to make sure she was healthy, happy and strong. She had to make sure she brushed her teeth properly. That was her job now. For a short moment, that scared her. When she looked at herself in the mirror, she saw insecurity in her own hazel eyes. Was she cut out for motherhood? Could she take it? The worry? The fear? The responsibility? And most of all, would Anna accept her as her mother? But when she looked down in the mirror and met with Anna's big grey eyes, she knew it would be okay. She saw trust and admiration in those eyes that looked shyly at her. She would do anything for the girl.

She smiled and smoothed Anna's hair. "Time for pajamas."

In her new bedroom, Maura pulled Anna's sweatshirt over her head and folded it to put it in her new closet. She helped the girl out of her skirt and leggings and into her pajama pants and T-shirt, which she brought from the adoption center. She brushed Anna's ash blond hair and placed a spontaneous kiss on the top of her head, a gesture that startled herself. "Do you have your bear?" Maura asked softly.

Anna nodded and hurried towards the chair in the corner of the room to grab her bear from it. "His name's Ted."

"Oh, that's a great name." Maura smiled and moved the covers away for Anna to lie down. After the girl slid into bed, Maura caressed her cheek for a moment. "Would you like to pick a bedtime story?"

Anna's grey eyes lit up with a sweet sparkle as she nodded her head. "Yeah." 

Maura smiled at the beautiful girl and motioned towards the shelf above the bed, filled with the books she bought in the weeks before Anna came. She picked every single one with care, making sure that it would support her development, help her in her further life with reading and understanding. Anna stood up on the bed to look at the books. She thought for a while until she picked one.

"Good choice." Maura took the book from Anna and felt the girl sitting on the edge of the bed next to her, wiggling her bare feet back and forth. She opened the book and started reading the story. After one page, she had to swallow a lump in her throat when she felt Anna's head resting against her upper arm. She glanced at the girl, seeing her holding Ted's ear to her nose as she sucked her thumb in her mouth, her eyes fixated on the pictures in the book. If this was part of motherhood, Maura never wanted to stop. It was a small gesture, but it meant that Anna trusted her and felt safe in their home.

Anna listened intently to every single word Maura read to her, giggling softly at the funny parts, tensing up at the exciting parts. When the story was over, Maura closed the book and heard Anna sighing deeply, rubbing her eyes with her free hand. Without hesitation, she wrapped her arm around the little girl and placed a kiss on top of her head. "That was a good story, wasn't it?" she whispered with a sweet smile.

Anna hummed and nodded her head, seeming comfortable and relaxed against Maura's side. "With the other kids I only gots one story on Friday," she said quietly.

"Why's that?" Maura replied, trying to be careful.

Anna shrugged. "Friday's story time always. There's no story for bedtime."

"Hm, you like stories, don't you?" Maura gently caressed Anna's blond curly hair against her side.

The little girl just nodded and showed a small smile.

"Well, I promise we will always try our very best to read you a story before bedtime. Okay?"

Anna looked up at Maura with those big, grey eyes that showed almost disbelief. "Every bedtime?"

Maura smiled. She caressed Anna's cheek, startling herself at how comfortable she was in this role. "Yes. I don't know if we'll always be here because we have very busy jobs, but I promise we'll always try our best to be there for bedtime."

Anna nodded and showed the biggest smile Maura had seen since she met the girl. It was truly a beautiful smile, and Maura knew she would get in trouble in the future for not being able to resist it. She chuckled to herself and brushed Anna's hair behind her ear. "Time for bed, honey."

"'Kay." She slid under the blankets and snuggled into her pillow, holding the old Ted tightly against her chest.

"We are right down the hall if you need us," Maura said softly while she tucked Anna in. "Don't be afraid to come for us if you need to, okay?"

Anna nodded. "Okay."

Maura pressed a careful kiss to the girl's forehead before standing up from the bed and turning off the lights. "Goodnight, honey."

"'Night, new Mommy."

When Maura closed the door behind her, she rested her head back against it and felt a single tear trickling down her cheek. Mommy. She never expected it, but it suited her. She was a mommy. She had a daughter. A beautiful, smart, caring, sweet little daughter. It wasn't complicated or difficult. She was a mommy, and all she had to do was love her child. Love her for who she is, encourage her to pursue her dreams, taking care of her, protecting her from others and herself, comfort her and cherish her. And in that moment, Maura knew she could do all of that. It wouldn't be easy or without obstacles, but she could do it. She could be a mommy.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

"She called me Mommy," Maura said as she came walking into the living room, back to her wife. "She said: 'goodnight, new mommy'. All on her own."

Jane looked up from the report on her laptop and smiled at the sight of the blonde. She looked amazing. Tears on her pink cheeks, a happy smile curling her lips, her eyes sparkling like a whole galaxy.

"Wow, those are more words than she's said all night, possibly." Jane chuckled and reached out her arm to pull Maura towards her, positioning the doctor in between her legs as she reached up to cup her cheek and place a kiss on her lips.

Maura kissed her wife back before pulling back to smile. "Oh Jane, and she loves stories. She loves it so much, I haven't seen any three-year old paying that much attention to a story before. It was so special. She was so relaxed and so focused." A beaming smile lit up Maura's face as she looked at her wife, her eyes shimmering with happy tears. "And she's so beautiful, Jane," she whispered, her voice quieter. "We really do have the most beautiful daughter in the world."

Jane felt her eyes burning but swallowed her tears in attempt to stay in character. "Daughter," she whispered, her voice huskier than she expected.

Maura smiled a bright smile and seemed to be coming back to earth. "We're mommies, Jane." She cupped her wife's cheek with one had as she tangled the other in her dark curls.

"Well technically not yet…"

"Oh stop it." Maura chuckled and silenced her detective by capturing her lips in a loving kiss that lingered for a few moments and made both their heads spin. "We'll be her official mommies soon."

"So we're not sending her back?" Jane joked, showing a smug smirk. Of course, Maura didn't pick up on the joke.

"Are you out of your mind? We can't send her back! That would be-…"

"Cruel, yeah. I was kidding, Maur." She shook her head and pecked her wife's lips. "You're adorable."

Maura just shook her head and straddled Jane's lap, meanwhile slapping Jane's arm. Jane faked pain and gasped. "Maura!"

"I love you, Jane," Maura whispered, her soft giggle making place for a loving smile. "I love you so much."

"I love you more." Jane looked into the honey-blonde's big hazel eyes and wrapped her arms tighter around her soft waist.

Maura shook her head. "That's impossible." She pressed her lips against Jane's before she could come up with a clever joke, stifling it with a quiet moan as her hands wrapped around Jane's neck.

Jane moaned at the lovely taste of her wife's lips and felt her perfect curves under her silky blouse, gently roaming across the blonde's back and sides. When they broke away, both women were panting for air and looking deeply into each other's eyes. "I told you you'd be a great mom," Jane whispered against Maura's lips. "She loves you already."

"The feeling is mutual."

"Oh you fell for her big time, didn't you?" Jane smirked and squeezed Maura's sides. "With those big eyes of hers, she's gonna get you doing anything she wants."

"I can be strict with her!" Maura shifted so she was sitting sideways in Jane's lap and wrapped her arms tighter around her wife's neck. "If that is what she needs, I'll be firm."

"I know, I was kidding." Jane kissed her wife's freckled, glowing cheek and inhaled her lovely scent, faded honey, a hint of perfume and mint. "You'll be amazing."

"So will you, Jane." Maura turned her head to look at her wife and gently caressed her sharp cheekbone with her thumb. "She's comfortable enough with you to ask questions, that says a lot."

Jane nodded and pursed her lips as she thought about the question Anna asked. "Y'know," she whispered, "I used to think about that a lot. When we first got married."

"About what?"

"Well… Just… If we'd ever had kids, that kid would never have a father." Jane sighed and her lips curled into a smile without happiness as she looked down at the floor. "We'd be taking that away from our child."

"Jane…"

"When Anna asked if she wouldn't have a daddy… Scared the hell out of me. What if that made her upset?"

"It didn't."

"I know." Jane shook her head and sighed deeply. "I know that's stupid. A kid doesn't need a dad as long as it has loving parents. Male or female."

Maura nodded, looking at her wife with concern in her eyes. "Anna will have everything she needs, honey," she whispered. "A warm home, a safe place, and two mothers that will love her very much."

"Yeah. I know. Dads are overrated." Jane smirked and shook the sad feeling off her. "I mean, mine's a adulterous drunk and yours is the biggest mob boss in town. Who needs fathers?"

Maura laughed and rested her cheek against Jane's forehead. "My adoptive father is a wonderful man. And so was yours, before he left Angela."

"Yeah, okay. But after that he kind of became an asshole."

"God Jane, would you watch your language please?" Maura furrowed her brow in disapproval. "We can't have that, especially with Anna around the house."

"She's asleep!"

"Well, I suggest you practice your clean language even when she's not around." Maura kissed Jane's lips and untangled herself to stand up from her lap.

Jane rolled her eyes but her lips curled up into a smile as she looked at her wife's adorable scold. "Wanna watch a movie?"

Maura hummed and poured herself a glass of red wine. "Yes. Although can we please watch something interesting this time?"

"What do you mean?" Jane smirked as she grabbed herself a beer from the fridge. "That movie from last week was amazing!"

"Oh, please. It was all about which man could shoot the most people. I thought it was quite boring."

"Alright alright. I'll fall asleep while you watch an interesting movie, sound like a good plan?"

Maura pursed her lips and squinted her eyes at her wife before she headed towards the living room, looking over her shoulder at the brunette in the kitchen. "As long as you do it in my arms."

Jane smiled to herself, closing the fridge and taking a sip of her delicious cold beer. It would be a perfect night.

The next morning, Jane woke up from a cold draft that ran across her face. She smiled a sleepy smile as she came to her senses and felt her wife's blond curls tickling her chest as Maura's head rested in the crook of her neck, both her arms and legs wrapped around the lanky brunette. She placed a careful kiss on top of Maura's head and untangled herself from the mess of limbs, carefully stepping out of bed into the cold air of the bedroom. She shivered and pulled a sweater over her head and put some socks on her feet. Winter in Boston was never friendly.

When she walked down the hallway, she saw that Anna's bedroom door was open. She headed downstairs to look for the girl, seeing that it was still pretty early to be up on a Saturday. When she entered the living room, she saw Anna standing at the coffee table to put a different dress on one of her dolls.

Jane smiled at first but then she saw the goose bumps on Anna's pale arms, her lips almost blue as she stood in only her thin pajama pants and a T-shirt. "Good morning, baby," Jane said softly as to not to startle the girl.

Anna shot her attention towards Jane, scared at first, but then relaxing when she saw the smile on the detective's face.

Jane slowly approached Anna and caressed her blond hair. "You're freezing, honey. You should've put on some socks and a sweater."

Anna shrugged but a visible shiver ran down her spine.

"Oh yeah, peanut." Jane chuckled and carefully reached out her hands to lift the girl into her arms. She smiled when Anna accepted it and allowed her to pull her up from the floor.

Jane felt the girl shivering against her as her cold arms tucked underneath herself while she snuggled in against the woman. Jane felt tears in her eyes at the feeling of Anna's affection. She pulled the little girl close and rubbed her back. "Let's get you warm, huh baby?" she whispered into Anna's soft hair. "Did you have a good sleep?"

Anna nodded.

"How early did you wake up? Pretty early, I'll bet?"

Anna shrugged. She didn't know how to tell time yet.

Jane just hummed and pressed her lips against the side of Anna's head, loving how the little girl fit in her arms. It was a perfect match. "I'm really glad you're with us, Anna," Jane whispered quietly. "We're gonna have a great time together."

"Hm hm." Anna nodded but didn't say anything, just clutching to the warm woman that was holding her cold body.

Jane chuckled and pulled her close. "C'mon, let's get dressed." She headed upstairs and met Maura who just walked out of the bedroom, looking stunning in her satin pajamas, robe and messy hair.

She gasped and smiled a loving smile when she saw her wife holding their soon-to-be daughter in her arms. "Hello, sweethearts." She smiled as she cupped Jane's cheek and pecked her lips. "How did you sleep, Anna?"

Anna looked shyly at Maura from Jane's shoulder. "Good."

"She's pretty cold so I was just gonna get her warmed up."

Maura nodded and put her hands on Anna's freezing left foot. "Oh, honey you're freezing. Go put on some very warm socks."

"I's only have normal socks," Anna said softly.

"Well then we'll put on two on each foot." Jane smirked as Anna giggled softly and she carried the girl back into her bedroom, putting her on the floor to get out her clothes. "What do you want to wear today?"

"The pink sweater." Anna stood on her toes to point at a sweater in her closet, one that tied around her middle with a white string.

"Good choice." Jane grabbed it and pulled Anna's pajama T-shirt over her head, seeing more goose bumps rising on her chest and stomach. She quickly grabbed a clean white T-shirt, pulled it over Anna's head and helped her into the adorable sweater.

Most of the clothes Anna owned were the opposite of Jane Rizzoli. Pink, skirts, flowers… She loved it. She managed to get all of it dirty within the first minute she wore them, but she was a true girly girl. Jane secretly loved it. She grabbed a pair of jeans and helped her button them up before pulling socks over her feet as Anna sat down on the edge of the bed. She rubbed Anna's feet in her hands for a few moments, to try and get them warm. Anna giggled quietly at the gesture.

"Anna?" Maura peaked her head through the door. "Do you like pancakes?"

Anna's eyes went wide as she looked up at the woman and nodded her head.

Maura laughed. "I see. Pancakes with blueberries are coming up."

"'Kay." Anna smiled a content smile as she hopped off the bed, a movement that startled Jane. Anna moved slowly and carefully, looking like she thought about every move she made. Hopping off the bed showed that she was just a little child, like all other three-year olds. She wasn't scared or uncomfortable anymore. She was starting to feel at home.


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N Okay, this story will be filled with so much fluff…! Some angst will come up along the way but most of it will be cuddles and love. I'm so happy to hear you all like Anna, as she is a very dear character to me. I'd like to point out that English is not my native language so I appreciate it if you point out any mistakes! Thank you all for reviewing, they all make me so happy!_

Chapter 5

"Anna, this is your grandma Angela." Maura smiled at her mother-in-law as she felt Anna hiding behind her leg. She looked down at the little girl and saw her looking at Angela with big, fearful eyes, her thumb sucked into her mouth as her head rested against Maura's upper leg.

She had been with them for a week and a half, and things couldn't have gone better. Anna was slowly creeping out of her shell, reveling in her mothers' affection and loving their warm home. She called both of them 'Mommy', but Maura wasn't sure if she did it because she saw them as her mothers, of if she was told that they were. Either way, Maura loved it. Every time she heard the word 'mommy', her heart made a little jump. It would be official soon. In three days, they had a meeting with Ahmed an their lawyer to sign the papers and make Anna their official daughter. To become official mothers.

They had been careful in letting her meet the Rizzoli-family, knowing how overwhelming they could be. Frankie stopped by a few days ago so she met him already, but today it was time to meet the entire family. Maura had wanted to go slow and meet them one by one, but Jane assured her a family dinner would be fine. That way she met all of them at once and get it over with.

Maura reached down and lifted Anna up in her arms, settling the girl on her hip. Angela smiled at her. "It's so nice to finally meet you, Anna."

Anna just nodded shyly, resting her head into the crook of Maura's neck.

"I heard you're having a great time with your new mommies," Angela said with a sweet smile. "Are they being good to you?"

"Yeah." Anna's short arm wrapped around Maura's neck, her fingers tangled in perfectly styled curls. It only took her a few days to get comfortable like this. She spent the past week and a half fulltime with her new mothers, and grew quite attached. They played games, read stories, bought her dolls new clothes, bought Anna new clothes, made dinner together, drew pictures… It had been one of the best weeks of Maura's life. Getting to know Anna was a true pleasure.

Angela sensed Anna's discomfort and gently reached out to squeeze her leg before heading towards the kitchen to help with dinner.

Meeting new people scared Anna, and Maura felt the girl's uneasiness. She was the same. She shifted the girl in her arms to hug her to her front, kissing the side of Anna's head. "It'll be fine, sweetheart," she whispered.

Anna nodded against the blonde and Maura pulled the girl close. "Hmm, time to get the table ready for dinner, honey. Would you like to help me?"

"'Kay."

Maura pulled back with a smile, looking into light grey eyes. "Can you do the plates for me?" She brushed Anna's blond hair behind her ear. "You were so good at that yesterday."

Anna nodded and showed a small, proud smile. "Yeah."

"Good girl." Maura kissed the girl's cheek and watched as she hurried into the kitchen, hesitating for a moment before she tucked on Jane's slacks and pointed up at the cabinets where the plates were. Jane smiled down and handed Anna two plates, careful not to give her too much to handle.

Maura smiled at the sight and was slightly startled when she felt Angela's warm hand on her shoulder. "She's a sight, Maura," the older woman said with a smile. "Simply beautiful."

Maura looked at her mother-in-law and saw a proud sparkle in her eyes. "She is, isn't she?" Maura whispered, turning her attention back at her little girl. "She's so lovely."

She looked up and felt Angela tucking a strand of hair behind her ear, a gesture of motherly love that made Maura's heart fill with love. "Being a mother looks good on you." Angela smiled and stroked Maura's freckled cheek with the back of her fingers. "Natural."

"I-… I never expected it… But it feels natural." Maura smiled a nervous smile and looked down at her feet. "I guess my maternal side has been there all along, and I'm just now discovering it, because of her."

"She's lucky to have you both."

Maura smiled but felt nerves tingling her stomach. "I-… Yes."

"Don't you ever doubt that, Maura." Angela cupped Maura's cheek and turned her head to look at her.

Maura just nodded and was surprised to feel tears in her eyes. "I do sometimes," she whispered while she looked up at Angela. "It's only been a week and a half but I need to make sure she's happy and healthy and-… I'm not sure if I can do that! I'm not sure-… If I can-…" Maura sighed and turned away from the rest of the family to hide the tears in her eyes. "What if I can't be the mother she wants?"

"Oh, Maura." Angela wrapped a warm arm around the younger woman's shoulders as she placed a kiss on her temple. "You're going to be just fine, honey."

Maura shook her head and wiped her cheek with the back of her hand.

"Yeah, you are." Angela smiled. "I know how it feels. When Jane was born, I freaked out big time." She chuckled in her familiar, hoarse voice. "Suddenly there was this tiny person depending on me and I was absolutely sure I was going to be a huge failure."

Maura looked at her mother-in-law and smiled a sympathetic smile. "You weren't."

"Oh, I screwed up. I screwed up real bad." Angela laughed at herself and squeezed Maura's arm. "You're not going to be the bother Anna wants," she said softly, turning serious.

Maura looked up at the older woman with wide eyes. "What?"

"You're not. You're going to be the mother she _needs_." She smiled a loving smile and gently caressed Maura's cheek. "That's something else, and it's important that you remember that."

Maura just nodded, simply in awe of the sweet, caring woman she was lucky enough to call her mother-in-law. Yes, they cursed her curiosity and snooping around sometimes. But Angela would always be the mother Maura always wanted and never had. Until now.

"She's gonna scream at you. She's gonna act out, yell at you, tell you she hates you. She's going to make mistakes and you're going to let her, and that's going to hurt so bad. But Maura," Angela stepped closer towards the blonde, "she's going to love you through _all_ of it. Don't ever forget that, okay? If you're yelling at each other and you feel like you're doing everything wrong, she's gonna feel just as bad as you. And she's gonna love you no matter what."

Tears formed in Maura's eyes as she swallowed a lump in her throat. "Are you sure?" she asked, her voice hoarse and soft.

Angela nodded. "Yes. Absolutely sure." She reached out to wipe a single tear from Maura's cheek. "And you're going to love her more than you can ever imagine. Your whole world will be turned upside down because of her. She's going to take up a part of your heart and you're never, ever getting that part back. You're going to love her so much, Maura."

"I already do." Maura's voice was soft and strangled with unshed tears.

Angela smiled a bright smile and nodded her head before pulling her daughter-in-law in for a sweet hug, kissing the side of Maura's head as she squeezed her so tight Maura could barely breathe. They both chuckled as they let go and Maura wiped her cheeks.

"Oh and just so you know, Jane is going to have the same thoughts as you and she'll freak out." Angela laughed as she looked at her daughter in the kitchen. "Tell her the same things I told you, just a tip."

Maura chuckled. "I will. Thank you, Angela."

Angela pressed a kiss to her cheek and disappeared into the kitchen to help set the dinner on the table. Maura composed herself by taking a deep breath and blinking her eyes a few times to get rid of the leftover tears. She was about to get to dinner when she felt Anna standing next to her. She smiled down at the beautiful girl. "Hi, baby."

"I finishes the plates," Anna said softly.

"Good girl." Maura scooped her up in her arms and hugged her to her chest as she kissed her cheek. "I… I love you, honey."

Anna didn't reply and just wiggled herself into the warm embrace. She didn't understand the weight of those words that were said for the very first time. She didn't know how much it meant and how much it would mean for her future. All she understood was that she liked this nice lady with warm arms, high heels and perfect clothes that took care of her and read the most amazing bedtime stories.

"Dinner's ready!" Jane called from the kitchen while she walked towards her wife and Anna. "C'mon peanut. There's meatballs." She took the girl from Maura's arms and swung her through the air before kissing her cheek, eliciting a sweet giggle. "Go wash up, please."

Anna nodded and squirmed herself free so Jane put her on the floor and she headed off towards the kitchen to wash her hands. Jane smiled a loving smile at the sight before looking at Maura, seeing a hint of leftover tears in her eyes. "Hey," she cupped her wife's face and furrowed her brow. "You okay, babe?"

"Yes." Maura nodded and leaned forward to press her lips against Jane's. "I'm fine."

"Sure?"

"I'm sure." She kissed her wife again, this time with more passion, pulling Jane close by her neck. "I love you, Jane."

"I love you too." Jane smirked and shook her head, not understanding why her wife was so emotional.

Maura chuckled at the detective's confused state. "Come on Rizzoli, let's eat. I heard there are meatballs."


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

"Bye, Ahmed." Anna squeezed her small arms around the young man's neck. "Thanks to finds my new mommies."

Ahmed smiled and hugged the little girl in his arms as he kneeled on the floor in his office where Jane and Maura just signed the papers to make Anna their official daughter.

Jane felt Maura squeezing her hand as she moved closer, tears shimmering in her hazel eyes. Becoming a mother has opened up a lot of emotions in her. Jane felt the same, but she was better at hiding it. She didn't really understand it yet either. She was feeling a lot of things she had never felt before and she was scared and happy all at once. She tried not to pay attention to it and just take care of Anna as best as she could. That was her job now.

"Now, your mommies will be going back to work after the weekend," Ahmed said softly as he pulled back from the hug. "So keep in mind that things are going to be a little different then. But they're going to love you just as much."

"We work fewer hours and trade shifts the first few weeks," Maura said softly. "One of us will be home with her."

Ahmed nodded. He seemed reluctant to let Anna go. It would be final. She had found a new home and his job was done. After a few moments of silence, Ahmed stood back up and took a deep breath to compose himself. "Okay well, everything's settled here."

"Okay. Thanks." Jane took Anna's hand as the girl walked back to them.

He shook their hands and ruffled Anna's blond hair that was tied into a French braid on her back, one of Maura's creations. "Maybe I'll see you around someday, bug."

Anna nodded and showed a sweet smile as she waved at him. Ahmed waved back and watched as Maura lifted the girl into her arms and kissed her cheek. "Thank you, Ahmed," she said softly. "For everything."

Ahmed just nodded in response, unable to find words. He watched Maura taking Anna outside his office and swallowed a visible lump in his throat.

"Hey," Jane whispered, gently touching his arm. "Thank you."

Ahmed shrugged. "Just doing my job."

"You brought us to her. You gave us the most beautiful gift in the world." Jane smiled and looked down at her feet, fumbling with the car keys. "So thank you."

"You're welcome." Ahmed sighed and adjusted his jacket. "Take care of her, alright?"

"Of course."

"Jane babe!" Maura called from the hallway. "Do you have the keys?"

"Yeah!" Jane chuckled and shook her head. "I gotta go, let my family into the car."

Ahmed nodded, shook Jane's hand again and said his goodbyes before Jane headed outside towards her wife and now official daughter. She still couldn't believe it.

Back home, Anna shrugged off her coat and threw it on the floor, eliciting a glare from Maura. "Honey, put that away please."

Anna furrowed her brow and seemed scared for just a second before she saw the smile on Maura's face and she put her coat where it should be. Jane chuckled and sat on the couch, waiting for Anna to come back before pulling Anna in her arms as she covered her cheeks and forehead in kisses. "We're officially your mommies now, peanut!" she said as the girl giggled. "How's that feel?"

"I don't know." Anna shrugged and snuggled into Jane's front as she stopped her kisses. "Two mommies' kinda weird."

"Hm, why's that?" Jane rested her chin on top of Anna's head and looked up at Maura who put a cup of orange juice for Anna on the coffee table.

Anna shrugged. "'Cause then who's Mommy and who's Mommy?"

Jane chuckled. The girl had been calling both of them 'mommy' the past few days and she knew that would get complicated. "Well," Jane said softly, "you know how I call Grandma Angela 'Ma'?"

Anna shook her head. "No." She shifted sideways in Jane's lap, facing Maura who sat down next to them.

"Okay… Uhm… I mean, how about you call me 'Mama', and Maura 'Mommy'? Does that sound good?"

"Mama 'n Mommy?"

Jane nodded. "Yeah, it'd be weird to call me Daddy, right?"

The girl laughed, a real laugh. A rare sound coming from the shy girl. "You's not a daddy."

"No, she's not." Maura smiled a loving smile and handed Anna her cup of juice. "She's Mama. Is that okay?"

"Sure." Anna shrugged and sipped her juice, sitting comfortably in her new mother's lap. "Mama?" The girl giggled softly at the new word.

Jane smiled. "Yeah?"

"C-can…" Anna was losing her nerve and fumbled with her cup, almost spilling it over before Maura steadied it. "Can we m-maybe reads a story?"

Jane pulled her little girl closer in her arms and kissed the top of her head. "Of course, baby. Go pick one."

Anna squirmed off Jane's lap and put her cup on the table before running upstairs to grab a book. Jane felt tears in her eyes but quickly swallowed them, not allowing her emotions to rise to the surface. They were too unfamiliar. Too new. New was dangerous. She didn't like the unknown.

"Honey…" Maura brushed Jane's messy curls back and cupped her cheek to make her wife look at her. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah! Yeah, I'm fine." Jane nodded and showed a small smile that she wished turned out bigger. "I'm okay. I'm fine."

Maura chuckled. "It doesn't make it more believable when you say it four times, Jane."

"I'm fine."

"Five."

"Maur." Jane tilted her head.

"I'm sorry." Maura leaned forward and pressed her lips against her wife's for a quick loving kiss. "Just… know that you're not alone," she whispered. "I'm here. For whatever you need."

Jane just nodded, her throat squeezing shut with stupid feelings. She was happy when Anna came walking back into the living room in her usual, steady pace. It looked too grown-up for a three-year old, but Jane learned that that was her character. She didn't run around or jump. And on the rare occasion that she did, she scared herself and crawled back into her shell afterwards. It didn't mean she was unhappy. It was just who she was.

"Oh, great choice," Jane commented on the book Anna picked.

Anna smiled a proud smile and climbed back into Jane's lap, opening the book herself so Jane could start reading. She read the first page and felt Anna relaxing in her arms as she listened intently to the story. Jane knew she was going to devour every book in her way as soon as she could read. She loved to get lost in the fantasy of a story, to discover all the different worlds that books could hold.

After the story, the little family had dinner on the couch while they watched some new Disney-movie, and Anna fell asleep before the end of it. Maura took the girl in her arms and put her to bed, and the women enjoyed a quiet evening on the couch together as Maura watched a documentary and Jane went through her work e-mail before they went to bed.

"Jane…" Maura turned on her side in bed and wrapped her arm around her wife's waist, kissing the back of her shoulder. "What are you thinking, my love?"

Jane shook her head. "Nothing. Just trying to sleep."

"Don't do this, Jane," Maura whispered, her voice suddenly thick with tears. Jane couldn't bring herself to turn around and face her wife. She just shook her head again.

"Don't shut your feelings away. You don't have to and I don't want you to."

"I'm fine, Maura."

"Stop saying that!" The harshness in Maura's voice startled Jane and she turned her head to look at the woman that was leaning on her elbow to look at her. "You're feeling a lot of things that are new and scary and you're shutting them all away! Why? Don't you trust me?"

"No-…" 

"Then why aren't you talking to me, Jane?" Maura asked, her voice a little softer. She cupped the detective's cheek and brushed her thumb across her sharp cheekbone. "Is it Anna?"

"No-… Yeah… No. No, I love her." Jane shook her head and swallowed hard. "She's the best thing that ever happened to us."

Maura nodded, visibly relieved to hear that. "Then what is it, honey?"

"It's-…" Jane sighed and groaned softly, shifting to sit up against the headboard. She might as well spill it. "It's new. I'm feeling all these new things and I'm scared. There. That's it. I'm a homicide detective and a three-year old girl scares me 'cause I can't decide if I should let het have a cookie or a piece of fruit! It scares me when she looks at me with those awfully gorgeous eyes and sees me as a role model, as someone that will keep her safe. What if I can't, Maura?" She turned her head and immediately regretted speaking up when she saw tears in her wife's hazel eyes.

"You don't think I feel exactly the same?" Maura whispered quietly. "Every time I brush her teeth I get scared just because I'm afraid I'll miss a spot and cause dental problems when she gets older."

Jane chuckled through her tears. "Dental problems?"

Maura nodded, showing a sweet smile. "Yes. Or Anna catching a cold because I didn't tell her to put on a scarf. Or getting sick because I didn't put up a fight to get her to eat her vegetables." She sat up next to her wife and stroked Jane's cheek with the back of her hand. "But at the same time… I love her more than anyone in the world. And that's what gives me confidence."

Jane looked at her wife and nodded her head. "Yeah. That scares me too."

"It does?" Maura's voice was barely above a whisper as she kept her soothing strokes on Jane's cheek.

"Yeah." Jane shrugged and tried to brush it off with a smirk. "New feelings. Scary."

"She loves you too, Jane," Maura whispered. "She feels comfortable with you. She relaxes when she's with you, and she feels safe."

Jane nodded. She knew all that. Yet she was feeling stupid tears in her eyes. "I'm just-… I'm afraid I'm gonna mess it up."

"You are."

"What-…"

"You are going to mess up." Maura smiled and combed her fingers through Jane's curls, looking at her wife in the dark of the bedroom. "But a very wise woman told me the other day that even though you will make mistakes and that is going to hurt both you and Anna… She will love you through all of it. No matter what. Because that's what daughters do, isn't it?"

"Could that very wise woman be my mother?" Jane smirked through her tears.

"Maybe." Maura chuckled and pressed her lips against her wife's temple. "Your mother, who you had a lot of disagreements with and maybe even cursed at some points in your life… But did you ever stop loving her?"

A tear trickled down Jane's cheek as she shook her head. "No. Never."

"That's how it works, so I've been told. We will mess up and we will make mistakes. But we will apologize and we will never stop loving Anna, and she will never stop loving us."

"She might forget it from time to time, though."

Maura chuckled. "Well, yes. That's what puberty is for. But she'll grow out of that."

"She's gonna be a gorgeous teenager." Jane's lips curled up into a sweet smirk as she looked down at her hands in her lap.

"She is." Maura smiled a loving smile and rested her forehead against her wife's temple. "Everything is going to be fine, my love," she whispered. "We're the luckiest women in the world and everything is going to be fine."

Jane nodded. She turned her head and looked into her wife's beautiful hazel eyes that sparkled with love, even in the dark. "I love you, Maur," she whispered hoarsely. "I'm sorry for shutting you out."

Maura shook her head. "It's okay. It's just something you do every now and then. I know my detective."

Jane smirked. "I'm glad you do."


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

Maura closed the dishwasher that contained the dirty dishes from that Sunday family dinner, meanwhile listening to Anna and Angela talking in the living room. Anna was sitting on her knees in front of the coffee table, trying to put the pieces of a puzzle together.

"Good! Now, where do you think this one is going?" Angela offered another puzzle piece from her seat on the couch.

Anna furrowed her brow and took the piece from her grandmother, not looking at the older woman. She wasn't as scared as the first time she met her, but she wasn't entirely comfortable yet either. She still crawled back into her shell whenever she was around other people than her mothers.

"It's the cow," Anna said as she pointed at the picture on the box.

"Yeah, I think so too." Angela smiled and helped Anna putting the piece in the right place.

Maura smiled at the sight. It had only been a few weeks and she and Jane had been going back to work the past week, always making sure that one of them was home with Anna. It wouldn't last like that forever, Maura knew. Jane was becoming restless; she wanted to go back to her job fulltime. Maura wasn't as restless as Jane, but she was missing out on things at work. Every time she got into her office, she had to catch up on all the reports she missed and it took up a lot of energy. But at the same time, she wanted to be there for Anna. Spending a day with her daughter had become her favorite thing.

After a few moments, Angela stood up from the couch and turned to face Maura in the kitchen. "I have to go, Sean will be coming over soon."

Maura nodded and walked out of the kitchen to say goodbye to her mother-in-law. She gave her a quick hug and lifted Anna up in her arms as the girl stood next to her. "Can you say goodbye to Grandma Angela, honey?"

"Bye, Grandma," Anna said softly as her small hand waved at the older woman.

Angela chucked and gently pinched the girl's cheek. "Goodnight, Anna."

Maura closed the door behind her and adjusted Anna on her hip, smiling when she felt her small head resting on her shoulder. The girl sucked her thumb into her mouth and wrapped one of her arms around Maura's neck.

"Oh, Sunday dinners make you so tired, don't they honey?" Maura chuckled and shifted her daughter to her front to hug her tightly in her arms.

"Where's Mama?"

Maura smiled at the word 'Mama'. She loved hearing it. She loved that Jane and herself were Mama and Mommy to the most beautiful little girl on the planet. "Mama is giving Uncle Frankie a ride home. She'll be back soon."

Anna nodded. "Okay."

Maura kissed the side of Anna's head before putting her back down on the floor. "Did you eat your fruit today?"

"Nope."

"Nope? Let's make that a yep!" Maura chuckled and walked towards the kitchen to prepare some fruit for her daughter. "Grapes or apple?"

Anna pursed her lips and stood on her toes to try and look up on the counter. "Grapes."

While Maura threw a few grapes into a small plastic bowl, Anna finished the last pieces of her puzzle on the coffee table. She was quite good at it, and Maura was pleased to witness it. Anna was bright.

As Maura sat on the couch, Anna turned and climbed next to her mother, resting her head against the blonde's upper arm as she snuggled into her side. "Can I watch television, Mommy?"

"Just for a little bit until bedtime, okay?" Maura smiled at her daughter's affection and wrapped her arm around the little girl while she grabbed the remote control to turn on the television and look for some kind of cartoon Anna would like.

"This one!" Anna stopped her mother from zapping through the channels.

"What is it about?"

Anna shrugged. "I dunno. It's funny."

Maura pursed her lips and furrowed her brow, not wanting her daughter to look at any harmful television shows. After a few minutes, she knew that she cartoon was although absolutely stupid, not harmful in any way so she relaxed and gently pulled Anna up into her lap to have some much needed snuggle time with her little girl. Anna accepted it and tucked her feet up on the couch as she snuggled into Maura's chest, her gaze fixated on the television.

When the cartoon cut to the third episode, Maura started to get worried about her wife. She was only dropping Frankie off at his house, which shouldn't take more than twenty minutes, thirty tops. She grabbed her phone from the table next to her and rested her chin on top of Anna's head. Voicemail. "Jane, what's taking you so long?" she said into the phone. "Anna and I are waiting for you for bedtime, please call me back." She hung up and sighed deeply.

"Why's Mama not back?" Anna asked softly, having heard the conversation.

"I don't know, baby. She's probably just caught up talking to Uncle Frankie, that's all."

Anna turned her head and looked at her mother with an expression that startled Maura. She saw worry on the girl's young face. She picked up on Maura's concern effortlessly. Anna was too sensitive to ignore it. Maura smiled a hopefully reassuring smile and caressed Anna's pale cheek before she placed a quick kiss on her forehead. "It's okay, honey. I promise."

This put Anna at ease and she snuggled back into her original position. But Maura wasn't at ease. It had been over an hour now. She had called Jane twice, but the phone kept going to voicemail. She texted five times, but had gotten no reply.

Just when Anna started to drift off to sleep and Maura's concern grew bigger and bigger, Maura's phone rang. "Jane?"

"Hi," Jane's voice was husky and tired and she was outside, wind blowing and cars driving in the background.

"Jane, where are you? Are you okay?"

Anna stiffened in Maura's lap but Maura started soothing strokes on the girl's belly as she lowered her voice to try and avoid scaring her. "Jane?"

"Yeah, I'm okay. We uhm… We got in an accident."

Maura took in a sharp breath but contained herself when Anna turned her head to look at her with fear in her eyes. "Jane…"

"Some idiot drunk driver ran a red light and hit us from the side," Jane sounded defeated and exhausted.

"Frankie?"

"They're examining him right now. He was out of it, but the ambulance guy said he'll be alright."

"Oh, god." Maura closed her eyes and sighed.

"Car's pretty smashed up, though."

"And you?"

"I'm fine. Just some bruises on my leg and hip and a cut from the glass window, just above my eye."

Maura felt tears in her eyes. She hated to witness her wife in pain. She simply hated it. Whenever Jane was in pain, she was in pain. "You should let them examine you, Jane."

"They did, I just made them be fast so I could call you. My hip will hurt for a few days but it's nothing bad." Jane sighed and Maura heard the sound of her pacing back and forth in the street. "I'm hoping they let Frankie go soon."

"He should be spending at least one night in the hospital, if he suffered a head-injury."

"Yeah-… A doctor is coming, I'll call you later okay? I'll be home as soon as I can."

"Yes, okay. I love you, Jane."

"I love you too, give Anna a kiss from me."

"I will." Maura hung up the phone and put it down before seeing Anna looking up at her with fear and concern. She smiled at the girl and brushed her blond hair back. "Mama says hi," she said softly. "She told me to give you a kiss from her." Maura cupped Anna's chin and pursed her lips, feeling Anna pecking them before pulling back with the same look of fear in her grey eyes. "Mama and Uncle Frankie got hurt in the car today because another car hit Mama's car."

Anna's brow furrowed while her eyes widened, tears welling up in them.

"But she's going to be okay, she told me herself." Maura smiled and stroked Anna's cheek. "She's going to be just fine. She just won't be home for bedtime."

Anna nodded and averted her gaze. Her bottom lip quivered as she leaned forward to rest back against Maura's chest. "Oh it's going to be alright, honey," Maura whispered, pulling the girl close in her arms. "Mama will be back before you know it."

It touched her how attached Anna seemed to be to Jane. She truly missed her, and she was truly afraid for her mother. Sometimes Maura was afraid the girl would grow up to be too sensitive, and too aware of other people's feelings. She sucked them all up inside of her, but Maura didn't know if she ever let them go.

"It's bedtime for you, honey." Maura tucked a strand of hair behind Anna's ear and lifted her up from the couch before turning off the television.

They finished Anna's bedtime routine rather quickly. The girl was exhausted. She was clingy and kept clutching to her mother, like Maura had been her mother all her life. Maura kneeled in front of the girl as they stood in front of Anna's bed. "Would you like to sleep in our bed tonight?" she whispered softly.

Anna nodded. "Yeah."

"Okay." Maura lifted the girl in her arms and brought the book they started yesterday before heading towards their bedroom. She tucked Anna into bed and quickly changed out of her skirt and blouse and into a pair of shorts and a sweater from Jane before untying her ponytail and sliding in next to Anna.

She read the story as Anna listened with her usual undivided attention. Maura was grateful to feel Anna relaxing against her and sucking on her thumb as her eyes slowly closed. She would be asleep soon.

Maura tried to stay awake for Jane, clutching her phone the entire time, but there was no sign of her. She knew Jane was busy with Frankie, but she worried anyway. It was almost 2AM when she finally heard the front door opening. Maura untangled herself from the little girl that was sleeping against her side and hurried out of bed and downstairs.

When she saw her wife, she practically ran towards the love of her life and threw her arms around the detective's neck. "Oh, Jane."

Jane's strong arms wrapped around Maura's waist and squeezed. "I'm okay, Maur. I'm sorry." 

Maura nodded and held the strong embrace for a few more seconds before pulling away to have a good look at her wife. It was worse than she told her. Her eye was quite swollen and there was blood in her hair. She was limping and Maura knew she had a headache. "Jane…" she whispered, her hand combing through messy curls. She sighed and pressed her lips against her wife's for a fierce kiss. "How's Frankie?"

"They're keeping him overnight, just to be sure because he has a concussion. But he's gonna be fine. Tommy's taking him home tomorrow."

Maura just nodded. She threw her arms back around the taller woman's neck and placed kisses against her jaw. "Thank God you're alright."

Jane's strong arms almost hurt as they squeezed around Maura's waist. "I'd never leave you guys like that."

"I know." Maura chuckled and shook her head, but suddenly thought about Anna upstairs. "Oh, Anna was so afraid…"

"What did you tell her?"

"Just that you and Frankie got hurt in the car, but that you're both going to be alright. But she senses my concern, Jane. She senses what people are feeling and she takes it all in."

"She's sensitive like that."

Maura nodded. "Maybe too sensitive." She pressed her lips against Jane's cheek and inhaled her wife's scent, molding her body against Jane's. "She's asleep in our bed."

"Bed." Jane smirked and pulled back with a deep sigh. "I hope there's room left for me 'cause I'm exhausted."

"Of course."

Jane made quick work of getting out of her stained clothes, tossing all of them in the laundry before slipping on an oversized T-shirt and sitting on the edge of the bed next to their sleeping daughter. Maura smiled as she watched silently from the doorway.

"I'm sorry baby," Jane whispered quietly. "I'm sorry you were afraid."

Maura's heart swelled with love as she witnessed the motherly care and deep, pure love in Jane's movements. She had never seen it like this before, not until Anna came into their lives.

"Mama?" Anna opened one eye, looking sleepily up at her mother.

"Hi, baby," Jane whispered as she comfortingly stroked Anna's hair. "I just wanted to let you know I'm back and I'm okay." 

Anna smiled a sleepy smile, only half-awake. "Good."

"Go back to sleep, honey." Jane leaned down and softly pressed her lips against Anna's forehead. "Mama's here."

Anna nodded and closed her eyes again, already halfway back asleep. Jane stood up, walked across the other side of the bed and carefully pulled the sleeping girl into her arms as she lay down in the middle. "You comin'?" she whispered, turning her head to look at Maura.

Maura swallowed the lump in her throat and nodded with a happy smile. She climbed into bed next to her wife and wrapped her arm around her wife's waist, pressing her lips against Jane's shoulder from behind.

"I love you, Maur," Jane whispered, lacing her fingers with Maura's on her stomach as she pulled her wife tighter against her back. "I'm sorry."

"For what?" Maura replied quietly. "You didn't do anything wrong. The intoxicated man did, the man that hurt your brother."

Jane sighed. "I was scared, Maura."

Maura swallowed hard. After years of marriage, she knew how hard it still was for her wife to admit to her feelings. Especially if that feeling was fear. "Of course you were."

"I thought I lost him for a second…" Jane's voice was soft and strangled with unshed tears. "The metal crushed and I saw flashes of light and then he was just sitting there, bleeding from his head… He didn't reply… I kept screaming at him but he was out…"

"My love…"

Jane shook her head. "He came by pretty soon and the ambulance was very quick. He opened his eyes and he replied and I got him out."

"You were very brave, Jane."

"Just lucky." Jane shrugged.

Maura sighed deeply and pressed her lips against her wife's neck. "My brave, brave detective." She heard her wife sniffling softly and knew she had to stop. She felt Jane's muscles tensing as she pulled her walls up around her feelings. "Sleep, honey," Maura whispered. "I love you."

"Love you too," Jane mumbled back before she closed her eyes and her muscles slowly relaxed.

Maura waited until her wife's breathing evened out before she allowed herself to give in to her exhaustion, closing her eyes to fall into a restless sleep.


	8. Chapter 8

_A/N Just as some of you requested, more Jane-time! I hope you like it, please let me know your thoughts and feelings._

Chapter 8

"Mama?" Anna looked up at her mother with concern in her eyes. She climbed up on the couch, still wearing her pajamas.

Jane smiled a loving smile when she felt Anna's cold fingers gently touch the cut above her eye. "You have pain?" Anna asked softly.

Jane shook her head. "No, baby. I'm okay."

"Is it blood?"

"Yeah but it's all dried up now, see?" Jane smiled and took Anna's hand away from her eye to press a kiss to the girl's knuckles. "I'm all better."

Anna looked at her mother with a mature kind of concern that didn't fit a three-year old. Jane furrowed her brow. She worried about how concerned Anna could be, how much she cared. She should be careless. Jane cupped Anna's face, pressed a kiss to her forehead and pulled her into her arms. "Come on, peanut. Let's wake sleepyhead Mommy."

Anna giggled softly. "Mommy's not sleepyhead!"

"She is! She's still sleeping and it's already…" Jane looked at the clock on the wall. "Seven o' clock!"

Anna gasped without understanding that seven AM actually was still quite early to be up on that particular Monday morning. "Yeah, she's sleepyhead."

Jane chucked and lifted Anna in her arms to stand up from the couch before heading upstairs to her sleeping wife. She opened the bedroom door and saw that Maura was still in bed, the alarm clock would go off in two minutes so Jane quickly walked in with Anna on her hip. She set the girl down on the bed and watched with a loving smile as Anna crawled towards her mother.

"Mommy," Anna whispered, leaning down on her knees to whisper in Maura's ear. "You gotta wake up."

Maura lips curled up into a loving smile. She was already awake.

"You's a sleepyhead, Mommy," Anna giggled quietly.

Maura gasped, her eyes still closed. "A sleepyhead?"

Anna chuckled. "Mama said so."

"Oh, she did, didn't she?" Maura opened her eyes and smiled at her wife next to the bed. "Why was Mama up so early?"

Jane shrugged. "Couldn't sleep." 

Maura furrowed her brow in concern but decided to let it go for now. She turned her attention back to Anna who was still on her knees on the bed. "Did you sleep well?" she asked softly while she brushed her daughter's messy blond hair back.

Anna nodded. "Yeah."

"Hm." Maura slightly sat up and pulled the little girl into her arms while she kissed the top of her head. "Are you ready to spend your first morning with Grandma Angela today?"

Anna shrugged, snuggling into Maura's side as her head rested on her mother's chest. "When's you gonna be back?"

"I'll be back for dinner, but Mama will be back at lunch."

"I wanted to visit Frankie though," Jane said softly, sitting on the edge of the bed. "I don't think I should take her, do you?"

Maura sighed and looked at the girl against her chest. "No. She'd worry too much."

"I'll try to get out early, so I can be back after lunch."

"You hear that, honey? After lunch."

"So long?" Anna looked up at Jane and Jane saw fear and discomfort in her eyes.

"It's not that long." Jane smiled a reassuring smile and tucked a strand of hair behind Anna's ear. "I'll be back before you know it, and you're gonna have a great time with Grandma."

Anna nodded hesitantly. She was comfortable with Angela, but she still scared her just a little. She felt safe with her mothers now, and that was a big step. Now it was time for her to start get comfortable around the rest of the family. The women had to go back to work at some point, and Angela had offered to look after Anna for now. Maybe as Anna got more settled into the family, she would be ready for pre-school or daycare. But for now, that was not an option.

Jane expected it would be difficult for her to get out of work early, but it wasn't. Yes, she hated missing out on things but she looked forward to coming back to her daughter. The way Anna's face lit up as soon as she saw her would never fail to make her heart jump.

"Look." Jane turned her wrist to show her watch to Anna. "See how the small pointer right here is down to here? The small number seven?"

Anna nodded, furrowing her brow as she looked at the watch. She didn't know how to read numbers yet, but she understood what Jane meant.

"When this pointer goes up to here, the two," Jane pointed at the small numbers on her watch, "I will be back. Promise."

"Here?" Anna's little fingers touched the watch on her mother's wrist.

"Yeah, right there."

Anna showed a small smile, indicating that she was happy to know exactly when her mother would be back. "Okay."

Jane smiled and looked at her wife to see a similar smile curling her perfect lips. "You wanna hold on to my watch for me? So you can keep an eye on it?"

"Yeah." Anna nodded and showed an even bigger smile as Jane took the watch off. She put it around Anna's wrist but it was way too big.

Maura chuckled. "How about we put on a skirt or a pair of pants with pockets so you can put it in there?" 

"Yeah, okay." Anna nodded, giggling softly. "The blue skirt?"

Maura brushed her daughter's hair back and smiled at the beautiful girl. "Yes." She kissed her forehead. "Now go put it on before we are late."

Anna squirmed off the bed and headed off towards her bedroom to get dressed, eliciting a smile from her mothers. "One of us should help her," Maura said as she looked up at Jane. "She'll put everything on backwards and she can't tie her shoes."

Jane hummed and was about to walk away but Maura stopped her. "Jane," she took Jane's hand in hers. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Jane." Maura tilted her head.

Jane sighed. "Anna was just concerned about me, I felt bad for her."

Maura nodded, showing a sad smile. "She cares about you."

"Guess she does." Jane smiled and leaned down to press a kiss to Maura's lips. "She's gonna be fine."

Maura hummed and allowed the kiss to linger for a few lovely moments. "Yes, she will."

The day lasted long. There was a killer on the run that was very intelligent and too good at hiding his or her clues, and the team was restless without a lead. It frustrated everyone, and there was tension in the squad room. Jane kept going over the puzzle pieces time after time, but she was clueless. She was happy to get out by lunchtime, having enough time to quickly visit Frankie at his apartment.

Angela had moved in with Frankie temporarily, which he hated. She only headed out to babysit Anna and would be back during the afternoon. Frankie had a concussion and whined about Angela's voice making it worse, but he did it all with a sweet smile and a happy sparkle in his dark eyes. He didn't mind. He had a bad headache, but nothing was truly wrong and he would get better in a few weeks. His ribs were bruised and he had stitches in his right arm and on his forehead, so he looked worse than he was. They had been incredibly lucky.

Jane left in time to be home for her two o' clock curfew, parking her car in the garage five minutes early. When she opened the back door and walked into the kitchen, she was greeted by the sight of Anna and Angela at the kitchen counter.

"Mama!" Anna tried to jump off the stool but Angela stopped her.

"Whoa, little daredevil. Careful!" She helped Anna down and watched the girl speeding off towards her mother.

"Mama!" Anna held up her arms and Jane pulled her off the floor, hugging her to her chest.

"Hi, baby."

"You's early!" Anna pulled back and wiggled in Jane's arms to squirm the watch out of her pocket. "Look," she said softly as she showed the watch to her mother. "The big one's not up there yet."

"How'd you know about the big one?" Jane asked, smiling proudly at her little girl.

"Grandma tolds me." Anna straightened her back and grinned proudly.

"Hm, you're smart!"

Anna shrugged and wrapped one of her short arms around Jane's neck, the other snuggling under herself as she nuzzled into Jane's shoulder. Jane smiled and closed her eyes as she kissed the side of Anna's head. "Did you have a good time with Grandma?" she asked softly, opening her eyes to look at her mother in the kitchen.

Anna just nodded and sucked her thumb into her mouth, clearly tired from that morning.

"How was she, Ma?" Jane asked as she stepped towards her mother.

Angela sighed. "She was good. Until about 1PM, then she started getting restless for you."

Jane put her hand on the back of Anna's head and pulled her closer. "Restless?"

"Yes," Angela smiled a reassuring smile. "Nothing bad. She just got very quiet and crawled back into her little shell. She kept asking for you, so I explained to her that the big pointer on the watch needed to be all the way up."

"This sounds crazy," Jane whispered, resting her head against her daughter's, "but I'm glad she asked for me like that."

"She loves you, Janie." Angela smiled and stepped forward to squeeze Jane's arm.

"The feeling's mutual. I just-…" Jane sighed. "Was she okay? With you?"

Angela nodded. "She was a little upset when Maura left this morning, but then we picked out a book together and I read it to her, which calmed her down. Then she was just fine, she even talked to me and everything." Angela chuckled, looking at the tired girl in Jane's arms. "It was just the last hour that she got anxious."

Jane sighed. "I want her to be comfortable around other people."

"She will be. I mean… she hasn't been with you for that long and look at her!" Angela brushed Jane's hair back and lovingly caressed her daughter's cheek. "She's already hiding in your arms, because that's her safe place."

Jane pulled her daughter even closer, feeling the girl relaxing more and more against her front. "I love her," she whispered. "More than I could ever know."

Tears shimmered in Angela's eyes as she nodded and pressed a kiss to Jane's cheek, surprised and delighted by her daughter's heartfelt statement. "I know. I see it."

Jane smiled. She hid her face into Anna's loose curls, placing a kiss on the girl's head. "Did you already have lunch, baby?"

Anna nodded. "Yah. Sandwiches."

"Hm, any left for me?"

Anna giggled and lightly shook her head. "Nope. Grandma and I eats them all."

Jane gasped playfully, pulling back to look at her daughter, happy to get out of her sentimental mood. "All of them?"

Anna giggled louder, covering her mouth with one hand as the other still held the watch. "Yeah!"

Jane adjusted her left arm under Anna's bottom as she used the other to tickle the girl's stomach. "All in your belly?"

Anna laughed and grabbed Jane's hand with her smaller ones. "Yeah! Stop, Mama!"

"Stop?"

"Stop!" Anna laughed louder, a sound that made Jane's heart swell. "Mama!"

"I didn't hear the magic word…!"

"Please Mama!"

Jane chuckled and stopped her playful assault, pressing a kiss to Anna's forehead. "You wanna say goodbye to Grandma? She's got to go back to Uncle Frankie."

Anna nodded, turning her head to look at her grandmother. "Bye, Grandma."

Angela smiled and carefully reached out to caress Anna's cheek. "Bye, sweetheart. I had a great time with you."

Anna didn't reply and just nodded. Jane chuckled and allowed her mother to kiss her cheek. "Bye Ma. Thank you." 

"No problem. I'd love to babysit her more often."

"Thanks. We'll have to talk about it once Maura and I go back to work fulltime."

"Of course. Take your time, there's no hurry." Angela squeezed Jane's arm, put on her coat and said her usual loud goodbyes before heading out.

Jane put Anna down on top of the kitchen counter and brushed her hair back. "What do you want to do this afternoon, baby?"

Anna pursed her lips, wiggling her feet back and forth through the hair as she lifted one of her shoulders. "You don't has work?"

Jane shrugged. "Just a little bit, but don't tell anyone."

Anna giggled. "'Kay."

"How about we go out to the market, to get some groceries and make homemade pizza tonight? Does that sound good?"

"Pizza?" Anna's eyes widened as her pale lips curled into a happy smile.

"Yeah, good plan?"

Anna nodded fiercely. "Yeah. Real good."

Jane chuckled and pressed her lips to Anna's forehead before lifting her off the counter to put her back on the floor. "Alright peanut, go grab your coat."

By the time the pizzas were finished and in the oven, the counter was covered in cheese, tomato sauce, leftover pepperoni and other food. Anna was sitting on top of the counter, her skirt stained, the sleeves of her sweater pulled up to her elbows. She wore a content smile on her face, one that Jane loved more and more with each day. It wasn't a full smile, but it was just enough to slightly curl the girl's lips into a shy, small smile.

"When's Mommy gonna be back?" Anna asked for the sixth time that past hour.

"Soon, baby. Any minute now." Jane took a towel and wiped some sauce off Anna's cheek, chuckling at the sight. "You made a big mess, peanut!"

Anna giggled. "You too, Mama!"

Jane cleaned Anna's face and tucked a strand of hair back into her ponytail, the only hairdo Jane could manage. "We're gonna have to clean up before Mommy gets home, she'll be real mad!"

"Oh, no." Anna's eyes went wide; the girl didn't pick up on the joke.

"I'm kidding, baby." Jane smirked and lifted Anna off the counter. "She won't be mad. But you do need to go wash your hands before it gets everywhere."

Anna did as instructed, stepping up on her step stool to reach the sink as she rinsed the remnants of the sauce off her hands, but the front door opened before she could dry them.

"Hello, my loves." Maura entered the room with a bright smile.

"Mommy!" Anna hopped off the step stool and ran towards Maura, eagerly reaching up her arms.

Maura laughed and lifted the girl up from the floor, giving her a squeezing hug. "Hi, sweetheart."

"Mommy, we mades pizza."

"Pizza?" Maura kissed the side of Anna's head before walking towards her wife to capture her lips in a soft, gentle kiss. "A Maura Isles-approved pizza?"

Jane pursed her lips, nodding her head with a sparkle in her eye. "Mushrooms and all."

Maura smiled. "I love you both." She brushed her hand through Anna's hair and kissed her cheek. "Now, I'm starving!"

"The oven's gotta beep, Mommy. It's gonna beep when the big one's up…" she reached to her pocket and got out the watch she was still carrying with her. She pointed at the nine, "here."

Maura gasped. "Who told you that?"

"Mama." Anna straightened her back and grinned proudly. "And Grandma too."

Maura smiled and gave her daughter another kiss before putting her down and taking off her coat and scarf. She watched as Anna walked towards the oven, putting her face close to the glass to see the pizza's bubbling as they heated. "Don't get too close, honey. It's too warm."

Anna nodded, but kept focusing on the pizza. "It's almost done, Mommy. I can see it."

Maura chuckled and stepped towards Jane to wrap her arm around her wife's waist, comfortably resting against the brunette's side. "How was your day?" she whispered, pressing a kiss to Jane's lips as she turned her head.

"Good." Jane kissed her wife again and wrapped her arms around the blonde's upper body. "She asked for you ten times. Same for me before I got home."

Maura sighed but Jane saw a loving smile curling her lips as well as a happy sparkle dancing in her hazel eyes. "Children usually ask for their mothers. It's natural."

Jane kissed the side of Maura's head, inhaling the scent of her familiar perfume. "We're her mothers, and her safe place."

"We are." Maura turned her head to look into her wife's eyes. "We're the luckiest women in the world."

Jane pressed her lips against her wife's in a loving kiss before turning her attention back to Anna, who was still staring into the oven, holding Jane's watch tightly in her right hand. Her light blond hair was trying to get out of its ponytail, and a few curls were framing the girl's beautiful face. An angel. She looked like an angel. A slightly stained, messy angel. Jane smiled to herself. She was their angel. And they would never let her go.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

Maura quietly opened Anna's bedroom door, smiling when she saw the girl still asleep. It was rare to see her sleeping until almost 8AM. She usually woke up awfully early, but she was allowed to stay up last night so she was rather tired. Maura walked towards Anna's bed in the corner of the room, sitting on the edge to gently caress her messy bed-hair. "Anna, honey," she said softly. "Wake up."

Anna let out a deep breath but didn't open her eyes, causing Maura to chuckle. "Wake up, baby." She shook Anna's shoulder. "We're going to the park today, remember?"

With that, Anna slowly opened her eyes, which turned out to be awfully small. Maura's smile fell and she furrowed her brow. They shouldn't have let Anna stay up so late last night. "Good morning, sweetheart," Maura whispered as light grey eyes looked up at her.

Anna let out a big yawn and lifted her hands from under the covers to rub her eyes. "M'rnin'…" she mumbled, barely audible.

"Oh you went to bed way too late last night." Maura pulled the girl into her arms, kissing the top of her head.

Anna just shrugged as she wiggled herself into Maura's lap, trying to get the warmth of her blankets back. She rested her head on her mother's chest and sucked her thumb into her mouth.

"You're going early tonight, okay honey?" Maura asked softly, pulling the girl closer. "And maybe for a nap this afternoon."

"'Kay."

Maura kissed the top of Anna's head. "Are you too tired for the park?"

"Noooo." Anna showed a slight smile as she slowly woke up.

Maura chuckled. "Good. Please put on your jeans today, it's cold outside." She brushed Anna's hair back and looked at her. "Kiss?"

Anna pecked her mother's lips before sliding off her lap to get dressed for the day. She stepped out of her pajama pants and headed for her jeans until Maura stopped her. "Clean underwear, baby."

"Oh yeah." Anna opened her drawer and got out a clean pair of underwear while wiggling out of her old pair.

Maura chuckled and helped the girl close her pants, pull off her sleep shirt to get her into a warm sweater before handing her a pair of socks and getting ready for breakfast and then the park. Jane was on call but Maura had the day off, so she was sure to spend the day with her daughter.

They were falling more and more for the little girl with every day that passed. It was scary, new, unfamiliar and sometimes even close to frightening but they simply loved her. They loved Anna and they would never stop.

Walking through the park, they each held one of Anna's hand as the girl walked in between them, impressed by all the things around her. She watched the trees, the path, the ducks and the dogs that passed… Everything was an adventure for her. A brand new world, ready to be discovered.

"Mama 'n Mommy," Anna asked after a few minutes of walking in silence, "can I play over there?"

Maura looked at the small playground Anna was pointing at and nodded. "Yes, baby."

Anna smiled and let go of their hands. She ran for a few steps before she two other kids and steadied her pace, creeping into her shell. She walked around the kids and headed for the slide, looking at her mothers and climbing up on it after they smiled at her.

"You look beautiful today," Jane whispered suddenly, wrapping her arm around Maura's shoulders.

Maura looked up at her wife with a surprised smile. Maura was wearing a simple pair of jeans, a warm coat and a red scarf, her hair tied into a ponytail. Nothing special. Yet Jane was looking at her like she was the most beautiful piece of art in the world. "Thank you." Maura leaned in for a sweet kiss on Jane's lips before turning her attention back to Anna who was climbing back up the slide.

Maura's arm tightened around Jane's waist as she snuggled into her side, trying to get warm. "It's getting quite cold," she said softly.

"Hm." Jane hummed in response and strengthened their embrace by wrapping both her arms around Maura's upper body and pressing a kiss to her lips.

After they shared a few more light kisses, Maura looked back to the small playground and tensed up when she saw a boy and a girl talking to Anna. They both looked a little bit older than Anna, which made Anna very nervous. "Jane," Maura said softly, squeezing Jane's side to get her attention.

Jane narrowed her eyes. "Let's wait it out."

Maura nodded. They should let Anna take care of herself, but she was feeling nervous for the little girl. She saw the anxiety on her face as she tried to socialize with the two unfamiliar children who wanted to play a game with her. The kids were sweet to Anna, which put Maura more at ease. Anna looked at her mothers for approval, and Jane nodded at her.

Before the children could even start to play, a middle-aged woman came into view. She gestured towards the two children and said something that made Anna lower her head and drop her shoulders. The woman took the boy's hand and motioned the girl to walk away.

"But Mom, we just got here!" the boy whined loudly.

The woman didn't reply to his words and just pulled on his hand.

Jane furrowed her brow and let go of Maura to walk towards the woman. "Jane, what are you doing?" Maura asked, following her wife.

Jane didn't answer. "Excuse me?" she asked the woman. "Is there a problem?"

The woman was startled by the tall, intimidating woman for a second before she composed herself and straightened her back. She pushed her glasses up her nose and tucked her short, dark hair back. "I don't want my children to play with yours."

"Excuse me?" Jane said a little too harshly.

Anna sensed the tension between the grown-ups nd she stood next to Maura, resting against her mother's leg. Maura smiled soothingly and caressed Anna's hair that was tied into a braid to the side.

"I don't agree with this _lifestyle_ ," the woman motioned towards the two women and had the most degrading look in her eyes Maura had ever seen. Like they weren't even worth talking to. Like they were less than the bugs on the ground. Maura felt a painful sting in her stomach.

"I don't want my kids to be influenced by _this_." The woman tugged on the boy's hand.

"I wanna play, Mom!" The boy whined.

"Shh, we're leaving." The woman looked angrily down at the boy.

"But Mom, you said-…."

"Stop it! I said we're leaving! We're not staying around people like them. Or their kids."

Jane seemed to have found her words back and stepped forward. "People like us? You don't even know us! You think you're better than us?"

"Oh I _know_ I'm better than you." The woman raised her eyebrows. "You should know better than to flaunt your despicable lifestyle around in public like this. It's offensive."

"To who?" Jane asked, her voice getting dangerously louder. "What did we do, huh? Did we yank our kid away from playing? Did we yell at strangers? Did we offend people we don't even know? Oh-… Oh no, that's YOU!"

The danger in Jane's voice startled the woman, but she didn't reply.

Maura could only feel tears in her eyes. She was unable to speak. She felt Anna closer and closer to her leg so she reached down and pulled the girl up in her arms, resting her on her hip. Anna's head rested on Maura's shoulder, her short arms wrapping around her mother's neck as she looked shyly at the woman and two children in front of them.

"She's not even yours, is she?" the woman said, looking at Anna on Maura's hip.

"She is," Maura answered, startling herself. She could offend Jane and her all she wanted but she had to stay away from Anna. That was a step too far. Anna was theirs. She was their daughter, and no one else's.

The woman pursed her lips. "A light blond kid with eyes like that? She's not yours. That's what people like you do. You ignore the fact that God never wants you to have children, so you take someone else's."

Jane's hands balled into fists next to her side and Maura saw that familiar fire in her dark eyes. She went too far. Maura unconsciously pulled Anna closer and steadied herself for a rage outbreak. "Jane," she said softly, trying in vain to calm her wife down.

"I suggest you go away right now if you want to come home in one piece," Jane growled, stepping dangerously closer to the horrible woman.

"Are you trying to threaten me?"

"Are you trying to offend me?"

"No."

"You did."

"Can't say I'm sorry."

Jane fists started shaking and Maura knew she had to step in. She placed her hand on Jane's shoulder. "Jane, let's go."

Jane shrugged her off but Maura wouldn't let her. "Jane. She's not worth it."

Hearing that, Jane's muscles relaxed and her shoulders dropped. She stepped back and shook her head. "You're not worth it," she repeated softly. "C'mon, let's go home."

Maura followed her wife, not even giving the woman another look as they walked back to the car. "We going back?" Anna asked, her voice small and laced with fear.

"Yes, honey. We're going home." Maura adjusted Anna on her hip and kissed the side of her head.

Anna just nodded, sensing that she shouldn't protest. Jane drove them home, breaking almost all the speed limits until Maura stopped her sternly. Back home, she got out of the car and slammed the door shut. "I'm going for a run."

Maura sighed and closed her eyes for a second before helping Anna out of the car. Jane had to cool off. She knew her wife. She needed to get her anger out or else she would start hitting the walls.

When she turned her attention towards Anna, she saw tears in her beautiful eyes. "What's Mama doing?" she asked weakly.

"She's running, honey." Maura leaned down and unzipped Anna's coat, putting it away before shedding her own and taking Anna's hand to walk into the house. "Would you like something to drink?"

Anna shook her head. She still had tears in her eyes. Maura sighed and sat on the couch, pulling Anna into her lap facing her. "Mama needs to go running sometimes, so she can get her feelings out."

Anna furrowed her brow. "Is Mama sad?"

"Yes. And angry."

Anna's eyes widened and shimmered with tears. "To me?"

"Oh, no honey! No, not with you." Maura kissed Anna's forehead and placed her hands on the girl's cheeks to look into her eyes. "You did nothing wrong, baby. Nothing."

Anna relaxed and nodded.

"Mama's mad because the lady at the park was mean at us. She said some very hurtful things." Maura felt tears squeezing her throat shut as she thought back to the things she said. "She hurt me and Mama."

Anna saw the tears in her mother's eyes and that made her own tears spill. "She's bad lady," she said softly.

Maura smiled through her tears. She shook her head. "She just has different beliefs than us." A tear fell down her cheek and she averted her gaze towards her hands that had lowered to Anna's sides. "That in itself doesn't make her a bad person. The way she treated us does."

Anna didn't understand any of her mother's words, but she sensed the tone. She felt Maura's sadness and hurt and she sat up in Maura's lap to wrap her short arms around the blonde's neck. Maura smiled through her tears and pressed her lips against the side of the girl's head while she squeezed her close in her arms.

Anna pulled her arms back and squirmed to reach into the pocket of her jeans, pulling out Jane's watch, which she was still carrying with her. Jane could do without it, so she said. It soothed Anna and it eased her anxiety. She sat back down in Maura's lap and held up the watch. "When's Mama gonna be back?" she asked softly.

Maura sighed and tucked a strand of loose hair behind Anna's ear. "I don't know, honey."

Anna shook her head. That wasn't the right answer. "When the big one's up?"

Maura closed her eyes and pulled the girl back to her chest. She looked at the watch and decided Jane would probably be back within an hour and a half, at least. "When the big one is at the three. Right here."

Anna sighed in relief and nodded against Maura's chest. "Okay." She put the watch back in her pocket and snuggled into her mother's warm front, trying to suppress a yawn.

"You're going for a nap later, okay baby?" Maura whispered.

"Okay." Anna sighed and sucked her thumb into her mouth. "When?"

"Hm," Maura looked at the clock and kissed the top of Anna's head. "After snuggles."

Anna chuckled. "'Kay."

Forty-five minutes later, Anna was tucked into bed and fast asleep when the front door opened and Jane walked into the house. She looked more at ease. Maura smiled at her wife from behind the kitchen counter where she was making coffee. "Hi," she said softly. "How are you?"

Jane shrugged and filled a glass of water, taking a large sip. "Fine."

Maura sighed. "Are you?"

Jane shook her head and put the now empty glass down on the counter. "No."

"She is an awful woman, Jane," Maura whispered. "Don't let her get to you."

After another deep sigh, Jane shook her head and brushed a hand through her hair. "I'm going to take a shower."

Maura watched her wife walking upstairs and decided not to leave it. She turned off the coffee machine, turned the lock on the front door and headed after Jane. When she got upstairs, the shower was already running. She took off her clothes, putting them on the bed before quietly walking into the bathroom, sliding the shower door to the side.

Jane was standing with her back to her wife, her shoulders dropped, her dark hair flat against her back. Maura stepped under the warm spray and wrapped her arms around her wife's waist, pressing her naked front against Jane's back. She kissed Jane's bare shoulder and felt her crying softly. "My love…"

"I-… I get that people disapprove of us," Jane said, her voice hesitating and husky, "we've dealt with that before. But now… with Anna… It's-…"

"It's unfair," Maura whispered, barely audible above the spray of the shower. "It's so unfair."

"She shouldn't have taken her kids away from Anna. Anna didn't ask for us to be her moms. She didn't ask for any of this," Jane's voice was strangled with tears as she tangled her hands with Maura's around her waist. "I never want her to get hurt because of us. She doesn't deserve to get hurt just because her moms are gay. I didn't even choose to be gay! I just fell for you…!"

"I know, my love." Maura tightened her arms around Jane's waist. "I know."

"I don't understand that woman." Jane sighed. "How can you be so disrespectful?"

Maura shook her head and turned to stand in front of Jane, smiling at her beautiful wife naked in front of her. She wrapped her arms around Jane's neck and gently pushed her back into the hot spray of the shower, feeling her wife's tensed muscles. "Don't let her get to you, Jane," she said softly, reaching up to press her lips against her wife's. "She's not worth your energy."

Maura's hands gently started massaging the muscles in Jane's neck and shoulders, eliciting a slight moan from the detective. "I'm sorry I ran away," she whispered. "Is Anna sleeping?"

"Yes, I put her down for a nap." Maura leaned forward and nuzzled her nose into the crook of her wife's wet neck. "She'll be happy to see you are back when she wakes up."

Jane hummed. "Was she upset?"

"Just a little. She went to sleep peacefully, so hopefully she'll forget about it soon." Maura pulled away to look at her gorgeous detective. "And so should you." She captured Jane's lips in a deep, loving kiss and felt her wife's strong, scarred hands running up and down her back and sides before cupping her ass, eliciting an exciting gasp from the doctor.

"This will help me forget," Jane smirked as she pulled her wife's slippery body flush against her own.

Maura dragged her fingertips up and down Jane's spine before pushing her back against the cold wall. She used her lips to place a trail of kisses across Jane's shoulder and neck, up to her ear. "Good," she purred seductively. "Forget it."

After a lovely, hot and much-needed shower, the women dried off and Maura was busy brushing her hair when Anna's bedroom door opened. Jane was sitting on the edge of their bed as she put on a pair of socks and looked up to see a sleepy girl walking down the hall. "Hi, baby," she greeted her with a smile.

"Mama!" Anna saw that her mother was back and ran into their room, almost crashing into Jane as she climbed up on the bed and into Jane's lap.

"Hi, peanut." Jane smiled lovingly and brushed her hand through Anna's hair that was in a braid that morning, but was now loosely hanging around her shoulders, the braid somewhere in a mess of knots.

"You's back before the time, Mama," Anna said softly, fumbling with a wet curl on Jane's chest as she smiled up at her mother.

Jane nodded. "Yeah, I missed you and Mommy."

Anna chuckled and shook her head. "Nooo."

"Yeah!" Jane looked up at Maura and winked. "Right, Maur?"

"Oh yes." Maura put the hairbrush on her nightstand and sat next to her wife and daughter. "She pretends to be so tough, but really she just wants to snuggle with us all day."

Anna giggled softly and shifted to sit comfortably in Jane's lap, sucking on her thumb as she rested her head on Jane's chest. "Mommy?"

"Hm?" Maura shifted to rest against Jane's side and caressed Anna's cheek as she looked into her expecting grey eyes.

"When's I gonna go back?"

"Back where, honey?"

"To the other kids?"

Maura swallowed and furrowed her brow, quickly looking at her wife before looking back at Anna. "You're not, baby. You're with us now, we adopted you."

"What's that?" Anna lowered her thumb and looked expectantly at her mother.

"It means that we're your mommies," Jane explained softly. "Forever."

Anna shot her attention towards Jane, looking up at her with wide eyes. "Forever?"

"Yeah, baby. Forever."

"I's never gonna go back?"

Jane shook her head. "No."

Anna furrowed her brow and looked down at the floor, lost in thought for a moment. "Is you gonna be my mommies 'til I'm really old?"

"Yes."

"I never has to go back?"

Maura felt tears in her eyes as she shook her head and cupped Anna's cheek, gently brushing her thumb across her pale skin. "No, sweetheart. Never."

Both women held their breath for a split second when Anna didn't reply, until her face broke out into a sweet smile.

Jane sighed in relief. "We love you way too much to ever send you back, peanut. We're never letting you go. Ever." She tightened her arms around her daughter and rested her chin on top of her head to look at her wife with shimmering eyes.

"I loves you too," Anna said softly before she put her thumb back into her mouth and snuggled back in Jane's arms.

Maura felt a tear trickling down her cheek and smiled lovingly while she pressed her lips against Anna's forehead. It was the first time Anna told them she loved them back. She probably didn't fully understand the true meaning and depth of it, but it meant the world to her mothers. She was only three, but in that moment she knew she had found a permanent safe place. A home. Parents. She would be their daughter, forever.


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

"What's up, Maur?" Jane asked, entering Maura's home office after coming home from work after a long day.

Maura looked up at Jane with a happy sparkle in her eyes, standing up from her chair to walk around her desk and lean against the edge of it. "I j-... wait." She stood up and reached out her arms to her wife, cupping her face to press a kiss to her lips. "Hi."

Jane smiled, leaning in for a second, deeper kiss. "Hi."

"I just received a call from the research facility center at the fertility hospital we've been," Maura started, sitting back down on the edge of the desk. "They've been busy with new research and found a new technique." Maura's eyes sparkled and her lips curled up into a happy smile. "They can help us get pregnant."

"Wh-…" Jane furrowed her brow and sat down on the couch in Maura's office. "How do you know? How do they know it will work?"

"Because they found a solution to the things that went wrong all the times before. They can use your egg and fertilize it before implantation, but with a different technique. It's quite complicated, but it's likely to work."

Jane sighed. "Maur… We have Anna… We… Do you want to do this?"

Maura looked at her wife for a while before answering. "Yes, I think I do."

"Don't you think Anna is kind of enough?" she asked hesitatingly. "I mean… She's not really a handful like I expected but it's overwhelming enough as it is. I don't want to give her the feeling she's not enough, y'know?"

"I'm not saying I want to do it right now," Maura stated softly. "But… I'd really like a baby of our own."

"Our own?" Jane furrowed her brow and felt anger bubbling in her stomach. "Anna is our own. We adopted her, she's our daughter. You said so yourself!"

"Jane, I didn't mean-…"

"What are you saying?" Jane stood up and ran a hand through her hair. "Anna's not enough for you? You want to go through that excruciating process again just to have a biological child?"

"Please don't get mad," Maura said softly, lowering her eyes as she fumbled with her blouse. "Of course Anna is enough. I love that little girl with all I have. Just imagine how much we would love a second child!"

"I've only been a mother for a few months, Maur! Slow down, will ya?" Jane was pacing through the office, feeling like life was grabbing her by her throat.

"I'm not saying we should try today!"

"I'm not saying I want to try ever!" Jane snapped at her wife and immediately regretted her tone. Tears appeared in hazel eyes as Maura looked at the angry detective. Jane gently approached her wife and took one of her hands in hers. "What if it doesn't work, Maura? I don't want to go through that again. I'm _so_ happy with Anna. So, so happy." Jane sighed deeply and closed her eyes. "I don't need a biological kid."

"It's not about what I need," Maura whispered, looking up at her wife with tears in her eyes. "I just-…" she sighed and wiped her cheek where a tear trickled down. "I imagined a child with unruly curls, just like yours. And dark eyes like yours and your energy and fierceness, and I imagined teaching him or her to love books and science and… That thought made me so happy." She took both of Jane's hands and squeezed gently. "A sibling for Anna. She would be a big sister, taking care of her little brother or sister."

Jane sighed deeply. "I don't know, Maura. I don't want her to feel inferior. Like she's less than our biological kid."

"We won't love her any less."

"But there's like… studies that prove a connection with a baby if a woman carries it and stuff…"

Maura nodded. "That's true. But… Before we got Anna, could you ever imagine loving a child as much as you love her right now?"

Jane shook her head. She could never have imagined.

"You're her mother. It doesn't matter if you carried her or not. It will be the same for a child we did carry."

"Can we park this for a while?" Jane whispered, looking down at their intertwined hands. "Talk about it later so I can process and stuff?"

Maura nodded. "Of course." She stood up and pressed her lips against her wife's for a loving kiss.

"I'm sorry." Jane averted her gaze and rested her forehead against Maura's. "I'm sorry if I hurt you."

Maura closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around Jane's neck. "It's okay."

"No." Jane shook her head. "It's not okay. I reacted stupid."

"You just need time. I shouldn't have dumped this on you like that." Maura untangled one arm from around Jane's neck and cupped her cheek, gently brushing her thumb across her jaw. "There's time. Just… Keep an open mind? Think about it?"

Jane nodded. "I will."

Just when Maura leaned in for another kiss, they heard a door opening upstairs. "Anna's not sleeping yet?" Jane asked, looking at her newly bought watch to see it was pretty late for Anna to be up.

"She was." Maura furrowed her brow and pecked Jane's lips before walking out of her office to see why Anna was up.

The little girl stood at the top of the stairs in her pajamas. "Hi, baby." Jane smiled and walked upstairs. "Why are you up? Couldn't you sleep?"

Anna shook her head. "My belly's hurt."

Maura, immediately alarmed, walked up the stairs and kneeled in front of Anna. "Where does it hurt?"

Anna shrugged. "All of the belly."

Maura placed her hand on Anna's forehead and furrowed her brow before pressing her lips against the girl's head. "You feel warm, honey."

Anna was about to reply but her cheeks suddenly turned paler than the white wall behind her and before the women could do anything, she threw up, emptying her stomach over the floor and partly over Maura.

"Oh, God." Maura placed her hand on Anna's back, waiting until she finished and collapsed in her mother's arms, crying loudly.

"M-mommy…" Anna cried, rubbing her eyes with both her hands as she shook in Maura's arms.

"I know, honey. I know." Maura wrapped her arms tightly around the little girl before looking up at Jane with shimmering eyes. "Can you get a warm shower running?" she whispered.

Jane nodded, swallowing her tears at the sight of her daughter in such discomfort. She hurried towards the bathroom and started the shower, adjusting it to a comfortable temperature. She hurried back and helped Maura and Anna up from the floor, taking the girl from her wife to take her pajama pants off that were partly covered in vomit. She fought back the urge to gag as she threw the pants in the bathtub, along with her sweaty shirt. She looked up to see Maura taking off her ruined skirt and throwing it with Anna's stained pajamas before taking off her blouse and bra.

She took Anna in her arms, the girl nestling closely against Maura's warm skin as she stepped into the warm spray of the shower, gently cleaning the girl. Jane handed them a washcloth, watching Maura's gentle movements with her daughter for a moment before she remembered the vomit that was now staining the floor in the hallway. She sighed deeply and prepared herself to clean it up. This wasn't her favorite part of motherhood.

She cleaned the floor as best as she could, trying her best not to gag from the strong smell. She didn't know what Anna ate, but what was left of it was the worst smell in the world. When she finished, leaving a big wet spot on the floor, she heard the shower turning off and headed back towards the bathroom.

Maura smiled a sad smile when she saw her wife. Anna was nestled into her arms, her head resting in the crook of Maura's neck as her bare legs wrapped around her mother's waist. "Can you take her?" Maura whispered, gently handing Anna to Jane.

Anna let out a soft whimper at the loss of contact with Maura's warm skin, a sound that broke Jane's heart. "C'mon, baby. Let's get you dried off and into some warm clothes." She grabbed a big white towel and wrapped Anna in it, holding the girl securely in her arms. As Maura quickly threw a towel around her shoulders to keep warm, she grabbed another one to dry off Anna's wet blond hair.

Silent tears kept trickling down Anna's cheeks during the entire process of drying off and getting dressed into a clean pair of pajamas and a warm sweater. When they finished, Jane carefully lifted Anna in her arms and kissed the side of her warm head. "Would you like to sleep with me and Mommy tonight?" she whispered.

Anna nodded weakly and allowed Jane to carry her towards their bedroom. She gently put Anna down on the bed while Maura went into the closet to change. Anna kept crying softly and it broke Jane's heart. Her child was in pain. Therefore, she was in pain. She took off her pants, changing it for a pair of comfortable sweatpants and slid off her bra before pulling a sweater over her head.

"Mama…" Anna whined hoarsely from the bed, looking up at her mother with watery eyes.

"I know, baby." Jane caressed Anna's hair and kissed her temple. "Let me get you a bucket in case you have to puke again, okay? I'll be back in a sec."

"No, Mama," Anna tried to sit up, crying louder at the idea of her mother leaving her.

"I'm just running downstairs, baby. I'll be right back."

"I'll go." Maura came out of the closet, zipping up a hoodie over one of Jane's tank tops. "You stay with her." She smiled sadly at her wife before leaving the bedroom to find something that would make sure Anna didn't vomit on the floor again.

"Okay come here then, little peanut," Jane said softly as she slid into bed, pulling up the covers to make sure Anna was warm. The girl snuggled into Jane's side but wasn't satisfied with the warmth she was receiving, so she climbed up on Jane's legs, wiggling in between them as she nuzzled into her mother's front, her thumb sucked into her mouth as she rested sideways on Jane's chest.

"Are you feeling a little better?" Jane whispered, resting her cheek against Anna's warm forehead.

Anna shrugged. "My head's hurting. And the belly too."

Jane sighed deeply as her hand rubbed up and down Anna's back. "I know, baby. You're sick."

"I wants Ted," Anna said as fresh tears sprung to her eyes.

"Hm, let's ask Mommy to get him for you okay?"

"I already did." Maura entered the room with a sweet smile, holding the old teddy bear in her hand as well as a bucket she put next to the bed. She handed Anna the bear and got out a thermometer to measure the girl's temperature.

Anna looked at the device and clung to her bear as she leaned closer against Jane. "No, Mommy."

"This won't hurt, honey. It just goes in your ear like this, so we can know your temperature. You won't feel a thing, I promise." Maura sat on the bed and turned the device on, waiting for it the beep signal that would tell them it was ready to use.

Anna's bottom lip quivered as she cried harder and clutched to Jane's sweater. "It won't hurt, baby," Jane said softly, soothingly rubbing the girl's back. "Mommy's a doctor, remember? She's a very good doctor and she'll never, ever hurt you ever."

Anna squeezed her eyes shut as Maura gently put the thermometer in her ear, waiting for it to beep. The look in Maura's eyes was one of pain and sadness, something Jane hated to see.

Anna sniffled softly and Jane pulled her closer. "It's okay, baby," she whispered. "It's all over." Jane rested her chin on top of Anna's head and looked at her wife. "What's the temperature?"

"100,5." Maura sighed deeply and put the thermometer on the nightstand next to her. "God…" She stood up from the bed and hurried towards the bathroom, coming back with a glass of water. "You should drink something, baby."

Anna shifted to take the water from her mother, but the movement set her stomach off and she started shaking. Jane was just in time to grab the bucket before Anna again vomited into it, her stomach entirely empty now. Jane held Anna's hair back and gently rubbed the girl's back, her heart breaking at the tears on her daughter's pale cheeks. "Shh, calm down, baby," she said softly as Anna kept gagging, "deep breaths."

When she finally finished, she collapsed back into Jane's front, crying softly. Jane brushed her hand through Anna's hair that was plastered to her sweaty forehead while Maura took the bucket to the bathroom.

"Dehydration, norovirus, gastrointestinal, congestion…" She was mumbling as she paced through the room, getting a towel and putting it back, grabbing the glass and putting it back.

"Maur." Jane looked up at her wife and reached out to take her arm. "Calm down."

"Calm? She's sick, Jane!" Maura had tears in her eyes as her voice rose to panic. "She could get dehydrated but if she drinks anything it will upset her stomach and make it worse, and oh, I should have made her have orange juice instead of lemonade. She needs fluids, she-…"

"She needs you," Jane interrupted her wife. "Kids get sick all the time, Maura. We did too when we were little. She's gonna be alright, it's probably just a stomach flu. Tommy said TJ had the flu a week ago." She smiled up at her wife and gently squeezed her hand. "What she needs is her mom."

Maura sighed deeply and averted her gaze towards their little girl. She carefully sat down on the edge of the bed and brushed Anna's sweaty hair back. "My sweet girl…"

"She'll be okay, Maur," Jane whispered, pressing a kiss to her wife's temple. "Her Mommy's the most brilliant doctor in the world."

"I'm a Medical Examiner, Jane." Maura shook her head and dapped her eyes with the sleeve of her hoodie. "I'm not an expert on sick infants."

Jane shrugged. "Still."

Maura sighed and leaned forward to kiss Anna's hot forehead, clearly calming down after her short moment of panic. "I'm getting her some ice chips, so she gets at least some fluids in her body. If her fever doesn't drop within the next ninety minutes, I'll give her a acetaminophen suppository, as unpleasant as that will be."

Jane nodded, happy to hear her wife's calm tone of voice and reasonable plan. "Yeah-… Wait, like a butt pill?"

Maura glared at her wife. "She won't keep anything down and the fever is wearing her out."

Jane sighed and kissed the top of Anna's head. "Let's hope the fever drops then."

Maura nodded and stood up from the bed, but Anna's soft whimper stopped her. "Mommy…? You's gotta stay, Mommy!" The girl looked up at her mother with watery eyes, a truly heartbreaking sight.

Maura smiled sadly and leaned down to press a kiss to Anna's forehead. "I'm just going to get you some ice so you'll feel better, okay? I'll be right back."

Anna nodded and relaxed back into Jane's arms, being absolutely exhausted.

When Maura left the room, Jane grabbed the iPad from the nightstand and opened a video app to start up some kind of cartoon that would get Anna's mind off the discomfort she was feeling.

Maura came back with a few chips of ice in a glass bowl and an extra blanket, as well as a box of medicine just in case. "Here honey, just keep this in your mouth for a while." She gently spooned a chip of ice in Anna's mouth, smiling when the girl wrinkled her nose.

"'S cold…"

"I know, baby." Maura chuckled and slid into bed on the other side, nestling closely against Jane's side as she wrapped one of her arms around Jane's waist and used the other to make soothing strokes on Anna's belly.

"This is what she needs," Jane whispered as she felt her wife's head resting on her shoulder.

Maura sighed. "I know. My doctor-mode just went into overdrive." She snuggled closer against her wife and daughter and lifted her hand to gently caress Anna's cheek. "I hate seeing her like this."

"Yeah." Jane nodded and swallowed a lump in her throat. "Me too."

Anna lowered her thumb from her mouth and averted her gaze from the cartoon on the iPad. "I'm sorry for being sick, Mommies," she said softly, her voice hoarse and weak.

"Oh you don't have to be sorry, sweetheart." Maura tucked a strand of hair behind Anna's ear and smiled at her. "It's not your fault."

"Ahmed says it's bad for the kids if I's sick."

"Well, you might infect the other children. But Mama and I have good immune systems. I'm fairly positive we'll be fine."

Anna furrowed her brow. She didn't understand what her mother just said. "What?"

"It's gonna be fine," Jane said with a smile. "You just get busy about getting better, okay? We'll worry about the rest."

Anna just nodded, relaxing back in Jane's arms with a small shrug. She lowered her bear and absentmindedly fumbled with Maura's fingers on her stomach as she focused back on the cartoon.

Jane looked at her wife and saw those hazel eyes she loved so much filled with sympathy and love as she looked at their daughter. She loved that look on her wife. It was a look she reserved for Anna. There was no one else she loved like she loved Anna.

Anna vomited twice more that evening before Maura decided to give her the painkillers that would drop her fever so she would get some sleep. The girl finally fell into a restless sleep after she shifted in between her mothers and could snuggle into Maura's chest where she moved the hoodie in her sleep so she rested against soft, warm skin. Jane couldn't keep her eyes open and felt herself falling asleep, but she knew Maura would be awake, monitoring Anna throughout the night. It would be a restless night.


	11. Chapter 11

_A/N Sorry for the short chapter and the late update, I have the flu. I hope you like it, please let me know your thoughts and feelings and what else you would like to read!_

Chapter 11

Somehow, Maura fell asleep after hours and hours of worrying and keeping an eye on Anna. Jane fell asleep rather quickly, with Anna in her arms, but Maura couldn't rest. She kept carefully feeling Anna's pulse and placing her hand on the girl's forehead to check her temperature. She kept looking at how Anna's brow furrowed in her sleep, how her breathing quickened as her fever increased and how she restlessly tossed and turned in her mothers' bed.

Maura didn't realize she had fallen asleep until she jolted awake, immediately chastising herself for falling asleep in the first place. She looked at Anna and released her breath when she saw her sleeping in between her mothers, having squirmed off Jane's lap in her sleep. She gently placed her hand on Anna's forehead and felt a slight raise in temperature compared to when she fell asleep, but it wasn't too alarming. She sighed and closed her eyes, feeling a headache coming up behind her eyes.

"Maur…" Jane's husky voice pulled her out of her thoughts and she shot her attention towards her wife, only now noticing she was awake.

"I didn't mean to wake you," Maura whispered quietly.

Jane shook her head. "You didn't." She gently placed her hand on Anna's cheek, feeling her sweaty hot skin. "She'll be okay, Maura."

Maura sighed. "She's sleeping, that's a good sign."

"It's just the flu. She'll get better soon."

"I hope so." Maura closed her eyes and pressed a soft kiss on Anna's forehead, careful not to wake the sleeping girl.

"Try to get some more sleep, Maur," Jane whispered as she slowly reached over to caress her wife's cheek.

Maura shook her head no, but Jane stopped her. "Yes. I'll stay awake to keep an eye on her if that makes you feel better." Jane smiled. "You might be the doctor in the family but you don't have to make her better all by yourself, Maura."

Maura looked into her wife's dark eyes, seeing them sparkling with love in the darkness of the bedroom. She felt how exhausted she was, both mentally and physically, and nodded. She closed her eyes and gently pulled Anna in her arms, kissing her sweaty forehead before allowing herself to drift off to sleep.

When she woke up, she heard sounds coming from the bathroom and shot up in bed when she heard the toilet flush and her daughter crying. "Anna?" She hurried towards the bathroom and saw Jane holding Anna on her hip as she handed her a cup of water.

"Don't swallow it, honey," Maura said, her voice still hoarse from sleeping. "Spit it out after rinsing so you don't upset your stomach."

Anna nodded against Jane's neck and lazily sipped the water before she lowered her to the sink so she could spit it back. "Taste gross, Mama," Anna whimpered quietly.

"I know, baby." Jane kissed Anna's head and pulled her closer. "You wanna go downstairs? Get the fire going, watch some TV?"

Anna shook her head as she cried softly, causing both her mothers to get tears in their eyes. "I just wanna be better…"

"Oh I know sweetheart." Maura rubbed her eyes and brushed Anna's hair back. "How about a story?"

Anna looked at her mother with watery eyes and nodded her head.

During that day, Anna slowly got a bit better. She hadn't vomited since early that morning and her fever decreased. Both women stayed home from work, and Maura fell even more in love with her wife when she saw how content she was and how easily she called in sick for work. The old Jane Rizzoli couldn't be kept at home in any way, but the new Jane Rizzoli, mother to Anna, would do anything to make her little girl feel better.

Anna managed to keep a small amount of chicken soup down for lunch, which relieved Maura to no end. There was something in her body again.

"Look guys, it's really coming down now!" Jane stood in front of the window, looking at the rain that was pouring down. There was a pretty big storm hitting Boston and it had been raining all morning.

Maura smiled and lifted Anna up from the dinner table, settling the girl on her hip as she stood next to her wife to look outside, seeing the rain washing over the streets. "Oh my goodness." Maura gasped. "Let's hope the basement will keep it dry…"

Jane smirked. "Yeah. Or we can make it into a swimming pool, how's that sound Anna?"

Anna giggled and lazily put one of her arms around Maura's neck, using the other to suck on her thumb. Maura smiled at the adorable sight and looked up to see Jane's sparkling eyes.

Jane reached up to caress Anna's cheek, staring at her own hand while doing so. "Let's have another one," she whispered, barely audible.

"What?"

"Let's have another one." Jane smiled and looked into her wife's eyes. "I want to have a baby with you."

Maura felt her heart swelling with love, tears burning in her eyes as her lips curled into a happy smile. "Yes." She let out a happy laugh and leaned forward to press her lips against her wife's. "Let's have another one." She pulled back and rested her forehead against Jane's.

"Just not right now, okay? Let's wait until this one gets better first," Jane smiled as she caressed Anna's warm cheek. "And then a while longer."

Maura nodded. "Please. I'm still getting used to this lovely sweetheart." She closed her eyes and rested her head against her daughter's, the girl unaware of their conversation as she stared out of the window.

Anna wore a small smile on her face. She was sensitive to other people's pain, but she also felt their happiness. It all affected her. Maura pressed her lips against Anna's still warm forehead, trying to determine her temperature. The fever was back, but Anna's stomach was still calm.

Suddenly Anna chuckled quietly. "Look Mommy," she pointed at the street where a boy was walking with his dog, jumping in the puddles while managing to hold his umbrella above his head. The large dog was happily bouncing around the boy.

Maura smiled. "Well, at least someone is enjoying the weather."

"I'm kind of enjoying it too, actually," Jane said softly, looking back and forth from her wife and daughter to the window.

Maura chuckled and captured Jane's lips in a loving kiss. "Fancy a walk in the rain then?"

Jane smirked but shook her head. "Nah. Too warm and cozy inside." She gently wrapped her arms around Anna to pull her in an embrace. "And this peanut needs to get better before we can get to any adventures!"

Anna giggled quietly and allowed her mother to settle the girl on her hip. "Can we does one more story, Mama?"

Jane pursed her lips and pretended to think about that for a second before she smiled and put Anna back on the floor. "Of course. Go pick one."

Anna tried to hurry towards the bookshelf but she was too weak on her legs, causing Maura to gasp. "Oh baby be careful!" She gently took Anna's hand and steadied her. "Your body is too weak for running."

"I wants the story of Peter Pan," the girl said softly.

Maura lifted Anna up so she could reach the book, allowing her to grab the book herself. "Thanks, Mommy." The girl smiled politely as she headed back to the couch, climbing up on it and waiting for Jane to sit next to her.

Maura busied herself with the reports she needed to finish that day, meanwhile being soothed by the familiar sound of her wife's husky voice. Jane's voice would always be her favorite sound in the world. It could be growling, low and dangerous but it could also be so filled with love and care. That husky, sweet sound would never fail to make her heart flutter. She watched her wife treating Anna with so much care and love, her movements slow and gentle, her eyes filled with a loving sparkle.

Maura smiled to herself as she tried to get her focus back, but her mind kept drifting off to Jane saying she wanted to have a baby. They would try to get pregnant. Not because Anna wasn't enough. Far from it. Anna had stolen their hearts and they would never get it back. The minute she came into their lives, something changed within the two women. Not only did they become mothers, they became different people. That little girl became the center of their lives.

It was hard to grasp. It felt like the girl had taken a part of their hearts to keep for herself. A part of Maura's heart was now reserved for Anna and that would never change. Maura knew it. Anna would grow up, get older, become a teen, an adult. But that place in their hearts would never change. She felt it every time Anna looked her with those awfully gorgeous eyes. She felt it every time Anna called her 'Mommy', every time she refused to eat her vegetables or when she made a mess of her clothes and everything within a three-foot radius around her. But that was the thing about being a mother. It didn't matter. It wouldn't matter if Anna screwed up, made mistakes or disappoint them. They would love her no matter what, and at all times. The love of a mother was unconditional and without question. It was infinite. Endless.


	12. Chapter 12

_A/N I'm going to take some time jumps with this story, so it won't get boring, hopefully. Thank you all for your kind reviews, it means a lot to me!_

Chapter 12

"C'mon Frost, you know Jane's gotta take it easy. She's got to go home to that little munchkin!" Korsak smirked and lifted his beer, nodding at Jane who just denied the offer of a stronger drink while they sat at the Dirty Robber.

Jane chuckled, swirling her beer through the bottle.

Frost smiled at his partner. "How's she doing?"

"She's doing great." Jane took a sip of her beer.

"How long has she been with you now?"

"Almost a year." Jane grinned proudly and brushed her hand through her hair, feeling exhausted but satisfied after they just closed a difficult case. "Time's flying, she's gonna be four soon."

"Jeez, four?" Korsak raised his eyebrows. "Small kid, isn't she?"

Jane slapped his arm. "Watch it, old man. That's my kid you're talking about."

Korsak faked pain but showed a small smile as he took a sip of his drink. "She doing okay in preschool?"

Jane nodded. "Yeah… Kind of. She's only going twice a week and she still spends two mornings with my Ma. That's the most she can take, I'm afraid." She fumbled with her beer. "But she's doing great."

"She's a sweet kid." Frost nodded his head at his colleague. "You and the doc are doing a great job with her."

"Thanks." Jane smirked and just thought of a clever joke when her phone buzzed in her pocket. She took it out and saw her wife's smile looking up at her from the screen. "Hi, Maur."

"Jane, are you at the Dirty Robber?" Maura sounded hurried and a little out of order. Not as put together as her usual self.

"Yeah, is something wrong? Are you okay?"

"Yes-… Yes, can you come home please?"

Jane furrowed her brow. "What's wrong, Maur? Is Anna okay?"

"Everything is fine, Jane. I promise. Just come home, okay?"

"Okay…" Jane put her beer down and grabbed her keys. "I'm on my way." She hung up the phone and put it back in her pocket. "I uhm… I gotta go."

"Something wrong?" Frost furrowed his brow.

Jane shrugged, showing a small smile as she put on her jacket. "I don't think so, I'm not sure. I'll let you know."

Korsak nodded. "Say hi to Maura."

"I will." Jane smiled at her colleagues, threw some money on the table for her drinks and headed out, hurrying towards her car. She drove home as fast as she could, trying her best not to break too much speed limits in her cop car.

When she arrived home, the house seemed empty. "Maura?"

"Upstairs!"

"Where's Anna?" Jane hurried upstairs, throwing her jacket and keys on the kitchen counter as she passed it.

"With your mother, she'll be home soon." Maura's voice came from the bathroom.

Jane entered and saw her wife standing with her back to her, her shoulders pulled up to her ears like she did when she was nervous. "Maura…"

Maura turned around and Jane was surprised to see happiness edged on her face. A strange kind of happiness, mixed with fear. Maura didn't say anything and just took Jane's hand in hers, leading her towards the sink.

Jane furrowed her brow, looking at her wife first before turning her attention towards the sink. She saw three white sticks and didn't understand what was happening at first until she saw two red stripes in the middle. Pregnancy tests. No. Positive pregnancy tests. Her eyes widened and she gasped as she looked at her wife, seeing tears in hazel eyes. "A-Are you sure?"

Maura nodded as a happy tear trickled down her cheek. "Yes."

Jane shook her head, completely baffled for a second before she threw her arms around Maura's waist and lifted her wife into the air. Maura laughed and wrapped her legs around Jane's waist, allowing her to spin her around.

"We're having a baby." Maura pulled back and looked into her wife's eyes. "A baby!"

Jane nodded and tried her best to ignore the burning tears in her eyes. "We're having a baby."

"We are," Maura whispered, tangling one of her hands in Jane's curls. She pressed her lips against her wife's in a fierce, loving kiss. They waited for a while after they found out a new treatment was possible before they tried again. They never expected it to work on the first try.

"That's so scary," Jane said softly as they broke the kiss.

Maura nodded as she rested her forehead against her wife's. "Yes."

"You're gonna be so beautiful," she smiled at the beautiful blonde in her arms and pecked her lips. "I can't wait for you to swell up like an elephant so I can take care of you and love you even more than I do now, even though I think that might be impossible."

"Oh Jane." Maura chuckled and pressed her lips against her wife's. The kiss heated up after only a second until the front door opened and Angela's voice called out to them.

"Can we wait a bit to tell her? Keep it to ourselves to enjoy it for now?" Jane smiled at the beautiful doctor in her arms as she put her down on the floor in the bathroom.

Maura nodded. "Yes. I think we should wait until the first twelve weeks anyway," she said softly. "To make sure nothing goes wrong." She sighed and her expression dropped at the idea of anything going wrong. "Most miscarriages happen in the first three months…"

"It'll work this time, Maur," Jane whispered. "I feel it."

Maura smiled up at her wife and nodded, her eyes sparkling again. "God, I hope so."

"But can we tell Anna first?" Jane asked. "Before we tell my Ma… I can't wait to see her face when we tell her she's going to be a big sister."

"Yes." Maura chuckled, kissed her wife's lips one more time and walked out of the bathroom to greet her mother and her daughter.

As soon as Anna saw her mother, her face lit up with a sweet smile and she ran towards her. "Mama!"

Jane smiled at her beautiful girl and opened her arms to lift Anna up in the air. "Hi, peanut!"

Anna's short arms wrapped around her mother's neck, Jane pressing kisses to the side of her head. "Did you have fun this morning?"

Anna nodded and untangled herself when she saw Maura entering the living room. She smiled at her other mother and reached out her arms towards the blonde. "Mommy."

Maura smiled lovingly and cupped Anna's face to kiss her cheek. "Hello, pretty girl."

"Girls I gotta go," Angela smiled at them and zipped up her coat. "She already had lunch, her stuff is in her bag." She quickly headed towards them to kiss her daughters cheek and to caress Anna's blond hair.

"Thank you, Angela."

Angela waved her hand and shook her head. "Happy to help. Bye girls!"

Jane furrowed her brow. "Why's she in such a hurry?"

Maura shrugged and gently took Anna from Jane's arm to hug her to her front. "I have no idea." She smiled at her wife before closing her eyes, her face simply glowing with happiness. Angela's activities were very far off her mind right now. "How about homemade pizza for dinner?" she asked, pulling back to look at Anna.

Anna's lips curled up into a happy smile while she nodded. "Yeah."

Jane felt her heart filling with unconditional love as she watched her wife tucking a strand of hair behind Anna's ear, hazel eyes filled with love and happiness. Maura pressed a kiss to Anna's forehead. "How was your day with Grandma?"

Anna shrugged and leaned forward to hide herself in her mother's neck. "Good."

Jane caressed Anna's back before she headed towards the kitchen to prepare some coffee. "What did you do, Anna?"

"Grandma reads me one story and I plays with the dolls."

"Oh Grandma spoils you with all her stories!" Maura chuckled and kissed Anna's cheek before putting her down at one of the stools at the kitchen counter.

Anna looked up at her mother and furrowed her brow, looking curious. "Why's you so happy, Mommy?"

Maura smiled and shrugged her shoulders. "I'm just happy."

"Why? Did Mama reads you stories too?"

Jane laughed. "Yeah, I read really good stories."

Anna started to chuckle but her smile fell when she realized her mother wasn't honest with her. "You don't read Mommy stories."

"No, she doesn't." Maura took a cup of tea from her wife and gave her a quick kiss. "Unfortunately."

Jane smirked. She looked at Anna and saw that the girl was still looking expectantly at them. She sighed. "Why don't we just tell her?" she whispered at her wife. "You can't lie and she'll notice something's going on."

Maura sighed deeply and looked at the little girl at the counter. "I don't know… What if it goes wrong?"

"We'll tell her that too." Jane shrugged. "She'll notice anyway. Nothing goes past her, you know that."

"That's true…" Maura nodded and pursed her lips in thought for a while. "Okay."

Jane smiled and pressed a quick kiss to her wife's lips. "Anna?"

"Yeah?" Anna straightened her back, sensing that she was about to get the latest news.

Jane sat next to her daughter and felt Maura's hand on her shoulders as she stood behind her. "We're… Well... Mommy," she looked up at Maura and smiled, "Mommy's pregnant."

Anna furrowed her brow.

"We're going to have a baby."

Light grey eyes widened in surprise and happiness, Anna's mouth falling open. "A real baby?"

"Yes," Maura chuckled. "A real baby."

"There's a baby growing in Mommy's belly and it needs to grow for a really long time but next year, you're going to be a big sister."

"A sister?" Anna gasped and sat up on her knees. "I's gonna has a sister?" 

Maura smiled at Anna's beautiful smile. "Or a brother. You're going to _be_ a big sister. You're going to _get_ a baby brother or sister."

"Y'know, just like the dolls, only real." Jane gently caressed Anna's cheek. "And louder. And smellier."

Maura laughed and wrapped her arms around Jane's chest from behind, placing a kiss on her temple. "And so much better."

"Is't gonna be boy or a girl?" Anna asked, her brain still working overdrive to understand the concept of pregnancy.

"We don't know yet." Maura untangled herself from her wife and stepped in between Anna and Jane to brush her hand through Anna's blond hair.

Anna nodded and looked down at Maura's still flat stomach that was clad in a pencil skirt with a blue blouse tucked into it. "Is it in your belly?" Anna furrowed her brow, slightly mortified by the idea of a baby in someone's stomach.

Maura placed her hands on her stomach and smiled lovingly. "Yes. But it's still very small."

"Mommy's gonna get reeeeaal fat soon!" Jane smirked and lifted Anna off her chair, swinging her through the air before settling her on her hip.

Anna giggled. "Mommy's not fat."

"The baby's gonna make her fat, you'll see." Jane smirked and kissed her daughter's temple. "But only her belly. And she's gonna be prettier and prettier everyday."

Anna nodded in agreement. "Mommy's the prettiest."

"Hm." Jane nodded and cupped her wife's face to press her lips against her blushing cheek. "I agree."

Maura's cheeks reddened further and she averted her gaze towards her feet, eliciting a sweet chuckle from her wife. "You're adorable."

"Stop it." Maura laughed and shook her head. "I love you." She kissed Jane's smiling lips before turning to kiss Anna's forehead. "And I love you too."

"When's the baby gonna come?" Anna asked, her mind still occupied with Maura's pregnancy.

"Oh not for a very long time."

Anna furrowed her brow and wiggled in Jane's arms to pull the watch out of her pocket. "When the big one goes around all the way?"

Maura chuckled. "No, honey. It will be… After your birthday and then a few more months. So, a very long time."

"Oh." Anna's facial expression dropped and she wiggled the watch back into the pocket of her skirt. She still held on to it whenever she was away from her mothers. It comforted her. The girl wasn't as afraid as she was when they first adopted her, but she was shy at nature.

"That way," Maura said softly, "we have enough time to prepare."

"Why?"

"Well, we need to make a baby room, just like we did with your room before you got here."

"But I wasn't a baby." Anna lifted her head from Jane's shoulder to look at Maura. "Why wasn't I a baby?"

Jane sighed. This question would come up someday, she knew. She just didn't know if she was ready to explain. "You were a baby, just not with me and Mommy."

"Where was I a baby?"

"Well…" Maura smiled nervously and brushed Anna's hair back. "Someone else gave birth to you, and then you went to the adoption center. You know, with the other kids, before Mama and I adopted you."

"Oh…" Anna shifted comfortably on Jane's hip. "Why'd you and Mama pick me?"

"Because you were the most adorable kid!" Jane smirked and kissed her daughter's temple.

Anna giggled. "Am not!"

"We picked you because you were in need of a home and because we loved you from the first second we met you." Maura looked lovingly at their little girl. "So we wanted to be your mommies."

"You's good mommies." Anna nodded and squirmed free from Jane's arm, signaling that the conversation was over. "Can I makes a drawing for the baby?"

Jane smiled. "Yeah, baby. I think the baby's gonna love that." She put Anna on the floor and watched her hurrying towards the closet to get out some paper and pencils.

Maura's arms wrapped back around her wife's chest from behind, her lips pressing lazy kisses across her jaw and neck. Jane leaned back into the embrace and closed her eyes at the lovely feel of her wife so close against her. "I love you, Maur," she whispered.

"I love you too." Maura rested her cheek against Jane's temple.

Jane smirked and opened her eyes to turn her head and look into sparkling hazel eyes. "We're having a baby."


	13. Chapter 13

Chapter 13

Maura groaned as she let herself fall on the couch. She was exhausted. No. Beyond exhausted. She had no idea it was possible to be this tired. Morning sickness kept her from sleeping more than a few hours every night and emotional breakdowns happened too frequently to her liking. Her back hurt, even though her baby bump was only a third of the size it would be eventually.

She closed her eyes and rested her head back against the couch, a headache pounding behind her eyes, her muscles hurting. She was just tired, that's what she kept telling herself. She read every single pregnancy book she could find and she knew exactly what her body was going through, but she didn't expect to be this exhausted. She had to cut down her hours at work because she had trouble keeping her eyes open while doing autopsies. The smell of dead bodies suddenly made her vomit and difficult cases made it impossible to be professional and not get emotional. She was a disaster.

Tears burned behind her closed eyelids and she lifted her hand to cover her eyes. She was a mess.

Suddenly the front door opened and Maura furrowed her brow. She was too exhausted to entertain her almost four-year old. Jane and Anna walked in and she opened her eyes to show a tired smile. "Hello, my darlings."

"Mommy!" Anna smiled and headed off towards her mother, climbing on the couch but pouting when Maura didn't pull her into her lap like she normally did. "Mommy?"

"I'm sorry baby, Mommy's so tired." Maura smiled at her little girl and opened her arms to pull her in for a sweet hug. "Did you have fun with Mama at the market?"

Anna nodded but her brow was furrowed as she noticed her mother's discomfort. "Is you in pain, Mommy?"

Maura shook her head and managed a small smile. "I'm just tired." She tucked a strand of loose hair behind Anna's ear and chuckled. "Did Mama try to do a braid again this morning?"

"Yah." Anna nestled into Maura's side, her head resting on her mother's chest.

Maura smiled and smoothed the messy strands of hair that were supposed to stay into a braid.

"Hey, I tried." Jane smirked and walked towards the back of the couch after putting the groceries away. She brushed her hand through her wife's perfectly styled curls and kissed her lips. "You okay, babe?"

Maura sighed. "Yes."

"You don't look so okay." Jane furrowed her brow and walked around the couch to sit next to her wife. "What's wrong?"

"I'm just exhausted." Maura closed her eyes and wrapped one of her arms around Anna against her side. "I'll be fine once I get a full night sleep."

Jane hummed and pressed a kiss to her wife's lips. "Want some tea?"

Maura nodded, showing a grateful smile. "Please."

"The gross green matchu thing?"

"Matcha. Yes, thank you." Maura chuckled and pressed a kiss on the top of Anna's head. "Did Mama buy the bad cereal again?" she whispered into Anna's ear.

Anna giggled and put her hands in front of her mouth as she shook her head. "Can't say."

"Oh she did, didn't she?" Maura smiled tiredly and pulled her little girl closer against her side, closing her eyes again as she felt the painful exhaustion in her muscles.

After a few moments of silence where Anna silently played with her doll against her mother's side, Jane put a steaming cup of tea on the coffee table in front of Maura, as well as a cup of juice for Anna. She sat next to her wife and placed a sweet kiss on her temple.

"Hey," she whispered. "I have an idea."

"Hm?" Maura opened her eyes and turned her head against the back of the couch, looking into those dark eyes she loved so much.

"How about we go away for a few days?" Jane asked softly, showing a loving smile. "Just the three of us. I was thinking maybe that cabin we went to on our first anniversary, y'know in the woods, the one that's like two hours away?"

Maura smiled at the memory of that lovely anniversary trip. She smiled even brighter at the idea of taking the same trip again, this time with their beautiful daughter. "That's a lovely idea, Jane."

"Yeah? I was thinking we take a few days off next week and take the weekend with it." Jane smiled at her wife and lovingly tucked Maura's golden hair back. "No phones. No internet. No work. Just us."

Maura nodded and felt tears in her eyes due to those damn pregnancy hormones. She shook her head, laughed and leaned in to capture Jane's lips in a loving kiss. "I would love that."

"Hear that, peanut?" Jane asked as she pulled away from her wife to look at Anna. "We're going on a trip next week!"

"Really?" Anna's eyes widened as her lips curled up into a big smile.

"Yep. To a real cute small house in the woods not too far from here."

"With who?"

"Just Mommy and you and me." Jane smiled and reached over to pinch Anna's cheek.

"Yeah!" Anna smiled and bounced on her seat in excitement.

"Wait," Maura furrowed her brow, "we can't possibly arrange the cabin on such short notice. And I haven't given my two-weeks notice for a vacation at work!"

Jane blushed and averted her gaze, fumbling with the hem of her shirt. "I uhm… I may have already pulled some strings."

"Jane…" Maura shook her head but couldn't help a sweet smile from curling her lips. "You should've discussed it with me."

"Yeah but than you would've said it wasn't necessary and stuff."

Maura chuckled. "Probably, yes."

"So, this way we're gonna take a trip and enjoy just being us." Jane pressed her lips against Maura's temple again, this time letting the kiss linger for a moment.

"Thank you," Maura breathed out, closing her eyes at her wife's lovely touch. "I can't wait."

Jane had arranged everything. Cavanaugh had already been notified that the women would take an early weekend that week and the cabin had been arranged. So the next week, Maura was holding Anna's hand as they dragged their stuff into the small house in the middle of the woods. There would be no people around for miles and they just had the company of the trees, the spring-air, squirrels and each other. The small house stood on a slight hill, so the view as breathtakingly beautiful. It had two bedrooms, one big one and one rather small one, but Anna didn't need much. The living room was cozy and romantic and the whole thing was just perfect.

"Look guys," Jane smiled as she dropped their bag and pointed at the window. "Two squirrels."

"Where?" Anna sprinted off towards her mother and allowed Jane to lift her into the air to reach the window. "They's so fluffy!"

Maura chuckled and put the bag with Anna's dolls on the floor next to the door before she joined her wife and daughter.

"Can I has one, Mama?" Anna looked up at her mother with expecting grey eyes.

"Squirrels aren't pets, baby. They live in the woods." Jane kissed the side of Anna's head and put her back down on the floor.

Anna accepted that statement and headed off to put get out her dolls and teddy bear. She was allowed to bring two dolls, a few spare dresses and their beds. She would bring the whole collection if she could, which rapidly expanded ever since Maura Isles became her mother and found out how much her little girl loved gifts for her dolls.

Maura wrapped her arms around Jane's waist and rested her head on her wife's shoulder, smiling when she felt a strong arm wrapping around her shoulders and a warm hand on her growing belly. "I love you Jane," she whispered as she placed a kiss on her wife's jaw. "Thank you for this."

Jane smirked and turned her head to press her lips against her wife's in a deep, loving kiss. She grazed Maura's soft lips with her tongue and Maura moaned at the lovely taste of her wife, tangling her hands in dark curls as the kiss deepened. Strong, scarred hands caressed her sides and back as they kept her close and safe, like they always did. When they broke apart, Jane's forehead rested against Maura's and they smiled at each other, overwhelmed by familiar love.

"How do you get more beautiful everyday?" Maura whispered, combing her fingers through messy curls, admiring her wife's sharp cheekbones, pink cheeks, dark eyes and gorgeous smile.

Jane smirked, a slight blush reddening her cheeks. "It's a skill."

Maura chuckled and shook her head. "Oh yes of course."

"Mommy where's my other dolly?" Anna asked as she looked through the bag on the floor.

"Oh it might be in the suitcase," Maura replied as she untangled herself from her wife and stepped towards her little girl. She helped Anna find her favorite doll as Jane went into the kitchen to get something to drink.

A few minutes later, Maura was sitting on the front porch, enjoying the watery sun shining on her face as her hands rested on her pregnant belly. The baby wasn't big enough to move yet, but Maura sensed him or her in there. She knew it wasn't possible, but she did. There was a tiny human being inside of her and she already loved that human being with all her heart.

When she heard small footsteps on the wooden floor, she opened her eyes and smiled as she saw Anna walking towards her, holding her bear against her chest. "Hi, baby. Where's Mama?"

"She's gonna put the stuffs away." Anna used her hands to uncross Maura's leg, eliciting a sweet chuckle before she climbed into her mother's lap, snuggling into warm arms.

"Hm." Maura kissed the top of Anna's head and pulled her close. It was getting harder. Her belly was getting bigger and soon she wouldn't be able to hold Anna like this. She loved being pregnant, but she hated that it got harder to be physically close to her wife and daughter. "Did you have something to drink?"

"Yah."

"Did you finish your drink?"

Anna snuggled into her mother's chest, signaling that the answer to that question was 'no'. The girl was very bad at finishing her drinks and food.

Maura chuckled. "Go finish it, honey."

Anna sighed and slid off her mother's lap, taking her bear with her as she headed inside to grab her drink. After only a short moment, she came back with a juice box in her hand and climbed back into Maura's lap.

"Oh my sweet cuddlebug." Maura laughed and brushed Anna's hair back.

Anna took a sip of her juice and wiggled in her mother's lap to get comfortable against her growing belly. "Mommy?"

"Hm?"

"Was I in your belly too?"

"No, sweetheart." Maura sighed and continued her soothing strokes on Anna's back. "You were in someone else's belly."

"Who?"

Her brow furrowed as she thought deeply. How would she tell her daughter that her biological mother died during childbirth? How could a three-year old possibly understand that? "You were in the belly of a very beautiful woman that loved you very much. She was from Russia and she was named Alexandra."

Anna lifted her head from Maura's chest and looked at her with wide eyes. "Alexandra?"

Maura nodded, sweetly caressing the girl's cheek. "Yes."

"Where's she?"

She sighed deeply and furrowed her brow. "She's not with us anymore."

"Where'd she go?"

Maura felt a lump in her throat and tried to swallow it as tears filled her eyes.

"To heaven." Jane suddenly walked onto the porch and sat in the chair next to her wife and daughter. "She passed away, and she left you with us."

A relieved smile curled Maura's lips as she looked at her wife. It wasn't entirely true. Anna spent the first year-and-a-half of her life with another couple before they gave her up, but she had a steady home now.

Anna furrowed her brow, looking intently at Jane. "Why?"

Jane sighed. "She was sick."

"Oh." Anna's expression dropped and she rested back against Maura's chest. "Is you and Mommy gonna be sick too?"

"No, baby." Jane brushed Anna's hair out of her face and smiled at the beautiful girl. "We're gonna stay around for a really long time."

"We're not going anywhere, honey," Maura said softly as she kissed the top of Anna's head. "You're stuck with us forever and ever."

Anna giggled quietly. "'Kay."

Maura looked at her wife, resting her chin on top of Anna's head as she stared into deep brown eyes that sparkled with love. Tears burned in her eyes and she swallowed hard to get rid of them. Her hormones were in overdrive. Or, her happiness was in overdrive. She couldn't feel the difference. With her beautiful little girl in her lap, the love of life next to her, the sun shining on her face, the scent of crisp, forest air… Life seemed pretty perfect.

That same night, Anna sat nestled against Maura's side on the couch in the living room, her thumb sucked into her mouth as she listened intently to the story her mother was reading as the rain quietly clattered against the windows.

"If you believe in courage and kindness and occasionally, just a little bit… of magic." Maura ended quietly before closing the book in her lap, eliciting a deep sigh from her daughter. She chuckled and brushed her hand through blond hair.

"Is magic real, Mommy?" Anna looked up at her mother with big grey eyes.

Maura smiled. "No, honey. Unfortunately not. But love is. And I think love is a kind of magic."

"Really?" The girl lowered her thumb and her eyed widened.

"Oh, yes." Maura nodded.

"Can love gives me a beautiful dress like Cinderella?"

Maura chuckled. "Not like the Fairy Godmother did. But love can make you just as happy as Cinderella was with the prince."

Anna nodded and leaned back into Maura's side with a content smile. "I wanna find a prince too."

"You will, one day."

"Not for a while though!" Jane said as she entered the living room after taking a shower. "She's not dating until she's twenty, Maur."

"Twenty?" Maura laughed and looked at her wife, dressed in a T-shirt and sweatpants, her wet curls dripping on her back. "She's too pretty to keep away from boys until her twenties, Jane."

Jane smirked. "Yeah, I was afraid of that." She shook her head and walked towards the couch. "C'mon, bedtime peanut!"

"One more story?" Anna pouted and showed her mother the look that she knew very well would bring them to the edge of giving in.

Jane chuckled. "No way, Mommy already read you two today!" She lifted Anna off the couch and over the back of it. "It's time for bed. Tomorrow's gonna be a fun day."

"Why?"

"Just because." Jane shrugged and tucked Anna's hair back. "Vacation days are always fun, aren't they?"

Anna nodded and rested her head on Jane's shoulder in exhaustion, eliciting a chuckle from the brunette. "Bed."

"Hold on," Maura reached out her arms for the little girl, turning in her seat, "kiss."

Anna leaned down to give her mother a kiss before allowing Jane to take her upstairs.

It only took Jane a few minutes to put the girl to bed. She was exhausted. Maura smiled lovingly when she saw her wife coming down the stairs. "She's absolutely blossoming here," she said softly. "She's so comfortable."

Jane nodded but she didn't seem to listen to the words Maura said. "Jane?" Maura furrowed her brow and shifted on the couch to look at her wife.

"You know what day it is today?"

"Ehh… Thursday?"

Jane smirked, walking around the couch to sit on the coffee table in front of the blonde. "Yeah, that too."

"What is it?"

"We passed twelve weeks."

"No we didn't, that's next week!"

"Yeah, pregnancy brain." Jane chuckled and looked into her wife's eyes. "I just checked. Yesterday was exactly twelve weeks. Today we passed it."

Maura's eyes widened. She gasped and put her hand in front of her mouth. "Are you serious?"

Jane simply nodded, her eyes shimmering with happiness. "Yep."

"I-… I must've counted wrong… I thought…."

"Hey." Jane cupped Maura's face with both her hands and looked deeply into her eyes. "You know what this means, right?"

Maura nodded. "It- It means there's still a lot that can go wrong, but… Twelve weeks… We can start telling everybody. Oh! Oh, your mother will be so happy!" Maura's face lit up with a bright, loving smile and she scooted towards the edge of the couch. "She will be so happy!"

Jane chuckled. "So will you, I hope."

Maura could only nod. She wiped a tear from her cheek and threw her arms around Jane's neck, squeezing her into a tight hug. "I love you," she whispered through the lump in her throat. "I'm so happy and I love you so much."

Jane smirked and nuzzled into her wife's curls that were a bit messier than normal, but even more beautiful. "I love you too, Maur," she mumbled. "You and the baby. And Anna. I love you."


	14. Chapter 14

Chapter 14

"God Jane, it hurts!" Maura groaned loudly as another contraction wrecked her body.

"I know, honey. I know." Jane kept her hands firmly on her wife's back where the nurse had showed her to keep pressure to relieve some of the pain. But it wasn't enough. Ten hours of labor, no baby. Maura was two weeks late and the past weeks had been hell. She was in constant pain, she was intensely uncomfortable and crying uncontrollably. Jane hated it. The normally put together, rational doctor was a mess of tears and pain. She wanted to take it away. If she could take the pain away and feel it herself, she would do so in a heartbeat. But all she could do was be with her wife, whisper soothing words of love and not leave her side for a second too long.

"I can't do this," Maura whimpered as she fell back against the cushions of the hospital bed. "I c-can't…"

"You can." Jane brushed some hair out of Maura's sweaty face and grabbed the damp washcloth from the nightstand, pressing it carefully against her forehead. "You're doing amazing, Maur. I'm so proud of you."

Maura shook her head as tears formed in her eyes.

"Yeah." Jane nodded and pressed her lips against her wife's sweaty temple, feeling the blonde trembling next to her. She sighed and carefully moved her over as she quickly slid in behind her, wrapping her arms around Maura's chest from behind.

Maura sighed deeply and rested back into Jane's arms, one of her hands resting on her pregnant belly, the other tangling with Jane's on her chest. "I just want it to be over," she whispered hoarsely.

"I know." Jane nuzzled into Maura's frizzy blond hair. "Before you know it, we'll be holding our beautiful baby in our arms. It'll be over soon."

"I'm only dilated four or five centimeters, Jane."

"Yeah, isn't that enough for a baby?" Jane smirked against her wife. "Let's just start pushing that kid out so we're done with it."

Maura let out a sad chuckle. "Jane."

"How big can a baby be?"

Maura shook her head, closing her eyes as she rested her temple against Jane's cheek. "Too big to push out of my vagina," she said, her voice suddenly fearful.

"Maur." Jane pulled her wife closer. "You're a doctor, you've been studying pregnancy, giving birth and babies for years ever since we tried to get pregnant. You know you can do it. Women are made for it, aren't they?"

Maura nodded weakly.

"And you are the strongest woman I've ever known. Pushing a kid out? That's peanuts!" Jane smiled as she heard a soft chuckle from her wife. "You can do it. I know you can. You're going to get through this and you're going to give us the most beautiful baby on the planet."

Before Maura could answer, another contraction started wrecking her body. She groaned and leaned forward, allowing Jane to press on the muscles in her back as she let her head fall down, squeezing her eyes shut to get through the pain.

When the contraction subsided, she slumped back against her wife, silent tears trickling down her cheeks. At the sight of those tears, Jane felt her throat closing up, her chest tightening. "You're so brave, Maur," she whispered huskily, "you're so amazing, so strong and so beautiful. I'm so proud to be your wife. We're going to have the most beautiful baby in the world, thanks to you."

Maura wasn't listening. She was crying silently as the pain slowly left her system. She took a deep, shuttering breath and wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. "Jane?"

"Hm?"

"Could you get me some ice chips?"

"Of course." Jane kissed her wife's head and carefully slid out of the bed. "I'll be back as soon as I can."

"Give Anna a kiss from me, okay?" Maura smiled a sweet, tired smile as she mentioned their four-year old. "Tell her I'm alright."

Jane nodded, tears burning in her eyes. Maura was in a world of pain but she would never let her daughter know that. Anna would worry too much. "I will." Jane smiled and hurried towards the waiting room where her mother, Anna and Frankie were anxiously waiting for hours now. She fought the urge to run as she headed down the white walled hallways.

"Jane!" Frankie stood up as soon as he saw his sister. "Any news?"

"Mama!" Anna's eyes went wide and she immediately squirmed off Angela's lap to run towards her mother.

Jane smiled tiredly and scooped the girl up in her arms, pulling her close. "Hi, peanut."

"Where's Mommy? I want Mommy!"

"Mommy's still in the hospital room, honey." Jane sighed and pulled Anna's head to her chest as she looked at her mother and brother. "No news. Still the same situation."

"God, how long has she been at it?"

"I don't now, more than eight hours." Jane furrowed her brow and brushed her fingers through Anna's hair.

"Something wrong then?" Frankie asked in a concerned tone. "Why's it taking so long?"

Angela smiled and stood up from her chair. "It's not unusual. With Tommy, I spent twelve hours in that stupid room. Your father just pacing back and forth, drinking too much coffee and being a pain in the ass…"

"Whoa, Ma." Jane motioned at the little girl on her hip.

"I'm just sayin'!" Angela held up her hands. "I should've known that man was trouble back then."

"Yeah yeah." Frankie placed his hand on his mother's arm and looked back at Jane. "Anything we can do?"

"I was just gonna get some ice."

"I'm on it!" Angela immediately hurried off towards the machine in the corner of the room.

Jane smiled and shook her head before looking at Anna's head on her shoulder, seeing worry edged on her young face. She had grown, but she was quite short for her age. Her hair was slowly getting a darker shade of blond due to the lack of sunshine in winter, but her eyes still sparkled like the day they met her. She was getting more and more beautiful with each day that passed. "Mommy told me to say she's doing alright," Jane said softly, tucking a strand of hair behind Anna's ear. "And to give you a kiss from her." She took Anna's chin and quickly pecked her lips as she smiled at the girl. "She's gonna be okay."

"I wanna see Mommy."

Jane sighed. "You can't, baby. I'm sorry."

Anna's bottom lip quivered and Jane took a deep breath to compose herself. "You're going to have to stay with Grandma and Uncle Frankie just a bit longer. I promise to get you as soon as the baby is here, okay?"

"Okay." Anna wrapped her short arms around Jane's neck and snuggled in close. Jane saw her mother getting back and knew that she had to let her daughter go, not wanting to leave Maura for a minute too long.

"I have to go back to Mommy, peanut," Jane said softly as she pressed a kiss to Anna's forehead. "I'll give her a kiss back from you, okay?"

Anna smiled a tired smile and allowed Jane to hand the girl back to Angela. She took the cup of ice from her mother and was happy to see Anna resting comfortably on Angela's hip, her small body curled up into her grandmother's warm side.

"I'll be back if there's news!" Jane said when she was already heading back to her wife. When she entered the room, she saw Maura sitting on her hands and knees, biting her lip to keep from screaming out in pain. "Oh babe." Jane almost dropped the ice as she put it on the table and placed her hands on Maura's lower back, putting the pressure where she knew it would relieve some pain.

It must have been going for a while because Maura slumped back down after only a few seconds. "They're getting closer together," she mumbled, out of breath. "A n-nurse should-…"

"Already pushed the button." Jane brushed Maura's hair out of her face and gently helped her rest back against the pillows, pulling the blanket over her bare legs, the hospital gown ridden up during the contraction. She pressed her lips against her wife's sweaty cheek and carefully sat down on the edge of the bed. "That's a kiss from Anna."

"Hm." Maura closed her eyes. "How is she?"

Jane shrugged. "Worried about you. But she was okay with my mom."

"Good." Maura sighed deeply but groaned when another contraction hit her. She slumped forward again, closing her eyes, tears falling down her cheeks.

"Shh, it's almost over, babe," Jane said softly, "soon we'll be holding or beautiful son or daughter. It'll all be over soon."

Maura nodded in the middle of her contraction, but Jane was wrong. It wasn't over soon. The contractions were closer together but she wasn't dilated enough to start pushing yet. And to make it all worse, the nurse got a worried look on her face when she came in the third time that night to check up on her.

"Something's wrong, isn't it?" Maura said, her voice weak and defeated.

The nurse, an older lady named Ruth, shook her head. She adjusted the blankets and sighed. "The baby's in breech. I think we need to do a C-section."

Maura closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead, watching nurse Ruth having a quick phone call with a doctor. "I wanted to have the baby in a natural way."

"Maur," Jane whispered, gently squeezing her wife's hand in hers. "A C-section is for the best. It's what our baby needs. And what you need."

Maura nodded, opening her eyes to look at Jane, fear and pain showing in her hazel eyes. "I know."

"We're going to take you to the delivery room, Dr. Isles." The nurse smiled reassuringly and pulled the blankets back up. "You'll be holding your baby soon."

Maura closed her eyes. "Thank God."

"You don't know if it's a boy or girl yet, do you?" she asked as she started moving the bed, motioning Jane to get up from her chair.

Jane shook her head. "Nope. We like the element of surprise."

"You're a doctor, Dr. Isles." Ruth smiled as she started wheeling the bed out of the room. "Haven't you seen it?"

Maura shook her head. "The baby was in a difficult position to tell. We didn't get more sonograms than necessary."

"I have a feeling it's gonna be a boy." Jane smirked. "Yeah, it's gonna be a boy."

"Don't listen to her," Maura said with a tired smile. "She relies on her instincts."

"Hey, my cop-gut doesn't betray me!"

Maura chuckled but her smile broke off when she had another contraction. The nurse quickened her pace and pushed the bed towards the delivery room where their baby would be brought into this world.

After that, it only took a short while. "She's almost here," the doctor said, holding out his hands to receive another instrument from his nurse, his glove covered in blood and other stuff Jane didn't want to know.

"You're almost done, Maur," Jane said as she felt her wife squeezing her hand. "You're-… Wait, did you say she?" she shot her attention towards the doctor, her eyes widening, her heartbeat speeding up. "She?"

The doctor looked up at them and smiled. "Yes."

"A girl?" Jane looked at Maura and saw a tired smile curling her lips. "We're having a girl…"

Maura nodded, bringing Jane's hand up to her lips to kiss her knuckles. "You and your cop-gut…"

"Oh you're halfway sedated and now you get sarcastic on me?" Jane chuckled and wrapped her arm tighter around her wife's shoulders.

Maura was about to reply when the doctor told her to push and a strangled cry sounded through the hospital room. She gasped and tears sprung to her eyes as the doctor brought up a tiny, wrinkled, purple little baby, covered in blood and gross stuff. They quickly cleaned her up and moved Maura's hospital gown to place the baby on her bare chest.

The baby's head was covered with dark hair, and a lot of it. Her tiny fist were shaking around, her feet peaking out from the white blanket she was wrapped in. Ten fingers, ten toes. She was breathing, crying, and moving. A healthy baby.

Jane didn't realize she was crying until she felt her tears falling into her own lap. She moved her shaking hand up and gently, carefully caressed the baby's damp cheek, smiling through her tears. "Hi," she whispered, her voice nothing more than a high-pitched whisper. "Welcome to the world, baby girl."

Maura's hands were trembling as they wrapped around the tiny baby on her chest, silent tears streaming down her face. She whimpered when the nurse reached out for the small girl. "No…"

"We're just going to examine her, Dr. Isles." Ruth smiled. "Shouldn't take more than a minute or two."

Maura nodded and watched as the nurse took their baby to weigh her and perform all the necessary tests to make sure everything was okay. "She's healthy," Maura whispered, her hand clinging to Jane's leg next to her. "And she's so beautiful."

Jane turned her attention towards her wife and saw extreme exhaustion as well as pure, unconditional love edged on her beautiful face. She gently cupped Maura's chin and pressed her lips against the blonde's for a sweet, loving kiss. "I love you," she whispered, smiling lovingly. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." Maura rested her forehead against Jane's and looked into her eyes for a while until the nurse came back with the baby, this time wrapped up in a pink blanket.

"Is it okay if I hand her to Mrs. Rizzoli so we can get you cleaned up, Dr. Isles?"

Maura just nodded, allowing the doctor to finish his stitches and clean up. Jane's mouth fell open as she took the tiny girl in her arms, smiling when her small fists waved out of her blanket. She made a gurgling sound and Jane met with the most beautiful dark baby-eyes she had ever seen. They were just like hers. Not quite as dark yet, but they would be one day. She would have the same curls as Jane, the same features, the same nose. Jane could already tell and she was already the proudest mother in the world. "Hi there," she whispered through her tears. "Hi beautiful."

The next hour was spent simply staring at their newborn baby. Just staring, crying and smiling happily. The nurse helped Maura out of her hospital gown, washing herself and changing into a pair of clean, silk pajamas. All the pain was forgotten. Yes, it was hell. But as soon as the baby latched on to Maura's breast for the first time, everything was forgotten. All that mattered was the beautiful baby in Maura's arms.

"You should tell the family," Maura whispered, her finger gently caressing the baby's cheek.

Jane nodded. "I know but what if she grows up when I'm away?"

Maura chuckled and slapped Jane's leg. "Go. And bring Anna, please?"

"Of course." Jane smirked and kissed her wife's lips before carefully pressing another kiss to the baby's forehead. She hurried back to the waiting room, her family jumping up when they saw her.

"And?" Angela asked, jumping up from her chair.

Jane smiled, composing herself for a second before speaking. "We have a baby girl."

The room broke out into excited squeals but Jane only had eye for Anna who had streaks of leftover tears on her pale cheeks as she reached up her arms towards her mother. While Angela was kissing her cheek, Frankie squeezing her arm and asking questions she didn't hear, she lifted Anna in her arms and pressed her lips against the girl's forehead.

"You have a sister, honey," she whispered. "A baby sister."

"Can I see her?" Anna asked, twirling her mother's curls around her small finger. "And Mommy?"

"Yeah." Jane kissed Anna's cheek and pulled her to her chest to look at her family. "Everything's perfectly healthy. She's gorgeous."

Angela smiled, getting choked up on her daughter's words. "Oh, my granddaughter! Can I see her? I want to meet her!"

"Uhm… Well… We just wanted some time with Anna first, if that's okay?"

Angela looked disappointed but Frankie stepped in. "Of course."

"Just come by with like, an hour or something. I'm sorry."

Angela smiled. "I understand. She needs you." She pointed at Anna and gently rubbed the girl's back. "She's been crying for you."

Jane nodded, pulling Anna close in her arms. "Yeah…"

"Go back to your wife!" Angela playfully pinched her daughter's arm, eliciting a chuckle. "And congratulate her from us."

"C'mon, peanut." She adjusted Anna on her hip and hurried back to the private hospital room.

Anna lifted her head from Jane's shoulder as she saw Maura through the glass in the wooden door. "Mommy!"

Jane chuckled and opened the door, causing Maura to lift her head and turn her attention away from the baby towards her wife and oldest daughter. "Hi, pretty girl," she smiled lovingly at Anna who squirmed out of Jane's arms to run towards her other mother.

"Mommy!"

"Be careful, honey." Jane smiled and closed the door behind her to lift Anna up on the bed.

Maura smiled at the little girl and looked at Jane. "Could you take her, please?" she asked softly as she handed the baby to her wife.

Jane carefully took the baby in her arms, sitting next to Maura on the bed as she watched Maura opening her arms for Anna. Anna climbed into her mother's lap but Maura hissed and stopped her. "Oh baby, just sit next to me, okay? Mommy's not quite ready for that yet."

Anna nodded and nestled in between her mothers, snuggling into Maura's side as her arms wrapped around the little girl. Maura's thumb brushed across Anna's cheek as Anna looked at her baby sister with wide eyes, filled with fear. "This is your sister, honey," Maura whispered, pressing a kiss on top of Anna's head. "You finally met the baby!"

"Yeah…" Anna's voice was soft and laced with exhaustion after sleeping for only a few hours that night. "What's the baby's name?"

"Well…" Maura looked at Jane and then back at the baby.

Jane smiled, staring at the gorgeous baby girl in her arms. She couldn't take her eyes of the little creature. She was slowly falling asleep, her dark eyes closing as she stopped squirming and relaxed in her mother's arms. She was without a doubt the most beautiful baby in the world. Jane knew all mothers thought that about their newborns but her baby daughter truly was the most beautiful of them all. She smiled and gently stroked the baby's cheek. "We were thinking, for a girl, Lillian," she replied softly. "Lily, for short,"

Anna nodded and leaned forward to look at the baby. "Hi, baby Lily."

 _A/N The baby is here! I know a lot of you wanted to read more pregnancy stuff but I don't want to take things too slow. There's always room for flashbacks though! Thank you so much for reading this story and being so kind, it means a lot to me! As always, I can use suggestions for storylines so don't hesitate to tell me what you would like to read. I love to get inspired by you all!_


	15. Chapter 15

_A/N I'm not a doctor, or an expert on giving birth. Hello to the guests that lectured me on the mistakes I made. Thank you for ignoring all the work I put into the chapter and only focusing on the small technicalities. It's not supposed to be about the giving birth, it's about the family. I'm in film school, not medical school. I apologize for the mistakes._

 _Thank you to the people that sent me kind reviews and constructive criticism, I appreciate it more than you know! I hope you like this chapter, it's kind of a filler chapter with just fluff but please let me know your thoughts and feelings._

Chapter 15

After a few days, the women were allowed to take the baby home. Lillian Rizzoli-Isles was a content, happy little baby. She rarely cried unless she was hungry, and she was sleeping and drinking well. Maura was exhausted and hormones were messing with her head, but she was the happiest woman in the world.

She just settled upstairs in bed while Jane changed Lily's diaper in the brand new baby room. She adjusted the blankets over her legs and rubbed her eyes. The past days had been filled with visitors, poopy diapers and it had all been a rush. She was extremely happy to be back home. She needed time to just enjoy her family.

"Mommy?" Anna's head peaked through the doorway, eliciting a smile from the blonde in bed.

"Hi, baby." She shifted and pulled the covers away. "Come here."

Anna rushed towards the bed and climbed in, sliding under the blankets. She had been spending her days with Angela while she was at the hospital. Jane went back every night to put the girl to bed and then waited until she was sleeping before heading back to the hospital to spend the night with Maura and the baby. Anna and Angela had been visiting them as often as they could, but it was tiring for the girl. She was away from home and had to spend way too much time in an unfamiliar environment with unfamiliar people. She was happy to be home, Maura could feel it.

She wrapped her arms around the little girl and pulled her into her side. "How are you, pretty girl?"

Anna shrugged. "Good."

"Hm." Maura pursed her lips and brushed Anna's hair back. "How do you like being a big sister?"

"'S okay. The baby's sweet, like my dolls."

Maura smiled. "Yes, she is." She caressed Anna's cheek and looked into her sparkling grey eyes, smiling when her daughter showed a small smile. "Just know that you're still my beautiful baby girl," she whispered. "My beautiful, beautiful baby girl."

"I'm not a baby," Anna answered quietly. "Lily's the baby now."

Maura sighed. It was hard for Anna. She was right; she wasn't the baby of the family anymore. "Well, yes. Lillian is the baby of the family but that doesn't mean you're not my baby anymore!"

Anna giggled and shook her head. "Nooo…"

"Oh but I love you so much, sweetheart." Maura pulled her daughter closer into her side and kissed the top of her head. "That won't ever change."

"Are you gonna send me back, Mommy?" Anna asked, looking up at her mother.

"What?"

"To the other kids?"

"No! We've talked about this, we adopted you." Maura swallowed a lump in her throat and tucked Anna's hair behind the girl's ear. "You're our daughter and we're never sending you anywhere."

"But now you and Mama has a new baby…"

"No, we have two girls. That's different." She sighed and looked up when she heard Jane walking back into the room after changing Lily's diaper.

Jane smiled, carrying the baby girl in her arms into the bedroom. "She's hungry, Maur."

"Hm." Maura smiled lovingly and kissed the top of Anna's head before untangling her arms from the girl to take Lily in her arms. She unbuttoned her silk pajama top and moved it away, adjusting the baby so she could latch on. "Oh you _are_ hungry," Maura chuckled. "There you go, sweetheart."

Anna looked at the baby but turned her attention away when Jane brushed her hand through blond hair. "What should we do for dinner tonight, peanut?"

Anna shrugged and leaned into Jane's side, nestling in strong, safe arms. "Fries and chicken."

"Fries and chicken?" Jane chuckled and looked at her wife. "You're clearly my kid."

Maura shook her head, her lips curling up into a slight smile. "You can have fries and chicken as long as you pick a vegetable."

Anna pursed her lips and sighed deeply. "Mommy can pick the vegetable."

Maura chuckled and caressed Lily's cheek as the girl drank hungrily. "I think there are some leftover green beans in the freezer."

"Ahh…" Anna furrowed her brow.

"You said I could pick, Anna."

"Why's Lily not have to eat vegetables?"

"She doesn't have teeth yet, she won't be able to chew them." Maura couldn't keep her eyes off her baby girl, dark eyes looking up at her, a tiny hand resting on the swell of her breast as she drank, which was the strangest yet loveliest feeling in the world. "She can only have breast milk."

"Ugh." Anna stuck out her tongue. "Only milk?"

Jane laughed. "Yeah, gross huh?"

Anna nodded as she played with Jane's long fingers on her stomach. "Yeah."

"Hey, did you tell Mommy about your new friend yet?"

Anna shook her head and turned her attention towards Maura. "I made a friend, Mommy."

Maura tore her eyes away from the baby in her arms to look at Anna, lifting her eyebrows in surprise. Anna was shy and seemed to afraid to make friends. "You did? Where?"

"At the hospital." Anna's head rested back against the headboard as she smiled up at her mother. "Morgan's daddy's in the hospital."

"Oh, you met her at the hospital?"

"Yeah. She and I went to play in the playroom. There's dolls there too, but they's broken." Anna chuckled softly. "One only has one arm."

"Sweet girl," Jane said, looking at Lily in Maura's arms. "A little older than Anna, I think she was five." 

"Yeah Morgan's five," Anna pitched in.

"Did you speak to her parents?" Maura asked as she turned her attention back to their nursing daughter.

Jane nodded. "Her mom. Chaotic type, shy but sweet."

"Why was her father in the hospital, sweetie?"

Anna shrugged. "Morgan says he gots a broken head."

"A broken head?" Maura's eyes went wide. "A broken skull? Is he still alive?"

"Maur." Jane chuckled and she shook her head, gently caressing Anna's cheek with the back of her hand. "We're talking about two preschoolers here. I'm sure 'a broken head' is not exactly the right diagnosis."

"Right." Maura sighed. "Well I'm glad you made a friend, honey."

Anna nodded and smiled slightly.

"I kind of promised them a play date when her dad gets back from the hospital and everything's more settled here," Jane said. "Sorry I didn't check in on you about that."

"It's okay." Maura looked away from Lily at her wife. "I'm just happy she made a friend."

"Can I watch TV?" Anna asked when a silence fell between the women.

"Yeah but get Mommy's iPad, okay?" Jane said, placing a kiss on Anna's forehead before lifting the girl off the bed. "So you won't be all alone downstairs."

"Can I watch in my room?" Anna asked excitedly, jumping off the bed.

"Yep."

"Yay!"

"Only the kids channel!" Maura called after the girl as she hurried out of the room. She shook her head when she heard a soft 'yeah' called back to her. Her attention immediately went back to Lily who almost finished her meal. Maura smiled. She gently caressed the baby's pink cheek and the dark hair on her tiny head. "She looks so much like you," she whispered.

Jane shifted closer towards her wife, nestling against her side, smiling as she placed her hand on the baby's belly. "Yeah. She's gonna be a handful, Maura."

Maura chuckled. "Oh yes she is. If she's got even half of your temper and stubbornness... We'll be having a rough time with her once she hits her teenage years." She smiled and felt Lilly pulling away from her breast. She hissed when she adjusted the girl on her chest to burp. Her breasts were sensitive and in moments like these they even hurt.

"Oh I don't think we have to wait for the teenage years," Jane smirked. "Ma told me I was the worst six-year old in the world."

"But you must have been adorable," Maura said with a smile, resting her head against the baby's as she gently patted the girl's back. "And ours will be adorable as well. She's yours, after all."

"Maura." Jane's smile fell and she looked into her wife's eyes. "You know she's not just mine. Yeah, we used my egg but you gave birth to her. You're gonna teach her to love books and science, and you're gonna buy her pretty clothes…"

"She won't want to wear them." Maura chuckled.

"Maybe she does! You don't know." Jane smiled lovingly and brushed her fingers across Maura's freckled cheek. "She's yours too, Maur. You're her mother too."

Maura smiled. Yes, she was afraid. She was afraid she wouldn't feel connected to Lily. She was afraid that because she was Jane's biological daughter, she wouldn't be close to her own daughter. "What if she's all you?" she whispered, her hand still patting Lily's back.

Jane shrugged. "Well, I'm all me and I love you like crazy." She smirked but her smile fell when she saw the worry in Maura's eyes. "Hey." She cupped her wife's cheek. "If anyone should know that nurture outranks nature, it should be you. Your biological father is the biggest mob boss in the city and you don't have an evil bone in your body. Not a single one." Jane smiled slightly, her brown eyes sparkling with love and care. "Because you were raised but sophisticated, intelligent people and you grew up to be the most amazing, sweet, caring, brilliant and beautiful person I know. Eggs or sperm didn't do that."

Tears filled Maura's eyes as she listened to her wife's husky voice speaking those words full of love and care. "I know."

"Just because we used my egg doesn't mean she'll be a copy of me. She's going to be her own unique little person and she's going to love you like crazy."

Maura nodded, adjusting Lily back in her arms after she burped. The girl was already halfway back asleep, her eyes closing, her small fists unclenching on her belly. "I love her like crazy too," she whispered. "Because she's like you and because she's her own unique little person."

"Well not yet, really," Jane smirked. "Right now she's just pooping and eating and crying, not much of a personality there."

"Oh you should hear the way she cries for food and the way she latches on to my breast!" Maura chuckled. "She couldn't be anyone else's daughter but yours."

Jane laughed and shook her head. "I'm so proud." She chuckled and brushed her fingers across Lily's cheek. "How's Anna?"

"She's okay, I think. She's getting used to the fact that she's not the baby of the family anymore." Maura smiled as she felt Lily drifting off to sleep in her arms. "We just need to remind her every now and then that we love her just as much."

"Noted." Jane rested her head on Maura's shoulder, staring at their baby daughter. "We have two gorgeous daughters," she whispered quietly.

"And I have a gorgeous wife." Maura smiled and pressed her lips against the top of Jane's head. "We're two lucky women."


	16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

"When's Mama gonna be back?" Anna asked, looking at the pocket watch in her hands.

"I told you honey, when the big one goes around one more time." Maura sighed, holding a crying Lily in her arms. She was growing teeth and crying more than she had done her entire short life. "Shh I know, my love," Maura soothed the crying girl, trying to get her to bite on her soft toy.

"Why's Lily crying, Mommy?"

"Because her teeth are coming through and it hurts. Did you finish your apple?"

Anna shook her head.

"Finish it, please. And then go put on your sweater, it's too cold to be wearing a T-shirt."

Anna's smile fell and she focused on her cut-up apple in the plastic bowl on the coffee table, slowly putting a piece in her mouth. Maura sighed deeply as she witnessed Anna crawling into her shell. She was too harsh on the girl. She only took off her sweater to cover up her dolls, because they were cold. "I'm sorry, honey," Maura said, her voice quieter. "I'm just a bit tired."

Anna nodded but didn't look at her mother. She put the last piece of apple in her mouth and headed towards her dolls, gently taking her blue sweater away to put it back on.

Maura wasn't just tired. The broken nights were breaking her, yes. But she was so emotional. She couldn't look in the mirror, she only wore wide sweatshirts and she put her hair up in ponytails. An ugly scar disfigured her lower belly, her breasts were huge and painful, her nipples were cracked and her hips and stomach were covered in stretch marks. It was no wonder Jane hadn't looked at her in weeks. It was no wonder she was happy to get back to work for the first time today. She didn't like leaving Lily behind and she even got a bit emotional when she said goodbye that morning, but she brushed Maura off with only a quick peck on the lips. Tears burned in the blonde's eyes when she thought back to it.

And now she made Anna feel bad. She closed her eyes and rocked Lily back and forth in her arms. "Come on, baby. Calm down, do it for Mommy, please?" She looked at the screaming girl, her eyes squeezed shut, black curls covering her small head, pink cheeks, a small, sharp nose. A splitting image of Jane. "I know my sweet girl," Maura soothed, "Mommy's here. Shh, Mommy's here."

Maura's soothing voice slowly calmed the baby girl down, her cries fading into quiet whimpers. "That's it, my baby."

When Lily finally turned quiet after a few more minutes, Maura adjusted the girl on her chest and sat down on the couch, sighing deeply in relief. She felt her baby daughter relaxing against her and looked over to her oldest daughter, watching Anna putting one of her dolls to bed. "Honey?" she whispered, careful not to pull Lily out of her slumbering sleep.

"Hm?" Anna looked up at her mother but quickly averted her gaze again, afraid that she did something wrong.

"I'm not mad, sweetheart," Maura said softly. "Come over for a hug?"

The gentle tone in Maura's voice put the little girl at ease and she slowly stood up to climb up on the couch, wrapping her short arms around her mother's neck as Maura pulled her into her side. "I love you, pretty girl," she whispered, kissing the side of Anna's head. "I'm sorry Mommy's so busy with Lily sometimes."

Anna shrugged. "'S okay."

"Hm." Maura was about to reply when her phone rang. "Oh could you grab that for me, honey? It's on the kitchen table."

"Yep." Anna slid off the couch and hurried towards the ringing phone, running back to hand it to Maura.

Maura furrowed her brow when she saw it was BPD and she wondered why Jane didn't use her cellphone to call home. "Dr. Isles?"

"Doc, it's Frost."

"Barry?" Maura, immediately alarmed, felt a knot tying in her stomach. "Something wrong?"

"Uhm…"

"Is it Jane?"

"Listen-…"

"What happened?" Maura's startled voice jolted Lily awake who started crying again, eliciting a sigh from her mother. She stood up and rocked the baby back and forth.

"We got a lead on a case, and… It's my fault, really. I didn't see the gun he had registered."

"Gun?!" Maura's heart fell into a bottomless pit.

"She's okay! She went after him and got shot in the leg, that's all." Frost sounded hurried, like he was walking through crowded hallways. A hospital, probably. "She's in surgery, she just lost a lot of blood. Doctor says she's gonna be fine. She's-…"

"Where?" Maura put Lily down in her playpen and was already on her way to put on her shoes.

Frost sighed.

"Where?" Maura asked, more firmly.

"Room 205, right wing of Mass General."

She hung up the phone without saying goodbye, unable to think clearly. Her wife got shot. Jane got shot. "Come on baby, you're going to visit Grandma for a while," she said to Anna.

"No, Mommy why?"

"Mommy needs to go, it's an emergency. Come on, put on your coat."

Anna shook her head. "Is Mama hurt?"

Maura sighed deeply and closed her eyes, trying to think over the sound of Lily's loud cries. "She's going to be fine. Now go put on your coat!"

"I wanna come with you."

Maura was already dialing Angela's number as she shook her head. "You can't honey."

Angela was happy to watch Anna and Lily while Maura rushed towards the hospital, feeling like her head was spinning, her legs shaking, her heart pounding. She parked her car and hurried inside, following the directions Frost gave her until she realized that Jane was in surgery. She stood still in an empty hallway and rested her back against the white wall, closing her eyes.

Her legs gave out. She sunk to the floor and allowed her tears to fall down her cheeks. The professional, brilliant Dr. Isles was reduced to a mess of tears in jeans and a stained sweatshirt, on the floor of a hospital hallway. She hugged her knees to her chest and hid her face into her arms, continuing to cry softly until she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Excuse me?" A male nurse looked down at Maura.

Maura quickly composed herself, wiping her cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater and standing up from the floor. "Yes, I'm sorry. I'm uhm… I'm looking for Jane Rizzoli."

"Oh Detective Rizzoli?" He nodded. "You're her partner, aren't you? Dr. Isles?"

Maura wiped her cheek again as she nodded her head. "Yes. I'm sorry, I'm not usually this emotional. See, I just had a baby a few weeks ago, my hormones-…"

"I understand." The nurse nodded politely, showing a fake smile. "Uhm, Detective Rizzoli is still in surgery, they're just closing up the wound and giving her more blood. She'll be out soon."

"Where is the wound located?"

"Just below the hip. It shouldn't leave too much terminal damage, just a scar."

Maura nodded. "Thank you."

"There's a private waiting room just down the hall on the left, if you want to wait over there. I'll make sure someone calls you as soon as she gets out of surgery."

"Thank you. I-… I'm sorry again."

He shook his head. "No problem."

Maura watched him walk away and went into the waiting room he described, seeing a very small room with a single couch, a small table with a few magazines, and a coffee machine. She sat down on the ugly purple couch and lowered her head into her hands. "Think rational," she whispered to herself. "It's just a flesh wound. Just below the hip. She's getting blood transfusions. She'll be out soon. Calm down, Dr. Isles." She lifted her head and took a deep breath. "Calm down. She'll wake up. She has to. For me, and for Lily and Anna."

Whispering her daughters' names brought tears to her eyes. Anna. She treated her badly. The girl must be so afraid. She had been unfair. She took her phone out of the pocket of her jeans and dialed Angela's number.

"Maura?" Angela's familiar voice sounded worried. "Any news?"

"No, I'm sorry Angela. She's still in surgery, but she'll be alright." The calmness in her voice surprised herself. "How is Anna?"

Angela sighed and Maura knew what that meant.

"Oh Angela I've been to harsh on her. I know how sensitive she is, I should have taken the time to explain the situation to her instead of rushing off like this. She must be so upset!"

"She's a little out of it, yeah," Angela replied. "But honey, I understand. You panicked."

"I shouldn't have treated her like that." Maura shook her head. "I-… I know it's too much to ask… But-… I-…"

"I'll ask Frankie to bring her over." Angela chuckled. "Calm down, sweetheart. She's okay."

"Oh, thank you." Maura released her breath and felt her muscles relaxing. "How is Lillian?"

"Just fine. A bit restless, but I'll put her to bed soon. I'll keep her here for today."

Maura nodded. "Thank you, Angela."

"Keep me updated, alright? Anna's on her way."

"Give her a kiss from me!" Maura hung up the phone and rested her head back against the wall behind the couch, anxiously waiting for Anna to arrive. She texted Frankie the room she was in and thanked him for driving her daughter.

She got impatient and the small room was making her anxious so she paced through the hallway for the next fifteen minutes until Frankie appeared, holding the hand of her little girl. "Anna."

Maura expected a loud 'Mommy!' and the familiar feeling of her girl crashing into her legs, but Anna just looked at her mother with wide eyes. Maura kneeled on the floor, smiling lovingly as she opened her arms. "Hi, my sweet girl," she whispered.

Anna made up her mind and ran into her mother's open arms, almost knocking her over. "Mommy…"

"I'm so sorry, honey," Maura said as she kissed the side of her daughter's head. "I love you so much. I'm sorry, I was just afraid."

"Where's Mama?" Anna asked, squeezing her short arms around Maura's neck.

Maura sighed and lifted the girl up in her arms, looking at Frankie over Anna's shoulder. "Mama's in surgery, honey. She's hurt, but the doctors are helping her."

"You gonna be okay?" Frankie asked softly, fumbling with his car keys.

Maura nodded, placing her hand on the back of Anna's head. "Now that I have her with me, yes. Thank you so much for bringing her over. You're welcome to stay if you want."

Frankie shook his head. "I have to go back to the station, I'm helping the team out."

"Okay. Well, thank you again."

"You're welcome." Frankie furrowed his brow and hesitated for a while before giving his sister-in-law a quick hug. "Hang in there, Maur. Jane's gonna be okay. She's a Rizzoli."

Maura nodded, showing a slight smile. "I know."

"Bye, Anna." Frankie gently rubbed Anna's back and waved at them before turning and heading back down the hallway.

Maura sighed and took Anna back into the small waiting room, sitting on the couch with the girl in her lap. Anna rested sideways against Maura's front and wiggled the watch out of her pocket. She held it up in front of her and looked at it with her brow furrowed. "Mommy, the big one's been around almost two times…"

"I know, sweetheart." Maura took a deep breath and caressed Anna's cheek.

"Why's Mama not back?" Thick tears fell down Anna's pale cheeks as she spoke softly. "Mama's always back on time. Or she calls to say she's not on time and give new time."

"Mama couldn't call this time."

Anna kept staring at the watch in her small hands. "I want Mama back."

Maura sighed as she gently wiped Anna's tears with the back of her hand. "I want her back too, honey." She closed her eyes and felt Anna tucking her head under her mother's chin. She could only wait.

Fortunately for her and Anna, the wait didn't take too long. After thirty awful minutes of anxiously waiting, the door of the small waiting room opened and an older doctor entered. "Dr. Isles?"

"Yes?" Maura stood up from the couch, placing Anna on her hip.

"She's out of surgery, you can see her now."

"Oh thank God." Maura sighed in relief. "How is she?" she asked while she followed the man towards Jane's hospital room.

"She's just fine." He smiled at them. "She'll wake up soon. She might be a little disoriented and dizzy due to the blood loss, but we closed up the wound quite nicely."

Maura just nodded as she walked behind the doctor, simply wishing she could see her wife's face. They reached a hospital room and she gasped when she saw a hint of black curls through the small window in the door. She gently put Anna on the floor, taking the girl's hand before opening the door to Jane's room.

"Mama!"

"Your mama is still sleeping," the doctor said politely. "She'll be up soon. Be good to her, okay?"

Anna didn't reply and Maura barely heard the short conversation. She had only eye for the sight of Jane's pale face framed by messy dark curls. "Oh, Jane," she whimpered, hurrying towards the side of the bed. She placed her hand on her wife's cheek and cried softly. "My love…"

She didn't notice the doctor leaving until she felt Anna's hand on her hip, causing her to lift her head and look at her little girl. "Mama's okay, honey," she managed to get out through her tears before she turned back to look at Jane. She burst out into fresh tears and lowered her head, trying to compose herself. She's okay. She didn't lose her wife. Everything would be okay.

She moved a chair next to Jane's bed and sat down, taking Anna in her lap. "See, honey?" she whispered, wiping her cheeks with the back of her hand. "Mama's just sleeping. She'll wake up soon."

Anna nodded, but her brow was still furrowed. Maura smiled and placed a kiss on Anna's temple. "She'll be okay, sweetheart. I promise."

With the word 'promise', Anna relaxed in her mother's arms. Maura never broke promises. She didn't make them unless she insisted on keeping them, no matter what. She soothingly rubbed Anna's back and felt the girl's exhaustion. She rested her cheek against Anna's forehead and smiled at the four-year old. "Close your eyes, honey," Maura whispered. "Mommy's here. Mama's here. Try to rest, okay sweetie?"

Anna's eyes slowly closed as her thumb slid into her mouth, eliciting a sweet smile from her mother. The girl was asleep within only a few minutes. After almost an hour, Maura heard Jane's breathing pattern change and she shot her attention towards her wife. "Jane?" she whispered.

Jane's eyes opened and she turned her head, letting out a slight groan. "Maur?"

"Shh," Maura untangled her arm from Anna and placed her hand on Jane's arm. "You have a bullet wound in your upper leg, you've lost a lot of blood."

Jane hummed and looked into Maura's eyes. "I'm sorry," she whispered hoarsely. "I didn't know he had a gun."

Maura shook her head, tears filling her eyes. "It's not your fault." She gently lifted Anna out of her arms and put her into another chair, careful not to wake her. She turned back to Jane's side and cupped the brunette's face, looking into those dark eyes she loved so much before pressing her lips against her wife's. She felt Jane's arm wrapping weakly around her neck and she buried herself into her shoulder, crying softly. "Oh Jane, you scared us," Maura whispered. "I thought I lost you…"

"Hey." Jane gently made Maura pull back and cupped her cheek, her hand slightly shaking from the effort of keeping it up. "You didn't. I'm fine."

Maura smiled, brushing her hand across a pale cheek. "You've lost a lot of blood, Jane."

Jane shrugged. "I don't feel a thing."

Maura shook her head, surprising herself when she chuckled slightly. "Yes you do. Your leg is hurting, I know it is."

"Okay yeah." Jane smirked. "But I'm fine. A little dizzy, though."

"Should I call someone?"

"No." Jane smiled, looking exhausted. "I'm okay."

Maura sighed deeply and carefully sat down on the edge of the bed, her fingers gently stroking through dark curls. "How did it happen?"

"I thought I had him, didn't see his gun until I heard him shooting me." She sighed. "Frost took him in." She smiled sadly as she looked into Maura's eyes. "How'd Lily do her first day without Mama?"

Maura chuckled. "She did just fine, I just dumped her with your mother to rush over here."

"Yeah… Sorry about that."

"It's okay," she whispered as she continued her gently strokes on Jane's forehead. "She's been crying a lot today so I hope your mother is not too busy with her."

"She's used to it." Jane waved her hand but it fell down in the bed, her muscles too tired to keep it up.

"Take some rest, Jane."

"When can I go home?" Jane's eyes were already closing as her head turned to the side, her breathing slowing down.

"Tomorrow or the day after that, if everything goes alright." Maura brushed her hand through dark curls and pressed a kiss to her wife's forehead. "Sleep, my love. I'm here."


	17. Chapter 17

Chapter 17

"Mama?" A small voice called out in the back of Jane's mind, but her eyelids seemed too heavy to open up.

"Shh, Mama's still sleeping honey."

"When's she gonna be awake?"

"Soon, sweetheart."

Jane felt her lips curling into a slight smile before she slowly managed to open her eyes, smiling brightly when she saw Maura sitting next to her bed with Anna in her lap, the girl resting comfortably with her back against her mother's front, her short legs dangling on either side of Maura's legs.

"Look," Maura whispered in Anna's ear. "I think she heard you!"

Anna gasped as she saw her mother with her eyes open. "Mama!" She leaped forward but Maura stopped her, wrapping her arms firmly around the girl's waist.

"Careful, honey."

"Oh." Anna slumped back down but Jane opened her arms for the little girl.

"Careful hug?" she whispered.

Anna smiled happily and climbed on the bed with help from Maura, carefully reaching down to wrap her short arms around her mother's neck, her curly blond hair tickling Jane's skin.

"I'm okay, peanut," she whispered. "You don't have to be worried anymore." She heard soft sniffles coming from the young girl and smiled sadly. A girl her age shouldn't feel these kinds of emotions. "I'm sorry, baby. I'm sorry I let the bad guy get to me."

"Did you get the bad guy in the end, Mama?" Anna asked quietly, her voice muffled by the sheets and Jane's hair.

"Yeah, we did."

Anna nodded. "Good."

Jane gently pulled her daughter close but hissed when she moved her leg and felt the amount of pain that shot from her upper leg up to her hip. Anna immediately pulled back, looking guilty.

"Not your fault, baby," Jane said softly, her brow still furrowed in pain. "Painkillers are wearing off."

"I'm calling a nurse." Maura pushed the button on the side of the bed.

Jane just hummed, slowly adjusting her leg under the blankets as she watched Anna sliding off the bed and standing in between Maura's legs, the blonde's arms wrapping around her stomach. She smiled at her wife. "How did you sleep?"

"Good. Like I've been in a coma." Jane smirked, turning her head towards her wife and daughter. She winked at the beautiful blonde. "I'm okay."

Maura smiled but averted her gaze towards Anna, seeming afraid of the eye contact that happened. Jane furrowed her brow but didn't have time to process what happened when a nurse came in with painkillers and something to eat. The painkillers worked like a charm and she spent the rest of the day in a comfortable haze.

Her mother came by with Lily, which brought a bright smile to Maura's face as she fed the baby girl next to Jane's hospital bed. Lily fell asleep on her mother's chest and Anna played peacefully while Jane's brothers and colleagues stopped by later that day.

After a restless night without her girls and wife, she was allowed to go home. Maura insisted she'd use a wheelchair and she protested for a few minutes until Maura put Lily in her arms and made her sit down. She allowed her wife to help her into the car and she was incredibly happy to be back home.

She settled on the couch, Maura bringing her leg up with a few pillows before hurrying off to get a cup of coffee ready. "Maur," Jane stopped her, "can I have Lily?"

Maura smiled. "Of course." She got the baby girl out of her seat and carefully handed her to her wife. "Mama wants snuggles, darling," she said softly as she kissed Lily's pink cheek.

"Yeah she does." Jane smirked, adjusting the girl against her legs as Lily grabbed her finger in her small fist. "You don't like hospitals either, do you Lil?" The girl made a gurgling sound, eliciting a chuckle from her mother. "Yeah I knew you didn't. We're too badass for hospitals." 

"God Jane, if you don't watch your language her first word will be something inappropriate!" Maura shook her head as she put a steaming mug of coffee on the table in front of the couch.

Jane smirked and pressed her lips carefully against the baby's dark hair. "That'd be funny though." She pulled back and winked at her wife. "Her first word will be 'mommy', I'm sure of it."

"Most children actually say 'mama' or something that is similar to 'dada'."

"Hm," Jane hummed, still focusing on Lily's beautiful dark eyes that looked straight at her. She was truly a beautiful baby. Her dark eyes and hair reminded Jane of herself, but Lily was a quiet, content baby unlike herself at that age. Yes, Lillian was clearly Jane Rizzoli's daughter but she didn't have her temper yet. She was content, happy and sweet like Maura. "Who's my baby?" she whispered, gently ticking Lily's belly. "The beautifulest baby in the whole wide world!"

"Beautifulest?" Maura shook her head, her lips curled up into a slight smile. "You're incorrigible."

"Definitely." Jane smirked and moved Lily to lie on her chest, chuckling when she saw the girl yawning. She hummed a gentle tone as she rested her cheek against the baby's head, breathing in her lovely scent. She closed her eyes and smiled, getting lost in the blissful moment for a while until she felt Anna standing next to her. "Hey, peanut."

Anna smiled and carefully placed her hand on Lily's head, stroking her sister gently. "Can I help put Lily to bed for naps?"

"Sure you can." Jane looked at her oldest daughter and took one arm away from Lily to brush her blond hair back. "You want to change her diaper too?"

"Yep, but not if it's a poopy diaper." Anna wrinkled her nose. "Those are stinky."

Jane laughed, pinching Anna's arm. "Yeah, you let Mommy take care of those."

"She already had a pretty big diaper this morning so I don't expect any more," Maura replied while she was busy in the kitchen. "We'll put her down in thirty minutes or so, okay honey?"

"When's that?" Anna asked, furrowing her brow.

"When the big one is all the way on the three," Maura replied while she pointed at the clock on the wall.

"Okay!" Anna leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on the side of her baby sister's head before heading off to play with her toys.

Jane chuckled. The girl was getting comfortable in her role as a big sister. It was like having a real life doll for the little girl. She wanted to help bathe Lily, dress her, put her to bed… It was adorable. She liked to fasten Lily's diaper and button up her shirts and skirts, and even the baby-sized Red Sox jersey Jane bought for her baby daughter, much to Maura's disapproval. Maura liked to dress the girls in skirts and dresses with pink and flowers. Together with Jane, the two had a nice balance. Skirts were combined with sweaters and leggings, and dresses were for Sunday dinners or other special occasions. The most important thing was that the girls were comfortable.

That night, when both Anna and Lily were sound asleep, Jane hopped herself into bed after brushing her teeth, feeling a dull ache coming up in her leg again. She forgot her painkillers. "Maur?"

"Yes?" came the answer from the bathroom.

"Could you get my pills from the cabinet in there?"

"You forgot them again?" Maura asked, her voice laced with disapproval. "You know you're supposed to take them an hour before bed! You won't sleep tonight…"

"Yeah, yeah, I got caught up!"

Maura sighed and appeared from the bathroom, holding a box of medicine and a glass of water. "Take two, it'll help better."

"Thanks."

Maura smiled a slight smile and grabbed her pair of silk pajamas before heading off towards the bathroom again.

"Maur?" Jane furrowed her brow. Maura never changed in the bathroom. The closet was on the other side of the bed, she always changed into her pajamas in the bedroom.

"Yes?" Maura's peaked her head through the open bathroom door.

Jane chuckled. "Why are you changing in there? Y'know, the closet's over here." She smirked. "I thought I was the one that got a hit to the head."

Maura didn't smile. "I'm just changing into my pajamas."

"In the bathroom?" Jane's smile fell. Something was bothering her wife. "Something wrong, Maura?"

"No." Maura shook her head and disappeared again, signaling that something was definitely wrong.

"Maura." Jane tried to get up but flinched from the pain in her leg. She groaned softly.

"Don't get up," Maura called out from the bathroom, knowing what Jane was doing without looking.

"Something's bothering you."

"I'm fine." Maura came out of the bathroom buttoning up her pajama top. She grabbed her pile of clothes and hurried towards the closet to put them away.

Jane sighed deeply and sat back in her original position against the headboard. "Why are you afraid to change in front of me?" she asked, her voice soft and hurt.

After a short moment of silence, Maura came out of the closet. She looked down at the floor and turned off the lights before climbing in bed with her back facing Jane. "Goodnight, Jane."

"What the hell, Maur?" Jane furrowed her brow.

"I said goodnight." Maura's voice was strangled with tears and Jane saw her shoulders shaking slightly.

"Maura." Tears burned in her eyes as she turned and placed her hand on Maura's shoulder. "You're gorgeous," she whispered. "You're still the most gorgeous, beautiful, amazing woman I've ever met."

Maura shook her head, still not facing her wife.

"Yeah."

"Then why can't you even look at me?!" Maura sat up and hid her face into her hands.

"What? I-…"

"You don't look at me anymore, Jane! You- You turn away when I undress and the only time you do look is when I'm feeding Lillian and that's because of her! Not because of me!" Maura sobbed into her hands and shook her head. "I know I'm repulsive, but you can't even pretend you're still attracted to me!"

"Repulsive?" Jane breathed out, tears slowly trickling down her cheeks. "Maura…"

"I know it, Jane. You don't have to tell me otherwise. My breasts are disgusting, there's nothing left of my flat stomach and I know about the stretch marks. I see myself in the mirror, I know how it is." Maura's voice was soft and laced with tears, breaking Jane's heart.

"If you know how it is, then you know how gorgeous you are," Jane whispered, carefully moving closer towards the love of her life. "If you think, for one second, that I think you're repulsive… You can't be more wrong."

"I-…"

"No, don't start. I look away because you seem uncomfortable. I thought I'd give you time to get used to how things are." Jane sighed. She carefully shifted and placed her hand on her wife's wet cheek to lift her head and look into tear-filled hazel eyes. "You, Maura Isles, are the most beautiful woman I've ever seen." She smiled sadly and brushed her fingers across her wife's freckled cheek. "Your face is glowing, even more ever since we got Lily. You wear less make-up and I love how your freckles are standing out. Somehow you manage to still have perfectly styled curls, you look unbelievably hot in the jeans you wore today and even in a pair of sweatpants."

Maura smiled slightly through her tears and Jane placed a quick kiss on her forehead.

"You know what I love most about you?"

Maura shook her head.

"Your eyes." Jane pulled back and smiled, blushing at her own words. "They are like a thousand colors in one and they sparkle when you look at Anna and Lily, they speak of so much love. And when you look at me with those eyes… I feel loved." Jane shrugged and averted her gaze. "Yeah, your body changed but I only love you more because of it. You put on some weight and I love that because it means there's more of you."

Maura chuckled through her tears. "That's so cheesy."

"It's true!" Jane smirked, happy to see a smile in her wife's eyes again. "You're gorgeous. You think I care about stretch marks or imperfect nipples? And you think I have a problem with bigger boobs? C'mon Maur, you know me better than that."

Maura lifted her gaze to look into Jane's eyes, her lips curled up into a small smile. "I suppose I do."

"You were perfect before we got Lily and you're perfect now. You gave us the most amazing gift in the whole world with that baby and every time I look at you, it reminds me of what you did for our family."

Fresh tears sprung to Maura's eyes at Jane's heartfelt words. "Jane."

"You can swell up to the size of an elephant or shrink down to the size of a peanut and I'd still love you more than I'll ever love anyone ever again." Jane cupped her wife's face and looked into her eyes for a few moments before pressing her lips against hers for a sweet, gentle kiss.

"Thank you," Maura whispered after Jane pulled back from the kiss. "I love you so much."

"I love you more." Jane kissed her wife's lips again and gently pushed her down on the bed, deepening the kiss and moving her hand under Maura's pajama top, letting her fingers run across her stomach, under her breasts and across her side. Every touch was filled with love and care, and Jane knew that if it wasn't for her leg that was still hurting like hell, she would be determined to show her wife just how beautiful she was.

When they pulled apart, both women were panting for air and Maura tangled her fingers in Jane's curls. "I'm not ready to make love yet," she whispered, her breath tickling Jane's lips, smelling like toothpaste and Maura. "I'm sorry."

"I know." Jane smiled and let her thumb run across Maura's bottom lip. "I can't move my leg around so we can't do what I had in mind anyway."

Maura rolled her eyes but her smile fell when she realized what Jane said. "For God's sake, stop supporting yourself on it then!" She pushed Jane off of her and rolled on her side. "You have to give it rest, Jane."

Jane smirked, lying on her back as she pulled the blonde into her side, feeling her head resting on her chest. "I'm resting."

Maura hummed. "Yes. And you will for the next two weeks, of which you will spend one at home and one behind your desk."

"What? No way, I'm going back tomorrow. I can walk!"

"But you won't." Maura lifted her head and looked sternly at Jane, a look that told her not to protest. "You can't even drive! You are taking at least five days off."

"Two."

"Four."

Jane sighed. "You win."

Maura smiled triumphantly and kissed her wife's lips. "I always do."

"You just want me to change Lily's poopy diapers."

Maura shrugged. "I have Anna for that."

"Isn't that some kind of child abuse?" Jane lifted her eyebrow before pulling her wife back to her chest.

Maura chuckled, wrapping her arm around Jane's waist as she snuggled into her side. "We'll share the poopy diapers. Now sleep, Lily will be awake for her feeding in only three hours."

Jane hummed, wrapping her arms tighter around Maura's upper body to pull her close. "I love you, Maur," she whispered. "You're beautiful and I love you."

"I love you too, Jane."


	18. Chapter 18

Chapter 18

"It's nice to be out," Jane said, wrapping her arm around Maura's shoulders as they waited for their dessert at a cozy Italian restaurant. "Just the two of us."

"It is, isn't it? We needed it, too."

"Yeah. Some time away from home, enjoying each other."

"Romantic dinner." Maura sighed, fumbling with Jane's hand in her lap.

"Good food, good company."

Maura nodded slowly and pursed her lips. "You miss the kids too, don't you?"

"God, how long does it take to get a dessert ready?!" Jane turned her head for the tenth time, looking at the kitchen. "Yeah. I miss them."

Maura chuckled and rested her head on Jane's shoulder. "Me too."

"I hate that we didn't put Anna to bed." Jane sighed. "Did we make a mistake?"

"By going out?"

"Yeah."

Maura sighed, thinking about her little girls at home, being babysat by Angela. "No. The kids are fine with your mother. We gave Anna many goodnight kisses before we left. She'll be asleep soon."

Jane nodded. "Yeah. They're okay, right?"

"They are." Maura tangled her fingers with Jane's in her lap, snuggling even closer into her side.

"Maura?"

"Hm?"

"Is this how things will be from now on?" 

Maura lifted her head and looked at her wife. "What do you mean?"

"I mean… Being parents?"

Maura furrowed her brow. "Well yes, of course. We have two daughters, we are parents."

"No, I mean… Being nothing else. Like, only talking about the kids when we go out, going back as soon as we finish dessert…"

"Oh." Maura nodded as she understood what her wife meant. She leaned back on Jane's shoulder and felt her wife pressing a kiss to the top of her head. "You mean, is the hot couple we once were gone?"

Jane smirked. "I don't think that, last night proved a lot of hotness."

"It did." She chuckled.

"I just mean… Does it bother you that I'm mostly a mom? And a detective on the side?"

Maura lifted her head to look back at her wife, shaking her head. "No. God, no. I love you as a mother. I fall more and more in love with you with every interaction I witness between you and our children. We just… We closed a phase in our lives."

"I'm not saying I'm not having a nice time with you," Jane said softly, "but I am eager to get back home, because I really missed bedtime snuggles."

Maura laughed and brushed the messy curls she loved so much over her wife's shoulder. "My badass detective." She chuckled while she pressed her lips against Jane's, feeling her laughing against her as well. Kissing had never been like this. She had never kissed someone while she was laughing until she met Jane. Jane made her laugh, she made her feel special and loved.

Dessert arrived and Maura chuckled at how fast Jane ate it. She was truly eager to get home. They finished up and Jane called the waiter to pay before Jane stood up and offered Maura her coat. Maura smiled lovingly at her wife as she put it on, stealing a quick kiss while she closed the buttons. "Take a walk with me?" she whispered with a smile. "Can you take a little while longer without the girls?"

Jane smiled. "Yeah."

Maura smiled a dreamy smile and took Jane's hand in hers as they left the restaurant, walking into the humid autumn air. "I can't believe it's getting so cold already," Jane said softly. "Feels like we didn't even have summer this year."

"That's because you spent summer taking care of your pregnant wife." Maura smirked and wrapped one of her arms around Jane's waist as they slowly walked across the street.

"Hm. Best summer ever."

Maura laughed and breathed in the nightly air. Jane had been incredibly protective of her. She had been like a watchdog, protecting Maura and her big belly at all times. She even bought healthy food and prenatal vitamins. Maura loved every second of it and sometimes she actually missed being pregnant. It was the most powerful thing she's ever experienced and she was incredibly grateful for it. But she was even more grateful for the miracle they got out of it. Lillian and Anna were her little miracles and locked in her heart.

"It's gonna rain," Jane said softly as she squeezed her arm around Maura's shoulders.

Maura hummed and looked up at the sky, seeing a full, bright moon peaking through heavy clouds. She suddenly felt a warm hand on her cheek and turned her head to see her wife looking at her with a loving smile curling her lips.

"You look beautiful tonight," Jane whispered, gently caressing Maura's cheek.

"So do you, Jane. This suit looks lovely on you." She looked her wife up and down and leaned forward to capture her lips in a quick but loving kiss. Maura took time to make herself look good tonight, something she hadn't done in a while. After a lot of yoga and running, she fit into most of her old dresses again. She curled her hair, put on a pair of her highest heels, did her make-up like she used to and she felt beautiful again. The way Jane looked at her only contributed to that feeling and she couldn't be more in love with her beautiful wife.

They walked for almost thirty minutes until Maura noticed herself getting restless to go back. Jane drove them home and Maura got out of the car quickly, heading inside where Angela was sitting on the couch with a sleeping four-year old next to her.

"Hi," Maura greeted her softly, furrowing her brow when she looked at Anna's head in Angela's lap. "Is everything okay?"

"Hi, girls." Angela smiled, her hand resting on her granddaughter's head.

"Hi, Ma." Jane closed the door behind her and entered the room, stopping when she saw Anna. "She okay?"

"Everything is fine, she just had a bad dream and wanted her mommies."

"Oh sweetheart." Maura took off her coat, hung it in the closet and headed towards the couch, sitting on the edge of the coffee table as she looked at her daughter. She carefully reached out to caress the sleeping girl's cheek.

"When?" Jane asked, following her wife after putting her coat on the back of a chair.

"Two hours ago? Something like that, she's been sleeping like this for almost an hour." Angela smiled lovingly at Anna before looking up at her daughters. "Did you two have a good time?"

Maura nodded, feeling her wife sitting next to her. "Yes, it was lovely. The food was delicious."

"Got a little anxious to get back to the girls though." Jane smirked and stood up from her place on the coffee table. "Is Lily sleeping?"

"Yes, I put her down quite early so she'll be up for her feeding soon, I think."

"Hm, it's about time she sleeps through the night." Jane furrowed her brow and headed towards the kitchen to grab some drinks.

"She's about to," Maura replied, not taking her eyes off her sleeping daughter. "She slept through a night last week."

"Yeah and woke us op at six AM." Jane smirked, grabbing a beer from the fridge.

"It's a start!"

"She'll sleep full nights soon," Angela replied as she carefully lowered Anna's head on the couch to stand up. "You and your brothers did too at Lillian's age." She grabbed her coat from the closet and started putting it on.

"Wouldn't you like something to drink?" Maura asked, looking away from Anna.

"No thank you, I'm turning in." Angela smiled warmly and stepped towards Maura to kiss her cheek before doing the same with Jane.

"Thanks for tonight, Ma."

"You're very welcome." Angela zipped up her coat and grabbed her car keys. "Night girls!"

"Goodnight." Maura smiled at her mother-in-law and stood up from the table to carefully sit next to her sleeping daughter, gently running her fingers through her blond hair. "My pretty girl…" she whispered barely audible. "I'm sorry you had a bad dream." She pulled her hand back when she felt Anna sighing deeply in her sleep, afraid to wake her up but she stayed asleep.

"Want something to drink, Maur?"

Maura shook her head, not looking away from Anna. "No, thank you."

Jane chuckled, shaking her head as she looked for an opener for her beer.

Suddenly Anna let out a deep sigh and opened her eyes, looking up with small eyes. "Mommy?"

"Hi, honey." Maura smiled, brushing a strand of blond hair out of the girl's face.

Anna showed a tired smile and turned on her stomach before her eyes closed again.

"Did you have a bad dream?" Maura asked softly.

Anna nodded, too sleepy to answer.

"Grandma took good care of you, didn't she?"

"Yeah." She yawned and tucked her feet up, curling up on the couch. "'s Mama back too?"

"Yeah peanut, I'm right here." Jane walked around the couch and sat next to her daughter, leaning forward to place a kiss on top of Anna's head.

Anna smiled, content to have her parents back with her.

"Sleep, baby," Jane whispered quietly. "We're here. No more bad dreams. Tomorrow is a new day." She smiled and gently stroked the girl's cheek. "No more bad dreams."

"She should be in bed," Maura said softly.

"Hm, I like her here." Jane chuckled quietly as Maura relaxed against the back of the couch, feeling the exhaustion of a long day washing over her. Maura fell asleep before she realized what was happening, only waking up when Jane gently shook her shoulder, holding a wide-awake baby in her arms.

"I'm so sorry Maur," Jane whispered, careful not to wake Anna, "she's hungry."

Maura shook her head and rubbed the sleep out of her eyes. She gently took Lily in her arms, unbuttoning her blouse to start feeding the baby girl. She smiled lovingly at those dark baby eyes she loved so much, feeling Lily's small hand resting on the swell of her breast as the girl drank eagerly. She loved these moments. Yes, she wished for a full night sleep more than anything else but the skin on skin contact with her baby was so precious.

She kept the girl on her chest for a while longer until she got truly uncomfortable in her skirt and blouse. Jane took Anna in her arms to put her to bed while Maura carried a sleeping Lily upstairs, putting her in her own bed before the two women went themselves, falling asleep after only a few seconds.

The next morning, the sound of Lily's urgent cries woke them up a little before seven AM, too early for a free Sunday morning. Jane groaned and turned on her side to face her wife as Maura opened her eyes and sighed. "I'll get her," she mumbled before sliding out under the warm blankets and stepping into the cold air of the bedroom. She shivered and put on her robe and a pair of slippers while she headed for the baby room, hoping that Lily's cries wouldn't wake up Anna.

"Good morning, princess," Maura whispered at her screaming daughter, leaning down to lift her out of her bed. She adjusted Lily in her arms and sat down in the rocking chair in the corner of the room, unbuttoning the top of her silk pajamas to allow Lily to latch on.

She smiled as the early morning light caressed the baby's little face, highlighting pink cheeks and dark eyes. "Oh you're wide awake, aren't you?" she whispered quietly as she looked into big baby eyes. "You had a good sleep tonight, pretty girl." Maura smiled as Lily drank her breakfast like it was the first meal she had in years. "I'm proud of you. Letting your mommies sleep… You're a good girl." Her fingers brushed across Lily's cheek as the baby pulled away to take a breath, feeling a rush of cold air brushing across her skin. She shivered and adjusted the blanket around her baby girl.

"Mommy?" A sleepy voice quietly called out to her and Maura looked up to see her oldest daughter standing in the doorway, looking down at her bare feet as she fumbled with the hem of her pajama shirt.

"Good morning, honey." Maura smiled at the girl but her smile fell when she noticed how nervous she seemed. "Is something wrong?"

Anna looked at her mother and sister and hesitated for a moment before shaking her head and turning around.

"Anna," Maura called her back but felt Lily latching on again, making it impossible to stand up from her seat. "Anna, is everything okay?"

Anna didn't stop and answered with a quiet 'yes' before heading back out of the room, leaving Maura worried and concerned. She furrowed her brow and turned her attention back to Lily, hoping her daughter would finish her meal soon.

Fortunately, it didn't take too long for Lily to be satisfied. After burping her and quickly changing her diaper, Maura lifted the now contently purring baby in her arms and headed towards her wife. "Jane."

Jane groaned and slowly opened her eyes, turning to look at Maura and Lily. "Hm?"

"I think Anna is upset, I'm going to check on her. Can you take Lily?"

"Hm yeah," Jane mumbled, furrowing her brow as she sat up against the headboard, still waking up from her sleep. "Anna?"

Maura shrugged, carefully placing a kiss on top of Lily's head before handing her to Jane. "She seemed a little off."

Jane hummed and took Lily from her wife before relaxing with the little baby on her chest. "Give her a kiss from me," she mumbled as she closed her eyes and gently rubbed her hand along Lily's small back.

Maura nodded. "I will." She walked back out of the room, tightening her robe around her waist. Anna's bedroom door was closed. She usually didn't close her door. Maura furrowed her brow and slowly opened it, peaking her head through the small opening. "Anna?"

There was no reply and Maura didn't see her daughter. She walked into the room and saw that the covers on the bed were kicked away and a large wet spot stained the middle of the matrass. Maura sighed. "Oh, honey."

She suddenly heard a soft sniffle and turned her head to see Anna sitting in a corner of the room next to her closet. Her small knees were pulled up to her chest as she rested sideways against the wall, thick tears streaming down her face. "Sweetheart!" Maura kneeled in front of the little girl. "What's wrong?"

Anna's breath hitched in her throat. "I d-don't wanna s-s-say."

"Honey…" Maura gently tucked Anna's hair behind her ear, her heart breaking at the sight of her little girl so upset. "I won't get mad at you for having an accident. We'll get your sheets cleaned up and we'll take a shower and everything will be just fine."

Anna shook her head.

"It's okay, sweetheart," Maura whispered, tears burning in her eyes. "We're not mad." She carefully reached out and wiped the tears from Anna's pale cheeks. "How about we go get you cleaned up and go have breakfast, and then continue the story we started this week?"

Anna finally looked at her mother but she shook her head. "No."

"No?" Maura raised her eyebrows. "No story?"

Anna hiccupped and as a violent sob made it impossible to speak. Maura swallowed hard and pulled the girl into her arms, kissing the side of her head as she lifted her off the floor and pulled her ruined pajama pants off, tossing them away towards the hallway. She pulled Anna's underwear off with it and grabbed a blanket from the bed, putting it around the now shivering girl in her arms. "Shh, sweetheart," she whispered soothingly. "It's okay." She sat down on the edge of the bed, taking Anna in her lap. "What's wrong, honey?"

Anna shrugged, curling up in her mother's arms.

Maura searched her brain for an explanation. Wetting the bed… It could be a form of anxiety. Fear. Nightmares. Trauma. When did her little girl start getting panic attacks? Did she need therapy? Therapy for a four-year old? What if Anna experienced more trauma than they knew? What if it was more than they could handle? Maura felt close to panicking herself as she felt the four-year old crying in her arms.

As if she heard Maura's silent plea, Jane walked into the bedroom after a few seconds of silence. She furrowed her brow when she saw the clothes on the floor and Anna and Maura on the edge of the bed. "Hey, what's going on?"

Maura sighed deeply and shrugged her shoulders. "Bedwetting. That's all I know. Where's Lily?"

"Playpen." Jane looked at Anna and kneeled next to her wife and daughter. "Hey peanut," she whispered, gently brushing Anna's hair out of her face. "What's going on, huh?"

Anna shrugged again and let out a quiet sob. "I d-don't know."

Jane nodded and smiled sadly. Maura was still in the dark about what was bothering her daughter but Jane seemed to understand it. "You don't know," Jane whispered quietly. "You don't know what you're feeling but you're feeling so much and none of it makes sense, right?"

Anna turned her head on Maura's chest and looked at Jane. She nodded.

"You just got a new sister and all of the sudden Mommy and Mama are all busy with the baby, and they have less time for you." Jane wiped Anna's tears with the back of her hand as she spoke the words Anna couldn't find. "And I know you love your sister so much…"

Anna nodded again, looking intently at her mother on the floor.

"But it's so hard 'cause you just got used to how things were with your new mommies and now everything's changing again." Jane smiled and looked up at her wife for a short moment before turning her attention back to Anna. "That's okay, peanut. It's not easy. You're allowed to feel a little jealous every now and then. It's okay to be upset because Mama didn't have time to read you a whole story because Lily kept crying that night."

Maura felt her heart swelling with love as she listened to her wife's gentle words, her voice soft and husky and filled with love. She didn't know how Jane did it, but she managed to know exactly what was going on in Anna's head. While Maura was trying to come up with a diagnosis, a cure, Jane's trail of thought was simpler. More effective.

Anna looked away but Jane gently took the girl's chin in her hand to look into shimmering grey eyes. "You're still my peanut," she whispered with a smile. "That won't ever change. We still love you like crazy, just like before."

"With our whole hearts, remember?" Maura asked quietly, referring to a story she read her a while ago. It led to a conversation where Maura explained to her how much mothers loved their children and how they couldn't even explain how much she loved her, so she just said 'with my whole heart' because that was all she had. "That's not going to change, Anna. Never."

Anna sniffled, snuggling closer against her mother. She didn't reply and just cried quietly, her small hands reaching up to wipe the tears that kept on falling.

"You can always talk to us, baby," Jane added while she combed her fingers through Anna's messy bed-hair. "You don't have to be afraid to tell us what you feel. You can _always_ talk to us. We won't get mad or upset."

Anna nodded and reached out her arms towards Jane. Jane smiled and gently lifted the girl off Maura's lap, pulling her into her arms. "We love you so much, peanut," she whispered as she kissed the side of Anna's head. "So, so much."

"Loves you too, Mama," Anna replied quietly, her voice hoarse with tears. She turned her head on Jane's shoulder and looked at Maura, causing the blonde to put her hand over her heart as she looked into those beautiful grey eyes filled with tears.

"You too, Mommy," she whispered barely audible.

Maura held back a sob and nodded, smiling through her tears as she leaned forward to cup Anna's face and press a kiss to her forehead. "I love you too, baby. So very much."

Jane smiled at her wife before turning back to Anna. "Now how about we get your naked butt in some pants, huh?"

Anna giggled and wiped her wet cheeks. "Yeah."

"She needs a shower," Maura said while she stood up. "I'll clean up her bed."

Jane lifted Anna up, carrying the girl on her hip. Anna looked at Maura and rested her head on Jane's shoulder. "Sorry, Mommy."

Maura shook her head. "You don't have to be sorry, sweetheart. It was an accident." She kissed Anna's cheek and tickled her stomach. "Are you still saying no to a story?" she whispered into the girl's ear, eliciting a sweet giggle.

"No."

"That's what I thought." Maura chuckled and started pulling the blankets off Anna's bed.

"Alright, story time for the peanut coming up after shower and breakfast!" Jane smirked and put her hand on Maura's lower back to get her attention. She smiled and captured her lips in a quick kiss, whispering a quiet 'I love you' before taking Anna towards the bathroom.

Maura smiled to herself while she threw the wet blankets with Anna's pajamas, whispering an 'I love you too'.


	19. Chapter 19

_A/N Hello lovelies, thank you all so much for your amazing reviews! They really keep me going and motivate me to get the best out of this story. I'm taking another time jump with this chapter, mostly because I want to get to know Lily's personality a little more and see Anna growing up. Thank you for sticking with me and reading this story! Please let me know what you think and as always, I'd love to hear your input on storyline ideas!_

Chapter 19

Jane sat with her legs up on the couch, her back resting against the armrest as Anna sat in her lap, focusing intently on the fairytale book in front of her. Anna was a princess girl. She loved their stories, dresses and the magic that radiated from every fairytale. But most of all, she loved it when her mothers read stories. Especially Jane, because she did the voices. The stepmother had an evil, high, squeaking voice, the prince a low man-voice and the princess a sweet, singing voice.

Jane smiled every time Anna giggled, watching the girl tensing up at some parts, laughing at the funny parts and sucking her thumb as the story slowed down. The girl needed some time with her mama after that morning. Maura was called in to the morgue, much to her own disappointment, but she would be home soon. An emergency with some papers for the governor usually didn't take long. Lily was napping for a bit too long now, but Jane didn't want to wake her.

When she finished the story, she closed the book and put it away to wrap her arms tighter around Anna's stomach. Anna rested comfortably against Jane's front, contently sucking on her thumb. "I wanna be a princess too," she said with a small smile.

"Hm, you wanna sleep a hundred years?"

Anna giggled. "Nooo. You can't sleep hundreds years. Right?" 

Jane shook her head. "No, you can't."

"If you sleep, you can't eat. And you can't go to the bathroom. You's gonna explode!" Anna laughed at her own words.

Jane chuckled and tucked a strand of hair into Anna's ponytail. "Exactly."

"But… when you's asleep, everything's black. So you don't know when you explode." Anna furrowed her brow, lost in her own theorizing. "So maybe I _can_ sleep hundred years."

"But then what would we do, huh?" Jane asked with a kiss on the top of Anna's head. "For the next hundred years? We'd be nothing without you!"

Anna chuckled. "Noo."

"Yeah." Jane nodded, her smile slowly falling. "We can't be without you for a hundred years."

"You still has Lily if I'm sleeping for hundred years."

"Yeah but we'd be missing _you_." Jane brushed her fingers through Anna's hair and shifted the girl so she could look at her face. "And we'd have to clean up the mess when you explode!"

Anna giggled, looking into her mother's eyes as Jane cupped her chin.

"We're your mommies, baby," Jane said softly, turning serious again. "We love you like crazy and we never want to be without you."

Anna averted her gaze and smiled a small smile. "I'm gonna be with you and Mommy forever, right?"

"Yep. Forever and ever. Until you're an old, wrinkled lady."

A small laughed escaped the girl. "Then you and Mommy's gonna be old, wrinkled ladies too."

"Yep. Real old. And we'll still be your mommies."

Anna nodded and moved back to her original position against Jane's front. "But I'm not gonna be here when I'm old, 'cause people always gotta go away when they's grown up."

"Hm, yeah that's true. You're gonna go to college and move out of the house, but that's not for a reeeaally long time. And even if you do, we'll still be your mommies. Only… maybe we'll be Mom and Ma instead of Mommy and Mama."

Anna chuckled softly. "Mom and Ma?" She shook her head. "No, you's Mommy and Mama!"

"Right," Jane laughed. "You stay little as long as possible, peanut!"

 _Two years later_

"She's alright, Jane," Maura said with a smile as the two women waited in front of the car. "She probably had a great day. She was so excited!"

"Hm." Jane hummed, her brow furrowed as she tried to keep a squirmy two-year old on her hip. "She was nervous."

"Of course, it's her first day in first grade." Maura leaned back against the side of the car, the late summer sun falling on her face. "She's highly intelligent and logical. I have high hopes for her."

"It's first grade, Maur," Jane smirked. "She'll be writing her first word today."

"I know." Maura smiled a bright smile. "I'm so proud!"

"Mama, Mama!" Lily squirmed in Jane's arms, trying to get free.

"I know you want to run around baby, but there are too many cars here." Jane moved the little girl to her front and tickled her belly, hoping to occupy her for a while until Anna appeared.

Lily was growing more and more into a miniature Jane Rizzoli. Her black curls were long and messy, her eyes dark as chocolate and her temper fierce. Her sharp features would come as she grew up, for now she had adorably chubby cheeks. She had the most beautiful smile in the world and Jane would punch anyone that wouldn't agree with her for thinking she had the most gorgeous two-year old.

"Mama car!" Lily pointed towards the car.

"You want to go into the car?"

"No." Lily shook her head, her dark curls falling around her face.

Maura chuckled and brushed them behind the girl's ear. "Mama should have made you a ponytail today, sweetheart." She shifted and pressed a kiss on Lily's cheek.

"Mama was busy getting our daughter ready for school." Jane smirked as she pulled Lily to her chest, hoping to get the girl to calm down. "That daughter that insisted on a French braid at seven thirty AM."

Maura laughed. "It looked quite… Special."

Jane was about to make a snarky comment when she heard a familiar voice call out to them. "Mommies!"

Maura shot her attention towards the entrance of the school and smiled brightly. She kneeled down and opened her arms for Anna who came running towards them, almost knocking Maura over as she wrapped her short arms around her mother's neck. "Hi, sweetheart," Maura whispered, pulling Anna close in her arms. "How was your first day?"

"Good." Anna hid her face into the crook of Maura's neck and snuggled impossibly closer. The girl was fully comfortable and had opened up to her family but she was still shy at nature. A day with all new people and a new environment was a challenge and it exhausted her to the bone.

Maura lifted Anna up from the ground and hugged her into her arms, turning towards Jane to allow her to kiss Anna's cheek. "Hey, peanut."

"Anna!" Lily reached out her chubby arms towards her sister and bounced on Jane's hip.

Anna smiled at her sister but didn't move from Jane's arms. "I learned math today, Mommy."

"You did?" Maura smiled proudly and pulled back to look at her little girl.

Anna nodded. "Yep. We can add almost up to ten."

"You're a genius, just like your mom!" Jane squeezed Anna's leg that was wrapped around Maura's waist, the girl being tall enough now to hook her ankles together on Maura's back.

"How about we go home to those cookies you and Grandma made yesterday?" Maura asked softly, smiling as she tucked a strand of loose hair into Anna's braid.

"Cookies!" Lily started bouncing again and Jane had trouble keeping her up.

She laughed and opened the car door. "Good idea." She put Lily into her car seat and watched Anna buckling up in the backseat while Maura sat behind the wheel to drive them home.

Back home, Lily sped off towards her toys with her usual energy as Jane sat down on the couch, opening her arms for Anna who just put her new backpack away. Anna smiled and ran off towards her mother, jumping on the couch and into Jane's arms. "Did you have fun, peanut?"

Anna nodded, moving to snuggle into her mother's arms. She let out a big yawn as her thumb snuck into her mouth. She was exhausted. "Morgan and I are best friends now," she said with a slight smile. "We decided today."

"You did?" Jane smiled, thinking about the one friend Anna had. Morgan was one of the sweetest girls Jane had ever met. She was a little older than Anna and talked about anything and nothing, like her mouth never stopped for a second. She was polite and she cared for Anna and Jane grew quite attached to her daughter's friend.

"Yep."

"Well, she's welcome to come play again soon!" Maura said from the kitchen where she was preparing drinks and fruit for the girls. "It has been a while."

"Yeah 'cause her Daddy got in the hospital again."

"Again?" Jane furrowed her brow, looking at her oldest daughter in her lap. "That's like the third time this year, isn't it?"

Anna shrugged.

"Do you know why?" Maura asked, handing a banana to the girl.

Anna shook her head, looking up at Maura from Jane's chest. "No. But Morgan says he's gonna be back soon."

"Oh, good." Jane helped Anna to peel her banana, thinking about the strange family Morgan was growing up in. Her mother was a small, but fierce woman that never really talked to them. They had only met her father once, very briefly. Morgan's sister Rachel was the one that usually picked her up from play dates, even though Rachel was only twelve years old. They took the bus together, no matter how many times Maura or Jane insisted on driving them. Morgan always visited them, Anna never visited Morgan. For the two years that Anna and Morgan were friends now, they really hadn't gotten to know much about her family. But the most important thing was that Anna found a true friend in Morgan.

"Banana!" Lily bounced towards Maura who had cut up her banana.

Maura hummed and smiled, motioning the toddler towards her while she sat in the armchair. Lily ran off on her short legs and tried to climb into her mother's lap. Jane chuckled as she watched her wife pulling the little girl up in her arms.

"Banana nom nom?" Lily reached out her hands towards the bowl in Maura's hands.

"Yes, baby. Banana. You love banana." Maura smiled and pulled Lily sideways into her arms, watching her picking the pieces of banana with her fingers.

Jane brushed her hand through Anna's hair and saw that she was lazily biting the last of her banana, her eyes seeming to close already. Jane chuckled softly and took the banana peel from her daughter, putting it on the table behind the couch before pulling Anna impossibly closer and kissing the top of her head. "I'm proud of you for doing so well in school, peanut."

Anna just hummed.

"Why don't you close your eyes for a bit?" Jane whispered quietly. "Take some rest before dinner, hm?"

The little girl was already gone. Her eyes closed, her mouth hung open as her breathing steadied against Jane's chest. Jane smiled. She really was proud of her daughter. She was growing up. She wasn't the quiet, scared girl she was when they first met her. She had her own little character and that was a beautiful, sweet, caring little girl that was shy and scared of new people, and liked to hang out in a familiar environment where she was most comfortable.

Anna was the opposite of Lily. Lily talked to strangers, was a bolt of energy and seemed to be running around all day until she went to bed. She was kind and caring though, even at only two years old. She wanted the people around her to be happy. These rare moments where she simply sat in Maura's lap eating a banana were precious and unique.

The Rizzoli-Isles girls were quite a handful. They were the most beautiful girls on the planet, fitting together like yin and yang. Blonde and brunette, shy and outgoing, fast and steady. Just like their mothers. And they turned out to be a perfect match.


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

"Look, elephants!" Morgan jumped up and down and pointed in the direction of the elephants at the zoo they were visiting. "Can we go?"

Maura chuckled as she pushed the stroller with Lily in it. "Yes, but stay where we can see you!" she called after the girl who was already pulling Anna along with her.

They followed the girls towards the elephants, watching the enormous animals throwing with sand. Anna and Morgan stood next to each other, pointing at the elephants, giggling when they did something funny.

"It's like they have a giant penis on their face. Never fails to entertain." Jane smirked as she wrapped her arm around Maura's shoulders.

"God, Jane." Maura laughed and shook her head. "Watch your language."

"Penis?" 

"Jane!" She slapped her wife's arm and playfully pushed her away.

"Mama, up!" Lily squirmed in her seat, reaching out her arms towards her mothers. "Up! Up!"

Maura sighed. Lily wanted nothing more than to run around all day long, but they would lose the girl in less than a second if they allowed her out of the stroller. She was faster than any two-year-old should be.

Jane unbuckled the little girl from her seat and lifted her in her arms. "You stay with Mama, okay?" she said as she placed Lily on her hip. "We don't want you running around getting lost."

"Am not!" Lily wrapped one of her short arms around Jane's neck as she looked at the elephants.

Jane chuckled. "Yeah, before we know it you'll be swimming with the penguins."

"Oh don't even bring up that image." Maura shook her head, smiling when she watched Anna laughing at something her best friend said. Just the mere thought of losing one of her children broke her heart. Her little girls were the single most important thing in her life and that would never change.

Morgan came pretty close to it too. The fierce, cheerful and sweet girl was locked in their hearts. Maura watched Anna's blond hair that was tied into a French braid and Morgan's brown hair that was falling around her shoulders in two pigtails. They were a cute pair. They fit together. Anna was quiet and shy and Morgan was outgoing and cheerful, but always considerate of others. She would never put Anna in an uncomfortable position and was content walking Anna's slow pace.

"Mommy, why does the elephants throw sand up like that?" Anna turned her head to look at her mother, raising her eyebrows.

"Well," Maura smiled and let go of the stroller to kneel next to her little girl, "they throw dust on themselves to protect themselves from the sun and insects, and to keep cool."

Anna furrowed her brow. "From the sun?"

"Yes." 

Morgan giggled. "But they have grey skin! They can't get burned!"

"No, but they have to keep cool." Maura smiled at Morgan and felt Anna leaning into her side, her arm wrapping around her mother's neck. "And do you see all those flies over there?"

"Yeah." Morgan nodded, strands of brown hair falling around her face. "They's gross."

"Yes, and that's why the elephants make them go away by throwing sand on themselves." Maura saw the look of interest on Morgan's face, her cheeks pink with excitement. The girl had never been to a zoo before and she was having the time of her life.

"My mommy knows everything." Anna pushed out her chest and straightened her back as she grinned proudly at her friend.

Maura laughed and pressed a kiss to her daughter's temple. "Not everything, honey."

"But _almost_ everything." Anna tilted her head and looked up at Jane. "Right, Mama?"

"That's right, peanut. She's the most brilliant doctor in the world."

"My daddy says doctors are real smart," Morgan said while she looked at Jane. "'Cause they make people better."

"I don't quite… make people better, I'm forensic scientist and a medical examiner. I work on deceased victims of homicide-…"

"Maur." Jane smiled lovingly at her wife as she stroked Morgan's hair in front of her. "No details please. Don't want to traumatize any kids today."

Maura's smile fell and she nodded her head. She got better everyday but sometimes it was difficult to transfer all the information in her brain to a first-grade level. "I'm a special kind of doctor," Maura explained instead. "I don't work in a hospital."

"Not?" Morgan raised her eyebrows.

Maura shook her head.

"The doctors in the hospital made my daddy better. Mommy says they took good care of him."

"That's what doctors do." Maura smiled and tucked a strand of loose hair behind Morgan's ear. Morgan's father somehow spent a lot of time at the hospital, and no one really knew why. She had asked once but the reply wasn't clear. Morgan's family was secretive and Morgan herself didn't even know what was going on half the time.

"How about we go see how the giraffes are doing?" Jane asked, adjusting Lily on her hip.

"Yeah!" Morgan jumped up and started running off.

"Not so far!" Jane called her back. "Stay close, okay?"

Morgan stopped and waited for the family to catch up, Maura pushing a now empty stroller while Jane carried Lily in her arms. After the giraffes, they visited the big aquarium and they saw everything. People were leaving and the place got quieter and quieter. The day was ending and the three girls were getting pretty tired, so they decided to leave.

"Morgan? Anna?" Maura stopped and turned to look at the girls. "Would you both like to pick something from the gift shop?"

Anna's face lit up with a bright smile. "Can we?"

"Yes, you can." Maura smiled and caressed Anna's cheek. "Check the price tags and make sure it's not more than ten dollars, okay?"

Anna headed off towards the gift store, holding Jane's hand as they talked about what she wanted to get. Maura expected Morgan to follow but when she looked behind her she saw the little girl looking down at her feet and fumbling with her T-shirt.

"What's wrong, Morgan?"

Morgan shrugged and her bottom lip quivered.

"Hey." Maura smiled reassuringly and kneeled in front of her, gently brushing her hair back. "What's wrong, honey?"

"Mommy got mad when you got me a gift last time," she said softly. "She threw the coloring book away." 

Maura furrowed her brow as she watched a tear trickling down Morgan's cheek. "She threw it away?"

Morgan nodded, wiping her cheek with the back of her hand. Her family had trouble getting to the end of the month every time, Maura knew. Their money problems were huge. But to take a present away from a child… That hurt.

"She says I can't take gifts from you anymore." Morgan sniffled, her breath hitching in her throat. She was just a child. Presents were important to a six-year old. No matter how expensive they were, it was the idea that counted for them. Last time Maura brought home two coloring books, one with princesses for Anna and one with Disney characters for Morgan. It couldn't have been more than five dollars total. And yet it was apparently too much.

Maura sighed deeply and wrapped the little girl up in a sweet hug, making sure to hold the stroller with her free hand. Morgan buried herself in the embrace as she sniffled softly until Maura pulled back and wiped Morgan's wet cheeks. "How about you and Anna pick out something together?" she asked softly. "That way it's a present for both of you and you can play with it every time you come visit."

Morgan nodded, the idea of picking out a present after all cheering her up. She sighed and swallowed the last of her tears. "Thank you."

"You're welcome, sweetheart." Maura patted Morgan's back. "Now go before Anna picks something on her own!"

Morgan giggled and ran towards the small shop, calling out her friend's name. "Anna! We gets to pick out together!"

"Really?" Anna smiled at her friend and pointed at a shelf. "I like the dolphins 'cause they can make the sounds, but also the elephants 'cause they're soft."

Jane walked towards her wife with a smile on her face, holding a small stuffed penguin. "For Lil."

Maura smiled. "You can't help yourself, can you?"

"Nope." Jane chuckled and smiled lovingly at the little girl that was almost sleeping in the stroller, exhausted from all the excitement of that day.

"The girls are picking out something together." Maura sighed. "Morgan said she's not allowed to take presents from us anymore."

"What?"

"She said her mother threw the coloring book away last time."

"What?" Jane repeated, a little louder. "That's stupid!"

Maura shrugged and turned her attention back to Anna and Morgan.

Jane sighed and shook her head. "I guess it's hard for them. Morgan's dad's unemployed, they're probably having trouble tying the ends together. We have all we need."

"But it's such a small present and it makes Morgan so happy."

"I know." Jane pressed a kiss on her wife's temple and squeezed her side. "Good safe to let them pick something for the both of them."

"Thank you." Maura chuckled and watched the girls discussing their present. After a while, they decided on a small plastic lion that could walk on its own after you wind it up. The girls were giggling as they tried it out, catching it as the toy walked off the shelf.

Maura paid for the gifts and the small family got in the car to start the drive back home, grabbing some dinner on the way. Anna and Morgan played with the lion the entire drive, letting it walk on every single surface available including other people. Maura simple enjoyed the sound of their soft giggles, the girls suppressing them to avoid waking Lily who was sleeping in her car seat. The sun was setting on a perfect day.

The first stop was to drop Morgan off at her own house in a small neighborhood next to a Boston trailer park. Their house was small and old and seemed to be getting worse every week as Maura knocked on the front door, holding Morgan's hand as they waited for someone to open. It was her sister Rachel.

"Hi." She smiled at Maura before looking down at her sister. "Did you have a good time at the zoo?"

"Real good time!" Morgan nodded, showing a big smile.

"Thanks for taking her," Rachel said, brushing her hand through her hair, piercing blue eyes looking at Maura before turning to wave at Jane in the car, who was watching Lily.

"We had a wonderful time."

"My uhm…" Rachel looked down and pulled something out of her jeans pocket. "My mom wanted me to give you this." She offered a twenty-dollar bill.

"Oh, no." Maura shook her head, denying the money. "That's not necessary. We're happy to have her!"

"My mom insists."

Maura sighed, looking at the young girl in front of her. "It's not necessary, Rachel."

"Please take it." Rachel had suddenly tears in her eyes as she almost pleaded the woman in front of her. "My mom's gonna be mad if you don't."

"Mad?" Maura furrowed her brow. She was simply trying to be kind. Morgan's family needed the money more than they did.

The car door opened and Jane headed towards them, wondering what was taking so long. When she saw Rachel with the money, she smiled slightly. "Hi, Rachel."

Rachel just smiled at the tall brunette, trying to hide her tears.

Maura felt a small hand tugging on her blouse and looked down to see Morgan looking up at her with wide eyes. "You gotta take it, Mrs. Isles," she said softly. "Mommy's gonna be mad." Her expression turned to fear and Maura felt a hint of worry in her stomach.

"I can't…" Maura said softly, shaking her head again. She knew these twenty dollars were worth a lot for this family. For her, taking the children to the zoo was just another day. For this family, it was something they could only dream of. She didn't want them to pay for it.

"Just take it." Rachel swallowed hard, tears still shimmering in her eyes. "Please?"

"Maur." Jane placed her hand on her wife's lower back. "Take it."

Maura sighed deeply. "Will you please tell your mother that we really don't mind taking Morgan and paying for her?"

Rachel nodded, handing the money to Maura as she finally took it. "Thank you."

Jane smiled and squeezed her wife's arm. "You're welcome."

Maura sighed and gently stroked Morgan's head, looking down at her daughter's friend. "We hope to see you around soon again, Morgan."

Morgan looked up at the blonde and smiled. "Yeah. Thanks for the zoo, Mrs. Isles en Rizzoli."

Maura chuckled. "You can call us Maura and Jane, remember?"

"Thanks for the zoo, Jane and Maura."

"You're very welcome, honey."

"See you next time, Morgan!" Jane waved at the little girl and took Anna's hand in hers.

"See ya Monday?" Anna asked her friend.

Morgan nodded, stepping towards her sister. "Yep. Bye!"

Rachel smiled at them, said her goodbyes and closed the door behind her as she walked inside. Maura sighed, composing herself for a second before heading towards the car to join her family.

Back home, Maura took Lily out of her cat seat and cradled the sleeping girl to her chest, placing a gentle kiss on top of her head. She loved these moments. These rare moments where she could just hold her little girl close to her. She carefully took off Lily's jeans and started changing her diaper until she woke up.

"Mama…?"

"No, it's Mommy sweetheart." Maura smiled and pressed a kiss to Lily's forehead while she threw the dirty diaper away. She brushed her fingers through the girl's oh so familiar dark curls, looking into those dark eyes she loved so much. "Did you have a good day today?"

Lily nodded, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand. "Lions."

"Yes, we saw lions today." Maura grabbed a fresh diaper and lifted the girl's bottom to put it on. She loved this, it reminded her of the time Lily was a baby. It was a hectic time for all of them but she wouldn't have missed it for the world. Especially going back to work was a challenge for the doctor. The first day she left baby Lily with Angela to get back to the forensic lab, she was a mess. She contaminated two DNA samples, she almost ruined an autopsy and her focus was off. It took her a few weeks to get back into it. She finally found a balance when they decided to hire another medical examiner so they could work together.

"Bed, Mommy?" Lily asked while she suppressed a big yawn.

"Yes, my love. It's time for bed." Maura lifted her daughter in her arms and covered her chubby cheek in kisses. "Is my beautiful girl ready for a good night sleep?"

Lily didn't reply and snuggled into her mother's chest, too tired to come up with an answer. Maura chuckled and handed the girl her pacifier before tucking her in. She leaned down to press a loving kiss to Lily's forehead as she watched her dark eyes slowly closing in exhaustion. "I love you, sweetheart," Maura whispered. "Sleep well."

Back downstairs, Anna was lazily playing with her new toy at the dinner table, her head resting on her arm. Maura smiled at the sight and caressed the girl's hair. "It was a busy day, wasn't it?"

"Hm." Anna nodded, winding up the toy again. "Why was Morgan's sister sad?"

Maura sighed and looked at Jane in the living room. Jane smiled sadly and put Lily's jacket away before heading towards the dinner table. "It made her a little uncomfortable that we paid for Morgan's ticket and dinner today."

"Why?" Anna furrowed her brow, lifting her head to look at her mother.

Jane shrugged and took a seat next to her daughter. "It feels unfair to her."

Anna frowned and looked intently at her mother. "But… It's not unfair to take Morgan to the zoo, right?"

Maura shook her head and lifted Anna into her lap, taking her seat in the chair. "No, it's not. But when other people always pay for you, it gets unfair. So Morgan's mother wanted to pay for once."

"Oh." Anna nodded and rested sideways in her mother's arms. "But Morgan says they don't have any money."

"Yes." Maura brushed Anna's blond hair back and rested her chin on top of her daughter's head. "But you know, money is not important."

"Yeah." Anna nodded her head. "Morgan's my best friend."

Jane smiled. "And that's what matters."

"Yep. We're gonna be friends forever." She snuggled in warm arms, pulling her knees up to her chest as she sucked her thumb into her mouth.

"I think it's about bedtime for you, pretty girl," Maura whispered as she gently rocked Anna back and forth. "Do you want me or Mama to take you?"

"Mama, she's gotta finish the story from yesterday."

Jane chuckled and stood up from her seat. "Could've seen that one coming. Alright peanut, bedtime!"

Maura pulled her little girl impossibly closer and placed a loving kiss on her temple. "I love you, baby. With all my heart."

"Love you too."

"Kiss." Maura smiled and cupped Anna's cheek to peck her lips before letting her go. "Sleep well, honey."

"Night, Mommy."


	21. Chapter 21

Chapter 21

Jane's fingers traced across her wife's bare back, feeling her soft, freckled skin under her fingertips as they both tried to regulate their breathing after an hour of passion and love. She smiled when she felt Maura's hand gently caressing her chest, her thumb brushing across her collarbone. After years of marriage, the fire was still there. Maura could make her feel loved with just a look, make her heart flutter with just a smile and her body explode with just a touch. She loved how gentle Maura was. She was never rough or rushed, always caring and sweet. Her beautiful hazel eyes always sparkled with love and it made the butterflies in Jane's stomach dance as usual.

Life had been rushed lately. A heartbreaking case had been keeping both of them at work until the late hours of the day, leaving them both physically and emotionally exhausted and missing the girls. Especially Anna missed them. Lily was cheerful as ever and was content spending her afternoons with Angela, but Anna was creeping into her shell. She was doing amazingly well in school; her teacher was over the moon about the bright little girl. She was reading and writing well above her level. She had Maura's intelligence, even though there was no biological connection. As soon as Anna could read well enough to read books, Jane knew she would devour them, just like her mother. Jane couldn't be more proud.

"What are you thinking about, my love?" Maura whispered, her breath tickling Jane's neck.

Her hand reached up to tangle her fingers in soft blond hair as Jane gently massaged her wife's scalp. "The girls."

"Hm. It's good we have a few days off next week, for Anna especially."

"Yeah. She's been a little off, hasn't she?"

Maura nodded slowly and sighed. "She's been unusually quiet."

"She's gonna be okay though, right?" Jane furrowed her brow in concern.

"I think she will be fine. We'll catch up on snuggles next week."

Jane chuckled and kissed her wife's temple. "You and your snuggles."

Maura laughed and lifted her head, supporting herself on her elbow. "I would have never expected to turn into the mother I am today," she whispered quietly.

"The most amazing mother on the planet?"

"No." Maura shook her head, her lips curling up into a sweet smile. "I mean… The physical affection I give and receive from our children. My parents were very reserved, and I was never comfortable with physical touch until you came along… But it comes so naturally now."

Jane nodded as she smiled lovingly, looking up at her lover in the dark. "It _is_ natural. They're lucky to have you, Maur."

"I think it's the combination of both of us that makes them lucky." Maura continued her loving strokes on Jane's chest during a moment of silence before moving up to cup her cheek. "You turned into quite the snuggle mom as well, Jane."

"I-… N-, okay but let's at least pretend I'm still badass, alright?" Jane smirked.

"You are!" Maura laughed and leaned down to capture her lips in a sweet kiss. "A badass," she kissed her again, "sweet," kiss, "protective, caring," kiss, "mushy, amazing, awesome mother and wife."

Maura's soft kisses were spurring on fresh butterflies in Jane's stomach and she pulled her wife down to her lips to deepen the kiss and tighten the embrace. Maura chuckled into the kiss and moved her hands across Jane's sides and up to her breasts, squeezing softly. Jane moaned and felt a hint of arousal tickling her stomach as she quickly flipped them around so she could straddle the blonde, smirking down at her beautiful wife. "I love you."

That Sunday was finally the day Jane and Maura would start their short time off work to spend time with the girls and Anna was over the moon about it. She already made Maura read her two stories where she read the easy words herself and Maura filled in the difficult words while Jane played with Lily and her Lego. They built castles and houses and skyscrapers together and Jane fell more and more in love with her little girl with every second they spent together.

"Can I have the yellow one?" Jane asked, holding out her hand to take a yellow Lego piece. "We can use it for the headlight of the car!"

"Car!" Lily nodded and handed Jane the yellow piece. "Mommy car?"

"No, waaaay cooler than Mommy's car." Jane smirked and looked at her wife on the couch, eliciting a glare from the blonde. She winked at her and pursed her lips. "A cool car."

"Cool car." Lily grinned and nodded her head, agreeing with her mother.

The little girl never failed to amaze Jane. She saw herself in Lily. She saw her own fierceness, her own stubbornness and her physical appearance. But what she loved most about her youngest daughter was that she was her own little person. She wasn't a copy of Jane Rizzoli, she was unique and special. She was softer than Jane and already more sensitive. Her smile always brightened up Jane's entire world, chocolate brown eyes sparkling just like her mother's. Her dark curls were a bit lighter than Jane's, but just as unruly. Maura insisted on a haircut so it wouldn't tangle as bad as it did, but it was still quite long and usually tied up into a ponytail or held back with a headband.

Maura sat on the couch with Anna in her lap as she tied the girl's long blond hair into a beautiful French braid. It was a sweet moment of closeness between the two and Maura wore a loving smile on her face as she enjoyed the perfect family moment.

After a few more blissful moments, a loud knock on the door interrupted them. Jane caressed Lily's curls before standing up from the floor to open the front door. "You expecting someone?" she asked her wife.

"No." Maura shook her head as she gently rubbed Anna's stomach in her lap.

Jane opened the door and her mouth fell open when she saw Morgan and her sister Rachel standing outside. Rachel was holding a wet cloth against her head and her lip was bleeding. She was holding Morgan's hand as the girl looked up at Jane with wide eyes, streaks of leftover tears on her cheeks. "What's going on?" Jane asked, opening the door for the girls.

"Rachel's hurt." Morgan's breath hitched in her throat and she looked at Maura on the couch.

"I-I'm s-so sorry," Rachel stuttered, "I don't want to interrupt but Morgan said you're a doctor, Mrs. Isles and-… And…"

Maura lifted Anna off her lap and hurried towards the young teenager, her brow furrowed in concern. "What happened, Rachel?"

Rachel averted her gaze. "Bumped my head," she mumbled quietly.

Maura hummed and pursed her lips, not believing what Rachel said. She decided to step past it and examine the girl. "Okay, come here." She gently took Rachel's arm and led her towards the kitchen, sitting her down on one of the stools at the kitchen counter. "Do you have a headache?"

Rachel nodded slightly. "A little bit, yeah."

"Hm." She grabbed her medical bag from the closet and took out a small light, shining it in Rachel's blue eyes. "Are you dizzy or nauseated?"

"No."

"Good." Maura smiled reassuringly and turned off her light. "Let me see your head," she said softly as she took the cloth away. "It's not too bad. Did you keep it cool?"

"Yeah, but the cloth warmed up when we came here."

"How'd you get here?" Jane asked, unable to stop herself from finding out what happened. Something was not right.

"We took the bus." Morgan answered for her sister as she stood next to Maura, looking up at Rachel with concern in her eyes.

"Jane, can you grab me some ice?"

Jane did as she asked while Maura continued to examine Rachel, concluding that nothing was truly wrong. "Rachel, I think it would be good for you to visit the hospital."

Rachel shook her head and tears appeared in her eyes. "I can't."

"Okay." Jane was through with it and took a seat next to the teenager, her detective mode taking over. "What happened?"

"I can't say." Rachel fumbled with her hands in her lap.

Maura took the hint and gently grabbed Morgan's hand to lead her towards the living room, distracting her with something to drink and the Lego Lily was playing with. Jane turned her attention back to Rachel and raised her eyebrows. "Who hurt you, Rachel?"

Rachel swallowed hard and shook her head. "I can't say."

"You don't think I'm gonna find out? I'm a cop, Rachel. And a darn good one. So you can either tell me what's going on and let me help you, or I'm going to find out myself and make sure someone else is going to help you."

Tears spilled from Rachel's eyes as she looked up at the detective. She didn't reply. Jane knew what was going on. This happened at home. How, she didn't know. But something was not right in that family, something was very wrong and somehow Rachel was a victim of it. She wouldn't be surprised if Morgan was too and she felt a lump in her throat when she thought about it. Jane reached out and took Rachel's fumbling hands in hers, squeezing gently. "Who did this, Rachel?"

Rachel took a deep breath and braced herself to answer. "My… M-my mom."

Jane closed her eyes. Her mom. She couldn't even imagine intentionally hurting her own children in any way possible. How can someone hurt their own child? How can someone be so actively evil? Jane couldn't even think of it. Her children in pain meant that she was in pain. She looked at the teenager in front of her and her heart broke. She saw so much hurt in her eyes, so much defeat in her entire being. Like she gave up hope, like there was nothing good left in her world. Like she was broken.

"Rachel?!" Morgan hurried towards her sister. "What did you say? You can't say!"

Rachel shook her head, tears streaming down her face now. "Sorry, Morgan."

"You's bad!" Morgan started to cry, a helpless little girl looking up at her older sister. "Mommy's gonna be mad!"

"She can help us," Rachel whispered.

Morgan shook her head and was about to reply when Maura came towards them, kneeling in front of the little girl. "Jane is a police officer, remember?" she said softly, her eyes shimmering with tears. "It's not okay for your mommy to do bad things to you. We're going to help you. I promise."

A flood of tears escaped from Morgan's eyes. "Oh, honey." Maura gently took her in her arms and hugged her tight, taking her back to the living room to comfort her.

"How long has this been going on?" Jane asked softly, still holding Rachel's hands in hers.

Rachel shrugged. "Since Morgan was little."

"Has she ever hurt you before?"

"Usually it's just my dad," Rachel whispered, her cheeks reddening with shame as she looked down at the floor. "I got hurt a few times before but not like this. Usually she just yells at us."

"You have to go to the police, Rachel," Jane said softly, smiling reassuringly.

"You're the police, aren't you?"

"Yeah but I'm a homicide detective so unless she kills you I can't really help you." She smiled sadly and reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind Rachel's ear. "But I can help you to get to the right people and make sure we do this discreetly and carefully."

"I can't tell anyone," Rachel whispered as she looked up at Jane. "She'll actually kill me. Or take it out on Dad."

Jane shook her head. "No, honey. I'll make sure that won't happen. I promise."

"You promise?"

"I promise." She smiled and stood up to open her arms for the young girl, happy to see her standing up and accepting the sweet hug, her skinny arms wrapping around Jane's waist as she tried to swallow her tears.

"I don't know what to do," Rachel whispered, her voice hoarse with tears.

"We're going to help you and your family, Rachel. No matter what." Jane pulled back and gently wiped Rachel's tears with the back of her hand.

"Just help my dad," she said softly. "It's so unfair for him."

Jane nodded. "It'll be over soon."

In the living room, Maura was sitting on the couch with Anna in her lap and Morgan leaning into her side while she softly continued reading the story to distract the little girls from the events in the kitchen. Lily was occupied with her Lego castle and didn't notice any of it, fortunately.

"We're gonna call the police and report this," Jane pointed at the injury on Rachel's head and lip, deciding to be honest with her. "And you're going to tell the officer exactly what happened. There will be a lawsuit and your mother will probably lose access to you and Morgan until there's a final verdict. You'll stay with your dad and the case will have to decide what happens to custody on both of you."

Rachel nodded, listening intently. "Okay."

"I can go with you if you want to."

"Please."

"Okay." Jane smiled and caressed Rachel's cheek for a second. "But first you're going to have something to drink and sit down for a bit. Okay?"

Rachel chuckled. "Yeah." She stood up to head towards the living room, but Jane stopped her by grabbing her arm.

"Rachel."

"Hm?"

"You're very brave."

Rachel blushed and shook her head. "Thank you." She walked towards the living room and sat down next to her sister, smiling shyly when Maura looked at her and reached over to squeeze her arm. Morgan immediately moved from Maura's side to snuggle against her sister.

"Are you okay?" Morgan whispered, looking up at her sister.

Rachel shrugged, smiling sadly. "I will be."

When Maura ended the story, Jane handed the girls something to drink and motioned her wife to follow her towards the kitchen to get her caught up on what Rachel told her. Maura sighed deeply and had tears in her eyes by the time Jane finished the story.

"God…" Maura looked at the four girls in the living room and sighed.

"I always knew something was up with that family but I never expected this."

Maura shook her head. "Poor girls. How… How can a mother do that to her own child?"

"I have no idea." Jane sighed. "We're gonna help them, Maur." She cupped her wife's cheek and looked into her eyes. "We can help them."

"I know." She sighed and wrapped her arm around Jane's waist, resting her head on her wife's shoulder as she leaned into her side. "Is Rachel okay?"

Jane took a deep breath and shook her head. No. She wasn't okay. And neither was Morgan. Or Anna. Their worlds were shaken up. They weren't okay, not right now. But they would be. "She will be," Jane answered, smiling sadly as she watched Rachel interacting with Lily on the floor. "We will be."


	22. Chapter 22

Chapter 22

"Would you like some tea, Rachel?" Maura asked as she welcomed the teenager in their home. "Or something else? I have juice? Apple? Orange?"

"Apple is fine." Rachel smiled shyly and sat down at the dinner table, watching her little sister Morgan playing with Anna in the living room. Jane was at work and Lily was still taking her afternoon nap, so Maura had time to catch up with Rachel who had been spending more and more time with them lately.

"How are things at home?" Maura asked softly as she sat down next to Rachel, handing her a glass while she wrapped her hands around her warm mug of tea.

Rachel shrugged. "Kinda weird, now that mom's gone."

"I can imagine."

"My dad's gonna work less hours at the car shop." Rachel smiled and looked into her glass. "Which is sad 'cause he just found that job a few months ago but he wants to have more time for us."

"I understand." Maura smiled, looking at the young girl in front of her. She looked like her sister. They had the same brown hair, blue eyes and olive skin. Rachel was mature for a twelve-year-old but Maura knew she was still a little girl deep down. She had to be more mature than she really was. "How is he?"

"Good." Rachel nodded. "He uhm… He was really mad at me at first for talking to you and Mrs. Rizzoli."

"Jane."

"What?"

"You can call us Jane and Maura," Maura said with a chuckle. "We told you that, didn't we?"

Rachel blushed and fumbled with her glass. "Yes." She smiled and looked back up at Maura. "Anyway, he was mad at first but after a while he calmed down and Jane convinced him to talk to the police and they took my mom before she-… before she could hurt anyone."

Maura saw the attitude of the young girl changing, her shoulders dropping, her eyes becoming dull.

"So now she's gone," Rachel sighed deeply. "And a lot of lawyers are talking about us… And… Jane says she's probably not going to be back."

"Hm." Maura nodded slowly, examining the girl in front of her. "How do you feel about that?"

Rachel shrugged. "I don't know. Morgan's doing better though. She's not as afraid as she was before."

Maura smiled. "That's great."

"Yeah. She's doing better in school too, my dad told me."

"Rachel," Maura said softly, leaning forward to look into Rachel's eyes, "how are _you_ doing?"

Rachel took a deep breath and averted her gaze. "I don't know," she whispered quietly. "Everything's changing."

"Are you talking to anyone?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean… Are you talking to anyone about how you are feeling? About everything you're going through?"

Rachel hesitated for a moment before she shook her head. "No. Well-… Except for now."

Maura smiled and gently took Rachel's hand in hers, squeezing softly. "You're very strong, Rachel."

"I-… I f-feel like I should be happy," she whispered carefully. "I wanted her to be gone for so long and now she's gone and I don't feel happy at all."

Maura nodded. "Things are overwhelming. It's completely normal and healthy to take the time to figure out your feelings."

"Yeah… Takes long."

Maura chuckled softly and squeezed Rachel's hand. "You take as much time as you need, honey. The more the better. Don't rush anything."

Rachel was about to reply when the front door opened and Jane came in, smiling brightly as she saw the house full of people. "Hi, guys."

"Mama!" Anna jumped up from the floor where she was playing with her dolls and ran towards her mother, reaching up her arms towards the tall brunette. Maura hoped she would never stop greeting them like that as she watched Jane lifting the little girl in her arms, pressing kisses on her cheek.

"Hi, peanut." Jane smirked and caressed Morgan's hair as she passed her on her way to the kitchen. "How you doing, Morgan?"

"Good!" Morgan was busy feeding one of Anna's doll and didn't move her attention away from it.

Jane chuckled and adjusted Anna on her hip, the girl's short arms wrapping around her neck. "Hi," Jane whispered while she leaned down to capture her wife's lips in a quick kiss.

Maura smiled at her beautiful wife, loving her pink cheeks after a day of adrenaline and stress, her sparkling dark eyes and unruly curls so similar to Lily's. "How was your day?"

"Good, it's just a matter of getting the results from the lab so we can take him in." Jane turned towards Rachel and squeezed her shoulder. "How are you, Rach?"

"I'm good." Rachel shrugged. "Could be better, I think."

"Hm." Jane sat down on the edge of the dinner table, moving Anna to her front to give her a squeezing hug while she looked at the teenager. "Are you staying for dinner?"

Rachel shook her head. "No, thank you. Dad says we're gotta be home for dinner." She smiled politely. "He's looking for a new house and he wants to talk to us about it tonight."

"A new house?"

"Yeah. We can't afford this one anymore." Rachel's expression dropped and she looked down at her lap.

Maura sighed, feeling Rachel's hand moving away from hers.

"Do you know where you're going yet?"

Rachel shrugged. "No. Dad just told me I maybe have to share a bedroom with Morgan." She smiled sadly and looked up. "But that's okay. We'll be fine."

Maura slowly reached out and brushed Rachel's brown hair out of her face, smiling sweetly at the young girl. "Yes, you will." She caressed her cheek and looked into shimmering blue eyes. "We'll be here for you, Rachel."

"Yeah we have a spare room," Jane said with a smirk as Anna's head snuggled into the crook of her neck. "Y'know, if you get tired of your sister."

Rachel laughed and drank the last of her juice. "I don't think that's gonna happen." She put her glass on the table and smiled at the women. "Thanks, though."

"You're welcome."

She looked at the clock on the wall and sighed. "We really have to go."

"Let me drive you," Maura said softly. "I don't like you and Morgan taking the bus."

"It's okay." Rachel shrugged. "We don't mind."

"I do." Maura smiled at the girl. "I'd feel a lot better if I knew you and Morgan were safe in my car."

"The bus is safe. We always take the bus."

Maura sighed deeply. She knew it was her own choice, they couldn't force her.

"Hey," Jane turned toward the both of them, "I need to go grocery shopping for dinner anyway. I might as well drop you off, I'm passing right by the neighborhood."

"You are?"

Jane nodded but Maura knew she wasn't quite speaking the truth. Morgan and Rachel's house was pretty far from the grocery store they usually went to.

Rachel shrugged and hesitated for a few moments before nodding her head. "Okay then."

"Good." Jane winked at Maura and kissed Anna's cheek before putting her down on the floor.

"Do you have to go?" Anna asked as Rachel stood up from her seat.

"Yeah. Morgan, you coming?"

"Aw, really?" Morgan pouted as she stood up from her place on the floor.

"Sorry. Jane's driving us."

"Yay! In the police car?" Morgan jumped excitedly, loving all the parts and interesting bits of the cop car.

"Of course." Jane smiled and waited for the girls to get their stuff together. Rachel zipped up her jacket and was about to follow Jane out of the front door before she turned around and hurried towards Maura who stood in the kitchen. She stood up on her toes and wrapped her arms around Maura's neck for a sweet hug.

Maura smiled and pulled the young girl close. "Bye, honey. It's going to be okay."

Rachel nodded against Maura's shoulder, mumbling a quiet 'thank you' before quickly turning around and passing Anna to follow Jane to the car. Maura took a breath to compose herself while she walked towards the front door, picking Anna up in her arms while the girl waved at her friend.

"Bye!" Morgan waved over her shoulder before climbing into the car.

Maura chuckled at the cheerful girl, pulling Anna close and kissing her temple. "You had a good time today, didn't you?"

Anna nodded and snuggled herself against her mother, exhausted after a day of school and playing. Maura hummed contently and closed the front door.

"Mommy?"

"Yes, sweetheart?"

"How long do you think Morgan's gonna be sad?"

Maura sighed deeply and sat down in one of the chairs, taking her little girl in her lap. "Is Morgan sad?"

Anna nodded, moving to snuggle sideways into her mother's front. "Yeah. She cried at school today."

Maura hummed. "How come?"

"Rick asked why her mommy's not picking her up anymore and Morgan said her mommy's gone and he wanna know why and then Morgan got mad." Anna sighed and furrowed her brow as she stared at her hands in her lap.

Maura immediately felt bad. She noticed Anna was a little off after school today, but she hadn't had enough time to ask her about it. This must have been the reason. "What happened after that?" she asked softly.

Anna shrugged. "I said we gotta go away from Rick and Morgan cried but then she got better."

"That was a very smart thing to do, honey."

"I gave her a hug." Anna looked up at her mother and smiled slightly. "'Cause that's what you and Mama do when I or Lily cries."

Maura smiled proudly, brushing Anna's loose blond curls behind her ear. "And it helps every time, doesn't it?" she whispered.

Anna nodded and moved back into a comfortable position in her mother's lap. "Yeah."

"You have been an amazing friend today, Anna," Maura said softly as she kissed the top of her daughter's head. "I'm proud of you."

"Really?" Anna's eyes sparkled as she smiled at her mother.

Maura chuckled and pulled her little girl close. "Yes, sweetheart. So proud."

Anna smiled contently and sucked on her thumb, a habit they hadn't been able to break, while the girl relaxed against her mother until an urgent cry came from upstairs.

"Mamaaaaa!" 

"Hm, sounds like your sister is awake, baby!" Maura sighed and lifted Anna off her lap. "Let me go get her." She stood up, kissed the top of Anna's head and headed towards the stairs to get her youngest daughter out of bed. Her nap had taken way too long and Maura knew she would have trouble putting the little girl to bed that night.

"Maaaaama!" Lily called from her room.

"I'm here!" Maura opened the door and smiled at the little girl who was sitting up in her bed. "Hi, pretty girl." She smiled and lifted Lily up in her arms, kissing the side of her head. "You had a long sleep, didn't you?"

Lily snuggled against her mother, her dark curls messier than ever as they tickled Maura's skin. "Mommy kiss."

Maura chuckled and cupped Lily's chin to peck her lips before moving her to her front to give the little girl a squeezing hug. "Hm, I love you, baby girl."

"You too!" Lily allowed her mother to hug her for only a split second before she squirmed out of her arms and hopped on the floor, immediately taking off.

"Hold on!" Maura stopped her by grabbing her arm. "Put on pants and socks, please."

"No!"

"Yes."

"No!"

"Stop that, young lady." Maura pursed her lips and looked sternly at her stubborn little girl. "Socks and pants. Now."

Lily averted her gaze and knew she shouldn't push on. She allowed Maura to help her into a pair of jeans and put on red dotted socks before squirming away again. Maura chuckled and scooped the girl up in her arms before she could storm off the stairs and injure herself, carrying her daughter downstairs. As soon as she stepped off the last step, Lily wiggled herself free and took off towards her sister.

"Anna play!" She jumped up and down in front of the six-year old that was browsing through one of the books she just started to be able to read.

Anna sighed deeply, clearly too tired for her energetic little sister.

"Anna is tired, honey," Maura said softly. "Maybe you should play on your own for a bit."

Lily looked up at her mother and furrowed her dark brow. "No." She shook her head. "Anna, play!"

"Want me to read you a story?" Anna offered her little sister.

Lily hesitated for a second, looking at her toys in the corner of the room before shrugging her shoulders and climbing up in the chair next to Anna. "'Kay."

Maura slowly walked into the kitchen, putting her hand over her heart as she witnessed her two daughters snuggled up in the big chair, Lily totally at ease suddenly. Anna struggled with the book, having a hard time with reading her first words, but Lily listened intently.

"Dog?" she asked, pointing at a picture in the book.

"Yeah, that's a dog." Anna nodded. "His name's Spot."

"Spot?"

"Yep."

Lily giggled softly and rested her head against Anna's upper arm, her dark curls mingling with Anna's blond locks, like two opposites that worked perfect together.

After a few moments of just the sound of Anna's voice, the front door opened and Maura motioned her wife to be quiet, pointing at their daughters. Jane smiled at the sight and placed a careful kiss on each of the girl's head before putting down the groceries she bought. 

"Hi, my babies," she whispered.

Lily looked up and waved but quickly turned her attention back to the book but Anna reached out her arm and pursed her lips, silently asking for a kiss which Jane happily gave her. She chuckled and caressed their cheeks before heading towards her wife in the kitchen. "Hey, gorgeous."

"Hi." Maura smiled and captured Jane's lips in a loving kiss, wrapping her arms around the detective's waist as they both looked at the girls in the living room. "Did Rachel and Morgan get home okay?"

"Yeah. How long have they been sitting like that?"

"About ten minutes. I'm surprised Lily is managing to sit still this long," Maura whispered with a slight chuckle. "She was all energy when she woke up."

"Sounds familiar." Jane smirked and tightened her arms around her wife's shoulders, softly kissing her temple. "They're gorgeous, aren't they?" she whispered. "We're so lucky."

Maura hummed and leaned into the brunette's side, resting her head on her shoulder. "Yes, we are." She wrapped her other arm around Jane's waist as well and kissed the bottom of her jaw. "I never knew it was possible to feel this kind of love until I became a mother."

"Overwhelming, huh?"

Maura nodded. "Very. Earth shattering."

"Scary."

Maura lifted her head to look at her wife. "Still?"

Jane shrugged, not looking away from the girls in the chair. "Gets scarier everyday. I mean…" she sighed and smiled slightly. "They grow up. That's the scariest part."

"Letting them go." Maura smiled and brushed her hand through her wife's curls. "They're only two and six. It'll be a while before we send them off to college."

"Don't even mention it," Jane mumbled with a smirk. "First grade was already too much."

Maura chuckled and kissed Jane's jaw. "I hate how fast they are growing up but at the same time… I love witnessing it more than anything else. I love watching them growing taller and more mature, I love watching their personalities develop and grow… I love how Lily is so much like you and I can't wait to watch her grow into the girl she will be. I love how intelligent and caring Anna is and I want nothing more than to guide them through life and make sure they hold on to their innocence and kindness as long as possible."

"Maur…"

"I love them." Maura smiled up at her wife. "More than I could ever know."

"Me too." Jane looked at her wife with adoration and love before she captured her lips in a sweet kiss. "And you too. More than I could ever know."

"I love you too," she whispered quietly. "So much."

"Mommy?" Anna interrupted them just as she was about to kiss her wife again. "Mommy, I don't know this word."

Maura smiled, pecked her wife's lips and walked towards her little girls to help out with the story. She got Anna on track again for the last few pages and watched them while she felt overwhelming, unconditional love swelling her heart. Her little girls. Her yin and yang. Her everything.

 _A/N Another fluff-filled chapter as a bit of a filler before some bigger stuff is happening. I don't know how long this story will be yet, but right now I think I can go on for a while longer as long as you all like to read it._ _Please let me know your thoughts and feelings about this chapter and if you want me to keep writing more chapters!_


	23. Chapter 23

_A/N You are all so lovely! Thank you so, so much for your kind reviews! This will definitely keep me going for a while. :D_

 _I wrote some crime into this story, which is not my strongest point so I apologize for any technicalities that I got wrong. I think the crime adds a nice twist to the story, though. Let me know what you think!_

Chapter 23

"Okay, so we have a dead woman with a note stitched to her chest that says 'Rizzoli'." Jane paced back and forth through the squad room. "No evidence at the crime scene so far, stabbed in the throat. Clean murder."

"Jane, this is a direct threat at your address." Korsak lifted his hand at his colleague and furrowed his brow in concern.

"Which is why we have to solve this case!" Jane said a little more angrily than she anticipated. "There's gotta be something!"

"Does Maura know about this?"

"No!" Jane shot her attention towards Korsak, aware of the fire that spit from her eyes. "Don't you dare tell her, Vince."

"Jane." Korsak stood up and sat on the edge of his desk to look at Jane. "She can help. She'll find out sooner or later anyway."

"No." Jane shook her head. "I won't let her."

Korsak sighed deeply. "You can't hide this from her. It'll only hurt her more."

"Not as much as it would hurt her to know about this!" Jane felt tears burning in her eyes and angrily swallowed them. She didn't want to cry. She couldn't. She couldn't break. She had to catch this killer as soon as possible and make sure she was out of danger. She had to protect her family.

They found the body that morning, Jane was called into work early and they found the small note when they moved the dead woman's jacket away. It was stitched to her chest and had the word 'Rizzoli' written on it. In black marker. Just a single word. Rizzoli.

The note was currently being processed by the crime lab. The body was in the morgue waiting for a medical examiner to arrive for the autopsy. It couldn't be Maura. They had to solve this case as soon as possible without Maura finding out. She would be concerned beyond belief. She wouldn't sleep or eat and she would have to hold back her tears as they kissed goodbye before Jane went off to work. She didn't want her wife to be in pain. If there was any way to prevent that, she would. No matter what it took. They would solve this, find the person who's behind this, get them arrested and everything would be over. Just another killer, just another case.

She didn't realize Korsak was talking to her until she heard him calling out her name. "Jane!"

"Yeah?"

"I was asking you about your latest threat e-mails."

Jane shrugged and continued her pacing. "I get those all the time, you know that."

"We have to go through all of them." Korsak sighed and stood back up to sit behind his desk. "Give me a list of the latest trials you've testified in and I'll go through those while we wait for the lab. Alright?"

Jane sighed deeply and rubbed her forehead. She stopped pacing and nodded her head, her stomach hurting, her lungs struggling to breathe. She had to keep going. She composed herself and sat behind her desk, running her hand through her hair as she turned on her computer. It would be a long day.

Six hours later, they still had nothing. Absolutely, positively nothing. Jane was frustrated and tired of suppressing her feelings as she went down to the café to get herself some food. She stopped in her tracks when she saw familiar blond curls disappearing into the elevator. No, no, no… What was Maura doing at BPD? Wasn't she supposed to be with the girls? Jane was about to bolt when Maura turned around the press the button and saw Jane in the café. She knew.

"Jane!" She hurried towards her wife and harshly pulled her behind a wall to get some privacy before hitting her arm. "How could you not tell me?!"

"Maur…"

"How could you, Jane?" Maura was fighting to keep her voice down but she was screaming internally, Jane knew. "What were you thinking? You were just going to keep this from me? You're in danger!"

"I-…"

"Yeah yeah you didn't want to make me worry and you don't want me to be in pain," Maura looked at her wife with anger in her eyes, "But this is pain, Jane!"

Tears spilled on Jane's cheek as she couldn't contain them anymore. "I'm sorry, Maur," she whispered hoarsely. "I'm sorry."

Maura nodded and took a deep breath to compose herself before wrapping her arms around her wife's neck, squeezing her close. "You're in danger, my love," she whispered through her tears.

Jane nodded. She was. There was no use in denying it anymore. Her arms wrapped around the blonde's waist and she hid her face into the crook of her wife's neck. "We'll catch this one, Maura."

Maura nodded her head and pulled back to look at her wife. "Are the lab results back yet?"

"No-, wait how did you find out?"

Maura smiled and gently wiped her wife's wet cheeks with the back of her hand. "You're not the only one with mad skills, detective." She chuckled and kissed Jane's lips. "One of the lab techs called me to ask me about a problem. He told me."

Jane groaned.

"It's better like this, Jane," Maura whispered. "We shouldn't keep things from each other like this."

"I just wanted to protect you."

"I know." Maura nodded and leaned forward to kiss her wife's lips. "I know, my love."

"I'm sorry, Maura."

"I'm sorry for hitting you."

"Yeah, that hurt!" Jane smirked and pinched her wife's arm.

Maura gasped and stepped back to push the button of the elevator again. "Have you eaten today?"

"Breakfast."

"Lunch?"

"Nope."

Maura reached into her purse and got out a small package, handing it to Jane. "Eat this, don't let it sit out."

"Yes, ma'am."

Maura shook her head, smiling lovingly at her wife.

"Where are the girls, by the way?"

"With your mother, I told them I'd be home for bedtime."

Jane nodded. She missed her girls. She wanted nothing more than to be home to put them to bed, read them a story and give them kisses. But she didn't see that happening for that night, and it turned out she was right.

The crime lab found no fingerprints on the note, and could only determine that the word 'Rizzoli' was written with a common black marker that could have been bought in basically every store in America. The woman was stabbed with a small knife, but the weapon was nowhere to be found. They didn't know what the note towards Jane meant. It could have been a warning, it could have been a message, a threat… No one knew. There were a lot of people in Boston that wanted to hurt Jane.

Just as Jane was about to head home after an excruciating day, Frost stopped her. "Jane!"

"Yeah?"

"The lab found DNA."

"What?" Jane's eyes went wide as she followed her partner towards his computer. "Do you have a name? Did you run it?"

"Katherine Albertson." Frost typed in the name and stared at the results that appeared on the screen in front of him. "Damn."

"She just got out of jail? Abuse, drunk driving, one more abuse, drug dealing…" Jane raised her eyebrows. "Damn indeed."

"No permanent home address," Frost said as he looked through the lists on his screen. "Few motels…"

"Can you track her credit card?"

"Working on it." Frost's fingers typed faster than Jane could think and before she knew it, he had credit card records on his screen. "Her last payment was last year." He groaned. "Before she was arrested."

Jane sighed deeply and rubbed her forehead. "Katherine Albertson… I've never heard that name before."

"Well she's heard yours, that's for sure."

"Yeah." Jane pursed her lips and sat on the edge of an empty desk. The place was empty, everyone had gone home by now. "Where did you find the DNA?"

"On the victim's clothes," Frost answered as he kept typing and staring at his computer screen.

"So that doesn't prove she's the killer."

"No, but it ties her to the victim. That's more than we've had so far."

"Does she have any ties to the victim? Jocelyn?"

Frost scrolled through a page and shook his head. "Not so far. I'm working on it."

"Jocelyn was a completely normal, boring administration worker at a depressing office," Jane thought out loud. "Seems unlikely that she's somehow connected to a criminal, right?"

Frost nodded his head but didn't reply.

Jane groaned and rested her head into her hands. She was too tired to think.

"Why don't you go home, Jane?" Frost asked softly.

"I can't."

"Get some sleep. Come back in the morning, we'll continue then."

Jane shook her head and stood up from her chair. "We have to get her. Interrogate her."

"First thing tomorrow."

Jane sighed. She knew it was for the best. And honestly, she wanted to go to her girls. Her wife. Home. "First thing," she pointed at her partner and grabbed her jacket from the back of her chair.

Frost smiled, proud of his achievement of sending Jane home. "See ya tomorrow, partner."

"Bye." Jane smiled at him and headed out, feeling the exhaustion burning in her muscles as she walked towards her car and drove home.

She walked through the front door and saw Maura sitting on the couch with Anna in her lap. The girl was sleeping and Maura had her eyes closed as her chin rested on top of Anna's head. She opened her eyes as soon as she heard the front door. "Hi."

"Hey." Jane smiled and put away her jacket and the car keys before sitting next to the blonde and kissing her lips. "Why's she here?" she asked, pointing at Anna.

Maura sighed deeply. "She missed her mama."

Jane swallowed a lump in her throat and furrowed her brow. Anna sensed the tension in the house. She sensed Maura's concern and took it with her. Jane gently reached out and smoothed her daughter's ash blond hair, staring at the beautiful little girl she was so proud to call her daughter.

"Did you find anything?" Maura whispered as she cupped Jane's cheek and stroked her thumb across her cheekbone.

Jane nodded. "DNA but we haven't connected her to the victim yet."

"The DNA from the victim's jacket?"

"Yeah." She sighed and closed her eyes for a moment. "I just-… I just want to let it go for a while… Can we… Can we not talk about it? Just for now?"

Maura nodded and reached up to press her lips against her wife's forehead. "Of course, my love."

"There are extra uniforms patrolling around the house tonight," Jane whispered as she looked back at Anna. "Keeping an eye on things."

"Good."

"Mama?" Anna opened her eyes and let out a deep breath as she looked up at Jane.

"Hi, peanut." Jane smiled when Anna reached out her little arms towards her mother, yawning as she climbed into her lap. Jane pulled her into her arms and kissed the side of her head. "Mama's here, honey," she whispered. "Everything's okay. Mama's home."


	24. Chapter 24

Chapter 24

"Maura!" Jane stormed into the autopsy room, startling her wife as she was knuckle deep into a victim's chest.

Maura gasped and shot her attention towards her wife, almost dropping the heart she had in her hands. "God, Jane."

"Sorry."

She sighed and carefully took out the organ, placing it in its container before taking off her gloves and stepping towards her wife to give her a quick kiss. "What's up?"

"We gotta go to Anna's school, c'mon." 

Maura furrowed her brow. "What?"

Jane was already out of the room and Maura hurried after her. "Jane!"

Jane turned around to look at her wife, desperation showing in her dark eyes. "Some guy tried to attack her. Teacher saw it and got her away. We gotta go."

"God." Maura slipped on her heels, informed one of the techs she would be leaving, grabbed her purse and followed her wife, not bothering to change out of her black scrubs. "What did he do? Is she okay?"

Jane nodded as she pressed the button of the elevator. "She's okay."

Tears filled Maura's eyes as she stepped into the elevator. "Jane," she whispered, looking at her wife who was pacing nervously around in the small space. "Jane!"

"What?"

"Please." She felt tears running down her cheeks and sniffled as she looked up at her wife with pleading eyes. "What happened to our little girl?"

Jane shook her head, looking down at her feet. "I don't know."

Maura's arms wrapped around her wife's neck and she pulled her close, resting her head into the crook of Jane's neck. "Is she in pain?"

"No," Jane whispered as she squeezed her arms around Maura's waist. "Her teacher said she's okay. Just a little shaken up but he got to her in time."

"God she must be so afraid." Maura pulled back when the elevator doors opened and the women walked out of the elevator to head towards the car.

Jane was too focused, Maura saw it. She was in her detective mode and that meant her wife mode was a little absent, which Maura understood but she still needed her wife. Jane drove too fast but no matter how Maura tried, she couldn't slow her down. She needed to protect her child.

When they arrived at Anna's school, they hurried through the brightly colored hallways towards the office in the back. Maura saw long blond curls through the small window and familiar grey eyes looking at her when she opened the door.

"Mommy," Anna whimpered and slid off the chair to run towards her mother.

"Oh, sweetheart." Maura kneeled in front of her little girl and pulled her into her arms, pulling her as close as possible. She saw streaks of tears on her daughter's cheeks and felt her shaking against her. "My sweet girl… Are you in pain?" Maura lifted Anna up in her arms and pulled back to look at her daughter. "Are you hurt?"

Anna shook her head as her breath hitched in her throat. "N-no."

"Where's your teacher?"

"G-getting drinks." Anna hiccupped and hid her face into Maura's shoulder.

"Hey, peanut," Jane whispered as she stepped towards her wife and daughter, gently wiping the girl's cheeks with the back of her hand. "We're here, baby. You don't have to be afraid anymore."

Maura smiled lovingly at her wife, placing her hand on the back of Anna's head to keep her close. The detective Rizzoli-mode was gone and her mommy-mode stepped in. In this moment, Jane was the mother Anna needed her to be and Maura was beyond proud of her.

After a short moment of silence, Anna's teacher walked in, an older man called George. He was a good teacher for the little girl. He had the wisdom of an old man but he was able to adjust himself to the level of a first-grader and he provided Anna the extra challenges she needed in school. He was the one that saved her today.

"Hi," Jane smiled at him and shook his hand. Maura just nodded her head at him, not wanting to let go of the crying girl in her arms.

"Hello." He smiled at them, his lips curling up under his grey moustache. "Your daughter had quite a scare today." He motioned towards the chairs, silently asking them to sit down as she sat behind his desk, sliding a cup of lemonade towards Anna.

"What happened?" Jane sat down in one of the chairs.

George sighed. "She was at the playground, playing tag, right Anna?"

Anna nodded against Maura's chest as the blonde sat down in the chair next to her wife. "Yeah."

"People are not allowed inside the fences of the playground but we've had a broken fence for a few days now. Reparation is planned for this weekend. The young man somehow got a hold of her when she was out of sight of the other children and he dragged her away."

Maura closed her eyes and pulled her daughter close in her arms. Someone got to her little girl. Someone tried to hurt her.

"Did you get him?"

"Yes." George smiled reassuringly. "The police took him in for questioning."

"He's at BPD?" Jane's eyes went wide and she immediately became restless. She wanted to interrogate this man until he broke.

"I suppose so, yes." He nodded.

"How did you get Anna away from him?" Maura asked, her hand gently brushing across Anna's back, feeling the girl shivering in her arms.

"A boy from a higher grade saw it and called out. I got to her in time and he let go of her."

"But you didn't let him escape." Jane smiled and nodded her head. "You should think about joining the force, Mr. Peters."

George laughed and shook his head. "My place is here, Mrs. Rizzoli."

"Thank you." Jane tilted her head and her lips curled up into a slight smile.

He shrugged. "I'm simply doing my job."

Maura looked at her little girl in her lap and saw that her tears were slowly drying as her small fingers played with the hem of her black scrubs. She furrowed her brow when she saw a sliver of paper in the pocket of her daughter's yellow skirt. She carefully got it out and her heart skipped a beat.

'Rizzoli.'

"Jane." Maura showed the small note to her wife and saw her wife's detective-mode taking over in less than a second.

Jane took the note and stood up from her seat, taking a deep breath to compose herself. She had to go.

"Go," Maura smiled and squeezed her arm. "Get him."

Jane nodded and smiled at Anna's teacher. "I'm sorry, I have to get back to BPD."

"Of course."

"Thank you again." She leaned down to cup Anna's chin to give her a kiss. "Mama's gotta go back to work, peanut. We're going to catch this guy, okay?"

Anna nodded. "Put him in prison?"

"Yeah." Jane smiled and nodded her head. "We're going to make sure he never ever comes close to you ever again."

"Okay."

"Bye, baby."

"Be safe, Mama." Anna snuggled back into Maura's chest, completely exhausted.

Jane squeezed Maura's arm and headed out of the office, getting out her phone to call someone to drive her. She had to do her job as a detective now that Maura was here to do her job as Anna's mother.

They talked a little longer to Anna's teacher and decided Maura would take the girl with her instead of letting her finish her day at school. She carried Anna on her hip as they walked out of the school, the girl's short arms wrapping around her mother's neck.

"Mommy?"

"Hm?"

"Are we gonna go home?"

Maura kissed the side of Anna's head as she stepped into the sunlight. "I have to finish up a few things at work so we'll stop by the police station quickly, okay? Then we're going to pick up Lily and go home."

Anna nodded against her mother. "Okay."

The whole thing took about two and a half hours before Maura walked into the house, carrying Lily on her hip and holding Anna's hand in hers. She nuzzled her nose into Lily's dark curls and kissed the side of her head before the girl squirmed away and sped off towards her box of toys to spread them out across the floor.

Maura chuckled, shaking her head at the sight before she looked at her oldest daughter to see the girl standing in the middle of the room, her shoulders dropped, her hands falling along her sides. Her smile fell and she hooked her arms under Anna's to lift her in her arms.

"You must have been so scared today," she whispered as she sat down in a chair, taking Anna in her lap.

Anna nodded. "He was really strong," she replied softly. "He said I gotta be quiet and don't move."

Maura's brow furrowed as she brushed her hand through her daughter's blond hair, looking at those beautiful grey eyes staring in the distance.

"But I screamed."

"You did a good job, sweetheart."

"Mr. Peters pushed him away from me and he tried to run but Mr. Peters stopped him and then the other teachers came and I had to go inside." Anna spoke softly, her voice weak and laced with exhaustion. "I had to cry a lot." Suddenly tears strangled her voice as the girl took a shaky breath.

Maura sighed deeply and pulled her daughter up to her chest, hugging her close. "My baby…"

"Is he gone, Mommy?"

"Yes, honey. He's gone." Maura pulled back and cupped Anna's chin to look into her daughter's eyes. "Mama is going to make sure he gets punished for what he did."

Anna nodded and leaned forward to hide her face back into her mother's chest, relishing in her warmth and softness. "He's bad."

"Yes, he is," Maura whispered while she pulled her little girl close. "He's gone, pretty girl. You're safe, he didn't hurt you. Mama and I are going to keep you safe."

Anna sniffled against her mother and reached up to grab the black shirt she was still wearing as part of her autopsy outfit. Maura kissed the top of the girl's head. "Rest, baby," she whispered. "Mommy's here."

It only took a few minutes before Anna was sleeping in her mother's arms, totally exhausted by fear and nerves. Lily sensed the uneasiness in the room and was playing quietly with her blocks in the corner of the room, building a tower that kept falling down.

After a few minutes of silence, Maura's phone buzzed and she grabbed it to see her wife's face smiling up at her. "Hi. Any news?"

"Yeah." Jane sounded exhausted and defeated, a tone Maura didn't like to hear in the detective's husky voice. "He's the stupidest guy I've ever met. Like, seriously."

"What do you mean?"

"Just dumb. He was just following orders."

"What orders?"

Jane took a deep, shuttering breath and Maura heard a lump in her throat as she answered. "To kill Anna."

Maura closed her eyes and unconsciously pulled her sleeping daughter close in her arms. Someone tried to kill her daughter. Someone was given the order to take her away from them. But even worse, someone _gave_ the order. Someone out there wanted to hurt Jane in the deepest way possible. Someone out there wanted to ruin her life, wanted her to be in as much pain as humanly possible. By killing her child. An innocent child. _Her_ child.

"Assignment failed of course, so he's pretty pissed."

"Who gave the order?" Maura asked, her voice nothing more than a quiet whisper.

Jane sighed. "Katherine Albertson."

"The suspect from the first case?"

"Yeah." Jane sounded like she was pacing through a big room but at this she stopped and stood still. "Someone wants to get to me, Maur," she said softly. "The first victim was just a message before the big thing."

Maura nodded, not even realizing that Jane couldn't see that on the phone. "But you still haven't found a connection between you and the first victim, right? Was it just a random killing? Just to send a message to you?"

"Looks like it, yeah."

"Who can be behind this?"

Jane stayed silent for a few moments before taking a deep breath. "We have no idea."

Maura gently brushed her hand across Anna's back and carefully rested her chin on top of the girl's head. "Are you under protection?" she asked softly. "There are still officers patrolling around the house."

"I'm at BPD, Maur."

"Still."

"Yeah. Extra security and all. The whole team is on it."

"Good." Maura nodded her head. "Be safe, Jane."

"I will. How's Anna?"

"Sleeping." Maura smiled down at her sleeping daughter. "And the other one is playing like an angel. Things are fine here. Go back to the case, we'll be okay."

Jane kept silent for a second before she answered with a smile in her voice. "I love you. Give the girls a kiss from me."

"I will. I love you too."

Jane was caught up at work until the late hours of the evening. Maura was just about to go to bed when she heard the front door opening downstairs. Jane thanked a few officers and turned to see Maura standing in the doorway of the kitchen. The detective looked absolutely exhausted. Dark circles under her eyes. Pale skin. Hair frizzy, hands shaking.

"My love…"

Jane shook her head and threw her car keys on the kitchen island. "We found it. The connection."

Maura raised her eyebrows. "And?"

"Katherine Albertson is behind all this. She gave the guy the order to attack Anna, she killed the first victim and attached the note with my name on it."

Maura nodded, waiting for the heavy ball to drop. She saw in her wife's dark eyes that this hit her hard.

"Katherine Albertson was in prison. She just got out a few weeks ago." Jane sighed and her voice shook as she continued. "She could have gotten orders from someone within that same prison."

"Who?"

Jane lifted her head to look into Maura's eyes. "She was in the same prison as Janet Matthews. Morgan and Rachel's mother."


	25. Chapter 25

Chapter 25

Janet Matthews wanted revenge. Jane was the one that got her arrested for domestic abuse. Jane was the key in the case. Jane was the one who encouraged Rachel to speak up. So Janet wanted to hurt Jane in the deepest way possible. Jane couldn't think about it. She couldn't think about what would have happened if her plan succeeded; if they never found the killer of the first victim and only perceived a threat in the form of a small note that said 'Rizzoli' and then a few days later found Anna dead. She couldn't bring up that image in her mind. It would break her. Just the thought of losing one of her children nearly tore her apart.

Morgan and Rachel's mother added years and years to her sentence in jail and the man that attacked Anna turned out to be her boyfriend. They all got orders from her. She had them whipped, she was the boss in all of this. How? Jane didn't know. She gave orders from inside of prison. Maybe she used threats. Promised them drugs. Money. They had no idea. The team was still working on it, but Jane was sent home by Cavanaugh that day. She could barely walk straight, that's how exhausted she was.

She was lying in bed but she was too afraid to close her eyes. She knew the nightmares would be excruciating and she would wake up panicked, soaked with sweat and tears. No sleep was better. She slid out of bed, careful not to wake her sleeping wife before heading down the hallway towards her daughter's room. She had to see them. She leaned down to look at Lily, seeing dark curls splayed out on a white pillow in the dark, the girl's fists resting next to her head as she slept peacefully. The way Lily's chest moved up and down soothed her as she listened to the sound of her soft breaths. They were safe. Patrol officers were still looking after the house, just in case. Everything was safe and secure.

When she felt her knees hurting from kneeling, she stood up and carefully closed Lily's bedroom door when she heard soft whimpers coming from Anna's bedroom. She opened the door and saw her daughter tossing and turning in bed, her brow furrowed as sweat trickled down the girl's temple. Jane wasn't the only one with nightmares.

"Baby." Jane sat down on the edge of the bed and gently shook Anna's shoulder. "Wake up, peanut. It's just a dream."

Anna shot up in bed, her eyes suddenly wide with fear as she panted and looked at her mother. "Mama!"

"Shh, I'm here baby." Jane gently moved Anna to lie back down and took her place next to her daughter, pulling her into her side as the girl rested her head on her mother's chest. "Mama's here, no one is going to hurt you. It was just a dream."

"He was chasing me, Mama," Anna whimpered through her tears. "He got me."

"It was just a dream." Jane kissed the side of Anna's head. "It wasn't real, baby."

Anna nodded against her mother as her eyes slowly closed again. "He's gone, right Mama?"

"Yeah, peanut. Forever."

"'Cause you put him in prison."

"Exactly."

"You're a good police," Anna said softly while she slowly drifted back to sleep. "The best in the world."

Jane smiled sadly and pulled her girl close into her side, feeling her back falling asleep in her arms. If only she were the best detective in the world. This would have never happened if she were the best at her job. She failed. She failed her family and that killed her. But at the same time, it delighted her that Anna saw her as 'the best police in the world'. It meant that she felt safe and protected with her and she wanted nothing more for her children.

She listened to the sound of her daughter's steady breaths and took comfort in the way she felt the girl against her. When she was absolutely sure Anna would be down for the night, she carefully untangled herself and got out of the small bed, heading back to her wife. She tried to be careful and quiet when she got back in bed behind her wife, but Maura woke up anyway.

"Jane?"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to wake you," Jane whispered. "Go back to sleep."

Maura hummed and turned around to face her wife, her head resting on her bent arm. She smiled, placing her hand on Jane's cheek as she traced her cheekbone with her thumb.

"Anna had a nightmare," Jane said softly.

"Hm. The second one already."

"Not that surprising."

Maura shook her head. "My love…" she whispered. "You're not sleeping."

Jane averted her gaze and curled up into a ball, her knees moving towards her chest. "I am."

"Don't lie to me. I know you're not." Maura's tone was soft but she was determined. She gently shifted closer to press her lips against her wife's for a sweet kiss. "You can rest, honey," she whispered. "We're safe now."

Jane just nodded her head, unable to speak. She was unable to respond to the amount of love that showed in Maura's hazel eyes, her touches that spoke of so much care and adoration, her love that warmed her heart. Tears spilled on the pillow beneath her head before she could stop them. "I'm afraid."

Maura's lips curled up into a slight, sad smile. "I know."

"I'm afraid to sleep, Maur," Jane whispered, her voice hoarse and laced with defeat.

"I'm here, Jane." Maura moved even closer and rested her forehead against her wife's, gently lifting her chin to look into dark eyes. "You know I'm here. I'm here to make you go to sleep and to wake you from your nightmares. I'm here to hold you afterwards and to let you go when you've calmed down and need time on your own. I'm here, my love."

Jane nodded and felt hot tears trickling down her cheeks, feeling them rapidly increasing and turning into a flood of tears she had been holding back for too long. "I know," she struggled to get out, her breath getting caught in her throat as she curled up into an even tighter ball.

"Let me hold you, Jane," Maura whispered softly as her voice laced with tears. "Please."

Jane allowed herself to straighten her body and immediately felt soft yet strong arms wrapping around her, pulling her as close as humanly possible as she cried. She couldn't stop her tears and a part of her didn't want to. Maura's arms were squeezing her pain away and healing her heart, piece by piece. That's what Maura did. She was her other half and made her complete again.

After hours of silent cries and a seemingly endless flood of tears from both women, Jane finally drifted off to sleep. She couldn't help it. And yes, she woke up from one of the worst nightmares she'd ever had but Maura was there. She was there to catch her and she held her until her tears dried, her breathing got back to normal and her body stopped shivering. She let her go when Jane started feeling anxious and restless, allowing her to pace through the living room and punch her boxing dummy for as long as she needed until she went back to bed in the early hours of the morning.

The next time she woke up, sunlight was shining through the curtains. Jane looked at the alarm clock and saw that it was past 11AM. She heard the sound of the girl's chatter coming from downstairs, Lily's cheers and laughter sounding like music to her ears. Maura's calm voice talked over it and Jane heard Anna responding to a question Maura asked her. Jane sighed and turned her head, only then feeling the headache that was pounding behind her eyes. She looked at the window and flinched from the harsh light that hurt her eyes. She felt like hell.

She groaned softly and got out of bed, shivering when she lost the warmth of the blankets. She put on a warm sweater and a pair of sweatpants over her shorts before she walked downstairs, noticing how weak she was standing on her legs. Her body was giving out on her.

"Good morning, love." Maura smiled at her wife but her smile fell when she saw her pale face and red cheeks. "Jane, are you alright?" She stepped forward and reached up to press her lips against Jane's forehead. "God, you're burning hot."

Jane just hummed, closing her eyes at the feeling of her wife's cool lips on her warm skin. "Mornin'."

"You have a fever, Jane," Maura said softly as she brushed her hair away from her sweaty forehead. "You should go back to bed. I'll make you breakfast and get you some medicine."

"I'll take the couch." Jane smiled sadly and felt her wife kissing her hot cheek before she headed towards the living room and lay down on the couch, watching how Lily and Anna attempted to build a castle out of wooden blocks together.

Lily noticed her mother and happily jumped up but when she saw the state Jane was in, she furrowed her brow and stood still. "Mama? You sick?"

"Yeah, baby." Jane smiled and reached out her arm for the little girl. "Mama's not feeling so good today."

Lily pouted and slowly walked towards her mother. "Kiss?"

Jane chuckled and nodded her head. "Yeah."

Lily smiled and climbed up on the couch, using the little space that was left to lie down next to her mother and sweetly kiss her cheek.

"Thanks, honey. I feel better already."

Lily grinned proudly and carefully curled up on top of her mother, her messy curls tickling Jane's chin as she snuggled in close. "Hugsies helps too, Mama."

Jane laughed softly but the movement hurt her head immediately. "Yeah they do."

After a few more blissful moments, Lily got restless and squirmed off her mother to get back to her castle. Jane watched her leaving and noticed the concern in Anna's eyes as she looked at her mother on the couch. "I'm okay, peanut," she said softly. "Probably just a cold."

"I'd say you caught a rather bad flu, Jane," Maura said as she handed her a glass of water and a few pills. "Your fever is too high to be considered just a cold."

"Flu?" Anna furrowed her brow and left her sister to walk towards her mothers.

"I'm gonna be okay, baby." Jane smiled reassuringly at her daughter. "It's just the flu, that's all. I'll be better soon."

Anna sighed in relief. "Good. Mommy can make you better, right Mommy? 'Cause you're a doctor?"

Maura smiled and brushed her hand through Anna's blond hair. "I'm going to do the best I can, sweetheart."

"Is the medicine gonna help Mama?"

"Yes." Maura lifted Anna up in her arms and kissed the side of her head. "They will make the fever go away."

Anna nodded her head. "Good."

"Would you like to help me make Mama some breakfast? I was thinking about scrambled eggs."

"Can I scramble them?"

"Yes."

"Okay." She looked over Maura's shoulder as she carried her towards the kitchen. She looked at Jane and smiled. "We're gonna make you breakfast to get better, Mama."

Jane nodded, her lips curling into a smile as she felt her eyes closing in exhaustion, her muscles sore from the flu. She didn't miss the sparkle that just showed in Anna's eyes. That sparkle that made the girl more and more beautiful and her smile so intoxicating. That sparkle she was afraid she'd lost when Anna was in danger. But it was back. Anna was getting back. There was a long road ahead, Jane knew. They weren't there yet. There were a lot of nightmares, fears, anxieties and ghosts to beat. But as long as Anna's eyes kept sparkling, as long as Lily kept squirming and cheering everybody around her up, as long as Maura loved her and as long as the family was together, everything would be just fine.


	26. Chapter 26

_A/N This chapter feels a little chaotic but I wanted to get more into Rachel and Morgan for a bit. I hope you guys like it anyway. Thank you all so much for your kind reviews! It really keeps me going. I have a few chapters written already so I hope you'll stick with me until the end. Let me know what you think!_

Chapter 26

A familiar feeling of bliss overwhelmed Maura as she sat on the couch with her little family, Lily in her lap, Anna and Morgan at her left side and Jane snuggled into her right side while a Disney movie played on the TV. Jane's fever just didn't drop and had been exhausting her for almost three days now. Maura worried about her wife. She felt defeated and broken under stress. The fierce detective Rizzoli seemed beaten down by a common flu, and yet Maura knew there was more that was bothering her. Someone deliberately tried to hurt Anna and that was harder than either of them ever expected. Jane saw it as failure. Maura saw it as her ultimate fear that was realized.

But for now, things seemed close to perfect. Lily sucked on her pacifier as she sat snuggled against her mother's front, Anna sat against her side, her head resting against her upper arm while Morgan was lying with her head on the armrest and her legs tucked under herself. Jane's feverish head was resting in the crook of Maura's neck, warmth radiating from her skin, sweat making her curls stick to her face.

Maura sighed and rested her cheek against her wife's warm forehead. "Did you take your medicine, my love?" she whispered.

Jane nodded weakly. "Yeah."

"Your fever isn't dropping."

"I just took it a half hour ago or something," Jane replied softly. "It'll kick in soon, right?"

Maura pressed her lips against the brunette's forehead and sighed deeply. "Yes."

Lily stirred in Maura's lap and turned her head to look up at her mother. "Mommy?"

"Hm?" She brushed the girl's dark curls back, smiling as she looked into her familiar brown eyes.

"One more candies?"

"No, sweetheart. You've had enough candy for tonight."

Lily pouted and put on her biggest doe-eyes to try and convince her mother. "Please?"

"No." Maura chuckled.

"Pretty please?"

"No is no, baby. No more whining."

Lily sighed in disappointment and turned back towards the television, focusing back on the movie. When the movie ended, Morgan and Anna whispered something secretive and got out paper and pencils to draw, and Lily scurried off towards her box of toys.

Maura wrapped her arms around her wife and guided her down against her chest, kissing her temple. "If there is no improvement by tomorrow, we'll go see a doctor. Okay?"

"You're a doctor. I'm seeing you."

"You know what I mean." Maura shook her head with a slight chuckle as she brushed her wife's messy curls back. "I don't like to see you like this."

Jane hummed and closed her eyes. "Believe me, I hate it as much as you do."

"I know you do." She pulled her detective close, feeling her feverish body against her, thinking about how strong and fast that body usually was. How she once tackled a criminal with a dislocated shoulder, how she kept going after she was shot, how she was faster than all the male detectives in her unit and stronger than any woman Maura had ever met. Yet, this flu got her down. The stress and the fear made it worse.

"At least you kept the chicken soup down," Maura said softly. "That's a good start."

"I'll be back on my feet by the end of the night." Jane smirked her famous Rizzoli-smirk and Maura was happy to see it hadn't changed.

"You'll be back in bed by the end of the night, Rizzoli." Maura chuckled and kissed her temple. "Why don't you try to get some sleep before dinner?" she whispered, gently combing her fingers through tangled curls.

Jane nodded weakly and closed her eyes at her wife's gentle touches. "Hm."

"Bed or couch?"

Jane groaned softly and reluctantly moved herself off her wife. "Bed."

Maura nodded, leaning forward to press her lips against her lover's warm forehead. "I love you," she whispered. "My fierce detective."

"I love you too." Jane smiled weakly and stood up from the couch, her legs straining to keep her up.

"Be careful." Maura grabbed Jane's arm when she saw how weak she was standing. She wrapped her arm around her wife's waist and took her arm in hers to lead her towards the stairs until she felt that Jane's dizziness subsiding and her legs finding their strength to walk upstairs. She felt tears in her eyes at the sight. "Jane…"

Jane turned her head and furrowed her brow when she saw the sadness in her wife's eyes.

Maura sighed and wrapped her arms around the brunette's neck, pulling her in for a loving hug. "Sleep well, my love."

Jane smiled, kissed her wife's forehead and walked upstairs to get some needed rest. An afternoon with the children was a lot to take for the sick woman.

As soon as Maura was back in the kitchen where Anna and Morgan were coloring, the doorbell rang and Maura opened it to see Rachel standing outside, wearing an old but pretty blue dress and a thin sweater. "Hi, Rachel." Maura smiled at her and opened the door as she walked back inside.

"Hi Rach!" Morgan yelled from the kitchen, waving at her sister for a split second before turning back to what she was working on.

"I bought those cookies you like so much," Maura said with a smile as she headed towards the kitchen, "would you like some?"

Rachel didn't reply and that surprised Maura. The Rizzoli-Isles household was like her second home. Usually she just went to get her drinks and cookies herself. But now she was standing in the entrance of the living room, staring down at her shoes and fumbling with her dress. Something was clearly wrong.

"Rachel?"

The girl pulled up her shoulders and took a deep, shaky breath. "I-… I just came by to say sorry."

Maura furrowed her brow. "Why?"

Rachel shrugged. "Just because."

"Okay, come sit down." Maura moved towards the couch and patted the spot next to her, inviting Rachel to sit. "Why do you feel the need to apologize?"

"Because… Because if it weren't for us, this would have never happened to you! Or Anna!"

"Rachel…"

"It's true!"

Maura placed her hand on Rachel's upper arm. "Don't blame yourself for this, Rachel."

"If it weren't for us, my mother would never get to you." Rachel's voice was shaking and tears shimmered in her eyes. "It's our fault."

Maura shook her head and gently brushed Rachel's dark hair behind her ear. "It's not your fault. You are not responsible for your mother's actions. She, and only she is responsible for what she did."

Rachel looked into Maura's eyes as a few tears made their way down her pale cheeks. "I never knew she would do something so horrible."

"In her opinion, we took away her family. It brought out the worst in her."

"You _saved_ her family," Rachel whispered softly. "We can't ever thank you and Jane enough for what you did."

Maura smiled lovingly and scooted closer towards the teenager to wrap her arms around the girl, pulling her in for a sweet hug. "You are always welcome here, honey. None of the events that happened are you fault in any way." She pulled back to look into her bright blue eyes. "It's not your fault, Rachel. Okay?"

Rachel nodded. "Okay."

"Good." Maura smiled and brushed the girl's long hair over her shoulder. "You can come by whenever you want, honey."

"I don't want to put you in danger." She rested her head on Maura's shoulder and wiped her tears with the back of her wrist.

"Your mother is in prison and a lot of people are making sure she can't hurt anybody ever again." Maura pulled back and smiled at Rachel. "You're safe. We're all safe."

Rachel nodded as fresh tears spilled on her cheeks. "I'm sorry, Maura," she whispered hoarsely. "I'm so sorry."

Maura shook her head and wiped Rachel's tears with both her hands. "Don't be, honey. It's not your fault."

Rachel smiled, but the sadness didn't disappear from her eyes.

"Rachel." Maura gently cupped Rachel's chin to make her look into her eyes. "You're always welcome here. Always."

"Always?" Rachel smirked slightly through her tears. "Even at three AM?"

Maura chuckled. "Yes, even at three AM. Although Jane will probably open the door pointing a gun at you but you're still welcome."

Rachel laughed and averted her gaze towards her lap before allowing Maura to pull her back in her arms. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." Maura relaxed against the back of the couch, bringing Rachel with her in her arms. She couldn't even imagine how difficult life must be for the young girl. Suddenly she had no mother, she had to move to a different house, possibly a different school… Her whole world was turned upside down. And it was the same for Morgan. She was so little but she had to grow up faster than she wanted to. Maura was more than happy to offer a home to these girls. She was more than happy to offer them a warm embrace, a place where people listened to them, truly listened, a place with family. She knew how much Rachel and Morgan loved their father. She noticed it in the way they talked about him and in the way he treated them, Maura knew those girls were the most important thing in his life. But they missed a mother. Maura and Jane provided a substitute, and Maura liked to thing that they were doing a good job at it.

"How was school today?" Maura asked, her hand gently brushing up and down Rachel's back.

"Good but I got a lot of homework."

Maura hummed. "Have you started yet?"

"Dad's gonna help me tonight."

"Maura!" Morgan's voice called out to her and Maura turned her head to see both girls hurrying towards them on the couch.

"Hey, honeys." Maura smiled at them and pointed at the pictures they drew. "What did you make?"

"We made drawings for Jane!" Morgan grinned proudly.

"To make Mama feel better." Anna smiled sweetly and showed her drawing to her mother, a picture of what was probably their little family, a dog, a rabbit, a cow and many dolls.

"Oh that's very sweet of you, girls." Maura smiled, slowly untangling herself from Rachel to take a look at Morgan's picture as well. "You are both so talented!"

Morgan blushed and smiled at her drawing. "Can we give it to her?"

"Jane is sleeping now, honey. I'll make sure she gets it as soon as she wakes up, okay?"

"Okay." Morgan nodded and took off back towards the kitchen, Anna following closely.

"Maura?" Rachel asked quietly, her voice soft and vulnerable.

"Hm?"

"Do you think my dad's gonna be okay?"

"Yes, honey." Maura brushed Rachel's hair back and tightened her arm around the girl's shoulders. "As long as he keeps talking to that doctor you told us about, he's going to be okay."

Rachel nodded slowly. "I-… I don't remember how he was before… Before it all started." She took a deep breath. "I only know him being scared and quiet."

Maura looked at the teenager at her side and felt a sting of hurt in her stomach. "You get the opportunity to get to know him all over again," she said softly. "And so does he."

"Is that a good thing?" Rachel lifted her head and looked at the blonde.

Maura smiled. She tucked a strand of dark hair behind Rachel's ear and nodded her head. "Yes, honey. That's a good thing."

Rachel showed a small smile and relaxed against the back of the couch. "Maura?" 

"Yes?"

"Can I have something to drink?"

Maura chuckled and squeezed the girl's arm before letting her go. "Since when do you ask that? Of course, you know where to find it."

"Yep. Thank you." Rachel stood up and walked towards the kitchen to pour herself something to drink.

Maura was happy she felt at home like this. She deserved a loving home without troubles. Just as Maura stood up to get Lily something to drink, the doorbell rang and she opened the door to see Rachel and Morgan's father.

"Hi." He smiled politely, his blue eyes sparkling under large, grey eyebrows. He was a kind man. He was tall and muscular and it was still a mystery to Maura how his ex-wife managed to abuse him for so long. He could have easily taken her out, physically. The psychological abuse had to be bigger than any of them knew.

"Daddy!" Morgan jumped off her chair and ran into her father, reaching out her arms to the large man, allowing him to pick her up. He smiled lovingly as soon as he saw his daughter and lifted the girl in his strong arms.

"Hi, kiddo."

"Why'd you come so early? Are you done with work?" Morgan wrapped her arm around his neck, looking expectantly at her father.

"Yeah, the boss gave me a short day."

"Yay!" Morgan bounced and hugged him tight, eliciting a smile from her father.

"It's nice to see you again, Craig," Maura said with a smile. "How are you?"

He shrugged. "Managing. We'll be fine."

"Are you done for the rest of the day, Dad?" Rachel asked as she put down her glass and wrapped her arm around him to give him a hug from the side.

"Yeah, baby." He kissed her temple. "But the boss got me hooked for this weekend in exchange."

Rachel's brow furrowed and she pouted her lips. "Really? Saturday _and_ Sunday?"

"Yes, I'm sorry."

"It's okay." Rachel shrugged and leaned closer into his side, finding comfort in the safety of her father's strong arms.

"I uhm…" He turned his attention towards Maura, "I wanted to thank you for what you're doing for my girls."

"We're happy to do anything we can." Maura smiled, looking at Morgan who was sitting comfortably on her father's hip, her head resting into the crook of his neck. "They're doing amazingly well, both of them."

"Partly because of you and your family."

Maura shook her head. "Partly. Mostly because of their father."

"Thank you." Craig pulled Rachel close into his side for a short moment before letting her go and patting her arm. "You wanna get your stuff? We gotta go get some groceries for dinner tonight."

"What are we having, Daddy?" Morgan asked as she lifted her head and Rachel moved to gather their stuff.

Craig sighed. "I don't know, kiddo."

"Grilled cheese _again_?" Morgan pouted and sighed deeply.

Craig smiled nervously at Maura before turning his attention back to his daughter. "Well, I got a nice tip today so I think we can afford some nice vegetables and maybe even some dessert. How about that, huh?"

Morgan smiled contently. "Yeah. But no broccoli."

"Alright." He chuckled and hugged his daughter before putting her on the floor and taking the girl's bag from Rachel. "You ready?"

Rachel nodded. She turned her head to look at Maura and smiled. "Thanks, Maura."

"No need to thank me." Maura shook her head and felt Anna resting against her side, looking at her friend who was leaving.

"Bye, Anna." Morgan waved at her and reached up to open the front door.

"Bye!"

The family said their goodbyes and Maura brushed her hand through Anna's hair, placing a kiss on top of her head before lifting Lily off the floor and carrying the little girl in her arms. "Time for fruit, honey."

"Mango?" Lily looked at her mother with pleading brown eyes.

Maura nodded her head, pulling her youngest daughter against her for a loving hug. She felt unfair. She looked at the kitchen counter and saw two mangos, apples, bananas, green beans ready to be cooked for that night… She knew that the fridge was filled with food as well. Craig couldn't afford to buy his family fruit. He couldn't give his daughter a healthy meal every night of the week. He served them grilled cheese sandwiches and mac and cheese because that's all he had money for.

She wished she could help them. She wanted so badly to give them a part of the money she owned, but she knew she couldn't. Craig was able to support his family. It wasn't much, but the girls were healthy. They loved their father and he loved them. That's all that mattered.


	27. Chapter 27

Chapter 27

Maura walked back upstairs for the second time to try and wake her oldest daughter. She was particularly difficult to get out of bed today, while the girl normally woke up before her alarm clock. "Anna, honey," Maura entered the bedroom and walked towards the pile of blankets that hid her daughter. "It's time to get up, we don't want to be late for school."

Her brow furrowed when she heard soft sniffling coming from underneath the blankets. "Anna?"

The pile of blankets moved slightly and Maura saw a few strands of blond hair peaking out on the pillow. She walked around the bed and sat down on the edge of it, gently moving the blankets to look at her daughter. Tears were streaming down Anna's face and her small fists were balled up tightly in front of her chest.

"Oh, sweetheart…" Maura wiped Anna's wet cheek with the back of her hand, wondering how long she had been crying like this. "What's the matter?"

"I d-don't wanna go to s-school," Anna replied quietly, her breath hitching in her throat as she struggled to get the words out.

Maura sighed deeply, her brow furrowing in concern. She was afraid this would happen. The events of the past week could have been traumatic for the little girl. "Why not, baby?"

"I'm s-scared." Anna squeezed her eyes shut as a loud sob escaped her small body that curled up into a ball under the blankets.

Maura nodded. She understood, it wasn't surprising. "I know, honey." She gently moved the blankets away, revealing her daughter's shaking body. "Come here," she whispered, carefully pulling Anna up and into her arms.

Anna climbed into her mother's lap and clutched her hands to her blouse as she sobbed quietly. "H-he's gone, right?"

"Yes, honey. He's gone." Maura closed her eyes and rested her chin on top of Anna's head. She had been asking that same question over and over again. 'He's gone, right?', one single question that expressed her deep, uncontrollable fear. They needed to remind Anna over and over again that he was indeed gone. That he couldn't hurt her anymore. That he couldn't even come close to her or look at her anymore. "He's in prison, remember? He can't get out and he can never, ever come close to you again. It's safe in school."

Anna nodded, sniffling her tears away but failing as they kept streaming down her cheeks. "Is the fence fixed?"

"Yes, it is. Mr. Peters promised it would be fixed, so no one can get in." She kissed the top of Anna's head and pulled her as close as possible. "You're safe, sweetheart."

"Then why am I scared?" Anna lifted her head and looked up at her mother, her big grey eyes shimmering with thick tears that broke Maura's heart.

"Because you've been through something very bad," Maura replied quietly. "It's perfectly normal to be afraid."

"It is?"

Maura nodded. "Yes, honey. You just have to remember not to let the fear win." She smiled slightly and tucked a strand of hair behind Anna's ear.

"How?"

"By going to school today." Maura looked into Anna's eyes and gently caressed her pale cheek. "That's how we show the fear that there's nothing to be afraid of anymore. Only memories."

"But memories don't hurt," Anna said softly, listening intently to what her mother had to say.

Maura shook her head. Not physically. But she knew how excruciating the pain of memories could be. She felt it every time she remembered how Jane got shot, how Jane got kidnapped, how Hoyt almost got to the both of them, how she had lost contact with her parents… They all hurt. "Memories don't make you any less safe," Maura said instead, her voice suddenly unsteady. "Hey," she cupped Anna's cheek and looked into her tear-filled eyes. "Your Mama is detective Jane Rizzoli. Remember how mad she was when she found out someone hurt you?"

" _Real_ mad…"

"So mad. No one will ever dare to come close to hurting you again or Mama will be even angrier."

"Mama's scary when she's real mad." Anna chuckled through her tears. "But she's still sick…"

"Well yes. But she's getting better and the bad man is in prison."

Anna nodded against her mother's chest. "I'm still scared, Mommy."

"I know, sweetheart. And that's okay." Maura combed her fingers through Anna's messy bed hair. "It's okay to be scared." She pulled her daughter close and kissed her forehead. "Why don't we take it step by step?" she whispered. "Just small steps."

"What steps?"

"Well the first step is to take off your pajamas and get dressed. Can you do that?"

"I don't wanna go to school Mommy!" Anna started crying again, her bottom lip quivering as fresh tears sprung to her eyes.

"Who said anything about school? I just said getting dressed, that's all. We'll see where we go from there. Okay?"

Anna sniffled and allowed her mother to wipe her tears. "Okay."

"Good, my brave girl." She pulled her daughter close before letting her go and pulling her pajama shirt over her head. "Now, what do you want to wear today?"

"Can I wear the pink dress?"

Maura pursed her lips and opened Anna's closet. "Yes, but with a jacket or something, otherwise it's too cold."

"The white one?"

"Good choice." Maura smiled at her little girl and handed her the clothes, watching as Anna quickly got dressed. When she finished, Maura pulled her long blond hair out of the back of the dress and kissed the top of her head. "Next step, breakfast."

They got through all the steps. Breakfast. Packing lunch. Waking Lily. Brushing teeth. Giving Mama kisses. And then it was time for the last step. Go to school.

Anna took a deep, shuttering breath and tried to make herself as brave as possible but Maura saw the nerves racing through the girl's tiny body. The sight brought tears to the doctor's eyes. Her little girl was so afraid and anxious. Going to school had never seemed like a bigger challenge. And, as it turned out, letting her daughter go had never seemed like a bigger challenge either.

Maura left Lily with Jane and walked with Anna into the school towards her classroom, noticing the girl's pace slowing down the closer they got to their destination. Maura stopped a few feet before they reached the door and kneeled down in front of her daughter to cup her face and look into her eyes. "I'm proud of you, honey," she said softly. "You're going to do great today."

Anna nodded, her eyes filled with fear as she wrapped her arms around Maura's neck.

Maura pulled her little girl close and kissed the side of her head. "I love you, sweetheart."

"Love you too, Mommy," Anna replied quietly, her short arms squeezing around her neck. She pulled back and nervously fumbled with her dress.

"You look beautiful." Maura smiled and adjusted the girl's French braid over her shoulder.

"Anna!" Suddenly Morgan appeared in the hallway, running towards her best friend. "Wow, pretty dress!"

Anna blushed and Maura stood back up to stroke Morgan's hair. "Hi, honey. Did you have a good weekend?"

Morgan nodded and wrapped her arms around Maura for a sideways hug. "Yeah."

"Where's your dad?" Maura wrapped her arm around the girl's shoulders and pulled her close for a moment.

"He's gotta work."

"Hey," Maura gently lifted Morgan's chin and looked into her eyes, "can you do me a favor today?" 

Morgan nodded, always eager to help out.

"Can you look out for Anna today?" Maura smiled, looking at Anna who was nervously fumbling with her braid. "She's a bit uneasy and I bet she feels a lot better with you by her side."

Morgan pushed out her chest and proudly lifted her chin, nodding her head. "Yeah."

"Okay." Maura caressed Morgan's cheek and brushed her hair behind her ear. Her father didn't know how to do his daughter's hair so Morgan's brown hair was always just hanging loose around her shoulders. She turned to pull Anna in for a last hug, noticing her own reluctance to let her daughter go. She hadn't expected it to be this difficult. She knew Anna was safe and nothing could happen, but the fact that her little girl was feeling so anxious made her feel terrible. She knew it was for the best to send Anna to school today, but it was harder than she thought it would be.

"C'mon Anna, let's go," Morgan took her friend's arm as they broke the embrace.

Maura smiled at the sight. Morgan took her responsibility very seriously. "I love you, baby. Have fun today."

"Love you too, Mommy." Anna stood up on her toes and allowed her mother to peck her lips before turning around and following Morgan into the classroom.

Maura put her hand over her heart as she watched through the window, seeing Morgan and Anna walking to their seat while chatting about something that made Anna giggle. Tears burned in Maura's eyes as she tore herself away to head back home to her sick wife and youngest daughter.

Back home, Jane was sitting up in bed with Lily in her lap as they watched a cartoon on television. Jane was getting better. She still had a feverish blush on her cheeks but she kept her food down and she was less tired. "Hi, my loves." Maura smiled and kissed her wife's lips and Lily's temple. "You're lucky, little girl! Watching TV with Mama in your pajamas?"

Lily grinned. "Yeah."

Maura chuckled and shook her head while she tangled one of her hands in Jane's curls, gently turning her wife's head to look into her eyes, studying her intently. "You're feeling better," she said softly.

Jane nodded, her lips curling up into a slight smile. "Yeah. How's Anna?"

Maura sighed deeply and shifted closer against Jane's side. "Scared. Anxious."

"I noticed. Did she go to school okay?"

Maura shook her head and felt tears in her eyes again. "Not really. But yes, I think she'll be okay."

"Are you?" Jane furrowed her brow and looked into the blonde's hazel eyes. "Are you okay?"

"No." A single tear trickled down Maura's cheek as she slowly shook her head. "I never expected it could be so heartbreaking to simply drop her off at school."

"Maura…" Jane untangled her arm from around Lily's stomach and stroked Maura's cheek. "She's okay."

Maura nodded slowly. "I know. I just… God, she was just so anxious."

"She'll feel better once the day starts."

"I know. And Morgan promised to look after her today."

Jane chuckled. "I'd like to see that." She smirked and rested back against the headboard, slowly brushing her fingers through Lily's hair in front of her as the girl's attention was focused on the television.

"I think it made her feel a little more at ease."

"Hm." Jane turned her head and moved closer to press her lips against her wife's for a deep, loving kiss.

Maura hummed in surprise and cupped Jane's cheek as she felt her wife's tongue trace her bottom lip, silently asking for entrance which she happily granted. She had missed her wife. Not only had Jane been sick with the flu for the past few days, but the stressful case of Janet Matthews and the attack on Anna took its toll on the detective. The passion Maura felt in the kiss put her at ease. Jane was coming back.

She reluctantly broke apart, aware of the three-year-old that was still sitting in between Jane's legs. She rested her forehead against the brunette's and cupped her cheeks, smiling lovingly. "I love you, Jane," she whispered quietly. "I love you so much."

"I love you too." Jane smirked and pecked her wife's lips a few more times before breaking apart. "Can we… Can we go take a walk or something? I feel like I'm going crazy in here."

Maura nodded. "Of course. Fresh air will be good for you." She brushed her wife's hair back. "Have you had breakfast yet?"

"No."

"How about we go out for something to eat?" Maura asked quietly, her voice soft and loving.

"Great plan." Jane hooked her arms under Lily's and tried to lift her up into the air, but her muscles didn't have enough strength after being out for a while. She groaned softly and Lily turned her head in confusion.

"We're going out for breakfast, baby," Maura said while she gently pulled Lily off Jane's lap, pressing her lips against the girl's forehead.

"For pancakes?" Lily's eyes went wide in anticipation. "Please?"

"We'll see." Maura chuckled and lifted her youngest daughter in her arms before putting her on the floor and patting her bottom. "Let's go get dressed first."

"Pancakes!" Lily ran off towards her bedroom, her dark curls bouncing around her head.

Maura laughed. When there was a possibility of pancakes, Lily wouldn't let go.

The small family had a lovely breakfast in a small restaurant a few blocks away, and that was all Jane's healing body could take for that morning. She was completely exhausted by the time they got back the house and she immediately went to bed, falling asleep almost instantly. Not wanting to wake her, Maura took Lily with her when it was time to pick Anna up from school. She had been nervous to pick her oldest daughter up, curious about how she did that day.

They waited for Anna in front of her school, standing next to the car while Lily contently walked around Maura's legs, chatting about nothing in particular. Maura smiled at her youngest daughter, loving how her dark curls framed her beautiful face and those sweet rosy cheeks. Lily looked up at her mother and grinned. "Anna's back?"

"She'll be right with us, honey."

"In how long?" Lily asked, walking in a circle around her mother's legs.

"Just a few more minutes." Maura kneeled down against the car and put her hands on Lily's waist to make her stop walking in circles. "You're making Mommy dizzy!"

Lily giggled and leaned back into her mother's front, her small hands resting on Maura's big ones. She traced her mother's wedding ring with her small fingers. "Mommy, 's pretty."

"It is, isn't it?" Maura smiled and rested her cheek against the side of the girl's head.

"You's the prettiest Mommy." Lily leaned back against her mother as Maura tightened her arms around her little girl.

"Thank you, sweetheart." Maura chuckled but her smile fell when she saw a familiar blond girl appearing in front of the school. She quickly rose to her feet and waited nervously for Anna to get closer, examining the girl's expression. She looked tired. Her shoulders were dropped and her feet were dragging. But she was smiling. She smiled at Morgan who ran towards her father's car, her backpack bouncing on her back. When Anna saw her mother and sister, she jumped and sped off towards them.

Maura smiled brightly and opened her arms for her oldest daughter, immediately pulling her into a squeezing hug. "Hi, baby."

"I played on the playground and I wasn't scared, Mommy," Anna pulled back and looked up at her mother with a proud sparkle in her grey eyes. "Only at first but only a little bit."

Tears filled Maura's eyes as she brushed a strand of loose hair out of her daughter's face, her heart swelling with love and pride. "I'm so proud of you, honey," she whispered. "So, so very proud."

Anna smiled at her mother and leaned in for another hug. "Is Mama better?"

"Almost," Maura replied while she pulled back and opened the car door for her daughter. "She's feeling a lot better."

"We did breakfast," Lily told her sister as she climbed into her car seat. "Pancakes!"

Anna smiled, buckling her own seatbelt as she restrained herself from being jealous at her sister for having a fun day with her mothers. But Maura saw the pride of that day in her oldest daughter when she looked in the rearview mirror at the backseat. She saw the feeling of winning from the fear. She saw the victory and she saw the relief. She was safe.


	28. Chapter 28

Chapter 28

"Jane! Jane!" Rachel ran towards the brunette in the kitchen after entering the house through the back door, totally panicked and out of breath. "Where's Maura?"

"At work." Jane furrowed her brow when she noticed the fear in the young girl's eyes. "What's wrong? You didn't bring Morgan with you?"

Rachel shook her head. "No, no… I-… I need Maura…"

"What's going on, Rachel?"

Tears welled up in the teenager's eyes as she frantically shook her head. "I- I…"

"Talk to me."

"I need a doctor."

"A doctor?" Jane patted the stool at the counter, silently asking Rachel to sit down. "Are you sick?"

Rachel shrugged as a few tears made their way down her cheeks. "I don't know," she whispered. "Maybe."

"What's wrong?"

"It's embarrassing."

"Hey," Jane smiled and sat down next to her, gently squeezing the girl's leg. "I might not be a doctor but I'm a great listener."

Rachel just shook her head.

"You're worrying me, Rach. C'mon. Tell me."

She took a deep breath and her cheeks turned red with an embarrassed blush. "There's blood."

"Blood?" Jane furrowed her brow and felt a hint of concern burning in the pit of her stomach. "Where?"

"In… In my panties."

A sigh of relief escaped Jane's lips as her shoulders dropped and her muscles relaxed. "Oh baby…"

"What? Blood, Jane!"

"Yeah," Jane nodded and gently wiped a tear that trickled down the girl's cheek. "Has no one ever taught you about menstruating? Periods?"

Rachel's brow furrowed and she shook her head. "No…"

Jane smiled sweetly at her, squeezing her knee as she felt a strong sense of sadness for the teenager in front of her. She had no one that ever informed her about anything like this. Her mother failed that job and there was no one else to take over. "Okay," Jane said softly, getting comfortable in her seat, "I'm gonna teach you about growing up. It sucks."

Rachel chuckled sadly through her tears. "It does?"

"Yeah, people say crap like 'you're finally a woman' but the truth is, your body is getting ready to have babies."

"Babies?" Rachel wrinkled her nose. "Ew."

Jane laughed. "I know, right? What I'm about to tell you is even more 'ew'."

"Do I want to know?" 

Jane sighed and nodded her head. "Yeah. You're perfectly normal and there is nothing wrong with your body." She smiled and recollected all the knowledge she had about menstruation and sex. It turned out Rachel knew next to nothing. Too little for a twelve-year-old. She had cramps yesterday and got her period today and she panicked. Not so strange, given the fact that no one ever explained to her that this could happen.

After a few minutes of explaining, Rachel was comfortable enough to ask questions and asked every single one that came up in her mind. She wrinkled her nose at the gross part and smiled at the thought of becoming a woman.

"So that's it," Jane said softly as she finished her story. "Those cramps are totally normal, unfortunately."

Rachel nodded. "I uhm… You said there are pads for this?"

"Yeah. You can use tampons, too."

"Ew." She wrinkled her nose and shook her head. "I don't want to put those things inside me."

Jane chuckled. "We have some pads for you if you need them. Let me get them for you, alright?"

Rachel nodded her head and smiled gratefully. Jane stood up, placed a kiss on her forehead and walked upstairs, hearing Lily scurrying around in her bed after her nap.

"Hi, baby." Jane opened the door and smiled at her youngest daughter, seeing her unruly curls trying to get out of her ponytail as she sat on the bed in her pajama pants and T-shirt.

"Mama." Lily grinned and reached up her arms towards her mother.

Jane lifted the little girl in her arms and hugged her tightly. "Did you have a good nap?"

Lily nodded and snuggled into the crook of her mother's neck. "'s Mommy home?"

"No, baby. Mommy's still at work." She walked out of the bedroom and headed for the bathroom to get a pack of pads for Rachel and lay out a pair of her own panties so she could change into clean ones. "She's gonna try to be home for bedtime."

"For story?"

"Yeah, for a bedtime story." She kissed her daughter's dark curls so similar to her own, feeling her short arms wrapping around her neck.

Back downstairs, she handed the pads to Rachel and tuck a strand of hair behind her hear. "I put clean underwear in the bathroom upstairs if you need it. It's probably too big, but it's something."

"Thank you." Rachel smiled shyly and stood up from her seat. "I'm sorry to bother you with it like this."

Jane shook her head and waved her words away. "Don't be. You can come to us anytime."

Rachel smiled a grateful smile before heading towards the bathroom to get cleaned up.

"Rachel sad?" Lily asked her mother, looking at her with wide eyes.

"She's gonna be okay," Jane brushed her daughter's hair out of her face as she kissed her forehead.

Lily wrapped her short arm around her mother's neck, gave her a squeezing hug and a kiss on her cheek before squirming out of her arms and hopping on the floor to find something to play with. She was a happy little girl, content to play with whatever was lying around. She could be stubborn and difficult, but she was mostly just playing peacefully, much to her mothers' delight.

When Rachel came back from the bathroom, she stopped in the living room and smiled shyly. "Thank you. I uhm… I hope you don't mind I put mine in the laundry."

Jane shook her head. "Good, you'll get them back when we washed them."

"Thanks."

"You want something to drink?"

"No, thank you. I should get home, my Dad's gonna be back soon." She smiled at the knowledge of spending the rest of the afternoon and evening with her father and sister. She grabbed her bag, swung it over her shoulder and walked towards the back door. "Thank you again."

"No problem." Jane rubbed Rachel's back before she went outside. "Be careful on the bus."

"You always say that." Rachel chuckled and shook her head. "The bus is totally safe."

"I know but I still want you to be careful."

"You want me to be careful always! Even when I go to bed!"

Jane laughed and playfully slapped Rachel's arm. "Go home, honey."

"Yeah." Rachel giggled and waved at the brunette before running into the backyard to head home.

Jane smiled at the sight of the cheerful teenager. She was just a girl. Her straight brown hair was dancing on her back as her dress twirled around her short skinny legs. She was a pretty girl and Jane knew she would even prettier when she grew up. It was a new kind of affection she felt for her. She cared about her and both Rachel and Morgan felt like their daughters even though Jane knew they were happy with their father. She was more than happy to be a substitute mother for them.

Suddenly a loud cry pulled Jane's from her thoughts. She hurried towards the living room and saw Lily splayed out on her stomach, crying loudly. She quickly picked her up and inspected her for injuries, but she saw none. "What happened, baby?"

"F-fall!" Lily cried and clung to her mother, more upset about the shock of it than actual pain.

"Yeah, I figured that." Jane smiled and hugged her little girl to her front. "Where does it hurt?"

Lily pointed at her knee and Jane sat down on the couch, taking Lily in her lap to lift her skirt and look at her knee, seeing a slight red scrape on the top of it. "Good thing Mommy made you wear a skirt today, huh?" she said with a tickle to her daughter's tummy.

Lily giggled softly through her tears. She didn't like skirts and protested when she had to wear one, but this particular skirt was approved by the demanding two-year-old. It was a dark blue cotton skirt and Jane had to admit it looked adorable on her youngest daughter.

After a few moments of blissful silence where Lily sat quietly in her mother's lap, the front door opened and Jane raised her eyebrows when Maura and Anna entered. "Hi peanut! Did you steal Mommy away from work?"

Anna giggled when she ran towards her mother, climbing up on the couch to wrap her arms around her for a tight hug. "Mommy came to pick me up."

Jane felt Lily squirming out of her lap and watched her hopping towards Maura to give her a hug as well, immediately pointing out her knee.

"Oh, what happened, little princess?" Maura gasped and adjusted Lily on her hip to look at her knee.

"I falls!"

"Oh, my poor baby." Maura pressed her lips against Lily's temple and pulled her close before sitting next to her wife to give her a gentle kiss. "Hi, my love."

"Hi." Jane smiled and wrapped her arm around Anna's stomach while she kissed her wife's lips again. "How'd you get home so early?"

"I have to go back in a few minutes, I just took a break to pick Anna up form school."

"Hm." She pouted her lips but chuckled when Maura kissed her again.

"The team misses you," Maura said softly. "The case is getting quite frustrating."

"I know, I'm on it from here." Jane sighed deeply and furrowed her brow. She felt the need to keep herself updated on the case but honestly, she was perfectly fine staying at home with her girls that afternoon. "I'll be back first thing tomorrow."

Maura smiled adoringly. "I know." She kissed her again before pulling back to brush her hand through Anna's hair against Jane's side. "You're needed here today."

Jane looked at Lily who was sitting on the floor and inspecting her knee like she was a professional surgeon that was determining what treatment should be used. She chuckled at the sight, feeling her oldest daughter resting on her chest after a tiring day in school. Maura was right. This was her place for today.


	29. Chapter 29

_A/N I'm uploading two chapters at once because I had them written and nothing big happens anyway, just some good old family fluff. Bigger things are coming up! I hope you enjoyed these chapters, please let me know your thoughts and feelings!_

Chapter 29

 _Four years later. Anna is 10. Lily is 6._

"Mom?" Anna sat on the bench in the backyard, her head resting against her mother's upper arm. "My mother was from Russia, right?"

Maura furrowed her brow in surprise at her daughter's question. She gently brushed her long blond hair back and wrapped her arm around her shoulders. "Yes, she was."

"Does that mean I'm from Russia too?" Anna looked up at her mother with those sparkling grey eyes that only got more beautiful the older she got.

"No, honey. You were born in Boston so you're American." Maura smiled at her oldest daughter. She was growing up so beautifully. She was more comfortable in her own skin but her shy nature still caused her to have trouble with new people and unfamiliar environments. Home was her place. Home was where she blossomed and felt truly comfortable. Her mothers were her safe place and she was an affectionate young girl.

"But I'm part Russian, then. Right?"

"Well… Your nationality is American. But your heritage is Russian, yes."

"Then how come I don't know how to speak Russian?" Anna looked at her mother with curiosity in her eyes, her legs up on the bench as her knees moved from side to side. She was smart. Eager to learn.

"Language is a part of nurture, not of nature."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that language is taught to you after you are born. It's not part of your DNA."

"Is my DNA Russian?" Anna furrowed her brow.

"Partly, yes. I believe your biological father was American so you're only partly Russian." Maura smiled at her little girl and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "Which is why you have those beautiful grey eyes and your long, blond hair and pale skin with those healthy rosy cheeks." Maura gently caressed the girl's pink cheek and softly kissed her forehead. "But after all, you're a Rizzoli. It might not be in your DNA, but you're our little girl."

Anna rested her head back against Maura's arm that was wrapped around her shoulders. "I'm Rizzoli-Isles."

"Well yes, but don't you use Rizzoli most of the time?"

"Yeah 'cause it's shorter but when I write it I always write Rizzoli-Isles." Anna smiled slightly as she stared into the distance. "I'm yours too."

Maura felt her heart swelling with love and pressed her lips against Anna's hairline, pulling her close against her side. "Yes, you are. And I'm so proud of that."

Anna giggled softly. "If I get to be a doctor when I grow up, I'll be sort of Doctor Isles too."

"Well, Doctor Rizzoli-Isles in that case."

Anna shrugged. "I'm just gonna name myself Doctor Isles. 'Cause when people hear the name Doctor Isles they're gonna know I'm a really good doctor." Anna turned her head to look at her mother. "Because of you, y'know?"

Maura smiled proudly, incredibly happy to hear how her daughter looked up at her as a doctor. "Yes, honey."

"But I want to be a different doctor, not a dead people doctor."

Maura laughed. "You have a long time to think about what kind of doctor you want to be."

"Do you think I'm smart enough?" Anna looked into Maura's eyes, her eyes wide with curiosity and childlike innocence.

Maura swallowed a lump in her throat and nodded her head. "Yes, sweetheart. I think you can do anything you set your mind to."

"Anything?"

"Anything."

Anna giggled and pursed her lips. "Then I want to be the president!"

"Well, then you go be the president." Maura laughed and gently pushed Anna's knees back together. "But you know, presidents have to keep their knees together if they are wearing a dress."

Anna burst out in a fit of laughter, throwing her head back against the bench. "The president in a dress?!"

"A female president, yes!" Maura laughed, loving the sound of her daughter's laughter that echoed through the backyard.

"Oh yeah…" Anna's giggles slowly died as she furrowed her brow. "Was there ever a woman for president?"

"No, there hasn't been one yet."

Anna straightened her back and pushed out her chest. "I'm gonna be the first one."

"I think that's an amazing idea for a career plan." Maura chuckled and adjusted Anna's blue dress over her legs, imagining her little girl as the president of the United States. She was too sweet for that but Maura truly believed that Anna could do anything she wanted. She was intelligent and insightful.

It was getting too warm in Boston and Maura felt her thin blouse sticking to her sweaty back, her legs glistening in the sunlight. "We should get inside," she said to her daughter, "to drink something."

Anna nodded and stood up from her seat. "We still have watermelon, right?" 

"We do." Maura smiled at the way Anna's long blond hair danced across her back as she walked towards the backdoor. She followed her and placed a kiss on top of Lily's head as the girl played a game on the iPad on the couch. "Game time is over, sweetheart."

"Just a little more?" Lily turned her attention away from the screen and looked up at her mother with her familiar brown eyes.

"No." Maura shook her head. "You already had ten minutes too long today. You can play a little more after dinner, okay?"

Lily sighed and pouted as she turned off her game and locked the device in her small hands.

"Good girl." Maura smiled at the six-year-old and lifted the girl off the couch, hugging her in her arms. She felt Lily resting her head on her shoulder, her short arms wrapping around her neck. She furrowed her brow. Lily wasn't affectionate like Anna. She was restless and full of energy, no matter what time of the day it was. "What's wrong, baby?" Maura whispered, resting her cheek against the side of Lily's head.

Lily just shrugged and snuggled her skinny body closer against her mother. Lily was taller than Anna was at her age but she already had Jane's figure. A few years ago she had chubby rosy cheeks and an adorable baby belly but that belly was almost gone and her cheekbones were slowly getting just as sharp as her mother's. But her eyes were still big and a deep, chocolate brown with a sparkle that made Maura fall for the girl all over again.

Maura brushed her hand through her daughter's messy curls, smiling slightly when she thought back to that morning when she made an attempt to tie them into a ponytail. Lily kept squirming and running off so eventually Maura just gave up, letting her unruly dark curls dancing around her head. "What's going on, pretty girl?" Maura asked softly as she leaned back against the kitchen counter, pulling Lily against her front.

"I don't wanna go to school tomorrow," Lily replied quietly while she fumbled with the buttons of Maura's blouse, her dark eyes fixated on her small hands.

"Oh sweetheart, you're going to have so much fun in first grade!"

Lily shook her head while tears shimmered in her big eyes. "I don't wanna go."

Maura placed her hand on the back of Lily's head and pulled her to her chest. "And why is that, baby?"

"I wanna stay."

"You want to stay in kindergarten?"

Lily nodded her head. "Can I?"

"No, honey."

Lily sniffled against her mother as her tears slowly started trickling down her cheeks.

"You're going to be amazing, Lily. You're very smart and you easily make new friends. I bet you're going to have a wonderful time." Maura rested her cheek against the side of her daughter's head as she watched Anna carefully cutting her watermelon.

"I'm scared, Mommy," Lily whispered, her small voice barely audible.

Maura felt tears in her eyes and squeezed her little girl close in her arms. It was a big step for Lily to admit she was scared. She felt the pressure to live up to the resemblance she shared with her mother, wanting to be as fierce and fearless as the detective. A part of Maura felt happy the admitted she was scared. "It's okay to be scared, sweetheart," Maura whispered with a kiss on the side of her daughter's head. "It's perfectly normal."

Lily nodded weakly.

"I'd be worried if you weren't a little scared!" Maura pulled back and smiled at her little girl. "Everyone is afraid when they have to go into a new situation. A new school, a new job, new friends… It's all scary."

Lily nodded, looking at her mother with wide eyes. "Yeah…"

"And you know what?" Maura pulled one arm away from underneath her daughter and brushed her curls behind her ear. "It's also so much fun. You get to meet new people and make new friends! You get to learn a lot of new things, like writing and reading and math… Oh you're going to have so much fun, my baby."

"I can write my name," Lily said softly, her middle two fingers in her mouth as her tears slowly trickled down her cheeks.

"Yes, you can." Maura smiled proudly and gently took the girl's fingers out of her mouth before wiping her tears with the back of her hand. "It's going to be great, honey."

"Yeah." Lily smiled through her tears and her breath hitched in her throat before she hid her head into the crook of her mother's neck. "My tummy's tickly," she whispered quietly.

"I know, baby. You're nervous."

"Two more sleeps."

"Yes, two more sleeps." Maura nodded and pressed her lips against her daughter's temple. "But tomorrow, Mama will be home with us and we're going to have a fun day together. Grandma Angela and Uncle Frankie are coming over for dinner, and maybe even Uncle Tommy and TJ."

"Really? Uncle Tommy too?"

"Maybe, he doesn't know if he has to work yet. He's going to try."

Lily smiled against her mother but she missed her usual energy. She was tired.

"Would you like some watermelon as well?" Maura asked softly, rubbing her daughter's back.

Lily nodded and turned her head to look at her older sister who was chewing on a small piece, looking at the both of them with concern in her eyes. Maura smiled a reassuring smile at her oldest daughter who so easily picked up on other people's anxiety. "Do you mind getting your sister a few pieces?"

Anna smiled and immediately grabbed the rest of the watermelon, cutting it as carefully as possible. "You want a big piece or a small piece, Lil?"

"Big." Lily grinned and sniffled the last of her tears away as Maura sat her down on top of the kitchen counter, kissing the girl's forehead before she stepped towards Anna to help her.

Just when she was about to grab a bowl for Lily, the front door opened and Jane walked in, wearing her usual slacks and a red T-shirt, her hair tied up in a ponytail, her skin glistening with sweat as she carried a huge stack of files in her arms.

"Mama!" Lily smiled at the brunette and reached out her short arms towards her mother.

"Hi." Jane hurried towards the little girl before she could jump off the counter, putting the files down before lifting her into the air. "How's my girl?"

"Good." Lily shifted on Jane's hip and allowed her mother to kiss her temple.

"Our little Lily is a bit nervous about going to school on Monday." Maura smiled slightly and stepped towards her wife to kiss her lips. "You're home early."

"Hm." Jane groaned and put Lily back down on the counter. "I have to go through all of these before tomorrow morning."

"All of them?" Maura furrowed her brow at the amount of files on the kitchen counter. "Why?"

"We're looking for a connection between two people, it's supposed to be somewhere in here. Frost took a few too."

Maura sighed deeply. There would be no alone time with her wife tonight.

"Sorry." Jane smiled an apologetic smile and kissed her again before turning towards Anna, placing a kiss on top of her head. "Hi, peanut."

"Hi, Mama." Anna smiled after she swallowed a bite of her watermelon, wrapping her arms around her mother's waist. "Are you home for the rest of the night?"

"Yes, I am." Jane pulled her daughter in her arms, her hand on the back of Anna's head. "But I have a lot of work to do." 

Anna pouted but smiled when she pulled back to look up at her mother. "But you're home for dinner."

Jane chuckled and cupped Anna's face to kiss her forehead. "Yeah, peanut."

"What's for dinner, Mommy?" Lily asked after she picked a piece of watermelon with her fingers.

"Pasta."

"Mac 'n cheese?" Lily's face lit up with an expecting smile.

Maura wrinkled her nose. "Gosh, no."

Lily's smile fell as she lowered her shoulders. "When's we gonna have mac 'n cheese again?"

"When Mommy's away for work again," Jane whispered into Lily's ear, eliciting a disapproving look from her wife.

"I don't have any conferences planned so I have to disappoint you two." Maura shook her head and squeezed Jane's arm as she passed her to grab the first file on the stack. "Now, tell me what to look for."

"What? Maur, you don't have to help me. It's okay." Jane tilted her head and smiled lovingly.

"I want to." Maura sat down on one of the stools at the counter, smiling at her wife. "Let's get this done so our girls can have some Mama-time tonight," she said softly.

Jane smirked, sitting next to the blonde at the counter. "They still need that?"

"They always do." Maura leaned over to kiss her wife's cheek, smiling when she watched their daughters finishing their watermelon and heading towards the living room to find something to play with together.

"I thought that was about babies and that skin-on-skin time you talked about."

"Well yes, but that doesn't mean it's not important for older children." Maura opened the first file but turned her attention towards her wife, leaning forward to thread her hand into her dark curls. "And the same goes for lovers," she whispered into Jane's ear. "Skin on skin time is always needed."

Jane chuckled and looked into Maura's eyes for a moment before capturing her lips in a deep, loving kiss. "Let's finish these as quickly as possible then," she said as they broke apart, both gasping for air.

Maura laughed and kissed her lover's perfect lips again. "I love you," she whispered quietly. "Now explain to me what I'm looking for." She turned back but her wife stopped her by cupping her cheek.

"I love you too," she said softly before kissing her again. "Okay so look for any connection between him," she opened a file and pointed at a picture of a middle-aged man, "and her." She pointed at another file.

"Okay." Maura sighed and studied the file in her hands. "Let's get started."


	30. Chapter 30

Chapter 30

Jane laughed as she watched her oldest daughter running into the water of the sea, water splashing around the girl's legs, her long blond hair sticking to her back as the sun danced on her pale skin. Maura followed closely, holding Lily's hand to keep her from running off by herself. Lily tugged on her mother's hand and laughed loudly as she splashed her, eliciting a playful squeal from the woman. It was the very last day of the girls' summer vacation and the little family was determined to enjoy it to the fullest, so they decided on a trip to the beach.

"Maaaaaaama!" Lily screamed from the beach, waving her short arms at her mother. "Come, Mama!"

Jane chuckled and pulled herself out of her thoughts, running towards her wife and children, helping Lily in splashing Maura and playfully tickling Anna's stomach. They played in the ocean together until the girls got tired and Lily got restless, whining for Maura who had already taken off to lie down to enjoy the sun on her skin.

Anna grabbed Jane's hand and they followed Lily out of the ocean towards Maura. Jane smiled and gently squeezed her daughter's hand. "Are you ready for school tomorrow?"

"Yeah. I'm finally seeing Morgan again." Anna looked up at her mother with sparkling eyes.

Jane smiled at her oldest daughter, feeling a sense of pride as she looked at the gorgeous girl. Anna would be turning heads when she got older, Jane knew it. Her skin was like porcelain but she had rosy cheeks and a healthy glow. Along with her long blond hair that curled around her shoulders, the girl was a beauty and Jane was proud to call Anna her daughter. "Didn't you see Morgan like two weeks ago?" Jane asked with a chuckle.

"That's a long time ago!" Anna looked at her with her brow furrowed, but smiled when she saw the smile on Jane's face. "She's my best friend."

"It's amazing to have a best friend." Jane sat down next to her wife, taking Anna in between her legs. Maura was lying on her back, her head turned to listen to Lily who was telling her about the shells by the sea, showing them proudly.

"Yeah. I hope we're gonna be friends for a long time," Anna said softly, resting back against Jane's front as she fumbled with the hem of her bathing suit.

Jane kissed Anna's wet hair. "I think you will be."

"Did you have a best friend too when you were ten like me?" she asked, turning sideways to look at Jane.

"I had more good friends when I was your age. When I was older, your mom became my best friend."

Anna furrowed her brow and giggled. "Mom?"

"Yes?" Maura turned her head towards Anna, thinking she called her.

"You and Mama were best friends?"

Maura smiled and sat up with her legs crossed. "We still are."

Anna giggled again. "You're married!"

"You can be best friends when you're married!"

"But…" Anna's smile fell and she got lost in thought for a moment, "so… You got married to your best friend?" she asked Jane, looking up at her.

Jane smiled and brushed her daughter's wet hair back. "Yeah."

"I think it would be fun to be married to your best friend," Anna said softly as she leaned sideways in her mother's arms. "'Cause then you already know each other."

"That's true. I knew your mom for a few years before we got married."

"Did you become best friends right when you met her?"

Jane chuckled, looking at her beautiful wife next to her as she thought back to the first time they met. "No, she didn't exactly like me when we first met."

"Really?" Anna's mouth fell open and she looked at Maura with wide eyes. "You didn't like Mama?"

Maura laughed. "Well, Mama wasn't very nice to me."

"You cut the line! I needed my coffee!"

"I was simply trying to help." Maura chuckled and grabbed a juice box from her bag, opening it and handing it to Lily who was trying to build something that could have been a sandcastle.

"Your Mom wanted to pay for my coffee," Jane explained to her oldest daughter. "And she got all doctor-y on me, y'know like only Mommy can."

Anna giggled, resting her head against her mother's chest, her wet hair cold on Jane's skin. "She wanted to help you, right Mom?"

Maura smiled at her daughter while she brushed her fingers through Lily's curls next to her. "I did."

"I was just stupid." Jane smirked and rested her chin on top of Anna's head, looking lovingly at her wife. "Good thing I got over that soon and we became good friends."

"And then we fell in love and got married and you girls came!" Maura said while she attempted to braid Lily's messy curls but the girl was already squirming away. She chuckled and shook her head, giving up on her attempt quickly.

They played on the beach until it was time to go home to the family dinner for that night, which turned out to be loud and warm as usual. Jane loved her family but it left both her girls exhausted by the end of the night.

Angela was the last one to leave and Anna was reading a book on the couch, something she did as often as she possibly could. She devoured all the books that came her way and would be reading all day and night if she could.

Just after Jane finished putting Lily to bed, she heard the doorbell ringing. She heard Maura opening the door and a male voice greeting her. Her brow furrowed as she walked downstairs, curious to see who was visiting them. She felt like her heart skipped a beat when she saw Ian Faulkner standing in the doorway. She felt like her heart actually stopped when she saw the smile on her wife's face. Maura's eyes were sparkling in a way they only should when she looked at Jane.

"Ian." She walked towards him and shook his hands, not a single hint of a smile on her face.

"Jane! So nice to see you again."

"Hm." Jane just hummed and stepped back next to Maura, possessively placing her hand on her lower back. "What brings you here?"

"Well I was in the neighborhood, and I wondered how Dr. Isles is doing. Wondered if she might need some toilet paper and wine" Ian smiled that ridiculous smile that made Maura giggle.

"Thanks but we're all set."

"Jane." Maura glared at her wife and moved away to let Ian into the house. "Would you like a drink?"

"Please." He put his bag on the floor and walked in, stopping in surprise when he saw Anna on the couch. He looked at Maura, confused.

"This is our daughter Anna." Maura smiled proudly and tucked a strand of hair behind her daughter's ear as Anna nervously watched the unfamiliar man in the house.

"Nice to meet you, I'm Ian." He held out his hand and Anna shook it, only increasing the burning in Jane's stomach.

She gritted her teeth and unconsciously balled her fists. She hated that man. She hated his smile. His ears. The way he looked at Maura. The way Maura looked at him.

"Wine?" Maura smiled and got out two wine glasses. One for her and one for him.

"Oh, yes." Ian smiled gratefully and sat down at one of the stools at the kitchen counter. "You have a beautiful daughter."

"Thank you." Maura poured the wine and handed him the glass. "We have two, actually."

"Two?"

"Yes, Lily. She's already sleeping."

"How old?"

"Ten and six." Maura sipped on her own wine and leaned against the counter. "We adopted Anna and then had Lily ourselves."

Jane didn't know why, but the fact that Maura had to emphasize that part annoyed her. There was no difference between their adopted daughter and their biological daughter. They were both their daughters and that was all Ian needed to know.

"Well you did an amazing job." Ian nodded his head and sipped his wine, humming contently as the taste filled his mouth.

Jane wrinkled her nose.

"How have you been?" Maura asked, her voice sincere.

"Good, I've been on the road for quite a while."

"How'd that road lead you here?" Jane asked, still not knowing why he suddenly showed up on a random Sunday evening. He hadn't shown any interest in Maura for years except for a phone call every now and then.

Ian turned his head and smiled that awful, crooked smile. "I can't pass up on an opportunity to visit when I'm in Boston, right?"

"Guess not." Jane gritted her teeth and sighed deeply to compose herself, eliciting another glare from Maura. Jane shrugged and turned towards Anna. "Come on, Anna. It's time for bed." She didn't want to be in the same room as him. She didn't want to be in the same room with her wife who was looking at him like that.

"One more chapter?"

"You can read one more in bed." Jane stroked her daughter's cheek and gently pulled her up from the couch, taking her hand to lead her upstairs. "Go give your mom a kiss goodnight."

Anna nodded her head, ever the good girl. She walked towards Maura and reached up her arms to silently ask for a hug, which Maura happily gave her. She put down her wine glass and kissed her daughter's cheek before pulling her close. "Sleep well, sweetheart."

"'Night, Mom." Anna quickly glanced at Ian but followed Jane upstairs without noticing him further.

"She's quite shy," Jane heard Maura say as she followed Anna upstairs.

"Mama?" Anna turned at the top of the stairs. "Who is that?"

Jane sighed, taking Anna's hand to lead her to her bedroom. "That's Ian. He's a doctor too. He's… He's a friend of Mom's."

"I've never seen him before." Anna furrowed her brow, put her book on her bed and started taking off her dress. "They're not very good friends, then."

"No, they used to be." Jane felt the heavy ball in her stomach turning and twitching as she handed Anna her pajamas.

Anna looked at her mother, studying her intently. "You don't like him, do you?"

Jane smirked and pulled Anna's pajama shirt over her head. "Nah."

"Why not?"

Jane shrugged. "Just because. Go brush your teeth, baby." She watched Anna heading towards the bathroom to do as she was told. She didn't know why this was bothering her so much. She didn't know why she was so jealous. They had been married for over a decade and Jane knew Maura loved her with all she had. But the way she looked at Ian bothered Jane. There was something there. A sparkle. A sparkle that shouldn't be there.

She put Anna to bed, giving her kisses and 'I love you's' and telling her to really stop reading after one more chapter before she headed back downstairs. She stopped on the stairs when she heard Maura laughing. She loved that laugh. That laugh was hers. She heard them talking about something in Africa, something about their past. The past they shared together. The past Jane wasn't part of.

Tears burned in Jane's eyes and she turned back to walk upstairs, feelings of doubt suddenly crashing her down. She knew Maura was bisexual. She knew she was attracted to both men and women. Yes, Maura chose to be with her but what if that changed upon seeing Ian? What if he stirred up old feelings? What if… There were so many what ifs Jane's head was spinning.

She walked into her bedroom and let herself fall on the bed. A part of Jane knew she was being crazy. Jane knew Maura loved her. She knew she would never leave her. But why was she feeling so broken and full of doubt? Why was she suddenly wondering what in the world she had to offer Maura? What if Ian could offer more?

Questions raced through her mind until about an hour later when she heard the front door again, signaling that Ian was leaving. Just a few moments later she heard soft footsteps walking up the stairs, the door opening only seconds later.

"Jane." Maura walked towards the bed and sat on the edge of it. "What's going on?"

Jane just shrugged and didn't reply.

"You were a little rude to him, Jane."

"Don't like him."

"You've always disliked him." Maura sighed and looked at the wall. "Why?"

Jane turned her attention towards her wife, her expression blank. "Because you're mine."

Maura's brow furrowed. "Excuse me?"

"You're mine."

"First of all, I will have you know that I am not anyone's property." Maura stood up from the bed and straightened her back, seeming truly annoyed. "And second of all, are you seriously jealous?"

Jane didn't answer her wife's question and just sat up against the headboard. Was she jealous? Probably.

"We've been together for almost fifteen years!" Maura lifted her hands in frustration. "I married you, for God's sake!"

"I know."

"You know?" Maura raised her eyebrows and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Then why in the world are you being so childish?

"Childish?" This time Jane was the one with anger in her voice.

"Yes! Jane, I'm growing old with you! I have children with you, I LOVE YOU!" She yelled her last words in frustration.

Jane was surprised by her wife's sudden anger and couldn't find the words to reply.

Maura took a deep breath to calm herself down and sat back down next to Jane on the bed. "Yesterday, I looked in the mirror and saw that I desperately need to make an appointment with my hairdresser because my grey hairs are starting to show. And you know what? It made me smile. It made me smile because I'm growing older. I'm growing old with the people I love most in my life." She turned her attention towards her wife. "I'm growing old with you. And that, Jane," she placed her hand on Jane's upper leg, gently taking her hand in hers, "that makes me the happiest woman on earth."

A few tears trickled down Jane's cheeks and she swallowed a large lump in her throat. "I'm sorry," she whispered through her tears. "I was being stupid."

Maura nodded. "You were. Why?"

Jane sighed deeply, looking intently at her beautiful wife. "The way you look at him is just still so… I don't know. There's something there and it bothered me. But I know you love me and I was stupid for doubting that."

"I do love you," Maura whispered while she wiped Jane's tears with the back of her hand. "And yes, there is something between me and Ian."

"What?"

"History. That's what's between him and me, and that's all it will ever be." Maura shrugged her shoulders and smiled slightly. "He was the man I loved. I still feel attraction towards him, yes."

Concern and jealousy started bubbling in Jane's stomach again.

"But my love," Maura cupped Jane's cheek and looked deeply into her eyes, "that is nothing compared to what I feel for you."

The doubts in Jane slowly faded when she saw the amount of love that showed in those hazel eyes she loved so much.

"Don't ever doubt that, Jane," Maura said strictly.

Jane shook her head. "I won't. I'm sorry- I-… He just has so much more to offer, y'know?"

"What? What does he have to offer?" Maura furrowed her brow. "A steady job? A family? Care? No-… No, none of those things. You are all I want, he can't offer me anything you can't offer me a million times more and better."

"I-… He's got a dick."

"Excuse me?" 

"I can't offer you that." Jane slightly tilted her head and smirked, trying to get out of the tension she felt in herself.

"God Jane, you're incorrigible." Maura shook her head and leaned forward to capture Jane's lips in a loving kiss. "You have proven various ways to offer me that," she whispered against her lips, her breath tickling Jane's skin. "And more."

Jane smiled a small smile and kissed her wife again, resting her forehead against hers. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I love you."

"Apology accepted." Maura moved closer towards her wife and wrapped her arms around the brunette, pulling her as close as possible. "I love you too."


	31. Chapter 31

_A/N Wow, I did not expect the amount of response I got on the last chapter. I disagree with the people that called Maura a bitch. Yes, she was wrong for telling Ian that Anna was adopted but in my opinion, Maura states facts. She's rational. It's a fact they adopted Anna. That doesn't make them love her any less. As said in this chapter, a daughter is a daughter. Adopted or not. Maybe she was wrong, but I decided to let it go because it felt like it fit her character. As for Ian, I know it's very possible to have a hint of feelings for someone you once loved. Like Maura said, it's nothing compared to what she has with Jane. She committed her life to Jane. Her love for her is real, so Ian is not a threat. Maura chose Jane. People have been asking a lot about a little jealousy from Jane's side but I guess it's not appreciated when I write it. I apologize and won't do it again._

 _I'm getting more into the adoption part of Anna's life in the next few chapters. I'm asking you to please be nice and know that the words you type have an impact on a real person. Calling 'my' characters assholes or saying I'm stupid or hated affects me, a real person with feelings and thoughts._

 _Two years later. Anna is twelve. Lily is eight._

Chapter 31

"Anna?" Maura knocked on her daughter's bedroom door, wondering what in the world her twelve-year-old was up to. She had been spending a lot of time in her room or working on the family laptop, doing who knows what.

"Yeah?"

"Can I come in?"

Anna ruffled with something for a while before answering. "Yeah!"

Maura opened the door and watched her daughter closing the laptop, turning on her seat behind her small desk to look at her mother. "What's up?"

Maura smiled, looking into her eyes. Anna was growing more and more beautiful the older she got. She was already turning heads and Maura knew she would only get prettier. Sometimes that scared Maura. Anna had no interest in boys whatsoever, but she knew how the hormones of teenage boys could get. She wasn't eager for her little girl to grow up.

She pulled herself out of her thoughts and shook her head. "I can ask you the same, honey. What's up?"

Anna shrugged. "Nothing. Doing homework."

Maura furrowed her brow. "Well, your backpack is still in the kitchen." She tilted her head and crossed her arms in front of her chest, turning into her strict mother-mode. "Why are you lying to me, Anna?"

Anna blushed and averted her gaze. She didn't reply.

"Anna?" When her daughter didn't reply, Maura sighed and dropped her arms. "Okay, you've been acting strange lately. You're not yourself. I understand if you're having a hard time and need some space but you can't lie to us, young lady."

"I-… I…" Anna shook her head and tears formed in her grey eyes.

Maura sighed. "I would like the laptop back, please."

"No…" Anna looked back up at her mother, eyes pleading.

"Yes. I'll hold on to it while you think about how you are lying to your mother and figure out a way to apologize and tell me what's going on." Maura felt concern burning in the pit of her stomach but she knew she had to keep her foot down. She took the laptop from Anna's desk and turned back to walk out of the room, tears burning in her eyes when she closed the door behind her.

Anna wasn't herself. She was the sweetest girl on the planet. She would never hurt a fly. She always listened to her parents and she never lied. Something was going on and Maura knew she had to give her daughters space but she worried about Anna.

She walked back downstairs when she heard the front door opening. She smiled when Jane and Lily walked in, playfully wrestling together. Maura shook her head when she saw her daughter's stained jeans. "God Lily, you put those on clean this morning!"

"Mama tackled me!" the eight-year old playfully hit Jane's arm, smirking up at her mother. It was like watching a miniature Jane Rizzoli. Lily's curls were so similar to Jane's although they were getting less thick the older she got. She had the same smile and the same eyes but Lily was more fragile. But, she shared Jane's spirit for baseball and according to her mother, she was quite good at it.

"Of course she did." Maura pursed her lips and shook her head, stepping towards her wife to kiss her lips. "Hi."

"Hi." Jane smiled and kissed her again, her kisses still making Maura's head spin after all those years of marriage. "You okay?"

Maura sighed, shrugging her shoulders. "I'm not sure. I think I might have had an argument with Anna." 

Jane furrowed her brow. "What? That's a first…"

"She's been so private lately! I asked what she was doing and she lied to me." Maura felt tears in her eyes, thinking about her good, sweet daughter upstairs. "I took the laptop away."

"Wow, consequences." Jane smirked and nodded. "Good."

"I hate it."

"Well, she lied! Punishment is the thing she needs."

"Anna got punished?" Lily asked, her eyes wide in surprise. "Finally! You only punish me all the time!"

"Don't exaggerate, miss." Maura pointed her finger at her youngest daughter.

"You punished me yesterday!"

"You broke my new vase!"

"It was an accident!"

Jane sighed and placed her hand on Maura's upper arm. "Maur. We already had this argument."

Maura closed her eyes for a moment to calm herself down. Lily was right. They punished her more often than they punished Anna. But Lily could be so reckless. She said things without thinking and just didn't stop running in the house. She opened her eyes again and looked at the beautiful little girl that was hers. No matter how many times she had to punish her, she would never stop falling for those dark eyes. She would never stop loving that little rug rat.

"I'm sorry." Maura smiled and cupped Lily's face, leaning down to press her lips against her forehead.

Lily smiled. "I'm sorry too, Mommy. For breaking the vase." She smirked and hugged her mother for a short moment before pulling back. "Even though it was ugly."

"Oh!" Maura gasped and playfully slapped Lily's arm. "Go get out of those jeans so I can try to get those stains out before they set."

Lily giggled and unbuttoned her jeans, sliding it down her legs before hopping out of it and running upstairs.

Maura sighed and shook her head. "How many times do I have to tell you it's inappropriate to run around in your underwear?!" she called after the fast girl.

"One more time!" Lily called back, laughing at herself.

Maura smiled slightly, unable to stop herself. "I wonder where she gets that." She looked into Jane's eyes and tucked a loose curl behind her ear. "Did you have fun?"

"Yeah." Jane smiled lovingly and leaned forward to kiss her wife's lips. "She's gonna be amazing."

Maura wrapped her arms around the brunette's waist and hugged her tight, resting her head into the crook of Jane's neck. "She already is."

"She's not easy, though."

Maura shook her head. "No kids are easy."

"Well, I thought Anna was up until now." Jane pulled back and kissed her wife again before looking at the laptop on the kitchen counter. "Have you checked her internet history?"

"Are we supposed to do that?" Maura furrowed her brow and untangled her arms from around her love. "Maybe we should let her keep her privacy and let her come to us herself."

"What if she found an online boyfriend that turns out to be a sixty-year-old dirtbag?"

"God!" Maura gasped and shook her head. "No, we have to respect her privacy."

Jane sighed deeply. "Yeah, okay."

"Mom?"

Maura turned her head and saw Anna standing at the entrance of the kitchen, fumbling with the hem of her sweater. Her long blond curls were hanging loose around her face as tears slowly trickled down her cheeks. "Honey?" Maura furrowed her brow in concern.

"You ready to talk?" Jane asked softly, pulling out one of the chairs at the dining table for Anna to sit down. The girl slowly walked towards it and sat down, Jane and Maura taking place on either side of her.

"What is going on with you, my sweet girl?" Maura whispered while she brushed her daughter's hair out of her face.

Anna sniffled and wiped her tears with the back of her hand. She stood up and for a moment, Maura thought she was walking out on them until she saw her grabbing the laptop from the kitchen counter and sitting back down. She opened it and clicked on a website she saved.

Maura furrowed her brow and looked at the page. It seemed like a biography page for Alexandra Babrichev.

"What's this?" Jane asked, studying the picture of the woman on top of the website.

"This…" Anna sighed and tears strangled her voice. "It's my mother."

Maura gasped softly and leaned closer towards the laptop, looking at the picture of the woman that now suddenly seemed awfully familiar. She saw Anna's grey eyes and blond hair, her facial features and softness in the older woman that smiled at them from the screen. "H-how did you find her?"

Anna shrugged, wiping her cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. "Research."

"But… How?" Jane's brow was furrowed and she turned the laptop to scroll through the page.

"I asked Ahmed. He had a name and I found her on the internet"

"Oh…" Maura looked at her daughter and saw that silent tears were still trickling down her cheeks. "Honey, why didn't you tell us?"

Anna shrugged again. "I'm sorry."

"What did you find?" Jane leaned her elbow on the table to look intently at the young teenager next to her.

Anna took a deep breath to compose herself and straightened her back. "She was a psychology professor at a university in Novosibirsk."

"Wow." Maura raised her eyebrows in awe. That's where Anna's intelligence came from.

"Yeah!" Anna smiled through her tears, the tears telling Maura that there was more to this story.

"She started when she was only thirty and she was the best. I read this review that said she was the favorite with the students." Anna smiled proudly, moving the laptop to click to another page, all in Russian.

"Wait-, since when do you read Russian?" Jane asked confused.

"Google Translate." Anna shrugged and continued scrolling. "This says she's one of the best in the entire university." Her lips curled up into a proud smile before she sighed and her smile fell. "But then I couldn't find anything from the university after she worked there for like, five years."

"Only five years?"

Anna nodded. "Yeah. I-… She apparently quit her job."

"Why?"

"She got a boyfriend," she whispered, her voice suddenly laced with sadness. "Or at least I think she thought she did."

"What happened?" Maura felt her stomach stinging at the amount of pain that showed in her daughter's eyes.

"She met a guy, he was from America. She told the university she was getting a job in America so she quit her job in Russia to move there." Anna sighed deeply. "And then I couldn't find anything of her working anywhere in America."

Maura sensed that Anna wasn't finished yet. The worse was yet to come. She gently reached out and wiped her daughter's cheek with the back of her fingers, silently asking her to continue.

"But then I found this." She clicked on a folder she saved and her breath hitched in her throat.

Jane raised her eyebrows. "Jesus, these are police records! How did you get in here?"

"Google." Anna shrugged her shoulders again.

Maura didn't listen. She was too engrossed in reading the file. Now she understood why her daughter was so sad. She understood why she was in so much pain. These were human trafficking reports. "Honey…"

Anna shook her head as fresh tears started streaming down her face. "She was sold, Mom! Some dude told her a bunch of lies and she was _stupid_ enough to believe him!" Anna yelled, her voice strangled with tears. "She followed him for a job and then she was sold!" She stood up and started pacing through the kitchen, her arms wrapped tightly around her thin waist. "She was sold for SEX!"

"Baby, calm down," Maura said softly, noticing how Anna's breath was increasing rapidly.

"Calm down? Mom! My mother got pregnant and died, because of me!" Anna's tears were streaming down as she tried her best to regulate her breathing. "Some gross, GROSS dude got her pregnant for money and that made me!"

Maura sighed deeply, tears forming in her eyes at her daughter's words. "Honey…"

"How is that fair, Mom?"

"It's not."

"M-my mom was being sold for sex and then she accidentally got pregnant and that baby was me and then she died." Anna stopped pacing and lowered her head, crawling back into her shell after her breakout. "She died because of me."

"That's not true, peanut," Jane whispered. "She died because of the awful person that dragged her into that horrible business."

"And I came out of it. I came from that."

Maura shook her head, feeling hot tears trickling down her cheeks. She reached out her hand to gently grab her daughter's arm, pulling the short teenager into her lap. "No, baby," she whispered through her tears. "You're ours."

Anna sniffled and hid herself in her mother's chest, curling up in Maura's lap while Jane comfortingly rubbed her back. "She was so smart," Anna said softly, her voice laced with tears. "It's not fair."

Maura stared at the picture on the laptop, looking at the beautiful young woman that was her daughter's biological mother. "You're right," Maura whispered. "It's not fair." She looked at Jane and saw pain in her wife's eyes as she smiled sadly.

After a few moments of tear-filled silence, Lily slowly walked towards the three of them, her eyes wide in concern. "What's wrong?"

Jane sighed deeply and gently pulled Lily in between her legs, her arms wrapping around the girl's small waist. She raised her eyebrows at Maura and Maura nodded her head, silently telling her wife to tell Lily the truth. "Anna found out something about her biological mother that upset her," Jane said softly. "You know how we told you someone else gave birth to Anna?"

Lily nodded, still looking at her crying sister. "Yeah."

"Well, Anna found out that woman was treated very badly. She passed away while giving birth to your sister."

"That's so sad…" Lily's brow furrowed and she leaned into Jane's arms. "You never met her?"

Anna shook her head, her breath hitching in her throat as she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. "No."

Maura gently brushed her hand through Anna's blond hair and kissed the top of her head that rested on her chest. She hated seeing her girl so in pain. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart," Maura whispered, not knowing what else to say.

"I'm sorry for not telling you," Anna said quietly, her cheeks blushing red.

"I understand." Maura sighed deeply and looked at her wife over Anna's head, watching her brushing Lily's messy curls back. "Although I would have preferred it if you hadn't been through this by yourself," Maura whispered.

Anna slowly nodded her head. "I was afraid you would be mad."

"Mad?" Jane furrowed her brow and lifted her chin from resting on top of Lily's head. "Why would we be mad?"

"I don't know…" Anna shrugged. "Just… You're my moms. She's-… Not really my mom."

Maura sighed. "She is," she replied quietly. "She gave birth to you. We are your mothers but but that doesn't mean your biological mother doesn't exist any longer."

"I just… I just want you to be my real moms." Anna fumbled with a button on Maura's blouse. "You know, like you are Lily's."

"Real moms?" Jane furrowed her brow, her hands resting on Lily's stomach. "We're both as real as it gets, peanut."

"No I mean… Birth moms."

"Well, we're still your real moms, even if we didn't give birth to you. And finding your biological mother doesn't change anything."

"Yeah but I'm still adopted."

"So?" Maura furrowed her brow and slightly pulled back to look at her oldest daughter. "You're adopted, that's a fact. But do you have any idea how much we love you? How you made our lives so much better just be being here? You're our daughter, Anna. Adopted or not. A daughter is a daughter and that's it."

"You're not mad?" Anna lifted her head and looked up at her mother, her grey eyes shimmering with tears.

"No, pretty girl," Maura whispered. "Not even a little bit."

"You were mad before, Mommy," Lily said, always on point.

Maura tilted her head. "Yes, because Anna lied to me." Maura looked at Anna and lifted her chin to look into her eyes. "I still don't approve of that, miss."

Fresh tears sprung to Anna's eyes and Maura almost gave into her right there. But she knew she had to be strict with her oldest daughter. "I'm sorry, Mom."

Maura nodded. "Thank you." She kissed Anna's cheek before gently pulling back to look at Jane, seeing a loving smile curling her lips, her dark eyes shimmering. "Go give your Ma a hug, she's about to cry."

Lily giggled and looked up at Jane, pointing at her eyes. "Yeah!"

"Shut up." Jane playfully pushed her to the side and reached out her arms for Anna, gently pulling her off Maura's lap and into her arms. Anna chuckled and wrapped her arms around her mother's neck as Jane kissed the side of her head. "I love you, peanut," Jane whispered softly.

"Love you too, Mama."

Maura smiled at the sight and felt Lily standing up on her toes next to her. "Mommy," she whispered in her mother's ear, "did Anna get punished?"

Maura sighed deeply. "No, baby. I think she's been punished enough."

Lily pouted and crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Not fair."

"Oh, stop it." Maura shook her head, pulling her little girl into her arms and kissing her temple. "You know we love you just as much as your sister."

"Yeah?" Lily giggled and squirmed into her mother's arms, her short arms wrapping around Maura's neck.

"Yes," Maura chuckled as she pulled her youngest daughter as close as possible. "I love you with all my heart."

Lily wrinkled her nose but Maura saw a sweet smile curling her lips. Lily tried to be as tough as her detective mother, but she was just a little girl that loved to be in her mothers' arms. "Love you too, Mommy," Lily said softly before turning in Maura's arms, leaning back into her front to look back at her sister. "Is Anna gonna be okay?"

Maura sighed deeply and looked at her oldest daughter, watching her standing in between Jane's legs as Jane looked at her and gently caressed her cheek, speaking quiet words of comfort while the girl cried her last tears. "I hope so, baby," Maura replied before kissing the back of Lily's head. "I hope so."


	32. Chapter 32

Chapter 32

"Lily? Can you come sit down for a minute?" Jane asked her daughter, patting the spot next to her on the couch.

Lily furrowed her brow and slowly walked towards her mothers, hesitant to get punished for whatever she did.

"We got a message from Mike's mother," Maura said, sitting on the other side of the eight-year-old.

"What did I do?" Lily raised her dark eyebrows.

"You don't know?"

Lily furrowed her brow and stared at the wall. "Because I told Mike his hair looks like a mop?"

Jane couldn't help but chuckle, but her smile fell when she saw the glaring look in her wife's eyes. "No."

"You got into a fight," Maura said strictly. "At the park, this afternoon."

"Ohh, that!" Lily nodded but she abruptly stopped when she looked at her mother.

"Yes, that!" Maura furrowed her brow. "Please tell me why you got into a fight, young lady!"

"They were making fun of Anna!" Lily pointed at her sister in the kitchen where she was reading a book at the dinner table.

"What?" Jane shot her attention towards her eight-year-old.

"They were laughing at her!"

"That doesn't justify you hitting someone, Lillian," Maura said in her strict, motherly voice.

Lily's eyes widened when she heard her mother calling her by her full name. She lowered her head and mumbled a quiet 'sorry'.

"Excuse me? I didn't hear you."

"I'm sorry."

Maura nodded her head. "Good."

"You should apologize to the kid you fought with," Jane said to the little girl next to her. "Can you promise me you'll do that tomorrow, baby?"

"Okay." Lily nodded and her expression turned to sadness.

"Now," Maura said softly, tucking a dark curl behind Lily's ear to be able to look at her face, "why were they making fun of Anna?"

"They do it all the time," Lily whispered.

Jane felt a heavy ball dropping to her stomach, looking at the beautiful young girl at the dinner table. How could anyone make fun of a girl like Anna? She wouldn't hurt a fly. She was the most intelligent of her class and without a doubt the prettiest. Lily often went to play baseball at the park and this time Anna joined her for once while they waited for their mothers to pick them up after work. Jane had no idea Lily's friends were talking about Anna like this. "What are they saying?"

"That's she's a nerd…" Lily nervously fumbled with her hands in her lap. "'Cause she's always reading books and she doesn't want to play baseball. They said she's boring and stupid." Tears filled Lily's eyes and she wiped them quickly. "I told 'em Anna's smarter than all of them and that they were stupid for saying stupid things like that." Lily sniffled and frantically wiped her tears again. "Then I hit him and he hit me back and we got into a fight."

Tears burned in Jane's eyes while she listened to her daughter's words. A part of her was proud of Lily for standing up for her sister, but another part of her knew it was wrong for her to hit someone.

"I'm glad you called them out on talking badly about Anna, honey," Maura said softly. "But you know hitting someone isn't a solution."

"I know. I j-just go so mad!"

Jane nodded and gently brushed her daughter's dark curls back, caressing her rosy cheek. She understood. She understood so well. Lily was so much like her and she recognized the feeling of just losing yourself in anger, wanting to protect the people you love at all cost.

"I'll apologize tomorrow."

"Good girl," Maura whispered, wrapping her arm around Lily's shoulder to pull her close and press her lips against her temple.

Lily smiled sadly, leaning into her mother's side. "They are so mean about Anna," Lily whispered quietly. "And they're too afraid to say anything to her, so they only talk about her behind her back. They're such cowards! Stupid, stupid cowards!" Lily raised her voice and her hands balled up into fists.

Maura untangled her arm and gently took her daughters hands in hers, carefully unclenching them as she caressed her palms. Jane smiled at the resemblance. Maura did the same with her. When Jane was angry, she balled her fists. Maura was the only one that could unclench them and calm her down. She was the only one that was allowed to massage the scars in her palms.

"Shh," Maura soothed, her fingers gently massaging Lily's hands. "I know, baby."

"Next time they say something like that, just ignore them," Jane said softly. She wanted so badly to tell Lily to tell those kids the next time they had something on Anna, they should come talk to detective Jane freaking Rizzoli. She wanted to tell Lily to punch them to the ground the next time they talked about her sister. She wanted to go kick those kids herself.

"That's right," Maura replied with a kiss on Lily's head. "Just ignore them and they'll stop eventually."

"I'm not gonna let them talk about Anna like that!" Lily lifted her head and looked at her mother with her brow furrowed. "They don't even know how smart she is! She's almost as smart as you, Mom!"

Maura sighed deeply, her lips curling up into a slight smile. "She's quite intelligent for her age, yes."

"And she's prettier too! I don't get why they are being so stupid! They barely even know her!"

"Calm down, baby," Jane said softly, her hand brushing up and down Lily's back when she watched her daughter getting worked up again. "If it goes on like this, we'll have a talk with them. Okay?"

Lily nodded. "Okay." She looked up at Jane and smirked. "You gonna kick their ass?"

"Lily!" Maura gasped and pinched the girl's leg. "Watch your language."

"Ow, Mommy!" Lily chuckled and wiped the last of her tears.

"Oh stop it." Maura smiled and tickled Lily's side, eliciting sweet giggles from the girl.

Jane chuckled at the sight but her smile fell when she turned her attention towards her oldest daughter at the dinner table. She was sitting sideways in her chair with her head hanging low, silent tears trickling down her cheeks. Jane stood up and walked towards the young teenager, kneeling down on the floor in front of her. She gently lifted Anna's chin and wiped her tears. "Hey, peanut…"

Anna sniffled and used the sleeve of her sweater to wipe her cheeks. She heard more of their conversation than they knew. "It's true what Lily said, isn't it?" Jane whispered.

Anna nodded, fresh tears streaming down her face.

"You've never told us…"

"I try to ignore them." Anna shrugged while she used both her hands to tuck her hair behind her ears. "They don't hurt me or anything. They just talk about me, that's all."

"But that hurts too, doesn't it?"

Anna's bottom lip quivered and she shook her head. "It's okay."

"It's not." Jane leaned up to press her lips against Anna's forehead before looking at Maura and Lily in the living room. Maura had pulled Lily into her lap and was looking at the both of them with tears in her eyes. "Does it ever happen in school?" Jane asked quietly.

Anna shrugged. "Sometimes. But mostly it's just Matt and a few girls, the others are nice."

"Matt?"

"Matt is Mike's brother," Lily said from the living room, listening intently to their conversation.

"Matt and Mike? Wow, those parents were at loss for inspiration." Jane furrowed her brow and smirked while she took Anna's place in her chair, gently pulling the twelve-year-old into her lap. "C'mere, peanut."

Anna hid herself in her mother's strong arms, her head resting on Jane's chest. "They're just stupid kids, Ma," she whispered. "That's all." 

"That's right, baby." Jane smiled and brushed Anna's blond hair back. "Nothing they say is true. You're so smart and so pretty and they're just jealous."

"They say I'm a nerd because I'm smart," Anna whispered, her voice laced with defeat.

Jane sighed deeply. Anna was smarter than most kids her age. She read books far above her grade and she was excelling in both math and science. She loved to learn. Jane was beyond proud of her little girl and it killed her that other kids were calling her names like that. "You know what?" Jane whispered, resting her cheek against her daughter's forehead. "They used to call your mom a nerd too. They called her boring and a know-it-all."

"Really?" Anna furrowed her brow.

"Yeah. But look at her now." Jane smiled and looked at her wife in the living room, watching the most beautiful blonde she was so proud to call her wife. "They got nothing on her anymore, right?"

Anna shook her head, smiling slightly. "Mom's the Chief Medical Examiner."

"That's right. Those kids can call you a lot of things but you're better than all of them." Jane squeezed her daughter impossibly closer in her arms. "You're so good, baby. So good, so sweet and so caring." 

Anna sniffled, fresh tears filling her eyes. She slightly shook her head.

"You have no idea what a blessing you are, peanut," Jane whispered to the beautiful young teenager in her arms. She couldn't believe how quickly Anna was growing up. It seemed like yesterday they met her as a shy, quiet three-year-old. Anna enriched their lives in every way possible and the past nine years had been the best years of Jane's life. And now Anna was twelve, growing into a teenager way too quickly and Lily was eight, growing taller and taller and looking more and more like her with every day that passed. And every day, Jane fell more and more in love with motherhood. Her daughters were everything. "They don't know anything about you," Jane continued quietly. "They don't know how sweet you are, how much you love the people around you… They don't see how beautiful you are and how intelligent you are."

Anna's lips curled up into a sad smile against her mother's chest.

"They're stupid." Jane smirked and pulled her daughter closer. "And if they do it again," she whispered in Anna's ear, "you just tell me and I'll come kick their butts, okay?"

A small giggle escaped the girl and she shook her head. "Mom's gonna be mad if you do that."

"Oh yeah." Jane nodded, laughing at her daughter's statement. "So mad."

Anna laughed and moved up to wrap her arms around Jane's neck, squeezing hard. "Thanks, Mama," she whispered.

"You're welcome, peanut," Jane smiled while she hugged her oldest daughter in her arms. "I love you."

"Love you too." She pulled back and smiled shyly before getting off her mother's lap and taking a deep breath to compose herself.

While Anna was standing up, Maura got off the couch and headed towards her oldest daughter, brushing her hand through the girl's blond hair when she reached her. She kissed the back of her head and sighed deeply. She didn't speak, the sweet gesture telling Anna all she needed to hear. Maura and Anna didn't need words in situations like this. They needed the most complicated words in the world when it came to talking about books, but with things like this, a simple kiss or a quick hug was enough. "What would you like to drink?" Maura asked softly, resting her cheek against Anna's temple.

Anna shrugged. "I'm not thirsty."

"You should drink something, honey. You cried out all those tears and now you need to fill up again."

Anna chuckled quietly. "Yeah, okay. Lemonade."

"Yellow or red?"

"Yellow."

"Coming right up." Maura kissed Anna's cheek and walked towards the fridge, grabbing the yellow lemonade. "Lily? Red or yellow?"

"Red! I don't like yellow, Mom!" Lily told her mother like she told her for the hundredth time.

"Right." Maura shook her head and poured two glasses of lemonade, the sugar-free, healthy kind Jane hated when she was little. But their daughters had been drinking it all their lives. They didn't know any better.

Jane smirked and stood up from her seat, rubbing Anna's back as the girl sat back down to continue reading her book, the second one of that week. She stopped behind her wife and wrapped her arms around Maura's waist to press her lips against her cheek. "Should we do something?" she whispered.

Maura sighed deeply, leaning back in Jane's front while she looked at their daughters. "I'm not sure."

"It hurts Anna, but… She's smarter than them. I'm pretty sure they'll stop when she continues to ignore them, right?"

Maura nodded, her fingers lacing with Jane's around her waist. "I hope so. Us interfering might make things worse."

"You think me kicking their ass won't solve everything?" Jane smirked and leaned down to kiss Maura's exposed neck under her ponytail.

Maura chuckled, slapping Jane's arm. "No, I don't think that will solve everything."

"Too bad." Jane tilted her head and hid her face into the crook of her wife's neck. "Maur…"

"Hm?"

"Do you ever think Anna's in the wrong class?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean…" Jane sighed and looked back up at the twelve-year-old, seeing that familiar frown on Anna's face as she was totally engrossed in the book. "She's the smartest in her class. She reads books on high school level, right?"

"Some, yes. Not all of them. She loves those awful Twilight books."

"Yeah but still," Jane chuckled.

"Are you talking about her skipping a grade?"

Jane shrugged. "I don't know. Should she? She's got so much more in her!"

Maura sighed deeply and nodded her head, resting her temple against Jane's cheek. "It passed my mind a couple of times as well."

"And…?"

"I don't know, Jane. Her teacher said she's doing just fine in school. She gets extra math assignments already and I'm able to provide her with the challenges she needs at home. As long as she's comfortable in her own skin… I'm not sure if we should change anything."

Jane knew Maura was right. It took a long time before Anna was comfortable in her class. It took even longer before she started making a few friends besides Morgan, who had been her best friend ever since she was four years old. To allow her to skip a grade would mean to pull her out of her comfort zone and make her start all over again. With Anna's shy nature and introverted personality, they were too afraid it would hold her back.

"All that matters is that she's happy," Maura whispered, her lips curling up into a loving smile as she stared at their oldest daughter. "I can't help but seeing a big future for her. She has the ability to go into medical school, become a scientist, a writer, a professor… I want nothing more for her than to go to college and get the most out of her intelligence."

"What if she wants to be a waitress for the rest of her life?"

Maura groaned softly. "That would be hard for me, I won't deny it. But if that makes her happy," Maura shrugged, "I'd be okay."

Jane smiled and gently turned her wife's head to capture her lips in a loving kiss. She smiled when she looked into the sparkling hazel eyes she loved so much. "You're the best mom."

Maura chuckled and shook her head, smiling a dreamy smile at her wife. "We just have the best kids."

Jane hummed and looked back at Anna, seeing Lily taking place next to her sister and trying to get her out of her book. "Anna's good the way she is, right?"

"Yes."

"Then we won't change anything and you just keep bothering her with boring books and I'll keep trying to get her to play baseball."

"God Jane, you know she hates sports."

"She liked it when we played soccer the other day!"

"She did, until you and Lily started wrestling over the ball." Maura shook her head and untangled herself from the taller brunette. "Then she lost interest and went back inside to come into my office and read her book." She smiled at her wife and cupped her face. "That's her place."

Jane nodded, smiling lovingly when she kissed Maura's lips again. "Thank God I still have Lily."

Maura huffed and slapped Jane's arm. "You're impossible."

"But you love me."

"Unfortunately, yes." Maura shook her head but she couldn't stop a smile from curling her lips while she put two glasses of lemonade on the table in front of her daughters. "Finish it, please," she told them, knowing very well that Lily would be distracted soon and Anna would be too caught up in her book.

Jane chuckled as she watched Lily downing the drink and squirming off her seat to busy herself with something else while Anna slowly drank her lemonade, her attention never leaving the book. Her two daughters couldn't be more different. They could fight and they were like day and night but secretly, it delighted Jane that Lily stood up for her sister today. No matter how different they were and no matter how much they fought, they loved each other. They were sisters and they loved each other like family.


	33. Chapter 33

_A/N Thank you for your kind reviews and messages! It means a lot of me, not one of them goes unnoticed. I appreciate you all sticking with me throughout this story that turns out to be a lot longer than I anticipated when I started. Let me know what you think!_

Chapter 33

"Maura, look." Morgan folded out a piece of paper on the kitchen counter, sliding it towards the blonde standing opposite her.

Maura furrowed her brow and took the letter from her thirteen-year-old surrogate daughter. "What's this?"

"Rachel's SAT score."

"Wow!" Maura looked up at Morgan as her eyes widened.

"That's really good, right?" Morgan asked insecurely.

"It's excellent!" Maura's smile fell when she saw the sad look on Morgan's face. "What's going on? How did you get your sister's SAT score?"

"Found it in the kitchen," Morgan replied, shrugging her shoulders.

"Honey," Maura put the paper back down and looked at the young girl in front of her. "Why are you showing me this?"

Morgan sighed deeply and tucked her short brown hair behind her ears. "I just wanted to ask… With this score, Rachel could get into a really good college, right?"

"Well, whether or not you get into a specific school isn't only depending on your SAT's… But she has a good chance with this score, yes." Maura furrowed her brow. "Is she applying to any schools?"

"No, that's the thing." Morgan averted her gaze and leaned against the kitchen counter. "She can get into a really good school but she doesn't want to apply 'cause Dad can't afford it."

"Has she looked into scholarships?"

Morgan shrugged. "I think so, yeah. But then it's still a lot of money left." She looked up at Maura and smiled apologetically. "For us, at least."

Maura tilted her head. "Would she let me help her?"

"She's not taking money from you," Morgan replied softly, "but I thought… Maybe you can find a way after all? Maybe something we haven't thought of?"

"Did she talk about it with your father?"

Morgan shook her head and looked down at her feet. "No. He's gonna want to get three more jobs just so he can afford college for Rachel and we don't want that."

Maura sighed deeply. Craig had a reasonable, steady job at a garage, fixing cars, but it didn't bring in a lot of money. Raising two girls by himself was a challenge. Maura and Jane had been there for them in every way possible, but they wouldn't take money from them. "I understand."

"Can you just… Can you look into it? For Rachel?"

Maura smiled and gently caressed the girl's cheek. "Of course."

Morgan sighed in relief and smiled gratefully. "Thank you."

Maura shook her head, chuckled and pulled the short girl into her arms for a sweet hug. "You're very kind for looking after your sister like this."

Morgan smiled, snuggling comfortably in Maura's arms. Both Rachel and Morgan loved their father and were happy with the things they were but Maura knew they missed a mother. They missed someone to talk about girl things with, they missed someone warm and loving to give them advice about boys and make-up and to snuggle. Maura gently brushed her hand through Morgan's hair and pulled her close, smiling when she felt the girl squeezing closer for a second longer. She loved these girls. Morgan had been in their lives for almost ten years and Rachel came with it, expanding their family with two surrogate daughters.

"You're all growing up way too fast," Maura said softly before kissing the top of Morgan's head.

Morgan giggled. "I'm the shortest in my class. I'm even shorter than Anna and she's twelve!"

"Well yes, you are quite short for your age. But you're already thirteen! And your sister is moving off to college soon…" Maura sighed deeply. "It's all going too fast."

"We don't know if Rachel's gonna go to college," Morgan said softly.

Maura smiled sadly, pulling the girl against her chest. She wanted to do anything in her power to make sure Rachel went to college, but she knew it wasn't her choice. The only thing she could do was help them to her best abilities. "Maybe not," Maura whispered, "but you're all my babies and my babies are all growing up."

"Good thing we are." Morgan chuckled and pulled back to look up at the blonde with a cheeky smile on her face. "Otherwise you'd be stuck with babies all your life!"

Maura laughed. "You're right, that would be horrible." She shook her head and smiled to herself while she took Morgan's coat and put it away where it belonged instead of thrown over a chair. A part of her would love it if there would still be a baby around the house. She loved those times in their lives and sometimes she felt sorry they only experienced it once. But she also knew how amazing it was to see her children grow up into the beautiful people they were going to be.

"Anna's taking a long time," Morgan said while she sat on one of the chairs at the kitchen counter, grabbing a book from her backpack.

"You know how she is." Maura chuckled. Anna was at the library. She only went after school to return some books but Maura knew she would come back with a pile of new ones to read.

Morgan hummed and nodded while she opened her book to get started on the homework she was supposed to do together with Anna. "Maura?"

"Hm?"

"Can you help me? I'm stuck here."

"Math?"

"No, physics."

"Oh I love physics!" Maura clapped her hands and stood behind Morgan to read the book she was working with.

Morgan rolled her eyes. "Physics sucks."

"Hey, watch your language." Maura glared at the girl and looked at the part where she got stuck. "What do you have so far?"

Morgan sighed. "Not much. I'm terrible at this."

"Oh I'm sure that's not true. Let me see." Maura wrapped her arm around Morgan's shoulders and moved her notebook to look at what she wrote. She studied the assignment for a short while before noticing where the girl went wrong. "Right here." She smiled and explained in detail how Morgan should solve the problem. Just when they reached the right answer, the front door opened and Anna walked in, carrying a heavy backpack that was undoubtedly filled with books.

"Hi, honey." Maura smiled at the beautiful girl that was wearing a blue dress, which made her look stunning.

"Hi." Anna smiled at her mother and shrugged off her light jacket, shivering slightly.

"I told you it might get too cold for that outfit," Maura chuckled and opened her arms for her oldest daughter to pull her into a hug to greet her.

Anna nodded her head, dropped her bag and wrapped her own arms around her mother's waist. She had been greeting them like this ever since they adopted her and Maura hoped it would never change. She kissed the top of Anna's head. "How was your day?" she whispered.

Anna shrugged. "Fine."

"Any trouble with the other kids?" Maura asked quietly while brushed the girl's hair over her shoulder, referring to the children that were making fun of Anna.

"Just a little when I went to the library."

"Hm." Maura pressed her lips against Anna's temple and pulled her close.

"But I got really good books." Anna pulled back and looked at her mother with a happy sparkle in her eyes. "Look." She untangled herself and pulled a book out of her backpack, showing it proudly. "I finally found the third part!"

Maura chuckled. "Finally." She gently took the book from her daughter. "Start it after your homework, please. Morgan's been waiting."

"Right."

"Did you kick their butts?" Morgan asked, referring to the kids that made fun of her on the way to the library.

Anna giggled and shook her head while she pulled her homework out of her backpack. "It was just Jason and his friends again. No big deal."

"It is a big deal! You can't let 'em walk over you like that, Ann." Morgan furrowed her brow as she looked at her friend.

"It's not my problem, is it? If they want to be jerks, it's their problem. I don't care anymore."

"I do," Morgan mumbled before taking a sip of the drink that Maura put down in front of her.

Maura smiled. Anna was being very smart and adult in all of this. It hurt her and Maura knew it affected her more than she showed, but she admired the girl's attitude. She watched the girls working on their physics homework for a while before sitting back at her laptop to continue her work. She had been working less hours at the office for years now and it worked out well that she was able to spend more time with the children, but sometimes it was difficult to stay focused with a busy family like hers. She told herself to stay in the kitchen until Lily got home and then move to her office to really get into the reports she needed to finish.

After a few moments of silence, the front door opened and their youngest daughter walked in, wearing a stained pair of jeans, a white sweater and her jacket hanging loose over her shoulders as she dragged her bag over the floor. Maura furrowed her brow. "You look like you're in a bad mood," she said as she turned in her seat, opening her arms for her daughter.

Lily groaned and dropped her bag to let herself fall into her mother's arms, resting her head on Maura's shoulder. "Mr. Michaels was being such a jerk!"

"Oh baby, don't talk about your teacher like that. What happened?"

"I didn't do anything and I had to go in front of the class to 'show my work'!" She emphasized the last part with a groan. "I just told Lucas to keep his stinking feet to himself!"

"Hm." Maura kissed the side of Lily's head and brushed her messy curls out of her face. "Did you use nice words?"

Lily huffed. "Maybe."

Maura couldn't help a smile from curling her lips and pulled her little girl closer against her. "Did Lucas kick you again?"

"Yeah! All the time."

"I thought we discussed this, baby," Maura said softly, her hand rubbing up and down Lily's back. "You know, about telling your teacher?"

Lily sighed and nodded her head. She didn't like asking for help. She wanted to solve things herself. "I know," she mumbled against her mother. "I'll tell next time."

"Good girl." Maura kissed the side of Lily's head and squeezed her close in her arms, tightening the embrace.

"I also scratched my elbow," Lily said after a short moment of silence. She rolled up the sleeve of her sweater and pulled back to show her elbow to her mother.

"God, you can't make it one day without injuring yourself!" Maura took Lily's arm and inspected the scrape, quickly determining that it was nothing bad. "Does it hurt?"

Lily shook her head. "Not anymore."

"Good." Maura smiled and carefully placed a kiss on her daughter's elbow. "There. All better?"

Lily chuckled, leaning back into her mother's arms. "Yeah sure."

"I have cookies," Maura said softly while she wrapped her arms back around her youngest daughter.

"Oatmeal again?" Lily wrinkled her nose.

"Yes, but I put chocolate chips in them this time."

"Really?" Lily's eyes widened and she pulled back from her mother's chest to look at her.

Maura nodded. She didn't tell Lily that she only used sugar-free dark chocolate, knowing how much she was like Jane when it came to food. "Yes, really." She squeezed her daughter in her arms before letting her go to pour her something to drink and get her a homemade cookie.

Before she finished, Jane walked into the house, having finished her shift for that day. Maura smiled at her beautiful wife. "Hi, love."

"Hi." Jane smirked and made her way around the room, kissing the top of Morgan's head, Anna's cheek and pulling Lily in for a quick hug. She walked towards her wife and cupped her face to press her lips against her lips, humming softly when she kissed her. They silently stumbled back towards the hallway out of sight of the girls, never breaking apart.

Maura felt familiar butterflies in her stomach and wrapped her arms around the brunette's neck, a part of her wondering what she did to deserve a greeting like this while the rest of her simply enjoyed the kiss that deepened pretty quickly. When she pulled away, she gasped for air and tangled her fingers in her wife's dark curls. "What was that for?" she whispered against Jane's lips.

"I missed you," Jane smirked and her cheeks blushed slightly while she nuzzled her nose into the crook of the blonde's neck.

Maura smiled lovingly and wrapped her arms around her snuggly detective, feeling her heart swelling with love. They had been married for over a decade now but their love was just as fresh and fierce as they day they fell in love. They had their disagreements and periods of time where that passionate love seemed to disappear for a while, but they always found it back. Maura looked deeply into her wife's dark eyes, getting lost in those deep, sparkling eyes she loved so much. Jane smiled and her eyes wrinkled around the edges, the sparkle in them increasing.

"You look beautiful today," Maura whispered, resting her forehead against the detective's. "I missed you too."

Jane hummed and pulled her wife impossibly closer. "I know I've been working too much."

Maura sighed deeply and closed her eyes. "You have been gone a lot lately, yes," she whispered. "But I know the team needed you."

"Home needs me too."

Maura smiled slightly. "The girls have missed you."

"I missed two bedtimes."

"Three for Lily. Two for Anna, but I'm quite sure she's old enough to not feel so bad about that anymore."

"I'm going to catch up. Promise."

"Don't promise me," Maura whispered before lightly kissing her wife's lips. "Promise Lily."

"I'm gonna catch up on bedtime with you too." Jane smirked and put her face back into the crook of Maura's neck again, placing soft kisses on her skin.

Maura chuckled and tilted her head to give her wife better access. "Hm, please do." She rubbed her hands up and down Jane's back and moaned when she felt her tongue on the skin of her neck. "God, Jane," she whimpered. "Stop it."

"Hm?"

Maura slapped her arm and giggled softly. "You're arousing me. Stop it."

"You don't like?" Jane mumbled while she continued her kisses.

"I do, but our family is waiting in the living room and I desperately need to get back to work."

Jane nodded her head and reluctantly pulled back. "Right."

Maura smirked. "Let's put the girls to bed early tonight, hm?"

"Good idea." She pecked her wife's lips and wrapped her arms loosely around her waist. "Anything special happen while I was gone?"

Maura shook her head but stopped when she thought about how Morgan came by a while ago. "Oh yes. Rachel got her SAT score."

"And?" 

"She did excellent." Maura smiled proudly.

"But…?"

Maura sighed deeply and turned to look at the girls in the kitchen. "Morgan came to show it to me. She asked me to look into possibilities to get Rachel into college."

"Because Craig can't afford it," Jane added softly.

"Right. So I thought I'd look into the BPD scholarship and perhaps the Isles Foundation can offer something."

"They're not just taking money, Maur," Jane whispered quietly, knowing how important it was for Craig to be able to take care of his family by himself.

"A scholarship might be different." Maura stared at Morgan and Anna at the kitchen counter, thinking about Morgan's sister that was growing up so quickly. Rachel was so smart and talented. She was so sweet, caring and gentle. She deserved a future in college. "I have to try, Jane. That girl deserves the world."

"I know." Jane smiled as she kissed her wife's lips. "You're amazing."

"I'll be even more amazing when I help Rachel into college." Maura pulled back and smiled at the tall brunette.

"Yeah, you're only okay now." Jane chuckled and walked back into the kitchen.

Maura playfully slapped her arm. "Lily needs to get started on her homework, she's been putting it off for two days now."

"I'm on it." Jane took off her jacket and hung it over a chair. "Lils! Homework, baby. C'mon."

"Noooo!"

"Yeeeaaah!" Jane smirked and hooked her arms under Lily's, her muscles straining when she lifted the girl into the air, eliciting sweet giggles. "What do we have on our to do list, hm? Math?"

"Yeah, stupid math!"

"Okay then, let's get started on that stupid math." Jane put her daughter down on a chair at the dinner table and grabbed her backpack.

Maura chuckled at the sight and kissed the top of Lily's head as she passed her to grab her laptop and the reports on the table to move to her office. "I'll be in my office," she said, carrying the supplies under her arm. "Let me know if you need help, girls."

"We're good," Morgan said while she bit on the back of her pencil.

She walked out of the room but turned around before opening the door to her office. "Jane."

"Hm?"

"I love you." She smiled lovingly when she saw her wife's lips curling up into a sweet smile.

"I love you too, Maur."


	34. Chapter 34

Chapter 34

"Mama?"

"Hm?" Jane looked at her oldest daughter that was sitting next to her on a rock by a lake while Maura and Lily were looking at the birds, the little family enjoying the last moments of a lovely spring.

"Do you think my mother fought back?"

"What do you mean?" Jane furrowed her brow and saw Anna looking up at her with those sparkling grey eyes.

"I mean…" Anna sighed and fumbled with her pink jacket. "Do you think she fought the people that… That did that to her?"

Jane took a deep breath and gently wrapped her arm around Anna's shoulders. Twelve years old was too young to know about rape and human trafficking. Anna should be carefree and cheerful, but she was thinking about too many awful things. "If she was anything like you," Jane replied softly, "I'm sure she did anything in her power to get away."

"I'm not brave like you, Ma," Anna said quietly. "I just… I just wonder what happened, y'know?"

Jane nodded her head. "I know. Your mother was a very brave woman."

"How do you know?"

Jane shrugged and pulled her daughter into her side while she looked at her wife and youngest daughter. "Because she decided to keep you," Jane whispered, kissing the top of Anna's head. "That's a brave decision."

"She died, Ma."

"Yeah but I mean the pregnancy. She didn't decide to end the pregnancy like probably most women would in her situation. She kept you and brought the most beautiful, smart, amazing girl into the world."

A sudden sniffle pulled Jane out of her thoughts and she snapped her attention towards Anna, seeing quiet tears trickling down her pale cheeks. "Baby…"

"She kept me but she died. She must've known she couldn't afford medical care! She knew she wasn't healthy…" Anna's breath hitched in her throat and she wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand. "She didn't only make the decision to keep me, Ma." She looked up at her mother with pain in her eyes. "She made the decision to die, so I could live."

Tears burned in Jane's eyes as she listened to her daughter speaking those words that were too mature for a girl her age. She didn't know how to reply and took a deep breath. "The ultimate sacrifice," she whispered while she brushed Anna's blond hair out of her face, watching her staring into the distance with a pained expression. "You feel guilty, don't you?"

Anna looked at Jane, her brow furrowed in thought. "Maybe, I don't know. I just feel bad."

Jane hummed and wrapped both her arms around her little girl that was growing up too fast, feeling Anna's head resting on her chest. "Your mother was a remarkable woman, Anna," she whispered. "And I'm grateful for her."

Anna furrowed her brow. "Why?"

"Because if it wasn't for her, you wouldn't be in our lives. And you made our live a million times better."

Anna smiled and snuggled back into her mother's chest as Jane's hand brushed up and down her back. "I guess you made my life a million times better too," she replied softly. "You got me from an adoption center, right?"

"Yeah. You were three years old and so adorable." Jane smirked and combed her fingers through Anna's blond hair, thinking about the first time they met the shy, introverted little girl. "You had it good there, peanut. Remember Ahmed?"

"Yeah." Anna smiled. "He was nice."

"And he took really good care of you."

"But wait, I was with another family before you, right?"

Jane sighed. "Yeah. They took you in after you were born, but they broke up and gave you up again."

Anna furrowed her brow. "Would you and Mom give me up if you ever broke up?"

"Okay, first of all," Jane cupped Anna's chin and lifted her head to look into her eyes. "Mom and I are not breaking up. And second of all," she smiled and caressed her cheek, "do you really think we could live without you?"

Anna chuckled shyly and pulled herself free from Jane's grasp to hide herself back into her arms. "Guess not." 

"That's right." Jane smiled and kissed the side of Anna's head. "We're never giving you up, honey. You're ours forever."

They stayed silent for a short while until Anna sighed and stirred in Jane's arms. "I guess the universe wanted it to be like this," she said absentmindedly, staring at Maura who was kneeling next to Lily to explain her something about flowers. "Y'know, my mother died and then the universe made sure I went to a good family and got everything I needed. Or maybe God did. I don't know. Something took really good care of me, don't you think?" 

Jane swallowed her tears and pulled her daughter impossibly closer. "Yeah, peanut. I think so too."

"You just got stuck with me because of it." Anna chuckled to herself but Jane's smile fell and she sighed deeply. Anna often said these seemingly small things that involuntarily showed her insecurity and doubts. Jane knew there were more of those than Anna showed.

"The universe took really good care of us too, Anna," Jane said quietly, looking at her wife and youngest daughter with a smile on her face. "You know, Mom and I tried really hard to get pregnant. It failed many times and I've never seen your Mom so sad."

Anna furrowed her brow and pulled back to look at her mother.

"It was Thanksgiving and the treatment failed again. I found her upstairs in our bedroom, crying. We wanted to be mothers so badly," Jane sighed and tucked a strand of hair behind Anna's ear. "We just wanted to have a child. It didn't matter how. I didn't want to adopt at first, 'cause I never wanted our adopted kid to feel inferior because we couldn't have babies on our own but boy, was I wrong." Jane chuckled to herself. "We looked into adoption and we found you. As soon as I looked at your picture, I knew you were the one to make us parents. And Anna," Jane cupped her daughter's cheek and looked at her with a loving smile, "you turned our lives upside down."

Anna looked at her mother with wide eyes and a hint of disbelief.

"I never knew what it was like to be a mom," Jane continued quietly. "I never knew it was possible to feel so much love for another human being. I loved your Mom with all my heart but that feeling of wanting to protect your child with your life, wanting to make sure they are happy and cared for, for the rest of their lives… That's something else. So yeah…" Jane sighed deeply and pulled Anna back to her chest. "The universe did good. It's not fair what happened to your mother and it's not fair that that family gave you up like that when you were just a baby. But in the end… It brought you to us. And I'm forever grateful for that."

"Mama…" Anna had tears in her eyes when she looked into her mother's shimmering brown eyes.

Jane laughed at her own emotion and pressed her lips against Anna's forehead, pulling her close.

"What's going on here?" Maura asked, holding Lily's hand as they both walked up to the two of them.

"Look, Mama!" Lily showed a flower to her mother, the one she had picked next to the water. "I'm taking it home."

"Oh, pretty." Jane smiled and untangled herself from Anna, watching Maura sitting behind Anna and pulling the girl in between her legs as she wrapped her arms around her stomach.

"Are you okay?" she whispered.

Anna nodded her head and leaned back against her mother. "Yeah."

"Lils, did Mom show you how to bounce a rock on the water?"

Lily's eyes went wide and she furiously shook her head. "No!"

"Oh Mom, you should know better!" Jane winked at her wife, kissed her lips and took Lily's hand to walk back to the water, searching the ground for the right sized rock.

"Mama, we should go camping!" Lily looked at her mother with wide eyes, surprising herself by her own amazing idea. "Can we go camping?"

Jane chuckled. "I don't think Mom wants to go camping, baby."

"Why not?"

"She's not the camping type. Trust me, I know." She smirked, thinking back to the one time she took her wife camping. It was a few months before they got married and Jane thought it would be fun and romantic, but Maura wasn't cut out for camping. Her designer shoes got ruined, her hair got frizzy and she kept going on and on about scientific nature facts. They ended up having a fight on that trip. Jane sighed and grabbed a rock from the ground. She smiled slightly when she remembered how she angrily packed the tent and saw Maura looking at her with tears in her eyes. That was all she needed to forgive her. They made sweet love in their halfway broken tent and collectively decided to never go camping again.

"But you and I can go camping," Lily said, watching Jane throw the rock on the water and failing to bounce it. "Then Mom and Anna can go camping at the library or something."

Jane chuckled and shook her head. "We'll see about that, okay? Mom and Anna love more than just books."

"Yeah, more books."

"Hey." Jane furrowed her brow and looked sternly at her youngest daughter. "Be nice, please."

"Sorry." Lily took a rock from her mother and tried to bounce it on the water but failing miserably.

Jane smiled and continued helping her youngest daughter until she managed it once, eliciting a sweet and exciting squeal from the eight-year-old. The entire afternoon was filled with bliss and love. Maura and Anna sat on the rock talking for a long time while Jane and Lily played by the water until Lily got tired.

The small family grabbed a take-out dinner on their way home and settled on the couch in front of the television, watching one of Lily's favorite movies while they ate. Lily sat comfortably against Maura's side, her skinny legs tucked under herself as her head rested against Maura's upper arm. Anna sat in between them, slowly chewing on her chicken as she stared absentmindedly at the TV. Jane worried about her. Anna was so often lost in thought and she had too many concern for a girl her age.

She slowly wrapped her arm around Anna's shoulders and pressed a kiss on top of her head. Anna looked up, expecting her to say something but Jane just smiled and caressed her daughter's cheek.

Anna smiled back and snuggled into her mother's side as she nibbled on a chicken bone. "Can you hand me my book, Ma?" She reached out her hand towards the armrest of the couch.

Jane smirked and handed her daughter the book, seeing her snuggling comfortably against the couch has she opened it, ready to get lost in the worlds she loved so much. As long as she was able to do that, Jane knew she would be okay. She had to be able to get away from the sorrows and get lost in her stories. That's how she coped. "Is it a good one?" Jane whispered, resting her cheek on top of Anna's head.

"Hm?"

Jane chuckled. "I guess it is then."

"What?" Anna furrowed her brow and looked up at her mother.

"I asked if it's a good book." Jane laughed and brushed Anna's hair behind her ear. "My little bookworm."

"It is a good book." Anna nodded and turned her attention back to her book, snuggling even closer into her mother's side.

Maura looked over at her wife and smiled at her, Lily's curls splayed out on her chest as she stared at the television. She reached over and gently took Jane's hand in hers, squeezing it as she winked. "I love you," she whispered as she brushed her fingers through Lily's curls on her chest.

Jane smiled while she silently made fun of their idyllic family moment. The tough, badass detective Rizzoli had to step aside when it was time to snuggle up on the couch with her family. She wasn't even ashamed of it anymore. Her family was her life, her daughters were the most important part of her life, Maura the love of her life that only made everything better. Things were good.


	35. Chapter 35

Chapter 35

Maura walked into the small, messy house that belonged to Rachel and Morgan and their father, stepping over a pile of laundry to walk into the kitchen. The house was clean, but it was very clear that Craig worked terribly long hours and didn't have time to catch up on things like laundry and doing dishes.

Rachel smiled apologetically. "Sorry about the mess."

Maura shook her head. "That's okay. Where are Anna and Morgan?"

"In our room, doing homework or something." Rachel stopped into the kitchen and took a sip of her tea. "You want something to drink?"

"No thank you." Maura smiled and opened her purse, taking out a piece of paper. "I came by early to give you this."

"What's that?"

"Open it." Maura clapped her hands together and waited in anticipation for Rachel to read the letter.

Much to Maura's surprise, thick tears filled Rachel's eyes. "M-Maura…"

"I-…" 

"W-who's Barry Frost?" 

Maura sighed deeply. "He was a friend. Jane's partner."

"The Barry Frost Memorial scholarship?"

"It's a scholarship facilitated by BPD." Maura smiled and stepped closer towards the teenager. "You deserve it, honey. I'm so proud of you for getting accepted."

"I don't know what to say…" Rachel looked at Maura as tears trickled down her cheeks.

"Well I expected you to be happier," Maura chuckled and reached out to wipe Rachel's tears with the back of her hand.

"I am! I am, God, this is amazing. I-… Thank you, Maura." Rachel looked into her eyes but fresh tears started streaming down her face. "I'm sorry." She turned around and her shoulders shook as she wiped her cheeks.

"Hey…" Maura placed her hand on Rachel's back. "What's going on?"

Rachel lowered her head and fumbled with the letter in her hands. "I'm going to college."

"You are."

"I have to move out… And… And live on my own… And-…"

"Oh honey." Maura chuckled and turned Rachel around to wrap her arms around the girl that was now a few inches taller than her. "You're growing up!"

Rachel laughed through her tears and gratefully buried herself in the embrace. "I don't even know how to do my laundry."

Maura looked at the amount of laundry that was splayed across the house and chuckled. It looked like no one really knew how to do the laundry around here. "I'll teach you everything you need to know." She pulled back and cupped Rachel's cheek, looking into her eyes. "Honey, you're going to college. You can be anything you want to be."

"I'm going to college." Rachel let out a laugh and shook her head. "And I'm freaking crying about it!"

Maura chuckled. "It's overwhelming."

Rachel nodded and wrapped her arms around Maura's neck, squeezing her close. "I can never thank you for this, Maura," she whispered.

"Just make sure you work hard and do the best you can," Maura replied quietly, tears burning in her eyes at the thought of her surrogate daughter growing up so quickly. "And promise me you'll visit. Every chance you get. Once a week."

"Once a week?" Rachel chuckled. "It's a six-hour drive!"

Maura swallowed hard and pulled the girl closer in her arms. "Six hours…"

"Yeah, maybe five without traffic."

Maura sighed and closed her eyes. "I don't know if I'm ready for my little girl to be six hours away…"

"You just got me into college! You should've thought about that before, Maura." Rachel chuckled and carefully pulled away from the hug. "I'm not a little girl."

"I know." Maura shook her head, looking at the teenager that had been growing into a woman too quickly. She was pretty. She had beautiful curves and her hair was long and straight. Maura remembered how she met Rachel when she was only twelve years old, how shy and afraid she was. Rachel was growing up beautifully. "And I know you're technically not my little girl but I grew quite fond of you, Rachel. And I'm allowed to get a little choked up on the idea of you moving out of the house and starting your own life."

Rachel smiled slightly and leaned her hip against the kitchen counter while she looked at Maura. "You're so sentimental."

"You were the one that spontaneously started crying when I handed you this!"

Rachel blushed and looked down at her feet. "Yeah, let's not tell my dad about that, okay?"

Maura laughed and stepped forward to pull Rachel's head down and kiss her forehead. "Of course."

When she stepped back, Rachel lifted her head and looked at the blonde. "Seriously, Maura. Thank you."

"You're welcome." Maura smiled lovingly as she saw the gratefulness in the teenager's eyes.

"I'm gonna figure out a way to thank you," Rachel said, pointing at Maura while she filled the kettle again to make herself more tea. "Just wait. I'm gonna figure out something good."

"I can't wait." Maura laughed and shook her head. "Would you mind getting Anna for me? We need to get going, I don't want Lily to be home alone."

Rachel nodded. "On it. ANNA! YOUR MOM'S HERE!"

"Coming!"

Maura sighed. She didn't allow yelling in her house.

"Hi, Mom." Anna smiled at her mother, adjusted her backpack on her shoulder and wrapped her arms around Maura's waist.

"Hi, baby." She kissed the top of Anna's head while she pulled her close. When she pulled back, she saw a look of utter exhaustion on her daughter's face. "You look tired," she whispered.

Anna just nodded and leaned into Maura's side. Maura furrowed her brow but decided to let it go for now. "We should get going, Lily's waiting at home."

"Are you and Mama both free tonight?" Anna asked with curiosity in her eyes.

"I have a lot of paperwork to do but I'll be in my home office." Maura brushed Anna's hair back and turned her attention towards Rachel and Morgan. "Please say hi to your father."

"Will do." Rachel nodded and handed Maura her purse. "Thank you again. Seriously."

"You're welcome again." Maura chuckled and waited for Anna and Morgan to say their goodbyes for leaving the small house to head home.

Back home, Jane was already cooking dinner with Lily, the kitchen looking like a murder scene as the ingredients for homemade pizza splayed out on the counter and some of it on the floor. "I hope you're planning on cleaning this up," Maura said with a smile while she kissed her wife's lips. "Hi, my love." 

"Hi." Jane smirked and kissed her again. "Did you tell Rachel?"

"I did." Maura smiled sweetly. "She was so happy."

"Good. She deserves it." Jane looked at the messy kitchen and smiled apologetically. "Lily promised she'll clean everything up by herself."

"Did not!" Lily gasped.

"Just kidding." Jane chuckled and ruffled her hand through Lily's messy curls.

"Hi, pretty girl," Maura greeted her youngest daughter and cupped her face to kiss her forehead. "How was school today?"

"Boring."

"Of course." Maura chuckled and pulled her little girl into her side for a short moment until she squirmed away. "I love you."

"Love you too, Mommy." Lily picked a piece of pineapple with her fingers and put it in her mouth.

"Hey, quit eating all the pizza toppings!" Jane playfully slapped Lily's arm. "Leave something for dinner, please."

"Lily," Anna walked into the kitchen, looking at the pizza toppings on the counter, "are you making one without mushrooms for me?"

"Yep." Lily pointed at a halfway done pizza on the right. "Right there. With pineapple 'cause you love pineapple." 

Anna smiled. "Thanks."

Jane studied her oldest daughter and furrowed her brow, seeing the same exhaustion Maura saw. "You feeling okay, peanut?"

Anna shrugged her shoulders and allowed her mother to kiss the top of her head. "Just tired."

Maura hummed and placed her hand on Anna's forehead to determine her temperature. "No fever."

"I'm not sick."

"You look quite pale and very tired," Maura cupped Anna's chin and looked into her eyes, examining her expression to determine if there was something off about her health. "Did you eat normally today? Does your stomach hurt? Headache? Cold, warm?"

"Mom." Anna rolled her eyes and sighed deeply. "I'm okay, I'm just tired."

"Were the kids mean again?"

"Mom! I'm fine!"

Maura, startled by Anna's reaction, pulled back and nodded her head. "Okay then."

"Sorry." Anna looked down at her feet, looking guilty.

Maura just shook her head and pulled out a stool at the kitchen counter, lifting Anna up and into her lap. "Come here," she whispered quietly.

"Jeez," Anna groaned and rolled her eyes again, but she rested her head on Maura's chest and curled her skinny body up to fit in her mother's arms.

But Anna wasn't fine. That night, she woke up vomiting and with a fever. One night later, Lily came down with the same thing and to make it all worse, Maura felt a disturbing stomach ache announcing itself while she held Lily's hair back as the girl vomited into the toilet.

"Shh, deep breaths, honey," Maura said softly while she rubbed Lily's back, the girl's dark curls sticking to her sweaty forehead.

When Lily's stomach was empty, she slumped down on the floor against her mother, crying softly.

"I know, baby." Maura brushed Lily's dark curls out of her face and pressed her lips against her forehead, feeling a slight raise in temperature. Maura sighed and gently moved Lily out of her arms to fill a cup of water and hand it to her youngest daughter. "Don't swallow it," she said quietly. "Just rinse the taste out of your mouth."

Lily nodded, swirled the water in her mouth and spit it back in the sink. "Gross."

Maura took a deep breath, feeling a wave of nausea flushing over her. "C'mon baby, let's get you back in bed."

Lily allowed her mother to lead her back to her mothers' bed and snuggled back under the covers. Maura leaned down to kiss her daughter's cheek but the movement set off something in her stomach and she hurried towards the bathroom, kneeling in front of the toilet bowl. Her stomach turned and her entire dinner disappeared into the toilet, her entire stomach cramping painfully.

"Mommy?"

Maura just groaned and felt her body collapsing for another round of vomiting. She rested her head on her arm and closed her eyes until she felt a warm hand on her back. "Maura…"

"Sorry," Maura whispered, lifting her head to look at Jane behind her.

"The Rizzoli-flu got you too, huh?"

Maura nodded. "I guess it did."

Jane hummed softly and helped Maura up, supporting her out of the bedroom. She gently sat her down on the bed and unzipped her skirt, lifting her wife to take it off. She moved the blankets and gently pushed her to lie down next to Lily that was looking at them with her brow furrowed in concern.

"Is Mommy sick now too?" Lily asked, her voice hoarse and weak.

"Yeah, baby." Jane tucked her wife in and leaned forward to press her lips against her forehead. "You feel warm, babe."

Maura hummed. She closed her eyes, feeling her head pounding behind her eyes, her heart racing.

"Get some rest," Jane whispered, gently caressing Maura's cheek.

"How's Anna?"

Jane sighed. "Not great. But just let me worry about the girls, alright? You just worry about getting better."

Maura smiled slightly at her wife's gentleness and care before getting comfortable under the blankets. She felt Jane standing up from the bed to check on Anna.

"Sorry for making you sick, Mommy," Lily said softly while she carefully moved towards her mother.

"Oh, it's not your fault," Maura whispered, gently wrapping her arms around her little girl.

Lily snuggled closely into her mother, her feverish body wiggling to get comfortable.

"Please stay still, honey," Maura said softly while she slowly rubbed Lily's back.

"Sorry."

Maura closed her eyes, pulling her daughter close while she fought the turning of her stomach. She felt a delicious state of unconsciousness overcoming her body and allowed herself to slip into the nice darkness of sleep.

When she woke up, she felt two small feverish bodies on each side of her and heard the TV playing softly in the back of her mind. She opened her eyes and smiled. Lily was still resting on her chest, her head turned to look at the movie that was playing on the television on the wall. Anna was slightly sitting up against the headboard but her head had fallen to the side and her eyes were watery and drooping. The Rizzoli family was struck down hard by this flu.

Maura's head was still hurting like hell, but her stomach felt slightly better now that it was empty. She closed her eyes and sighed until she heard Lily's soft voice breaking the silence.

"Anna?"

"Hm?"

"Do you think we made Mommy sick?"

"I don't know. We could have."

"I gave Mommy a kiss yesterday. You think that made her sick?" Lily's voice was laced with concern and Maura smiled to herself at her daughter's genuine care.

"I don't know, Lil," Anna said reassuringly. "We're both sick, it's easy for Mommy or Mama to get sick too."

"You think we made Mama sick too?"

Anna shook her head. "Mama's fine. Don't worry."

Lily sighed in relief and Maura felt the little girl relaxing back against her. "I feel bad for making Mommy sick," she said quietly.

"It's not our fault, Lily." Anna's voice was calm, always reasonable and sweet. "It's just a stupid flu. Mommy's gonna get better."

Maura felt her heart swelling with love and fought to keep her eyes close and listen to the conversation between her daughters. She was touched by how caring Anna spoke to her younger sister and she loved how Lily believed every word Anna said and took comfort in them.

"My head hurts," Lily whispered softly.

Anna sighed and Maura felt the girl snuggling closer against her. "Yeah. Mine too."

"I hate sick. Stupid sick."

Maura chuckled, effectively giving away that she was awake. She moved herself to sit up a little, stirring Lily in the process who groaned softly.

"Sorry, baby," Maura moved Lily back on her chest, tangling her hand in her messy curls while she used her other arm to wrap around Anna's shoulders, secretly enjoying her girls next to her like this. "How are you feeling?" she whispered before kissing the top of Anna's head.

Anna shrugged. "My head hurts."

"Did you vomit again?"

"No, not since this morning."

"Good. Lily?"

"One more time, after you."

Maura sighed and pulled Lily closer. She hadn't kept anything in her stomach for over fifteen hours now. "Baby."

Lily wrapped her short arm around Maura's stomach and snuggled impossibly closer. Even when she was sick, she was just like Jane. Affectionate, cuddly and eager to get better. Maura hated seeing her children sick but she loved this part. Anna was different. It looked like she felt worse but she stayed in the background, always humble and quiet. Maura rested her cheek on top of Anna's head and took a deep breath to fight a wave of nausea. It didn't help. She felt her stomach turning and jumped off the bed, reaching the toilet just in time.

Her world was spinning and she clung to the toilet bowl, hearing one of the girls calling 'Mama!' in the back of her mind but she barely heard it. She closed her eyes and waited until the pain in her stomach subsided.

When she got back up, Jane was standing behind her, ready to catch her. She stood up on weak legs and hid herself in her wife's strong arms, nuzzling her face into the crook of her neck.

Jane sighed and pulled her wife closer. "You got it bad, huh?"

"Not worse than the girls," Maura answered, her voice hoarse and weak.

"Hm." Jane kissed the side of her head. "Let's get you back into bed. Can I get you anything?"

Maura shook her head. "No." She took a step but her legs were too weak. She immediately felt Jane's arm wrapping around her waist to hold her up and lead her back into bed. She crawled back in between her girls, lying on her back. Her eyes closed but she snapped them open when she heard Anna whimpering next to he and hurrying off the bed to do the same thing her mother just did.

Jane spoke quiet words of comfort until Anna finished. The girl cried softly in Jane's arms and Jane made her rinse her mouth and lifted her in her arms to put her back to bed. Maura smiled sadly. Anna's legs wrapped around her mother's waist and her blond hair stuck to her forehead as she rested against her mother.

"Come here," Maura whispered, opening her arms for her oldest daughter.

Jane gently put the young girl next to Maura and Anna immediately curled up into her side where she cried softly. "My stomach hurts so bad, Mommy," she whispered through her tears.

Maura's own tears slowly trickled down her cheeks. "I know, sweetheart."

"Maur, can she have anything for that?"

Maura sighed. "It'll come right back up again."

Jane furrowed her brow in concern and simply lay down in the bed next to Anna, wrapping the girl up in her arms while Maura wrapped her arms around her youngest daughter. If this was a regular flu, they would all be better within a few days. But those few days would be long and difficult to get through.


	36. Chapter 36

Chapter 36

"Maur," Jane put her hand on Maura's sweaty back to comfort her as she sat on the edge of the bed, her head resting in her hands. She offered her wife a glass of water because she just emptied her stomach again after eating only half a bowl of chicken soup.

Maura took the glass with shaking hands and took a sip, rinsing the taste out of her mouth before spitting it back into the bucket she vomited in. Jane took the glass back and put it on the nightstand. She brushed Maura's hair out of her face and pressed her lips against her warm forehead. "My beautiful smartypants," she whispered with a smirk, "struck down in the prime of life."

Maura smiled the smallest, most adorable smile, looking up at her wife with shimmering eyes. Jane's heart melted for the beautiful woman in front of her and she carefully wrapped her arms around her, wanting to be as close as possible to the woman she loved so much. She hated to see her wife and children sick. She was grateful she was still healthy herself but the whole situation was horrible. Anna was keeping her food down now, but her fever came back before she went to bed. Lily seemed to be getting better that morning but she was developing a pretty painful ear infection. Maura was still vomiting every few hours and the fever was wearing her out.

"God I feel awful," Maura whispered into her wife's chest.

"I know babe," Jane sighed deeply and carefully pulled her closer. "You should try to get some sleep."

Maura nodded weakly and untangled herself, careful not to move too much and upset her stomach again. Jane guided her wife down and hovered over her to press her lips against her cheek, trailing her kisses up to her forehead. "Sleep, Maur," she whispered. "You'll feel better tomorrow."

"Hm." Maura's eyes closed and Jane saw her slowly relaxing. "Could you check on the girls?" she asked softly.

"I was just about to." Jane kissed her wife again and stood up from the bed to check on her oldest daughter. Anna had a fever before she went to bed that night and Jane knew she wouldn't be sleeping well. She carefully opened the bedroom door and saw Anna opening her eyes in the dark. She sighed. "You're not sleeping?"

Anna sighed and shook her head. "I had a bad dream."

Jane hummed and walked around the bed, lifting the blankets to slide in behind her daughter. She turned Anna on her back and gently rubbed her stomach. "Wanna talk about it?"

"No."

"You sure?"

Anna nodded and turned on her side to snuggle into her mother's chest. Jane pressed her lips against the girl's forehead, feeling her feverish warmth. "How are you feeling?"

"The same. Tired, mostly."

"Anything I can do?"

The young teenager shook her head and moved closer against her mother. Jane knew what she could do. Stay. She pulled Anna close and waited until the girl drifted off to sleep. When she was absolutely sure she was down for the night, she carefully untangled herself and headed towards Lily's room to go check on her.

She opened the next bedroom door and walked towards the bed, furrowing her brow when she saw Lily tossing and turning in bed. Her dark curls were sticking to her sweaty forehead and her entire face was distorted in pain. Jane put her hand on the girl's forehead and gasped. "God." Lily was burning hot. Too hot. She practically ran back towards her bedroom and opened the bathroom door to find the thermometer they used that night.

"Jane?"

"Where's that thermometer?"

"Here, on my nightstand. What's wrong, Jane?"

Jane swallowed and hurried to the nightstand Maura mentioned. "Lily's burning up."

Maura, immediately alarmed, threw the blankets away and sat up too quickly.

"Shh, stay…"

Maura shook her head. "I'm coming."

Jane didn't want to argue. Back in Lily's bedroom, Maura didn't even need a thermometer. She felt Lily's forehead and shook her head. "She needs a doctor."

"You're a doctor."

"No. Her fever is too high." Maura sat on Lily's bed and shook her shoulder. "Lily, honey. Wake up."

Lily's eyes shot open and she gasped, out of breath and gasping in pain. "Mama!"

"I'm here." Jane carefully lifted Lily in her arms, feeling heat radiating from her small, skinny body.

"Honey, where do you have pain?"

Lily started crying softly as she hid herself against her mother. "My head and my ears, still. And my neck. My neck hurts so bad, Mommy."

"God." Tears sprung to Maura's eyes and she turned to grab a robe for her little girl. "We need to get her to the hospital. Her fever is way too high."

"What? Maur?"

Maura shook her head and closed her eyes to fight the wave of nausea that washed over her.

"Be careful, babe…"

"We need to go. Now."

Jane felt her heart racing like it hadn't raced before. When her wife reacted like this, something was wrong. Something was very wrong. She had no other choice than to take her sick family with her and drive to the hospital, breaking all the speed limits she could possibly break. Lily was crying in pain the entire ride and all the worst case scenarios were running through Jane's mind.

Anna was standing weak on her legs and Maura wasn't doing much better. Jane was keeping the entire family up and she regretted not calling her mother. It was 4AM and she didn't want to wake her but now that she was holding Anna up and watching Maura pale face, she wished she had.

It all took too long and Jane didn't understand what was happening. She hated this. Maura kept talking Google and mumbling medical terms and Jane felt left out. She wanted to know what was wrong with her little girl that was being examined right now.

In the meantime, she kept beating herself up. Why did she take so long to check on Lily? Did she take too long? If only she checked on Lily before she went to Anna. If only she left Anna sooner. If only she did her job right.

Excruciating thoughts raced through her mind while she sat on a small couch in the waiting room, Anna sitting against her side, fighting sleep as Maura sat on the other side fighting the urge to vomit again. It took too long.

"Mrs. Rizzoli?"

"Yeah?"

"Dr. Isles." A friendly middle-aged man nodded his head at Maura. "You were right."

"Oh god."

"What?"

"Lillian has pneumococcal meningitis."

"Meningitis?" Jane furrowed her brow and felt her heart dropping to her stomach. That was bad. Very bad.

The doctor nodded. "Don't worry too much. We got it in time. She's on strong antibiotics."

"Can we see her?" Maura asked, nervously brushing her hand through her hair.

"Well…" He sighed and smiled apologetically. "I couldn't help but notice that both you and your daughter aren't in the best state… An infection could make things worse."

"I feel fine," Jane said, lifting her hands. "Can I see her?"

The doctor sighed. He didn't want to let her go, not wanting to risk any infection, but he knew he couldn't leave Lily without her parents. "You can."

Jane nodded and turned to quickly kiss her wife's cheek and Anna's still warm forehead. Maura had tears in her eyes and she stopped Jane before she could walk away, gently grabbing her arm. "Give her a kiss from me."

"I will." She kissed her again and followed the doctor into Lily's room, watching her little girl trying to sit up and reaching out her arms towards her mother. "Shh, calm, baby," Jane said softly, tears burning in her eyes. Lily's dark curls were still sticking to her face, her skin looked awfully pale and the bags under her eyes made her look drained. She was shaking and crying, her dark eyes pleading.

Jane didn't care what that doctor thought. She lowered the small rail on the side of the bed and gathered her little girl in her arms, pulling her as close as humanly possible. "I'm here, baby. Mama's here."

"What's wrong with me, Mama?" Lily asked weakly.

"You got an infection in your brain." Jane untangled one arm and carefully traced the IV on top of Lily's small hand. "This thing is pumping medicine into your body to fight it."

"It's a stupid thing." Lily furrowed her brow as tears spilled on her cheeks. She fumbled with the IV but Jane stopped her by gently grabbing her hand.

"It's making you better, baby."

"It hurt."

"Still?"

"No. When the stupid nurse put it in."

Jane sighed and pulled Lily's head to her chest, hating to see her eight-year-old so defeated. She turned her head to see the doctor still standing in the room, looking at a file in his hands. "What are the long terms effects of this?"

He looked up and smiled slightly. "It's too soon to tell. We'll keep an eye on her throughout the night."

Jane nodded. "Okay."

"Make sure she drinks enough fluids."

"I will." Jane sighed and watched the doctor leave before focusing back on her aching daughter.

"Where's Mommy?" Lily asked, silent tears still trickling down her pale cheeks.

"She had to wait outside, baby. So she doesn't make you sicker than you already are." She kissed her daughter's forehead. "This is a kiss from her."

Lily tried to smile she didn't have the energy to reply. Her eyes slipped closed and it only took a short minute before she fell into a deep, restless sleep.

Life was slipping through Jane's fingers and she hated it. She wanted to be in control. She needed to protect her family and take care of her children. She failed. She failed horribly. Lily got meningitis and they didn't even know the consequences of it yet. Her wife and oldest daughter had the flu and were in the hallway, too far away from her. Too far away to keep in her arms. She hated this. She hated it with all she had. She wanted to turn back time. She wanted to change everything. She just wanted her girls to be happy and healthy and she wanted her family to be together.

Tears started falling down her cheeks at the horrible, helpless and empty feeling that filled her. Her girls were her everything. And for the first time in a long time, she prayed. She prayed to a God she didn't know if she believed in. She prayed for the antibiotics to kick in and fight the infection that was causing her little girl so much pain. She prayed for Maura and Anna to get better. And if they couldn't get better, she prayed for them to find peace. She prayed for Lily to stop aching. She prayed for Anna's fever to drop and for Maura's stomach to calm down. She prayed for all of it and when she stopped, the pillow beneath her head was soaked with tears.

She took a deep, shaky breath and closed her eyes again. She prayed for herself. For the first time in her life. She prayed for the aching feeling in her chest to go away. She prayed for the feelings of crippling guilt to fade, she asked for strength. She asked for the love she needed to give and the power to keep standing. God knows she needed it.

 _A/N I'm not a doctor and other than what Google told me, I don't know much about this disease so please be kind if I missed any details. What will happen to Lily? Will she be okay? Let me know what you think!_


	37. Chapter 37

Chapter 37

All Maura wanted was to hold her little girl in her arms. All she wanted was to hold her close and hug her pain away. She couldn't stop her tears from falling. Anna was leaning into her side, her skinny legs tucked under herself as she tried to stay awake. This was excruciating for her too. Maura wished she had the strength to comfort her with reassuring words but she was having trouble finding them to comfort herself.

She tried desperately to be her rational self but it was like her entire mind was fogged up. She knew they had to wait to see how Lily got through the night. She knew there wasn't much she could do but it was killing her. It was killing her to know that she was one of the best medical examiners in the state, had multiple medical degrees and all that intelligence and yet she failed to see this. She failed to see that Lily's fever was too high before she went to bed. She failed to check on her before she went to bed herself, too busy with her own stupid flu. She failed.

Time went by excruciatingly slow. The minutes were ticking away slowly and every second felt heavier and heavier. She thought about her youngest daughter, that beautiful little girl that looked so much like Jane and yet had her own sparkling, energetic personality that left no one untouched. Losing Lily would mean losing a part of her heart. Just the thought of losing her child made her heart ache and her entire body hurt.

"Mama…" Anna's voice pulled Maura out of her thought and she looked up to see her wife slowly walking towards them, her face pale and her eyes shimmering with tears.

"Jane!" Maura stood up too quickly and had to hold herself to avoid fainting. Jane's strong arms immediately held her up and Maura knew in that moment that Jane was close to breaking. She was holding all of them up in her strong arms but it was becoming too much. She saw it in the way her dark eyes stopped sparkling and just seemed empty. "How is she?" Maura whispered, slowly reaching up her hand to cup her wife's cheek.

"Sleeping." Jane sighed deeply. "Scared. In pain."

Maura nodded and leaned forward to wrap her detective up in her arms, putting her arms around her wife's waist. "We have to see how she gets through the night," she whispered. "Let's just stay positive."

"Yeah…" 

Maura pulled back to look into Jane's eyes. "How are you?"

Jane took a deep breath and Maura saw her building that familiar shield around her feelings. She wanted to stay strong for them. "I'm still here."

"You are." Maura smiled slightly and steadied herself against the strong brunette, feeling how weak her own legs were. "Thank God."

"Sit down, Maur," Jane whispered, gently pushing Maura back to the ugly purple couch. "You need to rest."

"I know." Maura sighed. She knew she had to rest. She hated it. "I just want to be with her," she said softly through the fresh tears that filled her eyes.

Jane nodded and opened her arms for Anna who was sitting silently in her place. "You will. Just be with this one while you can, okay?" She smiled slightly and kissed the top of Anna's head as the girl wrapped her arms around her mother's waist in a tight hug. "It's okay, peanut."

"Is Lily gonna be okay?" Anna sniffled softly.

Jane sighed and looked at Maura over Anna's head. They wanted so badly to answer that question but they just didn't know yet. "Things are looking alright so far," Jane answered quietly, knowing she had to be honest with her oldest daughter. "She's on strong medicine. We just have to wait to see how she gets through the night."

Anna nodded against her mother. "Is s-she-… Is she gonna s-survive?"

"Yeah, peanut." Jane pulled back and cupped Anna's face to press her lips against her forehead. "Your sister's a fighter. She'll pull through."

Maura saw those words calming Anna down and she gently reached out to take her arm and make her sit back down next to her. "Go back to Lily, Jane," Maura whispered. "We'll be fine."

"When can we see her, Mom?"

Maura sighed. She wished she knew. "Soon, honey." She watched Jane hurrying back to Lily and felt like a heavy weight dropped on her heart. Tears spilled on her cheeks and she wiped them with the back of her hand before looking at Anna next to her, seeing her shimmering grey eyes looking at her. She smiled through her tears and brushed the girl's sweaty blond hair out of her face. "Come here," she whispered, barely audible while she carefully pulled the young girl into her lap.

Anna curled up against her mother, making herself as tiny as she could to snuggle into warm arms. "Mommy…"

"I know, sweetheart," Maura fought her tears but she failed. There were too many. She allowed them to slowly trickle down her cheeks while she held Anna close to her chest.

The both of them cried through the night, both Anna and Maura occasionally falling into a restless, shallow sleep. When Maura woke up again, her entire body felt stiff and sore, but she felt like her head was cleared. Her stomach was empty but she didn't feel like it was tossing and turning inside of her any longer. She opened her eyes, sighed deeply and looked at her oldest daughter that was slowly waking up in her lap. "Hi, sweetheart."

Anna just groaned and snuggled against her mother, too sleepy to reply. Maura pressed her lips against Anna's forehead and sighed at the knowledge that her fever was dropping slightly. "How are you feeling?"

The girl rested sideways into Maura's arms and shrugged her shoulders. "Tired."

"Hm." She kissed the top of Anna's head and pulled her close for a short moment before gently lifting her off her lap to put her next to her on the couch, feeling a stinging pain in her lower back. "How's your stomach?"

"Better."

"Good." Maura smiled and gently brushed her hair out of her face. They all needed a shower. But clean clothes were the last thing on her mind right now. She just wanted to see Lily.

As if Jane heard her thoughts, she appeared in the waiting room after a few seconds of silence. "Hi." She smiled a tired smile and brushed her fingers through her dark curls. "Doc says you can see her now, he wants to talk to us. I waited until you were awake."

Maura immediately stood up, her head spinning for a second before the fog in her mind cleared. "How is she? Is she strong enough?"

"She's a little better now that she's slept for a few hours. The doctor said she's stable and the antibiotics are kicking in, but they did a few tests and they want to tell us the results."

"Is it bad?" Maura furrowed her brow and followed her wife towards Lily's hospital room, Anna following them closely.

"He's not saying anything." Jane opened the door to Lily's door and tears sprung to Maura's eyes when she saw her little girl lying in that big hospital bed.

As soon as Lily saw her blond mother, she sat up and cried out for her. "Mommy!"

"Oh, sweetheart…" Maura hurried towards the dark-haired girl and scooped her up in her arms, pulling her as close as possible while a desperate sob escaped her body. "I was so worried about you, baby."

"What?" Lily pulled back and looked at Maura with an intense kind of sadness in her eyes that worried Maura.

She cupped her daughter's cheek and repeated her words while looking into her eyes: "I said I was worried about you."

Lily looked intently at her mother's lips while she talked and her eyes lit up when she understood what she said. Maura knew what this meant. She pulled Lily back to her chest and turned her attention towards the doctor in the room. "It's her hearing, isn't it?" Maura whispered.

The doctor sighed and brought up Lily's test results on the iPad in his hands. "Yes."

"She's deaf?" Jane asked, her voice laced with panic.

"Let me finish first." He held up his hand to stop them from panicking. "We don't know if these results are permanent yet. It could all be temporary. Right now, she lost all her hearing in her left ear. She lost part of her hearing in her right ear, but there's a good chance the ear infection still plays a part in that."

Tears filled Maura's eyes as she pulled her daughter close. The rational part of her knew this didn't come close to the worst case scenarios she imagined, but the overwhelming part of her wanted Lily to get back to her old self. She knew it was very unlikely that Lily's hearing would get back to normal ever again.

"Is that it?" Jane asked, her arm wrapped around Anna's chest from behind, her hands resting on her daughter's stomach. "Is there more?"

"No," the doctor smiled at them. "She'll be very tired for a while; the antibiotics and painkillers are quite heavy for a girl her age. But they are kicking in, so we'll continue them for today."

"When can we take her home?"

"It's too soon to say anything about that, I'm sorry. She's strong enough for your wife and daughter to be with her. I'd advice you to keep visitors to a minimum to save her strength, but she can handle a visitor or two."

Maura hadn't even thought about Angela or the rest of the family. She was grateful Jane thought about informing her, otherwise Angela would be in for an awful surprise. She made a mental note to call her and ask her to visit that afternoon. "Thank you."

"We'll perform another hearing test in a few days to determine the long-term effects." He nodded his head at them and opened the door. "Feel free to stay as long as she needs. She…" He smiled and looked at Lily in Maura's arms. "She's a fighter."

Maura smiled proudly and brushed her hand through Lily's messy curls, seeing her dark eyes filled with worry as she tried her best to listen to whatever happened around her. Her small fingers went up to fumble with her ear as thick tears filled her eyes. Maura sat down on the edge of the bed and took Lily in her lap, adjusting the string of the IV so it wouldn't be in the way. She cupped Lily's chin to make her look at her.

"What's wrong with my ear, Mom?" Lily asked, looking intently at her mother.

"Well, the infection made you lose your hearing in this ear," Maura said softly but clearly while she gently touched Lily's left ear. "We don't know if it'll be permanent, it could still get better."

Tears filled Lily's eyes as she concentrated on her mother's words. Listening suddenly took up a lot more energy than usual but at least she was able to understand what was being said as long as she looked at Maura and her right ear was uncovered. Maura smiled sadly and pulled her youngest daughter back to her chest, looking over Lily's head at Anna and Jane who were still standing in the same position, Anna looking at them with concern.

"You okay, Lily?" she asked softly.

"She can't hear you, baby," Maura replied through her tears.

"You gotta make sure she looks at you first," Jane said softly when she noticed Maura had trouble getting out words. "That way she knows you're talking to her and she can focus on what you're saying."

Anna looked up at Jane with tears in her eyes. "Is she gonna be okay?"

Jane swallowed and looked at Maura who sighed deeply and managed a small smile. "Yeah, peanut," Jane replied softly, "she's gonna be okay."

Maura settled back against the bed and took Lily in her arms with her, feeling the girl snuggling into her arms. "It'll be okay, honey."

"Hm?" Lily lifted her head, her right ear had rested on her mother's chest so she couldn't hear a thing.

Maura sighed and gently turned Lily on her other side against her. They would have to adjust. A lot. "It'll be okay, honey," Maura repeated. "We'll get through this."

Lily nodded and her eyes slowly slipped shut, she was too tired to keep them open. Maura rested her cheek against Lily's forehead and soothingly rubbed the girl's back. "Sleep, sweetheart. Mommy's here." She looked at her wife and oldest daughter and saw Jane sitting down in a chair at Lily's bedside, taking Anna's feverish body into her lap.

Maura sighed deeply. Her heart was heavy with worry but her family was together. She had her daughter in her arms, her wife and other daughter right next to her. There was a tough road ahead, she knew it. There was a lot to overcome. For Lily especially, but for all of them. It wouldn't be easy. But right now, all that mattered was that Lily was alive and well in her arms. They were together and as long as they were, they would overcome it.


	38. Chapter 38

Chapter 38

"Do you have everything?" Jane asked, ruffling through Lily's bag to make sure she didn't forget anything important. It had been a long week. A long week where Maura and Anna both got better from the flu and Lily's hearing loss turned out to be permanent. It was like a meteor hit them when they got the results from the last hearing test. The chances were awfully small that she would ever regain her hearing in her left ear. Her right ear regained some hearing but it wouldn't be the same as before. And Jane wondered if her Lily would ever be the same as before. She was silent. Quiet and afraid. She knew the girl was still tired and worn-out, so she hoped with all her heart that Lily would get back to her own self soon.

"Where's my shoes?"

"Over here," Maura said from behind Lily, failing to realize that Lily couldn't hear her like that. She sighed, smiled slightly and took the girl's sneakers, walking around the bed to hand them to her. "Right here, baby."

"Thanks." Lily took them and put them on, trying to tie the laces but failing the first time. She groaned softly and dropped her shoulders, her eyes suddenly shimmering with tears.

Jane sighed. She kneeled in front of her youngest daughter and tied her shoes before standing up to press her lips against Lily's forehead. Every little thing was exhausting her. "You feeling okay to walk yourself?" Jane asked softly as she helped her daughter get off the bed.

Lily nodded weakly and took her mother's hand in hers, looking over her shoulder one last time before leaving the hospital room she had been spending too much time in. The IV was now empty, the bed was made, the room clean and white. It was time to go back home where there were no IV's, no bright white walls or harsh lighting. Just their own warm, safe home.

Lily's head rested against the car window the entire ride home. Jane looked at her while Maura drove them home. The girl's dark eyes stopped sparkling. Dark circles formed underneath them and her cheeks were pale instead of rosy and healthy. Even her curls were flatter than usual. Lily caught her mother looking at her and smiled a small smile.

"We'll be home soon, baby," Jane reached back to squeeze her daughter's leg, hoping to comfort the aching girl.

"Grandma will be waiting," Maura said with a smile. "She's been excited to see you again."

Lily just hummed and Jane suspected she didn't understand half of the words Maura just said. The engine of the car made too much background noise for her to focus on her mother's voice.

Back home, Angela and Anna were waiting for them with hot tea, homemade cookies and milk for Lily. "Hi, my babies!" Angela opened her arms for Lily who slowly walked towards her and allowed her grandmother to pull her in for a squeezing hug. "How are you feeling?"

Lily just shrugged and didn't reply.

"I made cookies," Angela offered, her expression turning to concern. "With chocolate chips and blueberry. Anna helped me make them."

"Which one do you want, Lil?" Anna asked, grabbing the plate from the kitchen counter while she walked towards her sister to make sure she could see her speaking.

"Blueberry." Lily's voice was soft and laced with a sudden insecurity.

"How is she?" Angela furrowed her brow and turned towards the two women in the kitchen.

Maura sighed deeply. "Mostly tired. She's been through a lot."

"Yeah, and there's a long road ahead." Angela looked at Lily and Anna at the dinner table and smiled sadly. "Is she getting used to how things are now?"

"You mean with her hearing?"

"Yeah." Angela's expression dropped.

"She's trying to, but I can see it frustrates her."

Jane bit her lip and felt an aching feeling of concern in the pit of her stomach. She just wanted her Lily back. "She's not herself, Ma," she whispered.

"She's adapting." Angela smiled lovingly but Jane saw concern in her mother's eyes. "She'll be okay."

"God, I hope so." Jane sighed.

"She will." Angela nodded and headed back to the girls to catch up with Lily about her time in the hospital.

Two soft arms wrapped around Jane's waist and she felt a kiss pressed on her neck. She turned and wrapped her own arms around her wife, pulling her in for a tight hug. "I want her back, Maur," she whispered, her voice suddenly laced with tears.

"Me too." Maura squeezed her closer as she hid her face into the crook of Jane's neck. "I just want her to be happy again."

"Do you-… Do you think she'll ever be the same again?"

Maura sighed and lifted her head to lean sideways into the hug, looking at their daughters at the dinner table. "I'm afraid not. I think… I think she'll always be different than she was before."

Jane nodded slowly. Something changed in her little girl. She didn't know if that change could ever be turned back. Probably not.

"But that doesn't have to be a bad thing, Jane," Maura said softly, resting her head on her wife's shoulder. "We all change. Bad things change us but it often makes us stronger."

"Yeah." Jane took a deep breath and kissed the side of Maura's head. "I'm just mostly happy she's still with us."

"God, me too." Maura closed her eyes and squeezed her closer. "I can't even think about losing her."

"Me neither." Jane furrowed her brow when she saw Lily politely excusing herself and walking out of the room, her slow walk turning into running when she reached the stairs. "Lil?" She untangled herself from her wife and walked towards the table where Anna and Angela were left, seemingly surprised but Lily's sudden reaction. "What happened?"

"She just left," Angela shrugged. "Did we do something wrong?"

"She's probably just tired. Right, Ma?" Anna looked at her mother.

Jane hummed but she wasn't so sure about that. She followed her youngest daughter upstairs and saw her bedroom door closed. She slowly opened it and saw Lily sitting on the floor, her shoulders dropped and her head hanging low. "Lily, baby…"

She didn't hear her. Jane walked around her and kneeled to put her hand on her shoulder, effectively startling the little girl. Lily let out a high-pitched squeal and sudden tears sprung to her eyes.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

Lily furrowed her brow and shook her head in frustration.

"I said I didn't mean to scare you," Jane repeated but Lily wasn't focused enough to understand her. "Hey…"

Lily shook her head again and got up from her place on the floor.

"Lils…"

"I-… I-… I c-can't… I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Lily yelled in frustration, her small hands balling up into fists.

"I know, baby. Just-…" 

"STOP IT!" Lily put her hands over her ears and turned away from her mother, screaming louder and louder. "STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT!"

"Lily…" Jane dropped her hands to her side, having no clue what to do to calm her daughter down. The girl was crying loudly, heartbreaking sobs wrecking her skinny body as she almost fell to the ground. Jane put her hand on Lily's back to keep her up but Lily shrugged her away. "Baby… C'mon, calm down."

"STOP IT!"

"What is going on?" Maura hurried into the room, her brow furrowed in concern.

"I can't get her to calm down…" Jane sighed and shook her head, looking at the sobbing girl in the corner of the room. Her hands were still covering her ears and she occasionally screamed out in frustration.

"God." Maura slowly approached her daughter. She didn't speak. She just walked around the crying girl and kneeled down. She took a deep breath to calm herself and smiled while she gently took Lily's hands to pull them down.

Lily allowed it, her breath hitching in her throat.

Maura's fingers started carefully untangling Lily's fists and gently massaged her hands. She didn't speak. She just looked into Lily's eyes, showing love and calmness. Lily looked back at her mother, her dark eyes filled with thick tears that streamed down her face. The sight was absolutely heartbreaking.

Lily cried loudly but she kept her gaze focused on her mother in front of her. After a minute of silence where Lily had more and more trouble breathing, Maura loosened her grip on her daughter's hands and opened her arms, smiling when Lily literally fell into them, hiding herself in the warm embrace.

"God, my baby…" Maura whispered, lifting Lily up in her arms to sit down on the edge of the bed.

The sound of Lily's sobs broke Jane's heart. She had trouble fighting her tears when she looked at her wife and daughter on the bed. Of course Maura could calm her down. She was the calmness in the house. The trick was to not speak to Lily, to not remind her of her hearing loss. Maura could show so much love with just a look, it told Lily more than all the words Jane spoke to her.

She had no idea how heartbreaking this all was for Lily. The girl that was usually so energetic, so cheerful and so fierce had lost her sparkle. Jane knew it would be back, she just didn't know when. Lily was adjusting to her new life. A life where she had to ask people to look at her while they talked. A life where she would miss out on a lot of conversations, a lot of sounds and a part of the world. She could hear. She still heard her mother's voices, she still heard music and the sound of the TV. But she didn't hear the sound of her mother's comforting whispers. She didn't hear the birds that were chirping outside her window. She didn't hear the sound of Maura's soft sniffles while she cried with her. A whole part of the world was now hidden for her. And that hurt. She had to get used to that. She just needed time.

Jane watched Lily's short arms wrapping around Maura's neck as dark curls mingled with blond ones on Maura's shoulder. Maura's soft but strong arms were tightly wrapped around the little girl and she gently rocked them back and forth. Silent tears were trickling down her freckled cheeks and Lily just kept crying and crying until all her tears were gone.

When she finally calmed down, Jane sitting next to them on the bed, Maura gently took Lily's head in her hands and looked into her eyes. She just smiled.

"I can't hear, Mommy," she whispered.

"Can you hear my voice?" Maura asked softly but clearly.

Lily nodded.

"You _can_ hear, sweetheart." Maura brushed her daughter's dark curls back. "You can still hear my voice."

Lily nodded again and reached up her shaking hand to wipe her wet cheeks. "Yeah."

"I know there are a lot of things you can't hear anymore," Maura said, purposely talking slowly and clearly. "And that is so hard, isn't it?"

"Yeah…"

"You just have to try to focus on what you _can_ hear… And if you can't do that sometimes, it's okay to be upset. It's okay to cry, and to scream, and to punch the pillow on your bed…"

Lily chuckled softly through her tears.

"You punched, didn't you?"

"Yeah."

"Good girl." Maura smiled and pressed her lips against Lily's forehead. She pulled back to make sure Lily was looking at her. "It's okay to be sad. We all understand."

Jane took a deep breath to calm herself and cupped Lily's cheek to make her look at her. "Hey, pretty."

"Hi."

"You know how proud I am of you?"

"Proud?" Lily furrowed her brow.

Jane nodded. "Yeah. You're being really, really strong. You're a fighter." She smiled and caressed her daughter's cheek. "My little fighter."

"I didn't do anything," Lily whispered with a shrug. "I just got sick."

"And you got better."

"Yeah, except for my ears." Lily smirked and Jane couldn't stop a chuckle from escaping her.

"You're doing so great."

Lily smiled through her tears and rested her head on Maura's chest, her expression laced with exhaustion. "I'm just so tired, Mama."

"I know, baby. Fighting makes you tired."

Lily nodded weakly against Maura. "Can I sleep in your bed tonight?"

Maura smiled and rested her chin on top of Lily's head. "Just for tonight." She smiled slightly and took a deep breath before pulling back to look at Lily. "But first it's time for a shower."

Lily groaned. "Do I have to?"

"Yes. We all smell like hospital."

"Gross, stupid hospital."

Jane chuckled at her daughter's reaction and leaned forward to kiss her forehead before standing up from the bed. "I'm gonna check on Anna."

"Give her a kiss from me." Maura smiled and stood up as well, carrying Lily in her arms as the girl wiped away her last tears.

Jane knew Anna was worried. She knew how much concern she took with her, taking it over from her mothers. She knew the sensitive young teenager was just as concerned as her mothers. When she arrived downstairs, she saw her mother and Anna on the couch, Angela whispering quiet words of comfort while Anna rested against her side, her head resting on her grandmother's chest while Angela gently rubbed her back.

"Hi." Jane smiled sadly and sat next to Anna. "You okay, peanut?"

Anna looked at her mother and managed a small smile but Jane saw the uneasiness in her daughter. "How's Lily?"

"She's gonna be okay." Jane sighed deeply. She looked up at her mother and saw Angela looking at them with worry and love. "I hope."

"She will." Angela nodded and rubbed her hand up and down Anna's back. "Just like this one here."

Jane was glad to see her daughter finding comfort with her grandmother. She knew they had less attention for Anna and their focus was on Lily most of the time. Anna needed them too. "How about we make Mom and Lily something nice for dinner?" she asked softly. "I bet Grandma will help us whip up something good."

"Of course!" Angela smiled, grateful to be able to help. "Anna? How does that sound?"

"Good." The young girl untangled herself from her grandmother and stretched her muscles. "Can we make spaghetti?"

"We sure can." Jane placed her hands on Anna's shoulders and gently took her towards the kitchen. "With meatballs."

"Of course, otherwise it's no good." Anna chuckled and opened the fridge to look for the ingredients they would need. Ever since she was a little girl, she loved to help her mothers preparing dinner.

While Angela searched the freezer for vegetables, Jane looked at her oldest daughter who was growing up so quickly. "You know, the first day we took you home we ate spaghetti."

Anna smirked. "Yeah, I remember. With meatballs too."

"You ate two plates."

"I haven't changed." Anna chuckled and put a few peppers on the kitchen counter.

"Yeah, and you still don't like Mom's salads."

"Who does?"

"I do!" Angela slapped Anna's shoulder and handed her a bag with frozen vegetables.

Anna giggled and took the bag from her grandmother. Jane saw a sparkle in her grey eyes and she knew she made the right choice by cooking dinner together. It was a way to get their minds off the recent events and just focus on each other and spaghetti.

While the three of them worked in a comfortable silence, Maura came down, carrying Lily on her hip. The girl was getting a little too tall to carry around like that, but she was currently curled up into a ball and completely exhausted. "Oh, it smells like they are making something delicious in here!"

Lily didn't hear her mother and she didn't even bother asking her to repeat it. She was too tired. Maura smiled sadly, stepped towards Jane to kiss her lips and place a kiss on top of Anna's head before taking Lily to the living room, gently laying her on the couch and turning on the television.

"She's utterly exhausted," Maura said softly while she walked back into the kitchen.

"Poor thing," Angela replied with a deep sigh. "What happened upstairs?"

"Just an emotional breakdown." Maura shrugged and brushed her hand through Anna's hair as she kissed the top of her head. "I'm glad it happened, she had been bottling things up."

"Ah, so mother so daughter." Angela smirked at Jane and squeezed her arm as she passed her to grab the pasta.

"Thanks, Ma."

Maura's arms were wrapped around Anna's chest from behind, her chin resting on top of the girl's head. She smiled while she looked at her wife. "Indeed so mother so daughter. The resemblance is uncanny sometimes."

"The same can be said for you two," Jane said, pointing at the two of them.

Anna huffed. "I'm not even Mom's biological kid."

Maura furrowed her brow and pulled back to look at her daughter. "That doesn't matter, Anna."

"I know." Anna shrugged and turned herself back to her original position against her mother's front. "I'm a little like you after all."

"A little?" Angela chuckled and ruffled Anna's blond hair. "More like a lot. You two can't get enough of those books! And don't even get me started on how smart you are, my little genius."

Anna blushed and Jane chuckled when she looked at her wife and oldest daughter. Even physically they looked alike. They both had big, sparkling eyes and blond hair and the ability to stun the people around them with how beautiful they were. And they both had no idea.

 _A/N Sorry for the late update and the sudden ending to this chapter. I'm crazy busy right now! Please let me know what you think! Thank you for all of your kind reviews, it means a lot to me._


	39. Chapter 39

Chapter 39

Maura opened Lily's bedroom door as quietly as possible, peaking her head through the opening to see if her daughter was awake. She smiled when she met with familiar brown eyes that looked up at her in the dark. It was a rainy day in Boston, two weeks after Lily was admitted to the hospital. "Good morning, sweetheart," she said softly while she walked into the room and sat on the edge of Lily's bed. "How are you feeling?"

Lily let out a deep breath and turned on her back, allowing her mother to brush her messy curls out of her face. She smiled tiredly. "My head doesn't hurt as bad anymore."

"Good!" Maura leaned down to kiss her daughter's forehead. She was incredibly proud of her little girl. The hearing loss was exhausting her but she was being so strong throughout all of it. She fought her tears every time she missed part of a conversation again. She allowed herself to cry when it all just became too much by the end of the day. She took her medicine even though they were exhausting her tiny body to no end. Maura thought back to a few days ago when she commented on a bird outside and Lily broke into tears. She couldn't hear the bird. She cried nonstop for almost an hour, clutching to her mother because she finally truly realized what her hearing loss meant.

The situation was affecting the whole family. Anna picked up on their concern and pain and Jane had been restless. As for Maura, she just wanted to hold her little girl in her arms until her pain faded away and she hated to see her children upset. She sighed deeply. "Mama and Anna made pancakes."

"What?"

"Pancakes. Mama and Anna made pancakes." Maura smiled and pulled Lily up in bed, wrapping her arms around the sleepy girl.

Lily grinned at the thought of pancakes for breakfast. "Yeah."

"Come on, baby," Maura said while she gently tugged Lily off the bed, "let's get dressed."

She helped her daughter change into a pair of jeans and a sweater, tying her messy curls into a ponytail before taking her downstairs, following the delicious smell of freshly baked pancakes. She smiled at the sight of Anna and Jane working together, Anna was stirring in a bowl and Jane was scooping a pancake on a plate.

"Hi, kiddo!" Jane turned when she heard Maura and Lily entering the room. "How'd you sleep?"

"Good." Lily walked towards her and looked at the pancakes. "Can I have one?"

"Yeah, go grab a plate." Jane smiled at her wife and pursed her lips, leaning forward to kiss Maura. "Morning."

"Hm, good morning." Maura smiled and tucked a dark curl behind her wife's ear before kissing her again. "Did you sleep well?"

"Like a baby."

"What about you?" Maura asked, running her fingers through Anna's long blond hair that was falling down her shoulders.

"Fine." Anna shrugged and turned sideways into her mother's front for a hug. The young girl had been clingy lately. She was quiet and stayed in the background most of the time but whenever her mothers had time for her, she soaked it up like never before.

Maura knew they had less time for Anna because of Lily. She knew Anna was dealing with a lot of feelings by herself instead of talking about them to her parents like she usually did. It hurt Maura. She wanted so badly to divide her attention between her two daughters but it was harder than it had ever been. She sighed deeply and kissed the top of Anna's head that was resting on her chest while she pulled her close.

"Can you help me with chemistry today?" Anna asked softly, lifting her head to look at her mother.

"Of course." Maura brushed Anna's hair back, feeling happy to be able to do something for her daughter. "After breakfast?"

"I already had a pancake."

Maura gasped playfully and tickled Anna's side. "You did?"

"I had to taste!" Anna giggled and untangled herself from her mother to turn back to the pancake batter. "To see if they taste good."

"And do they taste good?"

"Yep."

"Good." Maura turned to grab a plate for herself and indulge in the guilty pleasure of pancakes. She took place next to Lily and enjoyed a lovely breakfast with her little family on a rainy Sunday morning.

An hour and a half later, Maura and Anna were sitting in Maura's home office on the small couch while they studied Anna's chemistry book. "See?" Maura asked, pointing at a line in the book.

"Yeah." Anna nodded and lifted her knees, resting her book against it. "It's not even that difficult." 

Maura chuckled. "No, it's not." She kissed the side of Anna's head and wrapped her arm around her shoulders. "How are you, sweetheart?"

"What?" Anna furrowed her brow and looked at her mother with a smirk.

"I want to know how you are." Maura chuckled.

"I'm fine."

"Are you?"

Anna sighed and leaned into her mother's side. "I think so…"

"Hm." Maura rested her cheek against the side of Anna's head. "We've been busy, haven't we?"

"Not really, you've been home more than usual."

That was true. They had been home often. But they spent a lot of their time taking care of Lily.

"I know you gotta take care of Lily, Mom," Anna said softly. "It's okay."

Maura sighed. "I'm still sorry," she whispered.

"Why?"

Maura kissed the top of Anna's head. Anna missed her parents but she was too selfless to admit it. "Just because."

Anna chuckled softly and snuggled into her mother's side, staying silent for a while until she turned her head to look at Maura. "Mom? Is it true you used to have a turtle?"

"A tortoise. Yes."

"Really?" Anna's face lit up and she smiled. "Why'd you get rid of it?"

Maura shrugged. "I didn't have time for him. A zoo in Boston adopted him."

"What was his name?" 

"Bass."

"Cool name." Anna smirked and leaned comfortably into her mother's side, putting her chemistry book away to hug her knees to her chest. "Can you still visit him?"

"Yes, I can. But I haven't been in a long time." 

"Why?"

Maura smiled, resting her cheek on top of Anna's head. She hadn't even thought about the unusual pet for such a long time. She missed him sometimes. Bass was a part of her past and even though she loved her life as it was right now, she missed some parts of her past. "I don't know why."

"Can we go see him sometime?" 

"Of course."

Anna smiled contently and snuggled closer against her mother. "Is he big?"

"Quite big, yes. He loved strawberries and lettuce," Maura chuckled at the memory, "but he strongly preferred the most expensive strawberries from the farmers market."

Anna giggled. "I guess it's funny to have a turtle for a pet."

"Tortoise."

"Right."

"Why don't we have pets, Mom?" Anna lifted her head from Maura's shoulder and smiled at her, seemingly enjoying some quiet time with her mother.

Maura brushed a strand of hair behind Anna's ear and shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know, honey. Pets take time and attention."

"Cats don't. Or rabbits. Or fish, or… tortoises."

Maura laughed. "Yes, they do. And I'm not going to be the one to clean the rabbit's house or litterbox because you kids don't do it."

"I'd do it!"

"Well…" Maura sighed. "I'll talk about it with your Ma. Alright?"

"Okay." Anna nodded and turned to rest her head on her mother's chest, snuggling in close.

Maura pulled her daughter close in her arms and kissed the top of her head. "I miss you, baby," she whispered.

"I'm right here!" Anna chuckled.

Maura laughed and tickled Anna's stomach before pulling her close again. "That's not what I meant and you know it."

"Yeah." Anna giggled quietly. "I know. I miss you too sometimes when you're at work and at Lily's doctor's appointments all day."

Maura sighed deeply and kissed her daughter's head. Anna admitted it in the playful mood they were in but Maura knew she would've never said it if it were any other situation. She felt too guilty. "I know, sweetheart."

"But it's okay. Lily's more important right now, I understand."

Maura furrowed her brow. "I don't think that's true, baby. Lily's not more important. She just requires more attention at the moment, that's all. You're all equally important."

Anna smiled a small smile and they stayed silent for a few minutes, Anna snuggling against her mother while Maura hugged her close. "Mom?"

"Hm?"

"Do you ever feel sorry for not getting another baby by yourself?"

Maura chuckled at the sudden change of subject. "I think you and Lily keep us quite busy, honey."

"You never thought about a third kid?" Anna asked, turning her head on Maura's chest to look up at her.

"We've talked about it but I think two is a nice number." Maura smiled and brushed her hand through her daughter's blond hair. "Would you have wanted another sibling?"

"Nah." Anna shrugged. "It's fine like this, I guess."

"I think so too." Maura sighed contently and rubbed Anna's back, listening to the rain that was beating against the windows. "It's really coming down!"

To emphasize Maura's words, a loud thunder sounded through the room and Anna stiffened against her mother. "I hate thunderstorms," she mumbled quietly.

Maura chuckled. "I know." She kissed the top of Anna's head. "I'm here, the thunder is really high up in the sky, remember?"

Anna giggled and nodded against her mother's chest. "Yeah, you always said that when I was little."

"I did, and somehow it calmed you down."

"Yeah." Anna smiled and Maura thought back to those times when there was a loud thunderstorm and their little Anna would come running into their room, climbing in bed in between her parents to get away from the thunder and lightning. She would cover her ears at the sounds and squeeze her eyes shut every time. Maura chuckled to herself. She secretly loved thunderstorms.

"Mommy, mommy!" The door to Maura's office opened and Lily came hurrying into the room. "Did you see the storm?"

Maura laughed and shook her head. "No, baby. What is it?"

"Look!" Lily tugged on Maura's hand to get her up from the couch and lead her towards the window. "Look how hard the wind's blowing…"

"Oh, that is quite a storm!" Maura gasped when she looked at the leaves and branches that were currently being blown across the street. "Did we secure the door of the garage?"

"How would I know?" Lily lifted her hands and shook her head.

Maura laughed and brushed Lily's dark curls back while she felt Anna standing next to her. "Right."

"Did you see that?" Lily gasped as a flash of lighting lit up the street.

Maura chuckled and wrapped her arms around Lily from behind, kissing the back of her head. She was happy to see her little girl excited again. It had been a while. When a loud thunder sounded through the room, Maura wrapped one of her arms around Anna and covered her ear, gently pulling her into her side.

"I'm not little anymore, Mom," she mumbled quietly.

"I know but you still don't like thunderstorms," Maura whispered back so Lily couldn't hear it.

Anna chuckled and her cheeks turned red with an embarrassed blush, eliciting a chuckle from her mother. "Don't worry, I won't tell anyone."

"You better not." Anna smirked.

"Look, Mommy," Lily pointed at a man and a dog that were walking across the sidewalk on the other side of the street. He was trying to hold up an umbrella and failing miserably. "Silly." She giggled and leaned into her mother's front.

Maura chuckled. "Poor man."

"The dog loves it though." Anna pointed at the dog who was jumping around in puddles and barking at leaves. "See Mom? We should get a dog, dogs are fun."

Maura was grateful Lily didn't hear Anna's words otherwise she wouldn't get rid of this question for weeks to come. "Oh please, imagine having to walk a dog in this weather!"

"Yeah… Okay." Anna nodded with a small smile.

The door to Maura's office opened and Jane walked in, smiling when she saw her wife and two children huddled up in front of the window. "Maur."

"Hm?" Maura turned her head to look at her wife.

"Bad news."

"Oh we didn't secure the garage door, did we?" Maura dropped her shoulders and tilted her head, sighing deeply.

"Nope." Jane smirked. "Two inches of water, but the car's still good and so are the boxes."

"Good."

"Did you close the door?" Anna asked, turning to look at her dark-haired mother.

"No I left it open, figured the boxes could use some water."

"Ma! My books are in there!" Anna gasped and furrowed her brow in anger.

"I know, I'm kidding." Jane chuckled and walked towards her daughter to brush her hair back.

Anna pouted and playfully slapped Jane's leg. "Stupid joke."

Maura laughed and noticed Lily looking up at them with intense concentration, trying desperately to follow the conversation. There was sadness in her dark eyes. She missed too many things to understand what it was about. Maura smiled sadly and caressed the girl's cheek. "Mama made a joke about Anna's books," she explained softly but clearly.

Lily smiled gratefully and gasped. "Really? You can't joke about Anna's books."

Maura laughed. "Right?"

"She mad?" Lily leaned over to look at her sister but saw a smile on Anna's face.

Anna shook her head and leaned into Jane's side as the brunette's arms wrapped around her shoulders. "Oh," Jane turned and touched Maura's arm, "the doctor called, Lily's gotta be at that hearing care place on Thursday."

"Hm, good. What time?"

"Three."

"I'll clear my schedule."

Lily looked up at her mother and straightened her back. "I'm finally gonna get the ear things?" She smiled hopefully and Maura tucked a dark curl behind her ear.

"Maybe. You'll have to take another test first."

" _Another_ one?" Lily groaned and dropped her shoulders, slumping back against her mother with a pout. "I'm so sick of those! I can't hear the stupid beeps!"

"I know, sweetheart." Maura sighed and wrapped her arms around the little girl from behind, her hands resting on Lily's stomach. "But the woman was so friendly last time, remember? And they are going to help you."

"Yeah." Lily wrinkled her nose. "But the beeps are still stupid. They're annoying and stupid."

"Oh stop it." Maura squeezed her daughter in her arms. "Mama or I will go with you and it will be just fine."

Lily sighed and nodded, leaning into her mother's front while she stared at the storm outside. She was sick of doctor's offices, hearing tests and medicine. She was sick of being examined over and over again and people being worried about her. But Maura knew she had to drag her through it. They had to take Lily by her hand and stand by her side throughout all of it. Even if hearing aids wouldn't turn out to be a solution, they would find a different solution. They had no idea what solution that would be but Maura knew there would be one.

She kissed the top of Lily's head and straightened her back. "How about lunch, babies?"

"What?"

"Lunch. Are you hungry?"

"Yep. I'm always hungry for lunch." Lily smirked and untangled herself from her mother and hopped away. "Can we have hotdogs?"

"Hotdogs?" Maura gasped and turned to follow Lily and Anna out of the room. "Are you out of your mind?"

"No, I'm very much in my mind!" Lily giggled and walked behind Anna to head downstairs. "Hotdogs are yummy."

"Well, we don't have any and I won't allow you to have them. I'll prepare some sandwiches instead, does that sound good?"

"Peanut butter and jelly?"

Maura sighed, shaking her head while she looked over her shoulder at her wife. "I wonder where she gets her taste in food."

Jane smirked. "She learns from the best."

Maura tilted her head and stopped to lean into her wife and press her lips against Jane's for a loving kiss. "She does."

"How's Anna?" Jane asked, her strong arms wrapping around Maura's waist.

Maura sighed while she reached up to put her hands on the brunette's neck. "She'll be alright. She just needs some quality time with us."

"That can be arranged." Jane leaned forward and pressed her lips against her wife's forehead. "Have I told you you look beautiful today?"

Maura chuckled and shook her head. "No, you haven't."

"Well, you do."

"Thank you." She smiled lovingly and moved her hand to stroke Jane's cheek, looking deeply into those dark eyes she loved so much. "You don't look so bad yourself, detective."

Jane was about to reply when Lily's voice called them from downstairs. "Mommy! Mama!"

Maura sighed deeply. "Our youngest is getting impatient."

"Of course she is, you promised her food." Jane chuckled and untangled herself from the blonde, kissing her lips one last time before taking her hand and leading her downstairs.

"And as you taught me once," Maura said, following her wife to the children, "there is no waiting when it comes to food."


	40. Chapter 40

Chapter 40

Jane stood in front of the window of Lily's classroom, watching as all the children talked over each other, laughing, joking and playing while Lily sat in her seat and scribbled with her pencil on a piece of paper. The bell rang and all the kids shoved their chairs back and shot up to run out of the classroom towards lunch but Lily stayed seated. She put her pencil away, took the piece of paper with her and stood up from her seat. The teacher said goodbye to her and Lily smiled politely when she said it back before heading out of the classroom.

When she saw her mother standing in the hallway, she smiled and hurried towards her. "Mama!"

"Hi, baby." Jane wrapped her arms around her little girl and pulled her into a sweet hug. "How was your day?"

"Loud." Lily sighed and took Jane's hand to walk outside where it was quieter.

"Hm, those new hearing aids take time to get used to."

"They make my head hurt," Lily said softly as they walked onto the playground. She covered her ears when they passed a particularly loud group of kids that were playing tag.

Jane sighed. It was Tuesday and Lily had been going to school for half days since that week, but even those few hours were exhausting her. She was still on medicine and her body was just exhausted from being sick. Combined with her brand new hearing aids, the girl was drained.

"Can I take them out, Mama?" she asked when they arrived at the car.

"No, baby. The doctor said it's better to keep them in, remember?" She opened the door for her daughter. "You can take them out when you go for a nap later."

Lily groaned and climbed into the backseat. "Is Mommy home?"

"Yeah." Jane smiled and took her place behind the wheel. "She's working though, but she's in her office." She looked at her daughter in the rearview mirror and saw her pale cheeks, the dark circles under her eyes as her head rested against the window. Her hearing got exponentially better with the hearing aids. Her right ear was directing the sound to her left ear, which made it possible to hear with both ears again. The hearing loss was still too severe to go back to normal, but it was a lot better than before. However, all those new sounds were exhausting Lily. The world suddenly got a lot louder for her.

When they arrived home, Lily threw her backpack on the floor and took off her coat, her shoulders hanging low. Maura came walking into the room and furrowed her brow when she saw her daughter. "Hi, honey. How was school this morning?"

Lily just shrugged. "Fine."

"Hm." Maura hummed and brushed Lily's hair back, looking surprised when the girl stopped her. "What is it?"

Lily shook her head and put her dark curls back where they were, covering her ears. Jane sighed deeply. "Baby, you can barely see them."

"They're ugly." Lily shrugged away from her mother and turned towards the kitchen.

Maura straightened her back and looked at Jane with concern in her eyes. Normally Lily liked to wear her messy curls in a ponytail so her hair wouldn't get into her eyes but ever since she got the hearing aids, she had been wearing it down. She wanted to cover them. "They're not ugly, Lil." Jane said while she walked around her daughter to look at her. She kneeled down to be at eye-level with the short girl and caressed her cheek. "They help you."

Lily nodded weakly. "I just don't want the other kids to see them."

"Why not?"

Lily shrugged, fumbling with the string of her sweater. "'Cause then they know something's wrong with me."

"Honey…" Jane looked up at Maura and saw her looking at them with her hand covering her mouth, tears in her hazel eyes.

"There is nothing wrong with you, sweetheart," Maura whispered too quietly for Lily to hear. She realized that and kneeled next to Jane to look at the little girl. "There's nothing wrong with you."

Much to their surprise, Lily smiled. "Yeah, there is. I'm deaf."

"Not completely. You can hear so much better with these!" Maura tried again to brush Lily's hair back but the girl moved her head away so Maura couldn't reach her.

"I need those stupid things to hear. I can't hear well enough on my own."

Jane sighed. "Baby, there's nothing wrong with that."

"No but it's stupid."

"Well…" Jane bit her lip to try to think about something to make her daughter feel better. She smiled when she got an idea. "Hey, you know how Mommy wears glasses at night and in the car sometimes?"

"Yeah." Lily nodded. 

"Y'know, when Mommy's tired or when it's dark out, she can't see very well."

"Really?"

"Yep. She needs those glasses to help her see." Jane looked at her wife and saw a concerned smile curling her lips. "But I think those glasses look beautiful on her."

"It doesn't matter if you need those to hear, honey," Maura added. "Just like it doesn't matter that I need glasses to see sometimes."

"Yeah but you only need them sometimes. Not all the time."

"There will be a day when I need them all the time. I'm not getting any younger and don't tell this to Mama," Maura leaned in closer to whisper in Lily's ear, "but I need them at work to read reports sometimes."

"Really?" Lily chuckled and looked at her mother. "You're like an old granny with glasses."

Maura gasped and tickled Lily's side. "Watch it, young lady!"

Lily laughed and seemed to forget about her insecurities for the moment. Jane smiled at the sight and leaned forward to wrap her arms around her little girl. "I love you, baby," she said softly. "You and those things."

"I love you too but not those things." Lily smirked shyly and pulled back.

"That's okay. As long as you keep loving yourself 'cause you're the best little lady in the world." Jane chuckled and ruffled Lily's dark curls before kissing her forehead.

"I am the best." Lily giggled and allowed Maura to kiss her cheek.

"Watch it." Jane laughed and stood up to grab the drawing Lily made in school. "What did you draw, baby?"

Lily chuckled. "Buttronauts."

"Excuse me?"

Lily laughed harder and stood next to Jane to point at the picture. "See? They're astronauts 'cause they're flying around the moon and stuff," she giggled and looked at Maura quickly, "But they're butts." The girl laughed louder, the beautiful sound echoing through the room as she clutched her stomach. "Get it? BUTTS!"

"That's just inappropriate." Maura shook her head in disapproval.

Jane couldn't help but laugh. Her daughter had a good sense of humor. "You came up with that by yourself?"

"Yep." Lily nodded proudly and took the drawing to put up on the fridge, grabbing a magnet to stick it on the front.

"Oh no, I will not have this in our kitchen!" Maura pointed at the fridge. "Take that down."

"But Mommy-…"

"No. It's inappropriate."

Lily groaned and reluctantly took the picture down. "Guess I'll put it up in my room then."

"That's better." Maura replied as she was about to head to the kitchen when the doorbell rang.

"You expecting anyone?" Jane asked.

"No."

"Rachel!" Jane opened the door and saw the teenager standing outside, seemingly just getting out of school. "Hi, come in."

"Since when do you enter through the front door?" Maura chuckled and greeted Rachel by squeezing her arm. "Hi."

"Hi." Rachel smiled and put her backpack on the couch. "How are you doing, Lily?"

"Good. Just my ears are broken but the rest of me is fine." Lily wiggled on her feet as she tried to reach the cookie jar on the kitchen counter.

"Right." Rachel chuckled.

"What brought you here, honey?" Maura moved the cookie jar away from Lily and playfully slapped her hand.

"Well… Okay first of all I once promised Maura I'm gonna find a way to thank you for getting me that scholarship."

"You did."

"I haven't thought about anything good, so I'm gonna find a way. But-…" she opened her backpack and got out a crumbled up piece of paper. "I got you this."

"What's that?"

"You can't open it until I'm gone and-…" Rachel spoke quickly and swung her backpack on her shoulders again, "and I know it's cheesy and I'm probably gonna regret it but I feel like I owe you so…" she sighed nervously and bit her lip. "Read it when I'm gone."

She handed the piece of paper to Maura and hurried out of the house, leaving the women baffled and confused. "What the-…" Jane's mouth hung open as she stared at the closed front door.

Maura was already looking at the piece of paper with tears in her eyes, reading the words that were written in a neat girl's handwriting.

 _Dear Jane and Maura,_

 _I will never be able to thank you for what you did for me and my family. You saved Morgan and me and I'm pretty sure you saved Dad too. You gave us a home when we had to run away from our own and you taught us what it was like to have a mother when we lost ours. On top of that, you found a way to give me a future. Without you, I'd be working at the garage for the rest of my life. Without you, I wouldn't know how sex and periods work, I wouldn't know how to deal with boys and high school life. Without you, I'd be lost. Morgan found her first true friend in Anna and a family with you and I'm so grateful she has you to take care of her. When I leave for college, I know she'll be alright without me because she has you._

 _I'm going to find a better way to thank you, but this is all I have for now. Thank you._

 _Love, Rachel._

Tears trickled down Maura's cheeks and Jane just felt like she was nailed to the floor and her throat was closed up with a large lump. She took a deep, shuttering breath and saw Maura grabbing her phone from the table. She looked up Rachel's name and typed a text.

 _Rachel, get your butt back here right now so I can give you a hug._

She chuckled through her tears when she sent it. Jane smirked and wrapped her arms around her wife's waist from behind, hiding her face into the crook of her neck. "She won't come."

"I know." Maura smiled and turned to return the embrace, her arms wrapping around Jane's neck. "I love that girl."

Jane sighed contently and kissed Maura's neck that was exposed under her ponytail. "We all do."

Maura's phone buzzed and she untangled one arm to look at the reply to her text, laughing when she read it.

 _Nope. Love you._

She replied with a few sweet words and turned back into the warm embrace. "It feels like our first child is going to college and I'm not nearly ready for that."

"Anna's only twelve so we're actually not even close to sending off our first kid to college." Jane smirked and pulled her wife closer. "But I get how you feel."

"Mommy?" Lily walked towards her mothers, looking confused. "What's going on? Why's Rachel gone again?"

"Rachel wrote something very sweet for us, honey." Maura pulled back and brushed her hand through Lily's curls. "It made us a little emotional."

"Is she okay?"

"Yeah, baby. She's fine." Jane caressed Lily's cheek and walked towards the kitchen. "How about sandwiches for lunch and then a nap?"

"Yeah." Lily smiled at the idea of food and followed her mother into the kitchen.

She grabbed some bread from the cabinet and Jane smiled when she saw her tucking a few curls behind her ears as they got into her face. Two small plastic strings came into view, attached to a small black device behind her ear. She didn't hesitate and just smiled up at her mother while she handed her the bread.

"Thanks, baby." Jane gently caressed Lily's cheek and looked into those dark eyes she loved so much. Het little girl would be alright. It was a long road but Jane knew it would end well.

 _A/N I'm a little at loss for inspiration so I'm sorry if it's all just fluff and mushiness. It's what I love to write. Let me know if you have any ideas for this story! I'll find some inspiration and then I think I could go on forever. ;) Thank you all for reading and reviewing, it's what keeps me going!_


	41. Chapter 41

_A/N Thank you so much for your kind reviews and suggestions! I got a new wave of inspiration so I can definitely go on for a few more chapters. I can't believe how long this story is getting… And I can't believe you are all still hear to read it! It truly means the world to me. I got a request for more Rizzles so here it is. Nothing really happens but it's all good fluff. Bigger things and some angst are coming up! Hope you all like it!_

Chapter 41

"It's pretty romantic like this," Jane smirked as her arms tightened around her wife's waist from behind. The two women were standing under the porch shed behind the house, watching as the rain dribbled down on the grass. Inside warm lights were glowing, their two girls peacefully asleep.

"It is, isn't it?" Maura smiled contently and leaned back into her wife's front, her fingers lacing with Jane's on her stomach. The air smelled wonderful; like rain after a sunny day. It was crisp and fresh and Maura felt a sense of bliss overwhelming her. A flash of cold wind blew across her face and she closed her eyes. "I'm happy," she whispered.

"Hm?"

Maura turned in Jane's arms and smiled up at the beautiful brunette. "I'm happy."

Jane chuckled. "Thanks for the heads up."

"Jane." Maura shook her head and slapped her wife's arm.

"I'm happy you're happy," Jane whispered against Maura's neck. "You make me happy."

Maua hummed and turned to look into her wife's beautiful dark eyes, marveling yet again at her gorgeous sharp features, that seductive smirk and those godly beautiful brown eyes. She combed her fingers through her dark curls, smiling at how big they were because of the humidity outside. "I love you," she whispered. "I love you, Jane."

"I love you too, Maur," Jane's voice was huskier than normal and her smirk turned into a loving smile that made Maura's stomach tingle.

After all those years of marriage, she was still head over heels in love with her wife. Maura lifted her hand and rested it on Jane's cheek, her thumb making soft strokes over her sharp cheekbone. She smiled lovingly and moved to stroke the dimple that appeared in the brunette's cheek. "You are gorgeous," she whispered while she looked deeply into Jane's dark brown eyes. "Absolutely gorgeous."

Jane lightly shook her head like she always did. She had no idea how gorgeous she was. "Have you seen yourself?" she said with a smirk.

"As a matter of fact, I have. There are these things called mirrors?"

"Is that sarcasm?"

"It might be." Maura chuckled and moved her arms around Jane's neck to pull her in for a tight hug, capturing her lips in a loving kiss while she did so. She felt Jane humming softly as her tongue traced her lips before deepening the kiss quickly. They giggled into each other's mouth as they stumbled back and collapsed on the porch bench, Maura straddling Jane's lap as she kept herself up around the taller woman's neck.

A while later, Maura collapsed against Jane, panting heavily as she hid her face into the crook of her wife's neck. "Wow."

"Well that's a first," Jane panted quietly, her arms tightening around her wife's waist after adjusting the skirt of her dress.

"God, that was just inappropriate." Maura gasped and felt her muscles relaxing, every inch of her body humming with pleasure.

"You complaining?" Jane chuckled and nuzzled herself into her wife's blond hair.

"Definitely not." Maura smiled and pulled herself back to look at the beautiful brunette, smoothing her even messier curls and pulling her shirt back down. "Let's just hope the neighbors are asleep."

"Yeah…" Jane chuckled and rested her chin on Maura's shoulder, pulling her closer. "Looks like there's a storm coming."

"Again?" Maura sighed and moved off Jane's lap to snuggle into her side. "The weather has been crazy lately."

Jane just hummed and pressed her lips against the side of Maura's head. "Let's just hope there won't be any thunder."

As if the universe heard Jane, a quiet thunder rolled through the sky, eliciting a chuckle from both women. "Too bad." Maura rested her head on Jane's shoulder and laced their fingers together in her lap while she stared at the dark backyard. It wasn't big, but it was enough. The porch they built a few years ago made it perfect for a night like this when it wasn't too cold outside. "I love this," she whispered quietly. "I missed this."

"Me too." Jane sighed deeply and Maura turned her head to see her wife staring at her with that love-drunk smile on her face.

She chuckled and cupped Jane's chin to kiss her lips. "It's good to remind myself how lucky I am to be with you," she whispered. "At nights like this… It truly hits me that I'm the luckiest woman in the world to spend life with you by my side."

"Maur…"

"I mean it." Maura moved her hand to brush her wife's messy curls out of her face. "I'm so lucky that you picked me."

"Picked you? Maur, I don't think that was a choice." Jane chuckled and squeezed her hand in hers. "I just fell in love, nothing I could do about that."

"You chose to be my girlfriend. You chose to be with me, as socially awkward and nerdy as I am. You married me, Jane. You chose to spend your life with me and for that I am forever grateful." Maura leaned forward to rest her forehead against Jane's, smiling lovingly.

"Wouldn't want it any other way." She kissed the blonde in her arms but pulled back when they heard footsteps.

Maura looked up and smiled when she saw Anna in the doorway. "Hi, baby."

"Hey, peanut." Jane pulled away from her wife and turned towards the twelve-year-old. "Thunder, huh?"

"No." Anna shook her head and folded her arms in front of her chest, shivering in just a big pajama shirt. "I-… I just couldn't sleep. Not because of thunder. No. Just-… Because. I couldn't sleep."

"Right."

Maura slapped Jane's leg and opened her arms for the girl. "Come here."

Anna raised her shoulders and took place in between her mothers when they scooted away to make room for her. She hugged her knees to her chest and leaned into Maura's side.

"You couldn't sleep?" Maura asked, resting her cheek against the side of Anna's head.

Anna shook her head.

"How come?"

"I don't know."

Maura hummed and pursed her lips, squinting her eyes when she stared at the rain that was coming down harder and harder.

"It's raining so much lately…" Anna said, pulling her shirt over her knees. "I want it to be summer again."

"We're going into the wrong time of year then, peanut." Jane smirked and brushed her fingers through Anna's hair.

"Yeah but my birthday is soon." Anna smiled. "So that's the best time of year."

Maura chuckled and pulled Anna's shirt back from her knees to avoid stretching the fabric. "My baby girl turning thirteen…"

"I'm not a baby girl."

"No, not anymore."

Anna chuckled and rested her head on her mother's shoulder.

Maura sighed contently and placed a kiss on top of Anna's head. "I love you, sweetheart," she whispered, the sound almost inaudible due to the weather. Thunder and lightning were coming closer together and the sounds got louder and louder, causing Anna to tense further.

"Mom?"

"Hm?"

Anna lifted her head and looked up at the dark sky. "Do you think heaven is real?"

"I don't know, baby. I don't think anyone knows for sure."

"What do you think, Ma?"

Jane shrugged. "I like to think so, yeah."

"Me too." Anna nodded and lowered her legs, swinging her bare feet back and forth. "Otherwise it's all so useless, you know?"

Maura smiled and gently caressed Anna's cheek, surprised by the subject of her daughter's thoughts. She believed in science and she was not religious whatsoever but she knew Jane was and she knew Jane wanted to pass on parts of that to their children.

"My mother couldn't have died and then everything stopped, right? She worked so hard and she was treated so badly… She has to be in heaven. Don't you think?" Anna looked at Jane, her brow furrowed in thought.

"Yeah, peanut," Jane replied softly. "I think so too."

Anna nodded and leaned back against Maura's side. "But that doesn't happen anymore, does it? What happened to my mother?"

Maura sighed deeply and swallowed a lump in her throat when she looked at her daughter's hopeful grey eyes. She wanted her daughter to keep thinking that but she knew she couldn't lie. "It does," she whispered.

Anna's eyes widened and her expression dropped. "What?"

"Human trafficking is a worldwide problem, even here in the US."

"So…" Anna shook her head and blinked her tears away. "There are still women out there being sold-… For-… Just like her?"

Maura nodded.

"How? Why- Why aren't we working on that? Why aren't people doing something about that?"

"There are, baby," Jane said, rubbing her hand up and down Anna's leg to calm her down.

"But it's not on the news! Why's the government so busy with stupid things when this is happening?" Anna shook her head again and wiped a single tear that made its way down her pale cheek. "That's so unfair!"

"I know, peanut."

Anna huffed and crossed her arms, her brow furrowed in anger. She lost herself in her thoughts for a while until she sighed and lifted her chin. "When I'm gonna be the president, I'm going to stop that. I'm going to make sure all those awful people go to jail and can never hurt anyone ever again."

Maura smiled slightly while she brushed her hand through her daughter's blond hair. Anna was so intelligent but she could be so naïve. If only she knew how awfully big this problem was. It was bigger than all of them.

"You're gonna be a great president," Jane said with a proud smile.

"I know I'm probably not going to be the president," Anna said softly, smiling as she fumbled with the hem of her shirt.

"Why not? I though that was a cool idea for a career path!"

Anna shrugged. "I don't know. I'm-…" she sighed and smiled sadly, "I'm not that confident. And I don't think I'm good enough."

"Okay you gotta stop thinking that then," Jane took Anna's chin to look into her eyes. "You can do anything you set you mind to, peanut."

"I know that's not true, Ma. I can't be a professional baseball player like Lily wants to and I can't be-…"

"What? What can't you be?"

Anna shrugged. "I don't know. A supermodel?"

Maura laughed and shook her head. "You could be a supermodel if you wanted to. Have you seen yourself?"

"Well yeah but I won't allow you to be a supermodel so you're right in that. That's something you can't be." Jane's lips turned into a sharp stripe at the thought of her little girl being a model. "But you can be anything else. Except a rockstar."

"Ah dang, that was my dream!" Anna chuckled at her mother.

"Sorry. Not gonna happen."

Maura laughed and pulled her daughter closer into her side. "You have a long time to figure what you want to be, honey. There's no rush."

"Yeah." Anna smiled contently but flinched when a loud thunder interrupted her.

Maura chuckled softly and kissed the top of Anna's head. "How about we go back inside? The weather's only getting worse."

Anna nodded and stood up to head back inside, hurrying away from the storm. Maura laughed and felt Jane's hand grabbing hers, squeezing softly. "Our little girl the president," Jane chuckled.

"Don't mention it." Maura laughed and took a cushion from the bench to avoid it getting wet from the rain before walking inside and closing the door behind her. "You should get back to bed, honey."

Anna nodded. She sighed deeply and wrapped her arms around her mother's waist for a goodnight hug. "Night, Mom."

"Sleep well, honey," Maura kissed the top of Anna's head. "Just close the windows and curtains and we're right here."

"I know." Anna squeezed her mother before letting go to kiss Jane and head upstairs to get back to bed.

Maura smiled lovingly at the sight of her older daughter. She stepped towards her wife and wrapped her arms around her slim waist, pressing a kiss on her neck after she brushed her curls away. "She's getting less self-confident," she whispered.

"Yeah…" Jane sighed and placed her hands on Maura's arms around her waist. "I hate that."

"Puberty is just around the corner," Maura replied with a small chuckle, "I'm afraid it won't get any better."

"We'll help her see how amazing she is. Puberty's got nothing on us." Jane smirked and turned in Maura's arms to face her, capturing her lips in a sweet kiss.

"We can handle puberty," Maura whispered, reaching up her hands to place them on Jane's shoulders. She stared into her eyes, her breath again taken away by her wife's beauty.

Jane tightened her arms around Maura's waist. "We should get to bed. The girls have school tomorrow. And we have work."

Maura sighed. "You did remember you have to take them, right? I have an early meeting."

"I did not remember that but I will now." Jane kissed her wife again before letting her go and starting to lock up the house for the night.

Maura chuckled as she headed upstairs to get to bed, stopping by Lily's bedroom door to walk in and give her sleeping daughter a kiss. "Sweet dreams, sweetheart," she whispered while she looked at the sleeping form of her little girl, dark curls splayed out on the yellow pillow, her closed eyes twitching along with the dream she had. Maura chuckled quietly and leaned down to kiss her head. "I love you."

She stood back up and walked out of Lily's room, seeing Anna's bedroom door slightly open, the windows and curtains closed. She smiled to herself and went to their bedroom, getting out of her dress and into a pair of silk pajamas. After brushing her teeth and loosely braiding her hair, she slid into bed behind her wife and wrapped her arms around her, snuggling in close. "Good night, my love."


	42. Chapter 42

Chapter 42

"I'm so sorry I'm late!" Jane entered the house, throwing her car keys in a drawer and shrugging off her jacket. "Where's my birthday girl?"

"Here." Anna turned in her seat in the chair in the living room, standing up when she saw her dark-haired mother.

"Come here!" Jane smiled and wrapped her daughter up in a tight hug. "Happy birthday, peanut."

Anna chuckled and accepted the embrace by wrapping her own skinny arms around her mother's waist. "Thanks."

"I'm sorry I wasn't here for breakfast, baby," Jane said softly, pulling back to brush the girl's blond hair out of her face.

"It's okay. Did you catch the guy?"

"It was a woman. And yeah, we got her."

"Good."

"Did Mom at least make you something good for breakfast?" Jane asked her, looking at Maura who was preparing cake in the kitchen.

Anna nodded. "Yeah, we had waffles."

"Oh wow, she went all out."

"Yeah." Anna chuckled and leaned into Jane's side, her smile falling as she yawned in exhaustion. Parties would never be Anna's thing.

Jane stepped forward to look into the living room, seeing her mother, Frankie, Korsak, Morgan, Tommy and TJ. They told the family they were going out for dinner with just the four of them so they all stopped by after Anna came back from school that afternoon, resulting in a crowded house. Anna loved all of these people, Jane knew that for sure. But a lot of people in one room, all talking though each other, all wanting attention, that was exhausting for the introverted teenager.

Teenager. Jane sighed and brushed her fingers through Anna's blond hair that was partly clipped together on the back of her head. "You're growing up too quickly, my little peanut," she said softly while she looked at the beautiful girl against her side. "Thirteen!"

Anna just nodded. "I guess. I don't feel any different than when I was twelve."

"Well the difference is not that big." Jane chuckled and kissed the top of Anna's head.

"That's true. But Mom's acting like I'm moving off to college tomorrow." Anna giggled and turned to hide herself closer against Jane's side.

Jane sighed. "Just a little longer, baby. Tonight's just for us."

"I know. I don't mind, they all came for me." Anna smiled to herself. "I just-… Makes me tired, that's all."

"I know." Jane smirked and patted Anna's back, giving her another kiss before letting her go to greet her family.

"Jane! Congrats on your oldest." Tommy lifted his glass and nodded his head.

"Thanks." Jane chuckled and leaned down to kiss her mother's cheek. "Hi, Ma." 

"Hi, honey."

"TJ buddy! How are you?" She ruffled the boy's hair while he sat next to his grandmother, playing a game on Maura's iPad.

"Hi, aunt Jane." He looked up and smiled quickly before turning back to his game.

Jane chuckled and headed towards the kitchen where Maura was putting a few pieces of leftover cake away in the fridge. "Hi, babe," she said softly as she wrapped her arm around her shoulders and captured her lips in a loving kiss.

"Hi." Maura's eyes sparkled and she looked absolutely stunning in a pair of blue pants, a dark blouse and her hair tied up in a classy bun.

"Sorry I'm so late, I got caught up in interrogation."

"It's okay." Maura shook her head and closed the fridge to wrap her wife in for a loving hug. "We saved the presents for when you came back."

"Thanks." Jane inhaled the lovely smell of her wife's perfume along with birthday cake and tea. "Our little girl is thirteen."

"God." Maura closed her eyes and shook her head, resting her head on Jane's shoulder. "She's been in our lives for ten years."

"We've been mommies for ten years."

Maura turned and looked up at her wife with a loving smile. "The best ten years of my life."

"Remember how she got here?" Jane chuckled and looked at Anna in the living room, watching her listening to a story from Frankie with a tired smile curling her lips. "With all those dolls?"

"Yes." Maura chuckled. "She still has those." 

"She's grown." Jane moved to wrap her arms around Maura from behind, resting her chin on her wife's shoulder. "She was so shy. She barely talked, remember?"

"I do." Maura smiled and leaned back into her wife's front. She sighed and turned to peck Jane's lips. "There's cake left. Would you like a piece?"

"Yeah, that's the reason I came home."

"Oh, I thought the reason was your daughter." Maura shook her head and grabbed a small plate from the fridge, sticking a fork in the piece of cake and handing it to her wife. "Eat your cake." She smirked and kissed her again.

The family stayed for a few hours longer until Angela noticed Anna getting restless and urged the family to get going, leaving the house quiet and almost empty except for the small Rizzoli-Isles family.

"Moms?" Anna asked quietly, turning on the couch to face her mothers in the kitchen.

"Yeah?"

"Can uhm… Can I ask you something?"

"Of course." Maura smiled lovingly and closed the dishwasher, wiping her hands on a cloth.

"I know-… I know we had plans to go to that restaurant b-but…" Tears sprung to the girls' eyes and she lowered her head.

"Hey…" Jane walked around the couch and kneeled in front of her daughter. "Hey, peanut…"

"Can we just…" Anna's voice was soft and vulnerable, a few small tears trickling down her cheeks, "can we just stay home?"

Jane couldn't help but laugh and wrap her arms around the beautiful girl in front of her for a squeezing hug. "We don't have to go anywhere, baby. It's your day. It's all up to you."

"I want to stay home." Anna's breath hitched in her throat and she wiped her cheeks with the sleeve of her shirt when she pulled back from the hug.

"Then we stay home!" Maura leaned over the back of the couch to kiss the top of Anna's head, placing her hands on her daughter's chest. "What do you want for dinner, baby?"

"I don't care." Anna shrugged.

"Can I pick?" Lily bounced on her knees behind the coffee table where she was working on a few math assignments.

"It's Anna's birthday, honey." Maura straightened her back.

"Anna," Lily whispered, "pick chicken nuggets, okay? I want chicken nuggets!"

"Chicken nuggets are fine." Anna chuckled. "But can we also have that pasta thing with tomatoes?"

"Pasta and chicken nuggets?" Maura furrowed her brow. "We'll have to order from two different places!"

"Just pasta's also fine." Lily waved her hand. "Anna can pick."

Jane chuckled and stood up from kneeling in front of the couch. "The pasta thing it is."

"I'll order something." Maura grabbed her phone and called in the order. When she finished she sighed and patted Anna's shoulder. "Presents?"

"Yeah." Anna smiled gratefully and watched her mother grabbing out a bag from the closet.

Jane sat down next to her daughter and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. "We listened to your request, but we also kind of didn't."

Anna chuckled. "What do you mean?"

"Well…" Jane sighed and thought back to a few days ago when Anna came into their bedroom.

" _Mom? Ma?"_

" _Hm?" Jane untangled herself from her wife and looked up to see Anna standing in the doorway._

" _I-… I've been thinking about my birthday."_

" _And…?" Maura sat up and smiled at her daughter who got out a piece of paper she apparently just printed out on the computer._

" _Well…" Anna sighed and sat down on the edge of the bed next to Maura. "I found this. It's this charity that works on human trafficking. It's a huge problem and they can't fix it but they saved a lot of women and they offer shelter and stuff, and they even helped to arrest a few pigs that did those awful things." She fumbled with the paper that contained information about the charity. "So I thought-… Maybe instead of buying me presents you can help me give money to them?" She looked up at her mothers with her wide eyes sparkling. "It doesn't have to be much… Just… Anything is helpful, I think."_

 _Maura had tears in her eyes when she wrapped her arm around Anna's shoulders and pressed her lips against her temple._

" _That's a beautiful idea, peanut," Jane said softly, blinking her tears away._

" _I already saved up some of my own allowance money."_

 _Maura wrapped her arms around the girl and pressed a few kisses on her cheek. "You are a beautiful person," she whispered. "I love you."_

 _Anna chuckled in disbelief, but her smile fell when she took a deep breath. "I just don't want anymore people to end up like my mother," she whispered. "And I want to help that even if it's just a tiny bit."_

 _Jane swallowed and leaned forward to kiss her daughter's forehead._

" _B-but…" Anna smiled shyly, "I'd still really like that book? The one I told you about?" She looked at Maura with wide eyes as she fumbled with her sweater._

 _Maura chuckled and nodded her head. "Don't tell anyone," she whispered in Anna's ear, "but I already got that for you."_

"It's not really a surprise anymore," Maura walked towards Anna and handed her a package that was clearly a book. "But here you go. Happy birthday, sweetheart."

"Thanks, Mom." Anna carefully ripped off the paper and took out the book, smiling a bright smile. She jumped up from the couch and wrapped her arm around Maura's neck, pressing a hard kiss on her cheek. "Thank you."

Maura chuckled. "You're welcome."

"My turn!" Lily jumped up and looked through the bag at Maura's feet. Her hair was tied up into a ponytail again and Jane smiled at the small, barely visible hearing aids. They helped her so much. She was still tired and school days exhausted her, but she was doing so much better.

"Here." Lily handed Anna a small package, wrapped up in gold wrapping paper. "I picked it out myself."

Anna smiled and carefully unwrapped the gift, taking out a small, silver necklace. She gasped as she held it up and studied it. There were four rings attached to it; two big ones and two smaller ones.

"See? There are four 'cause there are four of us. Mama and Mommy are the big ones and we're the small ones. See?" Lily smiled excitedly as she stood next to her sister.

Anna nodded. She leaned forward and wrapped one of her arms around her sister for a sweet hug. "Thanks, Lil."

Jane felt tears in her eyes as she witnessed her two daughters, different like day and night and yet so loving. Anna pulled back and handed the necklace to Maura. "Can you put it on, please?"

Maura blinked her tears away and moved Anna's hair to put on the necklace, Anna traced it with her fingers. "It looks beautiful, honey," Maura kissed the back of Anna's head and nodded at Jane.

"My turn," Jane grabbed the envelope from the table. "Happy birthday, peanut."

Anna smiled an exciting smile and opened the envelope. Her smile fell. She furrowed her brow and her mouth fell open. "Wh-… H-… How…"

"Remember how we once told you about the Isles Foundation?" Jane brushed Anna's hair back and smiled. "Your grandparents from Mom's side have a lot of money and Mom called your Grandpa Isles and he was touched by your story. So they wanted to make a donation. We put our money with that, and Grandma Angela pitched in too."

Anna had tears in her eyes. "This is amazing."

"Who's Grandpa Isles?" Lily furrowed her brow.

"Oh you met him once at my birthday a while ago, remember?" Maura tucked a strand of hair into Lily's ponytail, a sad smile curling her lips. It hurt her that she lost touch with her parents. They had visited her on her birthday when they happened to be in the country but they left for France the next day. Their daughters probably wouldn't even recognize them if they saw them on the street. "When we went to that small French restaurant?"

"Ugh, that fancy place?" Lily stuck out her tongue, eliciting a glare from Maura. "Yeah, I remember him."

"That's my father. Your grandfather."

While Jane witnessed the conversation between Maura and Lily, she felt two small arms wrapping around her neck and squeezing hard. She smiled and pulled Anna in for a hug as the girl sighed deeply. "Thanks, Ma," she whispered. "This is the best birthday gift."

"We're not finished." Jane smirked and pulled her daughter up from the couch. "There's one more gift in the yoga room."

The small yoga room had been partially turned into a gym for Jane and then when the girls came had its own corner for a playroom so technically it wasn't a yoga room anymore and the calmness of it wasn't quite the same but Maura didn't seem to mind. It only got better. Jane took Anna's hand and opened the door.

Anna squealed. "Oh my gosh! Is that for me?" She smiled brightly and walked towards a large, old chair in the corner of the room. "That's that reading chair I showed you!"

"I know." Jane smirked and took off the bow on top of the chair. "You told me how perfect it would be and I could just see you reading in there."

Anna hopped into the chair, almost disappearing into the soft fabric. She kicked off her shoes and tucked up her feet, leaning sideways into the armrest. The headrests were high and large, the light blue stripes on the fabric making it look authentic. "That was so long ago, though," Anna said, looking up at her mother.

Jane shrugged. "I remembered."

Anna hopped back out of the chair and wrapped her arms around her mother. "Thank you. This is the best birthday ever."

"Hey, now you can read all those new books in there!" Lily chuckled as she walked into the room. "Y'know Mama, she got like ten new books today."

"She did?" Jane smiled and brushed her fingers through the girl's familiar curls.

"Yeah, from Grandma, Uncle Tommy, Uncle Korsak, but I think that's a boring book 'cause it's so old-…"

"It's not, it's supposed to be very good." Anna sat back down in her chair, bouncing up and down as if to test it.

Maura came in and smiled at the sight. "I guess Mama made a good choice, didn't she?"

"Yeah." Anna nodded, smiling a sweet smile up at her mothers.

Jane swallowed as her daughter's genuine smile and beauty overwhelmed her. Her grey eyes were sparkling, her long blond hair curling around her shoulders. She was wearing a light blue shirt that made her eyes stand out and her cheeks were rosy and pink, her nose covered with a few small freckles. Jane couldn't believe her daughter was thirteen. She looked younger but at the same time she had a special kind of maturity in her. Anyone could tell Anna was special.

The doorbell rang and pulled Jane out of her thoughts. "I guess dinner's here."

"That was fast."

"What?" Lily didn't hear the doorbell and furrowed her brow.

"The doorbell rang." Maura smiled and caressed Lily's cheek before taking her hand to open the door. Jane followed quickly, wrapping her arm around Anna's shoulders as they walked out of the room.

In the living room, Maura and Lily carried two paper bags filled with food towards the coffee table. "Dinner on the couch, just this once?"

Anna nodded and smiled gratefully. The small family had dinner on the couch while watching TV and as soon as Anna finished her food she grabbed her brand new book and snuggled into Maura's side. Jane smiled and took her place next to Maura, pulling Lily in between her legs while she stared at the television. She kissed her daughter's dark curls, smiling when Lily snuggled against her mother, her dark eyes focused on the cartoon they were watching. She looked to her side and saw Maura smiling at her, her hazel eyes sparkling with love.

She pulled Anna closer into her side and rested her chin on top of the girl's head. "I love you," she whispered, barely audible.

Jane chuckled at their idyllic family moment. She hoped it would never end. "I love you too."


	43. Chapter 43

Chapter 43

Lily walked across the schoolyard, looking for her mother in a sea of people. It was Friday and Maura was waiting for her daughter in front of her car. It was cold outside and she pulled her scarf higher around her neck, crossing her arms to try and stay warm. She was about to sit back in the car with the heat on when she saw her little girl exiting the building.

She chuckled when she saw a large green stain on the girl's jeans, her hair frizzy and a few curls trying to escape her ponytail. She put those jeans on clean that morning. Maura shook her head. It was impossible for the eight-year-old to keep any part of clothing clean for more than a few hours.

She furrowed her brow when a young girl called Lily's name from a few yards away. Lily of course didn't hear it and kept on walking in search of her mother. The girl giggled and nudged a boy that was standing next to her.

"Ohh Liiiily!" She giggled.

"Yo, deaf girl!" The boy, a little older than Lily, put his hands next to his mouth and yelled, making sure not to yell loud enough for Lily to hear him.

Lily kept walking and Maura felt anger burning in the pit of her stomach. She balled her fists and walked towards the children, feeling an intense kind of anger taking over. "Excuse me?"

The boy's smile fell and he looked up at the classy woman in front of him. "Yes?"

"I would like to you stop making fun of my daughter," Maura's voice was strict and firm as she pointed her finger at the boy.

"We didn't-…"

"Oh don't start with me." Maura shook her head. "I heard you making fun of her. Now, just because she has a hearing disability doesn't justify you treating her like that!"

"It's not like she hears it," the girl chuckled under her breath, bringing Maura to her boiling point.

"You listen to me very carefully, young lady," she pointed at the despicable girl and stepped dangerously close, "if you ever do so much as look at my daughter ever again, know that you are in very big trouble."

The girl's cheeks turned pale and her eyes widened at Maura's low, dangerous tone.

"Don't you dare making fun of her ever again!" Maura's eyes spit fire and she crossed her arms. "Understood?"

The girl nodded weakly.

"Understood?!"

"Y-yes."

"Good. Now walk away and don't let me see you ever again."

The children hurried away, leaving Maura baffled by her own response. When did she start looking so much like Jane? When did she get the guts to speak up to people like this? It was the same kind of anger she felt as the day she found out Anna was being teased in school. If people hurt her children, she wanted to hurt them. She couldn't help it.

She closed her eyes and rubbed her forehead, taking a deep breath to calm herself down before turning around to see Lily looking up at her with wide eyes.

"Mom?"

Maura managed a small smile and brushed a curl out of her daughter's face. "Hi, honey. Are you ready to go home?"

Lily nodded but her brow was still furrowed in confusion. "Why were you talking to Tiffany?"

"Her name is Tiffany?"

"Yeah. Why were you talking to her? She's mean."

"I had to straighten a few things out with her." Maura put her hand on Lily's shoulder to lead her towards the car. "Is she ever mean to you?"

Lily shrugged. "Nah. But she and her friends laugh at Anna sometimes."

Maura sighed deeply and strengthened her gentle grip on Lily's shoulder before they passed the street. She didn't want Lily to know they were making fun of her. It would only hurt her. She hoped it would be over now and she scared them away.

It killed her that children were still making fun of her older daughter. Anna deserved so much better. She was proud of the young teenager for taking the highroad and ignoring them, but it still hurt. She pushed the button on her car key to unlock the doors and hurried to sit behind the wheel and turn on the heat, shivering from the cold. "It's getting so cold," she said while turning up the heat.

Lily nodded as she put on her seatbelt. "Yeah, but you're still wearing skirts!"

Maura looked down at her outfit, a white blouse tucked into a black, knee-lengths skirt and her signature heels on her feet. She wore a blazer and her coat along with a scarf, but even those matched her outfit. It made her feel more confident. Her fashionable outfits were a part of her and without it, she felt uncomfortable. But at the same time, she couldn't wait to get home and throw on a pair of Jane's sweatpants and a warm sweater to snuggle up on the couch with her girls. Home was the place where she didn't need the Alexander McQueen skirt or the Jimmy Choo pumps. Home was the place where people loved her with her bare feet, make-up free, old sweaters and her hair in a messy bun.

The drive home was mostly silent, due to the fact that Lily had trouble hearing over the sound of the engine of the car. Her hearing aids were working perfectly for the girl but things like this would always be difficult. Crowded restaurants, loud music and people talking over each other were a few of the things Lily had grown to hate over the past few months.

Arriving home, the house was empty. Jane was working and Anna was still at school so Maura and Lily had the house to themselves. "So, how was your day?" Maura took off her coat and scarf, shivering in the warmth of their home.

"Good, we beat Jim's team at volleyball."

"Volleyball?" Maura furrowed her brow and opened the fridge to get her daughter something to drink.

"Yeah we played in gym class." Lily sat down on one of the chairs at the dinner table, sitting up on her knees.

"Sounds like fun." Maura poured a glass of juice and walked towards the dinner table to put it in front of Lily, sitting next to the girl as she brushed a strand of hair out of her face. "Did you get the results from the math test back yet?"

"Nope." Lily sipped her juice and shook her head at the same time, almost spilling over.

Maura chuckled. "Watch it, baby."

"I think I did good on the test," she said as she put the half empty glass on the table. "You helped me for that one, remember?"

"I do."

Lily shrugged. "You're the smartest so I think I did fine."

Maura chuckled and stood up to wrap her arms around her little girl from behind, kissing the top of her head. "I think you did just fine as well, honey."

Lily smiled proudly and sat up on her knees to wrap her short arms around her mother's neck. "Are you gonna be home for the rest of the day?"

"Yes, I am." Maura smiled and kissed the side of Lily's head. "I'm going to work from home."

"'Kay." Lily smiled contently as she let go and turned back to her juice.

"Do you have any homework?"

Lily pursed her lips and raised her eyebrows. "Maybe."

"Lily." Maura tilted her head.

"Okay yeah I have homework but it's stupid English class."

"I don't care, go get started." Maura ruffled Lily's curls and patted her shoulder. Lily could get so stubborn about her homework. The girl sighed and stood up to grab her backpack and pull out her book.

When Maura went to grab her computer and a stack of reports, the doorbell rang followed by a frantic knock on the front odor. She furrowed her brow and hurried to open the door, seeing Rachel and Morgan standing outside. They were panting, sweating and Morgan was crying.

"My goodness, what's going on?"

"D-dad…" Rachel panted, stumbling inside. "Dad got in an accident, he-…"

Maura furrowed her brow in concern and wrapped her arms around Morgan to pull her into her side, brushing her short dark hair out of her face. The girl was crying uncontrollably; afraid and exhausted. "What happened?"

"He was driving and-…" Rachel took deep, shuttering breath to calm herself down, but she failed. Tears started trickling down her cheeks and she shook her head. "I don't know what happened but someone called me and I don't have a car and the hospital's too far to walk-…"

"Go get in the car." Maura untangled herself from Morgan, grabbed her coat and car keys and pulled Lily up from her chair.

"Thank you." Rachel sighed in relief and hurried outside towards Maura's car in front of the house.

"What's going on?" Lily furrowed her brow and reluctantly followed her mother, not understanding why she was being dragged out of the house all of the sudden.

"Rachel and Morgan's father got into a car accident and we're going to the hospital." Maura locked the front door behind her and opened the car door to help Morgan and Lily into the back of the car.

"Is he okay?"

Maura looked at Rachel who sat next to her in the passenger seat. She didn't know. "Is he?"

Rachel swallowed and bit her lip. "We don't know."

She nodded, turned on the engine and took off towards the hospital she hated so much. The hospital in which she spent too many hours in fear and pain. Whether it was after Jane got injured again at work, Lily's illness a while ago or when her mother got hit by a car… The hospital held bad memories. The only good thing was Lily being born there so she held on to that thought while she drove as quickly as she could to get the girls to their father.

Arriving at the hospital, a nurse told them Craig was in surgery and not doing very well. There was a lot of internal bleeding and a rather bad head wound. Things weren't looking good. Maura sighed and rubbed her forehead. "Thank you."

"Is there anyone else I should call?" the nurse asked, looking at Rachel.

Rachel snapped out of her thoughts and shook her head. "N-no. No we don't have anyone else."

A sting of pain hurt Maura's chest and she put her hand on Rachel's back but the girl shrugged it away. She shook her head and turned around to walk away.

"Rachel!" Maura followed the teenager towards the exit. "Where are you going?" She put her hand on her shoulder when she reached her but Rachel shrugged her away.

"Leave me alone."

"Rachel…" 

"I said leave me alone!" Rachel yelled and ran away, out of the hospital.

Maura had no other choice than to let her go. She couldn't leave Lily and Morgan. She took a deep breath and felt a small hand tugging on her blouse. "Mom?"

She turned and saw Morgan looking up at her with tears streaming down her face, her breath hitching in her throat as she clutched her fists to her stomach. Maura sighed and walked towards the young girl, kneeling in front of her to wrap her arms around her.

Morgan wrapped her own arms around Maura's neck and rested her head on her shoulder, crying tears of pain and fear. "I-is D-Dad gonna die?"

Maura sighed. She wished she could answer that question with a 'no' but she simply couldn't.

"Maura? Maura! Is Dad gonna die?" Morgan pulled back and looked at Maura with wide eyes.

Maura managed a small smile and tucked a strand of brown hair behind Morgan's ear. "Your dad is a very strong man," she said softly. "He's going to do everything he can to stay alive for you two."

Morgan nodded and hid herself back in Maura's arms, fresh tears rolling down her cheeks. Maura reached out her arm towards Lily and gently squeezed her arm, seeing her dark eyes filled with concern. "Would you mind getting my cellphone out of my purse?" she asked softly.

Lily nodded and grabbed her mother's purse, searching through it for the phone. She handed it to her with a sweet smile.

"Thank you, baby." Maura kissed Lily's forehead without breaking the embrace with Morgan before dialing Jane's number to inform her on the latest events.

"Want me to come by to pick Lily up?" Jane asked after Maura told her everything.

Maura looked at Lily and saw the girl impatiently bouncing on her feet as she bit her lip in concern. "Yes, could you?"

"Yeah, I'll be there in fifteen minutes." The sound of keys being grabbed sounded through the phone. "I'll pick up Anna from school afterwards, okay?"

"Thank you."

"Maur?"

"Hm?"

"Are you okay?"

Maura sighed and looked at the crying thirteen-year-old in her arms. "I will be."

Thirty minutes later, Lily was picked up by Jane and Maura sat in the waiting room, holding Morgan in her arms as they anxiously waited for any news as well as for Rachel to come back.

"Maura?" Morgan moved her head to rest it on Maura's shoulder as she fumbled with the sleeve of her sweater. 

"Yes?"

"Where did Rachel go?"

"I don't know, honey." Maura sighed and rested her cheek on top of Morgan's head. "I think she just went out to-…" She stopped talking when Rachel walked around the corner, her arms crossed in front of her chest, her head hanging low.

"Rachel?" Morgan jumped up from her seat and almost knocked her sister over when she ran in for a hug. "Where'd you go?"

Rachel swallowed hard and pulled her sister close. "I just needed some air."

Maura smiled at the young girl. "Still no news," she said softly.

Rachel nodded. She took Morgan's hand and sat down next to Maura, pulling her feet up on the seat as she slowly leaned into her side. Maura smiled and wrapped her arms around her. "Your father is a very strong man, Rachel," she whispered just like she did to Morgan, "he's fighting as hard as he can, I know he is."

"He's all we have, Maura." Rachel's voice was weak and laced with fear. "We don't have anyone else."

"I'm here, honey," she whispered. "We're here."

"Ms. Matthews?" A female doctor walked into the waiting room.

"Yes?" Rachel stood up and nervously straightened her shirt.

The doctor sighed deeply. Not a good sign. "He's out of surgery."

"And?"

"Right now he's still in a coma. It's a matter of time to see if he comes out of it and if he does, we'll have to wait and see how he comes out."

Rachel put her hand over her mouth and nodded her head, fresh tears filling her eyes.

"But is he okay?" Morgan asked, still standing closely next to Maura.

"His vitals are stable, yes."

"That's good, right Maura?"

Maura nodded slightly and caressed Morgan's cheek. Nothing was good. "Yes."

The girls were allowed to see their father but he was nothing more than a hollow shell. Rachel just stood there staring at him and Morgan cried her eyes out, gratefully burying herself in Maura's arms. These girls couldn't lose their father. He was all the family they had left except for a great aunt in Utah. The girls loved their father and Craig loved his girls more than anything in the world.

The reaction coming from Morgan was natural. She cried and feared. But Rachel pushed her feelings away. She didn't allow herself to cry or to fear. She wanted to stay strong. She insisted on taking Morgan to their own house and taking care of themselves but Maura refused. She took the girls home with her where Jane was waiting for them with a delicious take-out dinner.

"Morgan!" Anna jumped up from her seat and hurried towards her friend, wrapping her arms around her for a sweet hug. "Are you okay? Is he okay?"

"He's in a coma," Morgan replied softly. "The doctors don't know if he's ever gonna wake up."

"He will." Anna nodded and smiled at her friend. "He's gonna wake up."

"I don't know, Anna." Morgan wiped a tear away with the back of her hand. "He looked pretty bad."

Anna sighed. "He's gonna be okay," she said softly. "I know it."

"Morgan, Rach, dinner's right here if you want some." Jane waved at them from the kitchen counter. "Maur, you too."

Maura put her coat away and smiled gratefully as she walked towards her wife and wrapped her arms around her waist, leaning into her side while she watched their four girls eating dinner. "Poor girls," she whispered.

Jane sighed and gently lifted Maura's chin to capture her lips in a loving kiss. She pulled back and strengthened the embrace. "What do we do…" Jane hesitated and looked at her wife with concern in her dark eyes, "what if it all goes wrong?"

Maura furrowed her brow and rubbed her hand up and down Jane's side, feeling her muscles under her cotton T-shirt. "I don't know."

"C'mon Maur," Jane whispered, "you've thought about it."

Maura smiled slightly and nodded her head. "Yes."

"They're already kind of our second pair of kids anyway…"

"That's true."

"But four kids is a lot." Jane sighed and looked at the kitchen counter that was now so much more crowded than usual.

"It is." Maura lifted her head from Jane's shoulder and smiled lovingly while she brushed her wife's dark messy curls back. "Let's just take it day by day."

Jane nodded, lifting her hand to stroke Maura's cheek with her fingers. "You did good with them, Maur."

"I'm not sure," Maura sighed and leaned forward into Jane's arms, being able to rest her head on her chest without her usual heels. "Rachel is quite distant."

"She's eighteen," Jane replied quietly. "She probably just needs some space."

Maura nodded. Giving her children space was hard for her. She wanted to be there for them at all times. "Probably, yes."

"They're staying here for the night, right?"

"I suppose, yes. I don't think it's a good idea to leave them at home by themselves right now." Maura tightened her arms around her wife's waist, inhaling the lovely smell of cotton, lavender and her wife. She took a deep breath and looked up at the beautiful brunette in her arms. "I love you," she whispered. "My beautiful detective."


	44. Chapter 44

_A/N Wow, 44 chapters in! I can't believe you are all still here for this story that has gotten very close to my heart. We're in for a rough ride with the girls, but don't worry, there will be fluff and love. Thank you so much for still reading this story and for writing reviews, each and every one of them means the world to me!_

Chapter 44

"How is this fair, Jane?" Rachel lifted her hands and glared at the woman in front of her. "We have nothing left! NOTHING!"

"Rachel-…"

"Don't you dare say we have you!" Rachel pointed angrily at the detective. "You told me that a thousand times and how come I still feel like I'm all alone on the entire planet?!" Tears sprung to Rachel's eyes and lowered her hands. "He died, Jane," she whispered in defeat. "He fought and fought and now he's just gone. He's gone."

Jane felt like a brick dropped in her stomach and her throat closed up with tears. "I know, honey." She carefully stepped forward and tried to touch Rachel's arm but the girl stepped back.

"Just leave me alone."

"Rachel…"

Rachel shook her head, turned around and walked away, leaving Jane helpless and concerned. Craig passed away that night. At 3AM, his body couldn't fight anymore and his heartbeat stopped. The coma lasted two weeks. Two weeks where Morgan and Rachel stayed with Jane and Maura. Two weeks filled with tears and fear, leaving all of them emotionally drained.

Jane just stood there at the parking lot of the hospital, watching Rachel walking away to who knows where. She wanted so badly to be there for the girl but Rachel just wouldn't allow it. She kept walking away. She spent her days at school and her nights in the guestroom. She didn't allow them to hold her or comfort her. She wanted to do it all by herself no matter how many times they told her she shouldn't.

After a few minutes of just standing in the cold, Jane decided to go home. She got in her car and drove off, leaving the hospital full of so many bad memories behind her. She couldn't get rid of the image of Rachel and Morgan crying by their father's bed, Morgan's small hands clutching the blankets on his stomach as Rachel tried to comfort her sister by rubbing her back as tears streamed down her face. She would never forget the sound of Morgan's cries, loud shrieks that pierced through the hospital room. She would never forget the look of utter grief and loneliness on Rachel's face and the amount of pain that showed in Morgan's blue eyes.

Back home, Maura was sitting on the couch with a crying Morgan next to her, her arms wrapped around the girl's shoulders as Morgan's head rested on the blonde's chest. Anna was sitting against Maura's other side. Her cheeks were dry but her eyes were filled with pain and concern as she tried to focus on the movie that was playing on TV. They made the choice to take Lily to school that morning, and Jane liked to think it was a good choice. She needed the distraction. At home she would just be worried.

"Hi." Maura smiled sadly at her wife, lifting her head and pursing her lips to silently ask for a kiss.

"Hi." Jane captured her lips in a sweet kiss before kissing the top of Morgan's head and Anna's forehead. "How are things here?"

Maura just shrugged and pulled Morgan closer, eliciting a sad smile from her wife. "Can I make something to drink?"

"Please."

"Coming right up." Jane headed towards the kitchen and grabbed three glasses to get her family a drink, but she stopped when she felt a cold hand on her arm. She looked to her side and saw Anna looking up at her with tears in her eyes. "You okay, peanut?"

Anna shook her head and reached out her arms for a hug, causing Jane to swallow a lump in her throat and lift the girl off the floor into her arms. Anna's long legs wrapped around her mother's waist and her arms around Jane's neck. She was getting too tall and heavy to carry like this but Jane didn't care. She still fitted in her arms, curling up in the embrace as she cried softly.

The amount of grief and pain in the atmosphere was just too much for her to handle. Jane placed her hand on the back of Anna's head, her other arm holding the girl up as she kissed her daughter's temple. "I'm here, baby," she whispered. "Shh, Mama's here."

Anna just nodded weakly against her mother, her arms still squeezing around Jane's neck as she cried. "H-he died, Mama," she whispered through her tears.

"I know, honey." Jane gently rocked her daughter back and forth, feeling the weight straining her legs so she sat down at the dinner table, taking Anna in her lap. She pulled her head to her chest and placed kisses on top of Anna's head as she pulled her impossibly closer.

She waited until Anna's rapid breaths calmed down and her tears stopped streaming. She waited until the girl stopped shaking and her tight grip on her mother's jacket loosened. "It's so unfair," Anna whispered, her voice hoarse with tears.

"I know. So unfair."

"I don't know what to do, Ma." Anna adjusted herself and snuggled closer against her mother. "I want to help but I don't know what to do."

Jane sighed deeply. "You know what? Me neither." She smiled sadly and rubbed her daughter's back. "I wish I knew what to do but I don't."

Anna sighed and seemed relieved to hear that her mother had the same doubts. "Why did this happen?" she asked softly. "First their mom goes to prison and now their dad died… That's just-… I don't know. I don't understand why so many bad things happen to them."

"No one understands, baby." Jane rested her cheek against Anna's forehead on her shoulder as she looked at Maura and Morgan in the living room. Morgan sat curled up against Maura's side, still crying uncontrollably. "Life just gets unfair."

Anna nodded. "Stupid life."

"That's right. Stupid life."

Anna wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand and sniffled. "Are they gonna stay here?"

Jane sighed at the inevitable question. She didn't know. She wanted so badly to take Rachel and Morgan into their home and give them the love and care they deserved but she didn't know if that was the best solution for the girls. "For now, yeah."

"Forever?"

"We don't know yet. We want what's best for them."

"Don't you think it's good for them to stay here?" Anna lifted her head and looked at her mother with questioning eyes.

Jane smiled and wiped a few tears from Anna's cheek. "I do."

"I think so too." Anna nodded and rested her head back on Jane's shoulder, snuggling closer.

Jane sighed and looked over Anna's head at the living room, seeing Morgan changing her position to lie on the couch with her head in Maura's lap, Maura's hands comfortingly stroking her head.

"Jane," Maura turned her head to look at her wife at the dinner table, "where's Rachel?"

"I don't know." Jane bit her lip to try and stop her tears from filling her eyes. "Taking her space, I guess."

Maura sighed, nodded her head and turned back to the crying girl in her lap, whispering soothing words of comfort.

They stayed like that for a long time. Morgan eventually cried herself to sleep, her skinny body completely drained by the pain and fear of that night. Anna just stayed in her place, occasionally crying tears of grief.

Suddenly the front door opened and Rachel appeared. Her face was paler than ever and her eyes were swollen and bloodshot from crying. Jane lifted her head but she was too afraid to initiate any contact. Maura seemed to be feeling the same and just gently lifted Morgan's head off her lap before standing up from the couch.

Rachel shook her head. "I-…" She took a deep, shuttering breath and leaned back against the front door, resting her head back against it as she closed her eyes. She shook her head again and balled her fists next to her sides before bringing them up to her temples and rubbing hard.

"Rachel…" Maura whispered, carefully stepping closer.

"No," Rachel whispered hoarsely. "N-no."

Jane carefully lifted Anna from her lap, kissing her forehead as she put her on her seat and stood up. She looked at Maura and saw streaks of tears on her freckled cheeks while she looked at the aching teenager against the front door.

Rachel's bottom lip quivered and she turned around to rest her forehead against the wall next to the door. She brought up her fists and started banging the wall before letting out a heartbreaking scream. "NO!"

"Rachel, my sweet girl…" Maura put her hand on her chest and looked at the girl with tears in her eyes.

As the banging got louder, so got Rachel's screams. She sobbed and sobbed and Jane decided it was enough. "Rachel, you're hurting yourself. C'mon, honey."

"LEAVE ME ALONE!"

Jane straightened her back and wiped a tear from her cheek. "No. I won't leave you alone."

"I SAID-…"

"NO!" Jane turned and grabbed Rachel's hands to stop her from banging the wall and injuring herself. "I'm not leaving you alone!"

For a split second, Rachel was stunned but Jane's outburst. For a split second, her tears stopped and she stood completely still. When the second was over, she collapsed. Her knees buckled and she fell to the floor with a heartbreaking sob.

Jane caught her. She sat on the floor because the girl was too heavy to keep up and she pulled her as close as humanly possible, Rachel's hands clinging desperately to anything to hold on to.

The loud noises woke Morgan up and she was sitting up on the couch with Anna by her side, both girls sweetly holding hands as Anna tried her best to comfort her friend in any way she could.

Jane wondered how they ended up here. Comforting one girl after another, cheerful chatter in the house suddenly replaced by angry screams and heartbreaking sobs. Anna was right. Life was stupid and unfair.

Rachel cried for what felt like hours. There was no end to her tears. She cried, screamed, whispered, and cried some more. When she finally reached the point of numbness, the point of just curling up into a ball with no more tears left, the pain too much to handle, Jane helped her up from the floor and gently made her lie down on the couch.

Anna and Morgan made place for the crying girl and Morgan kneeled in front of her sister who was lying on her side on the couch, her knees hugged to her chest. "Rachel…"

Rachel let out a dry sob and reached out her shaking hand, taking Morgan's hand in hers. She tried to smile through her tears but she failed and just held Morgan's hand. Morgan sat down on the floor and rested her head next to Rachel's, silent tears trickling down her cheeks as she closed her eyes and tried to fight the pain from tearing her apart.

Jane didn't even notice she was crying until she felt a few tears falling down her face. She wiped them away and saw Anna standing up, walking away from the crying sisters to stand in between her mothers. The women wrapped her arms around their daughter and Maura kissed the top of her head.

The hours went by without anyone really noticing. Maura made soup for dinner but Rachel only ate a small amount of it. Morgan managed a smile when Lily told a joke but her eyes didn't participate. Lily was quiet and Anna couldn't stop crying whenever Rachel or Morgan cried. The great aunt from Utah called but that was it. Rachel was being texted by friends throughout the day but she read none of them. Jane just wanted to desperately to protect her family from this immense pain but she couldn't. All she could do was wipe their tears and hold them close as they ached.

When all four girls were finally asleep, Rachel and Morgan in the same bed in the guestroom, Anna in her mothers' bed and Lily on the couch, Maura and Jane found themselves in the kitchen with no clue what to say or do.

"I just can't cry anymore," Jane whispered, resting her head back against the fridge.

Maura shook her head. "Me neither."

"It kills me, Maur." Jane looked at her wife. "This. I-… I can't…"

"You can." Maura nodded and stepped closer to take Jane's hands in hers, squeezing them gently. "My love."

"It's not fair," Jane softly repeated her daughter's words from earlier and Rachel's words from that morning. Nothing was fair.

Maura shook her head and pulled Jane away from the fridge to wrap her arms around her waist for a loving hug. "They're our girls, Jane," she whispered. "I'm not letting them go."

Jane swallowed and pressed her lips against her wife's temple. She knew Maura wanted to take them in. She knew Maura wanted nothing more than to give these girls the home they needed. "We need to do what's best for them, Maur."

"We are what's best for them." Maura pulled away from Jane to look at her. "We can offer them stability and warmth. We can offer them a family."

"I want to know what they want," Jane shrugged.

"Of course."

"Rachel will be off to college soon in like six months."

"It will be tough." Maura moved her hands up and down Jane's arms.

Jane nodded. "I know." She sighed and pulled Maura closer, resting her forehead against hers. "I love you. And them. All of them."

Maura smiled the first genuine smile of that day and kissed Jane's lips. "I love you too. All of you."

Jane was about to deepen the kiss when a heartbreaking sob sounded from upstairs. Both women sighed deeply. "That's Morgan."

"I'll go." Maura pecked her wife's lips and turned around to head upstairs.

"I'll lock up for the night." Jane closed her eyes to compose herself for a few seconds before locking the front and back door and gently brushing her hand through Lily's dark curls. "C'mon, baby. You gotta sleep in your bed."

Lily groaned in her sleep while Jane lifted her in her arms to carry her to her own bed, wanting her children as close as possible and knowing Lily wouldn't sleep well on the couch in the living room. She gently put her daughter to bed, covering her in blankets and putting her favorite stuffed animal by her side before pressing a kiss on her forehead. "Sleep well, baby girl," she whispered to her sleeping daughter.

"Everything will be okay." She sighed deeply and caressed Lily's cheek, looking at her dark eyelashes fluttering with the dream she had. "I know it's gonna be okay. I just don't know how and that kills me. But I know it'll be okay. We just got to remember that, okay?" She smiled and kissed her daughter's temple for a last time before standing up from the edge of the bed. "Somehow, it will all be okay."


	45. Chapter 45

Chapter 45

There was laundry everywhere. Dirty dishes were piling up in the kitchen and pieces of leftover food were slowly starting to smell. Maura stepped over a pair of jeans and looked at the teenager in the kitchen. "You need to do some laundry, honey."

"Hm." Rachel shrugged and lowered a teabag in a mug with steaming hot water. She handed it to Maura without making eye contact.

"Thank you." Maura tried took into Rachel's eyes but the girl turned away to make herself a cup of tea. She had been spending the past few days in her father's house, hiding away from the world and the people that loved her. "Rachel…"

"Why did you come here?" Rachel turned around and looked straight into Maura's eyes.

Stunned by the question, Maura opened her mouth without speaking, unable to find a reply.

"Did you come here to check on me?"

"No," Maura whispered, still stunned.

"Then why?"

"I-… I want to make sure you're okay," Maura shrugged her shoulders and managed a small smile. "I care about you, Rachel. I don't want you to be alone."

"What if I want to be alone?" Rachel leaned back against the kitchen counter and crossed her arms.

Maura sighed deeply. "Then that's okay. But you have to let people take care of you."

"I don't need anyone, I'm fine."

Maura didn't reply. Rachel was far from fine. The dark circles under her swollen eyes indicated that she wasn't sleeping and spent most her nights crying. The pizza boxes told Maura that she wasn't eating anything nutritious and the lack of light in the house meant she was literally living in the dark.

"I'm fine. I'm eighteen, I can take care of myself." Rachel straightened her back. "I'm just busy with the funeral, y'know? I don't know what flowers he liked and-… But I'm fine. I-… I'm fine."

Maura just raised her eyebrows.

"I'm fine!"

Maura sighed and put her mug on the counter next to her. "Well, Morgan isn't."

This got Rachel's attention. "She's not?"

Maura shook her head. "She misses you."

Sudden tears sprung to Rachel's eyes and she quickly blinked them away. "She has you and Jane. And Anna and Lily."

"She wants _you_ , Rachel," Maura whispered. "She needs her sister."

Rachel just swallowed and lowered her head without replying.

Maura took a deep breath and steadied herself to say what she came for. "You're hiding, Rachel," she said softly. "And you can't hide forever. Someday you'll need to open the windows and let in some light. And I don't just mean the windows of this house." She looked at the closed curtains and smelled the smell of a place that hasn't known fresh air for a while. "At some point you'll have to open the windows of your heart and let people love you."

Rachel shook her head.

"Yes, honey. You have to allow people to comfort you." Maura sighed and carefully stepped closer towards her. "You have to let people love you, Rachel."

"There's no one left, Maura," Rachel whispered, still looking down at her feet.

Maura swallowed and stepped a few inches closer. "You really think there is no one left that loves you?"

"No-… I mean… Yeah Morgan but she's my little sister. I-…"

"I love you, Rachel." Maura carefully reached up and tucked a strand of long dark hair behind Rachel's ear, happy to see her accepting it. "Don't ever doubt that."

Rachel looked up at Maura with tears in her eyes. "I'm not even your family."

"You are. You don't have to be blood related to be family."

Rachel nodded weakly and lowered her head again. "I can't." she whispered, barely audible.

Maura sighed deeply. "You have to stop trying to do it by yourself, honey. You have to start letting people in."

"I don't know what to do, Maura," Rachel whispered, a single tear trickling down her cheek. "I feel so angry inside."

Tears filled Maura's eyes and she just nodded. She was too afraid to scare Rachel off again by saying the wrong thing so she stayed quiet.

"I just feel like I'm all alone," Rachel raised her shoulders up to her ears, her arms wrapping around herself. "I can't sleep, I can't eat… When the night comes I can only cry and I'm so tired…" Rachel's breath hitched in her throat and she wiped her tears with the back of her hand. "I can't anymore, Maura." She lifted her head and looked at the woman next to her with tears in her eyes. "I just can't."

Maura nodded her head and couldn't resist any longer. She wrapped her arms around the slightly taller girl and pulled her in for a squeezing hug. "You can, sweetheart. I know you can."

Rachel let out a heartbreaking sob and wrapped her own arms around the blonde, her tears falling on Maura's shoulder. "I miss him so much," she whispered hoarsely. "I just want him back."

"I know."

"Everything's empty without him." Rachel took a deep shuttering breath. "I want my dad, Maura."

Maura just nodded and pulled the crying girl impossibly closer. Her sobs were breaking her heart but she was grateful to finally see some tears and to finally be able to hug her and comfort her. They stayed in the same position for a long time, Maura whispering soothing words of comfort while Rachel cried and cried.

When she finally calmed down, she pulled back, smiled a shy smile and wiped her cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. She grabbed a paper towel, blew her nose and took a deep breath to calm herself down. "Can-… Can you help me with the laundry? I can't get the machine to work."

Maura chuckled. "Of course." She grabbed a towel from the sink and a sweater from the back of a chair. "Are you coming over for dinner tonight?"

Rachel grabbed a pair of socks from the floor and stopped in her tracks, causing Maura to fear for a second. Did she go too far? But Rachel shrugged and smiled slightly. "Okay."

"Good." Maura smiled in relief.

"About that…" Rachel sighed and threw the socks in the laundry bin Maura had grabbed from a corner of the room. "What's gonna happen to us?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean-… Is Morgan going to stay with you? And… What about me?"

"Well…" Maura smiled and put a dirty cloth with the laundry. "For now, Morgan is staying with us. We have temporary guardianship to avoid her going into foster care. As for you… You're eighteen. Legally, you're allowed to take care of yourself."

"Not a great success so far," Rachel said as she motioned around the messy house.

"Jane and I decided to leave it up to you," Maura said softly. "Know that you are more than welcome. You know we have a room set up for you and you know we love you as one of our own. So…" she sighed and smiled at the girl in front of her. "It's your choice."

Rachel nodded. She didn't reply and continued finding dirty laundry in silence. Maura feared but didn't ask any questions. They quickly concluded that the washing machine was broken so Maura insisted on taking the laundry with her to do it at home. She was about to say goodbye when Rachel stopped her.

"Wait-…"

"Hm?" Maura turned around and saw Rachel hurrying towards the couch and grabbing a large bag. She frantically started pushing sweatshirts and jeans into it before hurrying towards her bedroom and the bathroom to grab everything she needed.

Once the bag was filled, she hurried back to Maura, panting. "I'm ready."

Maura nodded her head, placed her hand on the back of Rachel's head and pulled her down to kiss her forehead. "Let's go home."

As soon as Maura opened the front door and Morgan saw her sister, she jumped off the couch to run towards her, almost knocking her over as she hugged her tight. "Rachel!"

Rachel dropped her bag and gratefully hugged her sister. "I'm sorry, Morgan."

"Where'd you go?"

Rachel shrugged. "I was being stupid."

Maura smiled and wrapped her arms around Jane who was watching them from behind the couch. "Hi, love."

"Hi." Jane captured her lips in a quick but loving kiss and put her arm around her wife's shoulders. "She okay?"

Maura sighed. "I'm not sure."

"Are you gonna stay here?" Morgan asked, pulling away to look up at her sister.

Rachel looked over Morgan's head at Maura and smiled when Maura nodded at her. "Yeah," she answered. "Yeah I'm staying."

"She will be okay." Jane kissed Maura's temple and pulled her closer. "Eventually."

"She will." Maura kissed her wife again before pulling away to walk towards the dinner table where Anna and Lily were playing a game together. "Hi, babies." She kissed the top of Lily's head and caressed Anna's cheek. "How are you?"

"Good, I beat Anna twice already." Lily grinned up at her mother, her dark curls framing her beautiful face.

"Impressive." Maura chuckled and stepped towards her older daughter to wrap her arms around her from behind, resting her hands on the girl's stomach. "How are you, pretty girl?"

Anna shrugged. "Tired. But I got an A minus om my calculus test."

"Oh, that's great. I'm proud of you." Maura rested her cheek against Anna's temple from behind. "Would you like to help me make lasagna tonight?"

"Yeah." Anna smiled, grateful for some time with her mother.

"Okay." She kissed her daughter's temple and straightened her back to head back to the living room where Rachel and Morgan were sitting in one of the chairs together, Morgan talking softly about something.

"Maura? Jane?" Morgan turned away from her sister to look at the women in the living room.

"Yes?"

"Are you coming to the funeral on Thursday?"

"Of course!" Jane sat down on the couch and put her feet up on the table. "We wouldn't let you go all by yourselves."

Morgan sighed in relief. "Okay. Good."

"Oh Rach, your room is all set up. We got you the one downstairs but we can clear the extra study room upstairs if you'd rather have that one." Jane took a sip of her coffee and smiled warmly at the teenager. "The downstairs room is bigger though."

Rachel chuckled softly. "Downstairs is fine. I'll put my stuff away." She stood up and walked past the couch when Maura stopped her by grabbing her arm.

"I'm happy you're here," she whispered.

"Yeah." Rachel nodded and smiled shyly. "Me too."

"I bought you shampoo, conditioner and that coconut wash you like. It's in your room."

"Thanks." Rachel looked into Maura's eyes and Maura knew she wasn't just thanking her for the shampoo. It was a deeper kind of gratitude and Maura replied to it with a squeeze on Rachel's arm.

She sat next to her wife and leaned into her side, placing her hand on Jane's upper leg. "How was your day? Did you go to work this afternoon?"

Jane shook her head. "No." She looked at Morgan and sighed. "She came to me crying."

"Poor thing."

"Got the team on the right track though," Jane smirked and took Maura's hand in hers. "I just hope they get that bastard by the end of the night."

"They will." Maura kissed her wife and pulled back to see Morgan standing up from her chair, fumbling with her shirt as she looked around the room. Anna and Lily were still playing their game, Lily furiously trying to beat Anna again but failing miserably.

"C'mere, baby," Jane whispered, reaching out her arm towards the thirteen-year-old.

Morgan smiled gratefully and sat on the couch, leaning into Jane's side. "Is Rachel going to live here too?"

Maura furrowed her brow, the question indicating that Morgan was convinced she would be living with them from now on. "We… we don't know yet, honey."

"I want her to."

"So do we." Jane kissed the top of Morgan's head and brushed her short dark hair back.

"But she's going to college at the end of the school year."

"Yeah."

Morgan sighed and tucked her feet up on the couch. "Can… Can I still stay here when Rachel's at college?"

Jane chuckled and Maura reached over her wife to caress Morgan's cheek. "Yes, honey. Always."

After a short moment of silence, Anna joined them on the couch, telling Morgan something about the game that made her laugh. A real laugh. A short while later Lily joined them as well, snuggling into Maura's side while she watched a cartoon on her mother's iPad. It only took a few more minutes for Rachel to join them as well, kicking off her shoes and sitting sideways in a chair while she grabbed her phone and went through whatever social media she went through.

Maura smiled to herself, kissed Lily's temple and rested her head on Jane's shoulder, feeling her wife pressing her lips against her forehead. "Lots of kids, huh?" she whispered.

Maura looked around the living room and couldn't help but smile. Yes, there were a lot of kids in the room. And at some moments, she knew it would feel like too many. But Rachel and Morgan deserved a home. They deserved to be loved and have a family. Four girls were a lot but Maura knew she loved those four girls with all she had.


	46. Chapter 46

Chapter 46

The church was filled with people. Everyone was silently listening to the man that was speaking about Craig. They read from the bible, they listened to music and endless speeches about the wonderful person that was Craig Matthews. A white coffin stood in the front with a picture on it to remind everyone of Craig's smile.

Morgan's smaller hand was resting in Maura's hands, the girl sitting closely against her side as she tried to get through this service. She was trying desperately not to cry and she kept squeezing Maura's hand and averting her attention to distract herself from the tears in her eyes. Rachel sat on Morgan's other side and just stared into the distance, showing no emotion whatsoever. Maura knew there was a storm of emotions going on inside the girl and she knew all those emotions would flood as soon as this was all over.

On the other side Jane was rubbing her thumb over Anna's knuckles to keep her calm and comfortable while Lily sat at the aisle and was quickly becoming restless. Lily looked beautiful in a black dress but she was fidgeting with it throughout the speech.

The man in front of the church finished his speech and left the stage to make place for a priest that would say a few words before it would be Rachel's turn to speak. Maura looked over Morgan's head and saw Rachel's jaw flexing and her hands trembling. She smiled reassuringly and reached over to squeeze her hand.

Rachel looked at the woman and furrowed her brow in fear. "I can't do this, Maura," she whispered.

Maura nodded. "You can, honey. We're all here."

Rachel shook her head. "No."

"It's your choice, sweetheart."

Rachel took a deep breath and nodded, thinking about her choice while she focused back on the priest.

He was talking about heaven and living a good life. All things that would offer little to less comfort to the girls that lost their only parent. Morgan took another deep breath to try and hide her tears. Maura took the girl's hands back in hers and squeezed them lovingly. Morgan looked up at the woman, tears shimmering in her blue eyes.

"It's almost over, sweetheart," Maura whispered while she tucked a strand of dark hair back into the clip on the side of the girl's head.

Morgan just nodded and leaned into Maura's side, trying so desperately to hide herself from all that happened around her. Maura lifted her arm to wrap around the girl's shoulders, eliciting a smile from a woman on the other side. Probably a wife from one of the men that worked at the car shop. The church was filled with mostly colleagues and friends. The girls didn't have much family.

When the priest finished his boring speech, the church stayed silent and Maura held her breath in anticipation of what Rachel would do. She gently squeezed the girl's arm and looked at her one last time before she finally stood up and slowly walked towards the front, fumbling with a small piece of paper. Her hands were shaking and she took a deep, shuttering breath when she reached the microphone.

"I-… M-…" Rachel sighed again and shook her head to compose herself. She took another breath and her expression turned to stone. She straightened her back, pushed her shoulders back and lifted her chin. She crumbled up the paper in her hands. "My father was an amazing man. He's the strongest man I will ever know and he was the one to make us feel safe and loved all our lives. It's unfair that he's gone. Life sucks." Rachel shrugged her shoulders. "Life sucks big time. My dad was a good man. He did everything he could to live a good life."

Maura felt Morgan's hand squeezing hers almost painfully hard while she listened intently to her sister.

"It's unfair that he's gone," Rachel continued her expression still cold as ice, "I don't get it. I don't understand a God that rips someone away from life like that. I don't understand a single thing about anything right now. All I know is that God took away the one man that gave a crap about me and Morgan," a quiet gasp sounded through the church when she used the word 'crap', but she didn't react. "All I know is that even though I don't understand that God, I thank Him for Jane and Maura," she looked at Maura who had tears in her eyes and then at Jane who was desperately trying to keep it together, "for giving us the family we need. And…" She sighed and the first sign of emotion crossed her face. Pain. "All I know is that this wonderful, amazing and strong man is ripped away from the world. And the world has become worse for it."

She nodded her head and walked back to her place, sitting down next to her sister. The crowd was basically stunned. Everyone was quiet, blinking their eyes a few times to process the things Rachel just said. Jane was grinning proudly and Maura was just concerned about the young girl. She gently took her arm and raised her eyebrows. "Are you okay?" 

Rachel nodded. "Yeah. Fine."

Maura sighed. She would have to take her word for it because it was time to leave the church and head to the cemetery to bury Craig. The hardest part. Maura felt Morgan's cold hand grabbing hers as the crowd of people stood up and waited for the family to exit the church first.

For a split second, Maura was unsure of what to do. They weren't officially part of the Matthews family. But Morgan was gripping her hand so tightly there was no way she was letting the girls go by themselves. She looked at Jane and Jane nodded. "Go," she whispered.

She squeezed Morgan's hand and watched Jane taking Rachel's arm, the girl surprisingly enough accepting the gesture as they walked out of the church, followed by Anna and Lily as they felt dozens of eyes focused on them.

Outside, Morgan visibly relaxed. She breathed in the fresh air as they walked to the cemetery. What she didn't know was that the hardest part was just about to begin.

The white coffin stood in sharp contrast to the black dirt and green grass around them. The sky was grey and they felt a few drops of rain starting to come down. The priest said a few words, the coffin was lowered into the large hole, people put flowers at the fresh grave and Morgan and Rachel just stood there. They didn't even realize what happened around them. They only looked at the coffin in the ground while Morgan cried and Rachel stared. The world was numb for them. The sound of the quiet chatter was just a buzz in the back of their minds. They didn't even feel the small raindrops.

"Are you Jane and Maura?" A short man stood behind the Rizzoli-Isles family and touched Maura's shoulder.

"We are." Maura tore her attention away from the girls at the grave to look at the unfamiliar dark-skinned man.

He smiled politely. "My name's Neil," he said while she shook Jane's hand and then Maura's. "I worked with Craig."

"Nice to meet you." Jane wrapped her arm back around Anna's shoulders.

"I heard you're taking them?" He motioned at Rachel and Morgan.

"Well, no final decision has been made," Maura replied, "but they are staying with us for now, yes."

Neil nodded and looked at the girls. "They're good with you."

Maura smiled and followed him by looking back at the grave, seeing Morgan leaning into Rachel's front as the older girl's arms were wrapped around her sister's chest. She didn't want to think about where those girls would end up if they didn't have Jane and Maura.

"You just gotta love 'em as much as Craig did," he added after a short moment of silence, "'cause he loved his girls real damn much, y'know?"

"Yeah," Jane moved her hand up and down Anna's arm and looked at the grave. "We will."

Before Maura could reply, Neil was gone and so were most of the people that attended. After a few more moments the cemetery was empty except for Rachel and Morgan and the small family.

The rain was slowly starting to come down harder and Maura saw Morgan shivering from where she was standing. Maura tore herself away from Lily in front of her and slowly headed towards the girls. She stood still next to them, trying not to look at the grave next to her. The raindrops were loudly dripping on the coffin and the sky only got darker and darker.

Heavy tears were streaming down Morgan's face as she stared at the grave, her hands resting on top of Rachel's on her chest. Rachel just stared, her expression blank, her eyes screaming pain. Maura carefully reached out and caressed Morgan's wet cheek with the back of her hand. The girl shot her attention towards her, looking up with those bright blue eyes that were bloodshot with tears. She sobbed and reached out her arms, eliciting a similar sob from Maura as she took the girl in her arms.

She looked over Morgan's head at the grave that now contained the man that used to be the most important person in the girls' lives. The man that helped bring those beautiful girls into the world. The man that protected them from their mother and the man that loved them endlessly and unconditionally. That man was now gone, for good. And Maura could feel the sense of utter loss in the girl in her arms. She felt it in the way Morgan clutched to her coat, the way her shoulders shook and her sobs sounded over the rain. She saw it in her eyes. Her eyes were the worst. They were filled with a kind of pain no thirteen-year-old should ever experience.

"We should go home," she whispered through her tears, brushing a strand of wet hair out of Morgan's face.

Morgan nodded and turned in Maura's arms to look at the grave one last time. She took a deep breath and walked towards the edge, kneeling down in front of it. "Bye, daddy."

Maura clutched her hand to her chest and held back a sob when she watched the girl lowering her head, whispering a few quiet words before standing back up and turning her back on the open grave.

"Are you ready?" Maura asked quietly, cupping Morgan's cheek.

Morgan nodded. She took Maura's arm and allowed Anna to take her other arm. Maura was about to turn around when she saw Jane walking towards Rachel, placing her hand on the girl's arm. Rachel shook her head. Maura couldn't hear what was being said but she saw Jane nodding and motioning towards the sky that got darker with the rain that intensified. Rachel shook her head again. Jane tucked a strand of wet hair behind Rachel's ear and said only a few words.

Rachel broke. Her bottom lip quivered and her knees shook as Jane wrapped her arms around her to hold her up, keeping a tight and loving embrace. The sound of Rachel's sobs travelled across the cemetery as she finally cried.

They just stood there in the rain, crying as Rachel stared at the open grave, unable to walk away for what would be the very last time. Jane looked over Rachel's shoulder and nodded her head at Maura. "Go," she mouthed silently, "home."

Maura shook her head but she looked at Lily who was shivering in the rain and she felt Morgan against her side getting restless and wanting to get away from this place that held so much pain. So she nodded and turned her back on her wife and surrogate daughter to take her family home. She felt an ache in her stomach when they walked towards the car. She felt the need to bury herself in Jane's strong arms, hide her face in those curls she loved so much and feel her lips on hers. She wanted to be comforted by the love of her life and she wanted to comfort her. She just wanted Jane. But she knew the girls were their priority. The shaking girl against her, her quiet older daughter and her restless little girl needed her.

So she drove them all home and made them hot chocolate. She got them to change into dry and warm pajamas and changed out of her funeral dress into a comfortable pair of sweatpants and a white sweater.

Back in the living room, she was incredibly relieved to see Morgan sitting on the floor playing a card game with Lily. Distraction would be good for her. She sat down on the couch next to Anna who was reading one of her books.

"Hi, baby," she whispered, brushing a strand of damp hair over Anna's shoulder.

Anna smiled sadly at her mother, and tucked her feet up on the couch to lean into her side.

"Rough day," Maura said softly, knowing how Anna sucked up emotions around her. A day like this left her absolutely drained.

"Yeah." Anna closed her book and snuggled against her mother. "Is Rachel gonna be okay?"

"Your Ma is with her," Maura sighed as she thought about those two who were probably still at the grave. Jane and Rachel shared a great connection. Rachel felt safe with the detective and Jane understood her without needing words. "She'll be okay," Maura whispered, "even if that will take a while."

Anna nodded. "I want them to stay, Mom," she said softly. "It's not fair to send them somewhere else."

Maura smiled, looking at Morgan who managed a small smile at one of Lily's jokes or attempts to cheat at the game. She wanted them to stay too. She didn't even need to be their mother. She just wanted them close to her to look after them. To take care of them. To make sure they were loved and safe. To make sure they had the family they deserved. Where that would eventually lead, she didn't know. All she knew was that she wanted those girls to have a home. She sighed and kissed the top of Anna's head on her chest. "I want them to stay too."


	47. Chapter 47

Chapter 47

Rain was dribbling down on the coffin that was lowered into the grave. The sounds of it made Jane's heart ache. She felt cold to the bone and as the rain dribbled into her neck and slid down her back. But she stayed. She kept her strong arms wrapped around the crying girl against her side, she kept whispering quiet words that hopefully offered a tiny bit of comfort. The colorful flowers around the grave were a sharp contrast with the grey sky and the rain that kept on falling.

Jane took a deep breath and kissed Rachel's temple, feeling the girl shivering against her. "We should get home," she said softly, for the tenth time since they were standing there.

Rachel shook her head.

"Yeah, c'mon honey." Jane squeezed her shoulder. "It's time."

"No," Rachel's voice was hoarse and weak as she stared at the ground. "I can't."

"It's time, Rachel." Jane kissed the top of Rachel's head that rested on her shoulder before gently lifting her head to look into her bloodshot blue eyes. "Time to go home."

Fresh tears filled Rachel's eyes and she shook her head. "No…"

Jane sighed. "It's getting late, baby. We're cold and wet. It's time to go home."

"I can't." Rachel looked back at the flowers, her shoulders raised up to her ears.

"Rachel." Jane cupped the girl's cheek and turned her head to look back into her eyes. "He'll still be gone. Whether we stay here or go home, he'll still be gone."

Rachel's breath hitched in her throat and she shook her head. "N-no…"

"Yeah. It's time, honey."

Rachel offered a weak protest but she leaned closer into Jane's side and started to give in.

"C'mon." Jane gently started pulling Rachel away, feeling the teenager sobbing against her as she slowly turned her back on the open grave.

They left the grave, slowly walking away from the coffin that contained the body of Rachel's father. Jane dealt with death on a daily basis but this was entirely different. She dealt with grief and loss every single day but now that it came so close, it ached her heart. Now that if affected the people she loved, it affected her more than she expected.

Reaching the gate, Rachel turned around one last time, took a deep breath and walked away. She cried the whole way home and didn't speak one word until they walked through the front door and Maura sighed in relief when she saw them.

"Oh God," she pulled herself away from Anna and stood up from the couch. "Honey," she cupped Rachel's face and kissed her forehead. "You're freezing." She brushed her wet hair back and caressed her cheek.

Rachel just nodded weakly and allowed it without replying.

"Why don't you go take a hot shower?" Jane whispered, helping Rachel out of her heavy coat that offered no warmth any longer.

"Rachel?" Morgan stood up from her place on the floor and hurried towards her sister, wrapping her arms around the taller girl's waist.

Jane smiled sadly at the sight and took off her own coat, shivering in her cold, wet clothes. She kissed Maura's lips, placing her hand on her side.

"How is she?" Maura whispered.

"In pain." Jane sighed deeply and looked at the crying sisters. "And mostly cold." 

Maura smiled and kissed her wife again. "Get out of those wet clothes," she said softly, "I have warm soup." She pulled away and looked at the girls. "Rachel, for you too."

"I'm not hungry." She shrugged and untangled herself from her sister. "I'm gonna take a shower."

Jane sighed and ruffled Morgan's short hair before greeting Anna and Lily with a kiss and heading upstairs to get changed into dry clothes. She threw her clothes in a hamper and slipped into a pair of old sweatpants, pulled a sports bra over her head and searched her drawer for a sweater.

"Jane…" A pair of warm arms wrapped around her waist from behind, loving kisses being placed on her bare shoulder.

"Hi." Jane turned and put her arms around the beautiful blonde that was standing a little shorter than her without shoes. She hid her face into the crook of her neck and sighed deeply. "Crappy day, huh?"

Maura hummed. She hid herself into her wife's strong arms, seeming happy to finally be close to her again. "What are we going to do, Jane?"

"What do you mean?"

Maura sighed and turned her head to rest it on Jane's chest, tucking herself under her chin. "I want them to stay," she whispered. "I want them to be with us. I want to take care of them and love them and-… I just want them to be loved."

The amount of love and pain in her wife's voice startled Jane and she tightened the embrace. "We're not sending them away, Maur," she answered quietly. "If they want to stay, they'll stay."

"There will be four kids in the house, Jane. Four girls. One of which is an eighteen-year-old." Maura sighed and kissed her wife's neck. "Can we do that?"

"Hey, you're talking about detective Jane freaking Rizzoli here!" She chuckled and pulled back to look at her beautiful wife. "We can handle it." Her smirk turned into a loving smile. "Remember when we first got Anna? And we were constantly freaking out?"

Maura laughed and nodded her head. "Yes, I remember."

"You told me," Jane whispered, "that the most important thing is to love her. As much as we can. That's it, that's all she needs. Is it really that different to love four girls instead of two?"

Maura shook her head. "No." She smiled and tucked a damp curl behind Jane's ear. "I guess not."

"So we'll keep them. Foster them if we have to." Jane shrugged, thinking about the two sisters downstairs. Those beautiful girls with their dark hair, blue eyes and painful history. Rachel with her contagious smile, Morgan with her sparkling personality and those sweet rosy cheeks. "Adopt, I don't care. As long as they are loved and safe. With us."

Maura looked at her wife with a loving smile curling her lips. "I agree," she said softly, sealing her words with a loving kiss. "We'll just need to talk to the girls first. Our girls, I mean."

"I'm afraid they're all our girls now, Maur," Jane smirked and tightened the embrace, feeling Maura's hands running up and down her bare back. "But yeah we should talk to Anna and Lily."

"Anna wants them to stay. I'm not sure about Lily, a crowded house is quite tiring for her."

"Hm. She and Morgan are great together though."

"They are." Maura nodded against her wife, pushing her hands under the strap of Jane's grey sports bra on her back. "We'll all need time to adjust." She took a deep breath and pulled back to look at her wife with that loving sparkle in her hazel eyes. "Right now we just have to guide them through the grieving process."

"Yeah." Jane furrowed her brow and reluctantly pulled herself away from her wife, immediately missing her warm body against hers. "Won't be easy."

"I know the five stages of grief," Maura said softly, leaning back against the wall, "but it's like they keep going through them multiple times and in different orders and-… I can't…" she sighed and shook her head. "It's harder to analyze when it's someone you love so much."

"You don't have to analyze them, Maur," Jane pulled a sweater over her head and smiled at her beautiful wife. "You just have to hold them when they cry, make sure they eat and sleep and shower… You just gotta love them."

Maura smiled, pushing herself away from the wall to capture Jane's lips in a sweet kiss. "I can do that."

"Good. Let's start by getting some food in their stomachs 'cause I don't think they've eaten anything today."

"Morgan had a small amount of cereal," Maura said while she followed her wife out of the closet to get downstairs. "I don't think Rachel had breakfast."

Downstairs, Morgan was sitting at the dinner table with a bowl of soup in front of her, Anna sitting opposite her with her own soup. Jane chuckled and brushed her hand through Anna's hair. "I see you took good care of Morgan, hm?"

"Yeah." Anna nodded. "Mom said we had to eat some soup."

"Right." Jane smiled proudly and moved to Morgan, placing a kiss on top of her head. "You getting it down, baby?"

Morgan sighed, swirling the soup through her bowl as she chewed on a piece of chicken. "Yeah."

"Lily!" Maura called her youngest daughter in the living room. "Come get some soup, you haven't eaten either."

"I don't wanna! It's got broccoli in it!" Lily whined while she stacked the cards on top of each other.

"Oh don't whine, the pieces are so small you can barely taste them. Come here." She filled a bowl and slid it over the kitchen counter.

Lily groaned and stood up, dragging her feet before climbing up on the stool. She rested her head on her hand and wrinkled her nose at the soup in front of her.

"Stop that, young lady." Maura pointed her finger at the whining girl. "Eat."

Lily sensed her mother's tone and took her spoon to start eating.

"See?" Jane smirked when Lily swallowed the first spoonful. "It's not even bad."

Lily shook her head but didn't look up from her bowl until Rachel walked back into the room, wearing a pair of pajama pants, a warm sweater and her wet hair tied up in a high bun. Jane smiled at her and rubbed her back. "You want some soup?" she asked softly. "Maura made it herself, it's pretty good despite the broccoli."

"I'm not hungry," Rachel replied hoarsely.

"I know," Jane sighed. "But we have to eat."

Rachel nodded and reluctantly sat down at the kitchen counter. She pulled her sleeves over her hands and smiled sadly when Maura handed her a bowl of her own. She wrapped her hands around the steaming bowl and took a deep breath to compose herself.

Maura sighed. She put her hand on Rachel's cheek and pressed a kiss on her temple. "Eat, sweetheart," she whispered. "It's good for you."

Rachel nodded slowly, hesitantly playing with the soup. "Maura?"

"Yes?"

She sighed and bit her lip. "H-how long can we stay here?"

Maura looked up at Jane and furrowed her brow, not knowing what to answer. Jane brushed her hand through her own hair and moved to stand next to her wife, facing Rachel. "We were thinking… For as long as you want."

Rachel smiled sadly. "We can't do that."

"Why not?"

Rachel looked at Jane and shrugged her shoulders. "I-… I don't know. I'd feel guilty."

"Rachel," Jane smiled and took a seat next to the teenager, "Maura and I love you like crazy."

"You do?" Rachel furrowed her brow and looked down into her bowl.

"Yeah. You and that stubborn little sister of yours." Jane smirked and gently caressed Rachel's cheek. "I'm not saying we should decide anything final, I'm just-…" Jane sighed and her smile fell. "I'm just saying we'd like to be your home for now."

"So…" Morgan looked up at the women from the dinner table, having finished her soup, "we can stay?"

Maura chuckled and walked towards the girl to press her lips against her temple. "Yes, sweetheart."

Morgan smiled the first genuine smile of that day and her shoulders relaxed in relief. Jane smiled at the sight, squeezed Rachel's shoulder and went to get something to eat for herself as well.

After the family ate, Rachel only a few spoons, Jane saw that Lily was missing from the table and went to look for the girl. She furrowed her brow when she heard ruffling coming from her bedroom. Opening the door, she saw Lily lying on her back on her bed, playing a game on her mother's iPad.

"Hi, baby." Jane smiled and slowly walked into the room. "Can I come in?"

"Yeah."

"You sure?"

"Yeaaah." Lily chuckled and turned her head to look at her mother.

Jane smiled and sat down on the edge of the bed, brushing a few dark curls out of her daughter's face. "Are you okay?"

Lily nodded, clicking through the other level on the iPad. "Yeah, I guess."

Jane hummed and stroked Lily's cheek with the back of her fingers.

"Mama?" Lily lowered the iPad to look at her mother. "Are Rachel and Morgan gonna be our sisters?"

"We don't know, baby," Jane replied softly. "It's too soon to say anything about that right now." She looked into her daughter's familiar dark eyes, seeing concern and exhaustion. "What do you think?"

Lily shrugged. "I think… I think it's cool if they stay."

"But…?"

"No but."

"I heard a but." Jane tickled Lily's stomach, eliciting sweet giggles.

"You didn't!" Lily laughed and rolled on her side to avoid her mother's tickles.

"But seriously," Jane's smile fell and she stroked Lily's stomach. "I know a crowded house is not easy for you."

Lily's giggles faded and she nodded her head. "Yeah, I get tired when there's a lot of people."

"Exactly. And this means the house will be a lot busier with two more girls."

"Yep." Lily nodded, shifting on her bed to get comfortable. "But I don't mind. I can just go up to my room when I'm tired."

Jane smiled lovingly. "That's true."

"And besides, Rachel and Morgan don't have anywhere to go and they really love you and Mommy and Anna a lot so… It's for the best."

Jane nodded, gently caressing her daughter's pale cheek with the back of her hand. She was beyond proud of her little girl. She kept other people's interests in mind and she knew how to take care of herself by taking her own space. "I think so too," Jane whispered. "I'm proud of you, baby. You're being very brave and strong in these crazy times."

Lily smiled shyly. "I kinda want things to go back to normal, though," she replied quietly. "I don't like it when people cry all the time."

Jane chuckled. "Me neither. Especially if the people you love are crying."

"Yeah, I hate that!" Lily nodded in agreement. "It's like I have to cry all the time too just because they cry!"

"You haven't cried a lot then today, baby," Jane brushed her daughter's messy curls back, thinking about the day that had gone by in a blur for her little girl.

"No, I can make my tears go back in." Lily pushed her chest forward, looking proud.

Jane furrowed her brow, not mirroring her daughter's proud grin. "You gotta let the tears out sometimes too, you know," she whispered. "If you make them go back in all the time, you explode from all the sadness."

"Explode?"

"Not literally." Jane smirked. "I mean… You can't keep your feelings inside for so long. You gotta cry every now and then, to let them out. It's good for you."

"Why?"

"Bottling things up makes it worse. When you keep the tears inside for a long time, they'll hurt more when they finally get out." Jane stroked her fingers across Lily's cheek and looked into her dark eyes. "So you just have to remember to cry a little every now and then."

Lily nodded slowly, listening intently to her mother. "I don't like crying."

"Me neither," Jane chuckled at the resemblance with her daughter. She mastered the art of bottling up her feelings. But she also knew from experience that it only made things worse. "But it's good for you. Makes you feel better afterwards." She smiled sadly and leaned down to kiss the girl's temple. "And you know what?" she whispered. "You'll get lots of hugs and kisses." She planted kisses on Lily's cheeks, causing her to giggle and wrinkle her nose.

"Ew, Mama!" Lily squirmed away and sat up on the bed. "I'll cry later, is that okay? I don't feel like it now."

Jane laughed and nodded her head. "Yeah, baby. Whenever you want."

"'Kay." Lily slid off the bed and grabbed the iPad from it. "I'm gonna ask Anna to help me with this level."

"Alright." Jane chuckled and stood up herself to follow her daughter downstairs. She would be fine. She was young, naïve and playful. Adjusting to a new situation would be tiring for all of them but they all knew it was for the best. They all loved Rachel and Morgan and they all wanted to offer them the home they needed. The road ahead wouldn't be easy. It would be filled with obstacles, certain ones harder than others. It would be a bumpy road and there would be floods of tears and so much pain. But on the other side there was so much love. So much love, care and devotion to each other. They could handle all the obstacles on their way.


	48. Chapter 48

Chapter 48

"Are you ready?" Maura handed Morgan her backpack and tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. It would be her first day back in school and Maura could tell the girl was nervous. She was tired. Anxious.

Morgan took a deep breath and nodded. "I guess."

"Anna will be with you," Maura said softly. "And I will be there to pick you girls up afterwards."

"I know." Morgan smiled nervously and fumbled with her coat.

"Come here." Maura wrapped the short girl up in her arms and kissed the top of her head while she pulled her close. "You'll be okay, sweetheart. I'm proud of you." 

Morgan smiled shyly and sighed.

"We gotta go, girls!" Jane grabbed her keys from the counter and threw a jacket towards Lily. "Did you remember to bring your homework?"

"Yep!" Lily put on her jacket and threw her backpack on her back.

"Morgan, Anna, you ready?"

"Yeah." Morgan smiled and straightened her back. "I'm ready."

Maura smiled proudly and cupped the girl's face to press her lips against her forehead. "Bye, honey. I love you."

"Love you too." Morgan followed Jane towards the front door to get to school, while Anna hurried towards her mother to kiss her goodbye.

"Bye, pretty girl," Maura kissed her daughter's cheek and brushed her blond hair back. "Look after Morgan today, okay?"

"Yeah, I will." Anna took her responsibility seriously. She was tired but she took good care of her friend, always looking after her and making sure she was okay. She was a sensitive, caring young girl. She made sure Morgan ate her food, had enough to drink and got enough sleep. She called Maura when Morgan cried, knowing how her mother was one of the very few people to be able to comfort her. Morgan would be fine with Anna today.

Maura gave Lily a quick kiss, pecked her wife's lips and waved them goodbye as they all hurried towards he car to avoid being late. She sighed when she closed the door, the silence of an empty house overwhelming her.

The past two weeks had been tiring. Rachel and Morgan moved their stuff out of their old house and into the Rizzoli-Isles home that was now officially their foster home. They both had their own bedroom, Rachel next to the yoga room downstairs and Morgan in the smallest room upstairs. They slowly started decorating the rooms to the girls' taste but they didn't need much. They were perfectly happy with a bed, a closet, a warm home and a loving family. A crowded house needed time to get used to. The whole family was tired. Jane and Maura barely slept and spent their nights comforting crying girls and falling in and out of a restless slumber. The amount of grief was indescribable. The girls were slowly getting back on their feet and it really was time to send them back to school after a week and a half of staying home. A relapse every now and then was normal and healthy but the girls were getting back. Adjusting to their new life. Adjusting to their new family, foster mothers, sisters and a new home.

A door opened and pulled Maura out of her thoughts. She smiled when she saw Rachel walking into the kitchen. She was tying her hair up in a bun and opened a cabinet to look for something to eat for breakfast.

"Good morning." Maura walked towards the kitchen and opened the fridge. "I made you a smoothie."

"Oh thanks." Rachel smiled gratefully and took a large glass from the woman in front of her.

"How are you? Do you have a long day today?"

Rachel shrugged and swallowed her first sip. "Nah."

"Will you be home for dinner?"

"I guess, yeah."

"Okay." Maura sighed and nervously straightened her skirt. She was still trying to figure out how to raise an eighteen-year-old. Did she need to give her a curfew? Was she supposed to let her be? Let het do whatever she wants?

"Thanks for this, I'm gonna go do my make-up." Rachel lifted her glass and headed towards the downstairs bathroom to get ready for school. Her last months in high school.

Maura said goodbye to the teenager, gave her a quick hug and watched her driving away in her old car that was barely able to hold up a steering wheel. With the house yet again empty, she gathered her own stuff and headed towards BPD to get started on a day full of autopsies, meetings and more autopsies.

She wanted to be there for the girls when they got back from school but she was forced to hide herself away in her home office to finish the reports she needed to get through. By the time she finally finished, Jane was back home and making dinner for the family, Anna and Morgan were doing their homework at the dinner table and Lily was watching a cartoon on television.

Maura sighed and rubbed her forehead while she walked into the kitchen, wrapping an arm around her wife's waist. "Hi, love," she whispered. "I didn't know you were home."

"Hi." Jane turned her head to capture Maura's lips in a quick but loving kiss. "I didn't want to disturb you."

Maura hummed and nuzzled herself into the crook of Jane's neck when she turned back to her cooking. "How are the girls?"

"Tired. But fine, they had a good day."

"Good." Maura pressed her lips against Jane's cheek, letting the kiss linger for a few seconds before pulling away with a sigh. "I miss you, beautiful," she whispered in her ear.

Jane's lips curled up into a slight smirk and she turned to kiss her wife. "I miss you too."

"Hmm." Maura put her hand in the back pocket of Jane's jeans and leaned in closer. "I think we should organize a date night sometime in the next few weeks."

"Yeah," Jane nodded and pressed her lips against Maura's temple. "I think so too. Life's been way too rushed lately."

"Next week." Maura nodded and kissed Jane's cheek again. "Just the two of us."

"Deal."

"Deal." Maura chuckled, kissed her wife one last time and untangled herself to walk towards the girls at the dinner table. "Hi, babies." She kissed Anna's cheek and the top of Morgan's head. "How was school?"

"Good." Anna smiled at her mother. "I got a new book from the library, the one you told me about the other day."

"Oh, great! You're going to love that one." Maura caressed Anna's cheek and moved to Morgan, brushing her dark hair out of her face. "How about you? Did you have a good day as well?"

Morgan shrugged. "It was fine."

"Hm." Maura wrapped her arms around the girl's chest from behind and rested her cheek against her temple. "I'm proud of you."

Morgan smiled slightly and fumbled with her pencil. "It was hard," she whispered. "People kept asking about Dad and what happened."

Maura hummed and tightened her arms around the young teenager. "What did you say to them?"

"Nothing, really. Anna told them I didn't want to talk about it."

"Good." Maura smiled and looked at her oldest daughter, seeing her lost in thought when she worked in a math assignment. "So Anna took good care of you."

"She did." Morgan nodded and turned her attention back to her homework when Maura pulled away.

She walked towards Lily on the couch and sat down next to her while kissing the top of her head. "Hi, sweetheart."

"Hi." Lily smiled up at her mother and immediately moved to lean into her side, resting her head on her mother's chest.

"Did you have fun at school today?"

Lily nodded. "Yeah."

Maura smiled and combed her fingers through her daughter's familiar curls. She absolutely loved to witness the resemblance between Lily and Jane. Lily was truly a miniature Jane Rizzoli. She had her mother's curls, her chocolate brown eyes, skinny figure and small nose. Her cheeks were still chubby like a child should be, but Maura knew she would grow up to have the same sharp cheekbones as her mother and she would be absolutely gorgeous. But Maura's favorite part was that Lily was her own unique self. Her hair wasn't as dark as Jane and her nose had a few freckles on them. Her cheeks were rosy and pink, and she was short for her age. She had Jane's stubbornness but she was sweeter. Softer. She liked to roughhouse and play in the mud but it was always followed by snuggles.

When dinner was ready and Morgan and Anna were setting the table, Maura furrowed her brow and looked at her watch. "Jane?" She untangled herself from Lily and stood up from the couch. "Did Rachel tell you anything about when she would be home?"

"No, just that she won't be home for dinner." Jane shrugged and stirred the pasta sauce.

"She won't?" Maura looked around the room. "I-… Isn't that something she should discuss with us? Instead of just telling us?"

"She's eighteen, Maur. I'm just glad she told us beforehand."

Maura sighed and felt a nervous ache in her stomach. "Where is she?"

"I don't know." Jane shrugged. She grabbed the pan and put it on the dinner table. "Dinner's ready."

"Jane! We don't know where she is!" 

"Maura, she's eighteen!" Jane smiled and took her wife's hand, gently leading her towards the table. "She's a big girl, she'll be fine. Let's just have dinner, okay?"

Maura took a deep breath and sat down at the table next to Anna to have dinner with her family. By the time Lily was tucked into bed, Rachel still wasn't home and Maura started to get worried. She knew she was irrational but her girls had been at home by her side for the past few days and she found herself worrying about them when they were away.

Finally, after Anna and Morgan had gone to bed as well and Jane was taking a shower, the front door opened and Rachel walked in.

"Rachel! My goodness, where have you been?" Maura stood up from her seat at the kitchen counter and hurried towards the girl that was taking off her coat.

Rachel furrowed her brow. "At Maggie's house, why?"

"Who's Maggie?"

"A friend…" Rachel put down her bag on a chair and raised her hand. "Why?"

"I was worried sick! You-… you should tell us where you are. I need to know where you are, that's it."

"You can't know where I am all the time, Maura."

"Of course I can. You just have to take your responsibility and inform us." Maura pointed her finger at the teenager and immediately regretted her strict tone.

"My responsibility? Jeez, Maura!"

"Excuse me?" 

"Stop acting like you're my mother! I'm eighteen, I can take care of myself!" Rachel balled her fists and her voice was loud and angry. "Stop treating me like a little kid!"

"You're only eighteen! I'm your foster parent and I am supposed to look after you and take care of you."

Rachel dropped her hands to her side and shook her head. "Foster parent, yeah. I'm eighteen, I don't need to be fostered. And…" she bit her lip to hide her tears, "I don't have parents, Maura."

Maura sighed and regretted where this was going. "I mean-…"

"I know what you mean." Rachel furrowed her brow, shook her head and walked away to her room, slamming the door behind her.

Maura rubbed her forehead and felt tears burning behind her closed eyelids. She was unreasonable. She just wanted to take care of them, how could she be so wrong? She sighed deeply and slowly walked towards Rachel's bedroom door. Should she give her some time? Her own space? The sound of a quiet sob made up her mind and she knocked on the door. "Rachel? Honey, I'm sorry…" Maura wiped a tear from her cheek. "Can I come in?"

When she heard no reply, she carefully opened the door and saw Rachel lying on her bed with her back facing the door, her shoulders shaking with the tears she cried.

"I'm sorry, honey," Maura whispered, sitting down on the edge of the bed. When Rachel didn't push her away, she put her hand on the girl's shoulder and squeezed gently. "This is a first for me too, you know," she said softly. "I've never had an eighteen-year-old daughter before. I'm getting used to things and-… And I make mistakes. I was stupid, I know you're old enough to take care of yourself and I know you don't need foster parents. I shouldn't have said what I said. I'm sorry."

"I do need foster parents," Rachel whispered through her tears, the words barely audible.

Maura furrowed her brow. "What do you mean?"

"I need you and Jane," Rachel's fists grabbed the sheets and she hid her face into her pillow. "And I hate that!"

"Oh, honey…" Maura rubbed her hand up and down Rachel's back.

Rachel turned her head and looked at Maura, black streaks of mascara on her cheeks, her blue eyes filled with tears. "Do you really see us as your daughters?"

Maura smiled and wiped a black tear from the girl's cheek. "I suppose so, yes. I love you and Morgan like I love Anna and Lily."

"I…" Rachel wiped her cheeks with the back of her hand and sniffled. "I don't really have the best experience with moms so I-… I don't know if I'll ever call you Mom but-… I think you're a good mother. And Jane too."

Maura smiled lovingly and leaned down to press her lips against Rachel's temple while she brushed a strand of hair out of her face. "I love you, sweetheart," she whispered. "We'll be whatever you need us to be."

"Thanks." Rachel smirked and turned on her side. "Can you be my driver and drive me places? That'd be cool. I need to be at the mall tomorrow at five."

Maura chuckled and shook her head while she pinched the girl's side. "You have your own car, young lady. Drive yourself."

"Yeah… About that…" Rachel sighed and lowered her head. "My car kinda broke down."

"What?"

"I mean, I can still drive it but there are a few red lights flickering in the dashboard and my dad always said that's a bad sign."

"My God, you shouldn't have driven it!" Maura sighed and rubbed her forehead. "We'll get it looked at tomorrow. We can get you a new one-…" 

"No." Rachel interrupted her and sat up on her bed. "I don't want a new one. I want to keep this one."

"Rachel-…"

"I want to keep it." She looked sternly at the woman in front of her. The car was a gift from her father. He could barely afford it and the car was basically a piece of trash but it was a gift. It reminded her of her father and his strength. It reminded her of how he got the job at the car repair shop and how he fought to support his family. How he worked overtime for weeks to pay for the old car for his daughter.

"Okay," Maura whispered, gently squeezing Rachel's hand. "We'll fix it."

"Thanks."

"Just promise you won't drive that thing as long as those lights are on! I won't have you exploding!"

Rachel chuckled and wiped the last of her tears. "Okay."

"Good." Maura cupped the girl's cheek and kissed her forehead before looking into her shimmering blue eyes. "Are we okay?"

Rachel smiled and nodded her head. "Yeah. We're okay."

 _A/N To make sure this story doesn't grow into a 100-chapter one, I'll start a sequel. I have a few more ideas and I can go on for a while, so I really hope you guys will follow me to that story! I think this part will have two more chapters before the sequel. I never meant for this to be so big but your support and kind reviews are overwhelming and I love this family so much! Thank you all for your support, please let me know what you think!_


	49. Chapter 49

Chapter 49

Jane groaned while she lowered the bags and sat down in a small booth in a cozy restaurant. She hated Christmas shopping and was incredibly glad it was done for the year. Lily sat down next to her, her dark curls tied up in a ponytail, a warm scarf wrapped around her neck. She was feeling under the weather today so the women decided to keep her at home for a day. She was doing well in school and she deserved a day with her mothers after the past weeks that had been excruciating for all of them.

"You want hot chocolate?" Jane asked while she took Lily's coat and put it next to her.

Lily nodded, sniffling loudly due to her stuffed nose. Maura wrinkled her nose and grabbed a tissue from her purse to hand to her daughter. "When are you gonna buy my presents, Mom?" Lily asked after she blew her nose.

Maura chuckled. "Maybe we've already bought them!"

"Really?" Lily raised her eyebrows.

"Nah, we're not buying you presents this year." Jane smirked and shifted in her seat to get comfortable.

"What?" Lily's eyes went wide and she shot her attention to her mother.

"I'm kidding!" Jane chuckled and tucked a curl behind Lily's ear. "We already got a bunch of presents. For you and the rest."

Lily sighed in relief and nodded her head. "I think Rachel's gonna love her new shoes," she said with a sweet smile.

"Oh I think so too." Maura smiled proudly. "And Anna will love the book you picked out for her." 

Lily furrowed her brow. A waiter just passed them and she missed what her mother said. Small things like this still hurt her more than she showed. She was totally adjusted to her hearing aids but it only helped part of her hearing loss. The family developed their own little sign language that didn't come close to the official American Sign Language but it worked for them. They used it for small things like 'set the table' or 'do you want something to drink?' or 'give me a kiss' and it worked.

Maura waited for the noise to fade and smiled at her daughter. "Anna will love that book."

"Yeah." Lily grinned. "She told me she thinks it's a good one so I know she's gonna like it." She coughed loudly and furrowed her brow when she finally finished. Her cold was wearing her out.

"Drinks will get here soon, baby." Jane caressed Lily's cheek and kissed the top of her head. "Let's not let this cold get any worse, alright?"

Lily chuckled and shook her head. "I'm trying."

"Good." Jane pulled her girl close against her side as they waited for their drinks to arrive. Lily was tired. The recent events didn't exhaust her like it did for Anna and she went through it with her usual energy and resilience but everything tired her nonetheless. She rested her head on her mother's shoulder when she warmed her hands on the mug with hot chocolate, shivering slightly.

Maura smiled lovingly at her wife after taking a sip of her tea. "I still need to buy you a present," she said softly. "Why won't you just tell me what you want?"

Jane smirked and shook her head. "I don't need anything."

"Jane."

"What? I don't!" She shrugged and chuckled to herself. Maura was easy when it came to Christmas shopping. She knew what she wanted and Jane bought it for her, along with something meaningful that expressed her love. This year, that was a photograph from the entire family printed on canvas. It was taken when they were looking at the first snow of the year, Maura and Jane with their arms wrapped around each other, Lily in front of Jane with Jane's hand resting on her stomach, Morgan against Maura's side with Anna next to her and Rachel standing on front of Maura, the blonde's hand resting on her shoulder. It was a short family moment that Angela captured perfectly. It captured everything Jane needed. Her wife and daughters, that's all. She didn't need Christmas presents.

"Mom, you should just get Ma new boxing gloves," Lily said, lifting her head from Jane's shoulder. "Y'know she broke one."

"She did?"

Lily nodded. "Yeah, the thingy broke off so now it keeps falling off." She giggled softly. "Real funny."

"Boxing gloves?" Maura wrinkled her nose in disapproval. "For a Christmas present?"

Lily shrugged her shoulders. "You wanted to know what Mama wants. I guess she wants a new one."

Maura sighed, smiling slightly at her daughter. "Thank you, baby. I'll think about it."

Lily looked up at Jane and shook her head. "She's not gonna get you a new glove."

Jane laughed at her daughter's insight and tucked a strand of dark hair behind the girl's ear. "Guess not."

"Hey!" Maura chuckled. "This Christmas is going to be great, I know it."

Maura was mostly right. Christmas Eve was spent with the family in the house, watching Christmas movies and unwrapping one of their presents, like the Rizzoli-Isles tradition. Rachel was at a party and Maura only slightly panicked an hour before she got home. The girls slept in their own bed and Lily even went to bed surprisingly early just because it would make Christmas morning arrive sooner. Morgan and Anna got along famously, the transition from best friends to sisters turned out to be easier than anyone thought. They knew when to take their space from each other and they knew when to find each other again. Christmas Eve was spent watching movies and giggling like the school girls they were.

When Christmas morning finally arrived, Jane woke up early. She smiled to herself when she felt her wife wrapped around her, her leg thrown over her thighs, the blonde's head resting on her chest, her arm wrapped around her waist. Jane opened her eyes and exhaled deeply, gently placing a kiss on top of Maura's head, effectively startling the smaller woman awake.

Maura hummed and snuggled closer against her wife. Jane loved a sleepy Maura Isles. It was her favorite part of the day. Just being in each other's arms, stealing kisses and admiring the beautiful love of her life. She was gorgeous. Free from make-up, freckles shining, hair frizzy and messy, beautiful hazel eyes drooping from sleep. "Morning," Maura mumbled quietly. "Time is it?"

Jane looked at the alarm clock on the night stand and groaned. "Seven. On Christmas morning."

The realization struck Maura and she lifted her head, smiling sleepily at her wife. "Merry Christmas," she whispered sleepily. She leaned down to lightly kiss her lips, morning breath long forgotten. "My love."

"Merry Christmas." Jane smiled and deepened the kiss as she wrapped her arms tighter around the blonde. "Kids are still sleeping."

"That's surprising." Maura sighed contently and snuggled back on top of her wife, nuzzling her face into the crook of Jane's neck. "I love you, my sweet detective," she whispered quietly.

"I love you too, Maur," Jane smirked and kissed the side of the blonde's head, lovingly pulling her closer.

"I'm so grateful to be spending another Christmas with you." Maura sighed deeply and smiled against her wife's skin. "You're still putting up with me."

"What?" Jane furrowed her brow and smirked while she traced her fingers up and down her wife's back under her silk pajama top. "Putting up with you? Maur, I'm pretty sure you're the one that deserves an award."

Maura chuckled and shook her head, not moving from on top of the brunette. "I'm married to the strongest, sweetest and most beautiful woman on the planet," she whispered. "I couldn't be happier." She lifted herself on her elbow and caressed Jane's cheek. "My beautiful, beautiful love."

Jane smiled when she felt her cheeks blushing. "I love you so much," she whispered. "I love you and the family we built together."

Maura nodded her head. "You know," she whispered, "I never knew how powerful it would be to be a mother. I never knew it was possible to feel so much love and pride for those beautiful girls."

"I never knew I wouldn't go crazy in a house full of girls." Jane chuckled and lightly shook her head. "We have four daughters, Maura. Four."

Maura laughed and nodded her head. "I got the memo, yes."

"Well, technically three, right? I mean, we're still fostering Morgan and Rachel's not even officially our foster daughter."

"I don't care about technicality," Maura said softly. "Those girls are our daughters. All of them."

Jane smiled at her wife's determination.

"I know Rachel and Morgan feel different," she continued in a soft whisper, her eyes fixated on the pillow next to her, "even though I love them with all my heart."

"We missed a big part of their lives." Jane shrugged. "We're still getting used to them, I guess."

Maura nodded and looked back into Jane's eyes. She smiled lovingly and moved her hand to comb her fingers through Jane's curls. She was about to speak when a door opened and exciting footsteps ran down the hallway.

Lily's dark curls appeared in the doorway, her lips curled up into an exciting smile. She had been running into their room every Christmas morning ever since she could walk and even though she was eight years old now, Christmas was as exciting for her as any other child. "Mom! Mama!" She hurried into the room and stood next to the bed on Maura's side. "C'mon, it's Christmas!"

Maura chuckled and lifted herself off her wife. "Good morning, sweetheart." She smiled and sat up to cup her daughter's face and kiss her forehead. "Merry Christmas."

"Yeah, Merry Christmas," Lily took Maura's hand and tried to drag her off the bed, "c'mon!"

"Breakfast first, darling." Maura laughed and stood up from the bed, grabbing her robe from a chair and putting it on before turning to look at Jane. "She doesn't change."

Jane chuckled and reluctantly got out of bed herself. "It's tradition." She followed her wife and daughter downstairs and was surprised to see Anna and Morgan standing in the kitchen. She furrowed her brow and walked towards the girls. "Hey, why are you up so early?"

"We're making breakfast," Anna smiled proudly and pointed at the kitchen counter where Morgan was squeezing oranges and Anna was boiling eggs.

Maura bit her lip at the idea of the two girls working with boiling water by themselves in the kitchen before Jane smiled reassuringly at her, silently reminding her of the fact that they were thirteen years old and perfectly capable of cooking breakfast.

"You're too sweet." Maura stood in between the girls and kissed each of their foreheads. "Merry Christmas, babies."

Once Rachel was awake, the family had breakfast together and started opening the presents when they finished, just like they did every year. Lily was jumping around the room the entire time, incredibly happy with every present she got. They were all grateful and happy and Maura even got Jane a new pair of boxing gloves, along with a card that made her tear up even though she would never admit that.

"Jane? Maura?" Rachel nervously sat down on the coffee table in front of the two women on the couch, Lily playing with her toys and Anna and Morgan excitedly talking about their gifts.

"Yeah?"

"I uhm… Can we-…" she sighed and fumbled with her hands, looking down at the floor. "Can we go to the lake? I mean Morgan and I? We used to go every Christmas day and it was kind of a tradition to get away from Mom and take a walk with D-dad and just us and-… Now that he's gone… I-… Morgan and I really want to keep the tradition, y'know? But I understand if we gotta stay here-…"

"Go." Jane smiled and leaned forward to squeeze Rachel's fumbling hands. "Of course you can go."

Rachel sighed in relief and smiled gratefully. "Thanks."

"Great," Maura clapped her hands and was about to stand up, "let me get our stuff."

"Maur." Jane put her hand on Maura's arm and pulled her back down. "I think she just wants to take Morgan."

"Oh." Maura's facial expression dropped before she realized what she did wrong. "Oh, of course."

"I'm sorry-…" 

Maura shook her head. "No, I understand. You two girls go." She smiled lovingly and stroked Rachel's leg. "Make sure you dress warmly, it's cold out. And-…" she sighed and smiled to herself. "Keep Morgan close."

Jane rubbed her wife's back, knowing how deep and special the connection was between Maura and Morgan. Where she sometimes needed time to understand Rachel, she and Morgan barely needed words. It was Maura she ran to when she cried and she trusted her completely.

"Thanks." Rachel smiled at them and stood up from the table.

"Can we go?" Morgan stood up from her chair and stood behind the couch.

"Yeah."

Morgan smiled happily. "When?"

"Whenever you want," Jane looked at the girl behind her. "Just try to be home for the family dinner? If you want to of course… I mean-… It would mean a lot to us if you were there. You're part of the family, after all."

Rachel chuckled and ruffled her sister's hair. "Of course, we won't be walking around over there all day."

Morgan nodded and hurried towards the closet to get her coat, zipping it up high before walking towards Jane and Maura. "Yeah we're usually back within an hour or two because Mom wouldn't let us get away for any longer." She shrugged. "And it's cold so we won't stay too long."

Maura nodded and smiled lovingly. "Okay then," she said softly while she reached out her arms towards the young girl, gently pulling her in for a hug and kissing the side of her head. "Be safe."

Morgan just nodded, quickly pecked Jane's cheek and followed her sister towards her car. "Bye! Thanks again." Rachel smiled at them as she tied a scarf around her neck.

"Bye, honey." Jane watched them leave and sighed when they left the house empty except for the small family.

"Wow…" Lily furrowed her brow and stood up from her seat, walking around the living room. "This is weird."

"What is?"

"Just us, like before." Lily shrugged and sat down on the couch next to Jane. "Just weird."

"How do you mean?" Jane whispered, gently brushing her daughter's dark curls back. "Do you miss how it was before?"

Lily shrugged and tucked her feet up on the couch, pulling her knees to her chest as she leaned comfortably into her mother's side. She hesitated, not wanting to say anything hurtful about her brand new foster sisters. "I don't know," she said softly. "Sometimes, maybe."

"It's a lot to adjust to." Maura smiled reassuringly and rested against Jane's side to caress Lily's cheek. "It's okay if it's hard sometimes."

Lily nodded slightly. "I like that they are here. That's not it."

"Hm." Jane hummed and rested her cheek against the side of her daughter's head. "You just miss snuggle time, don't you?"

Lily wrinkled her nose and shook her head. "Nah."

"Yeah she does," Anna said from her place in the chair, chuckling softly. "She told me herself."

"Anna!" Lily glared at her sister and groaned when Maura leaned forward to press kisses to her cheek.

"You can tell us, sweetheart," Maura said softly. "There's nothing to be embarrassed about."

Lily shook her head and snuggled into Jane's side. "I'm fine."

Jane knew those words were true. Lily was fine. She was simply adjusting to their new life and bigger family, but she was fine. And one look at Anna told Jane that she was fine too. Tired and insecure, but fine.

Unfortunately, Morgan wasn't fine. When she and her sister came back, Rachel's shoulders were hanging low and she looked at Maura with a desperate look in her eyes. Morgan was crying uncontrollably, her scarf tied high around her neck, her nose red from the cold, her cheeks pink.

"Oh, sweetheart!" Maura hurried out of the kitchen, leaving Angela with the food. The living room was packed with people and that seemed to scare Morgan. She took one look at Tommy, TJ, Frankie, Korsak and the rest of the family and she hurried upstairs.

"I can't get her to calm down," Rachel said softly when Jane stood up from the couch and furrowed her brow at Rachel. "W-we were talking and everything went fine but she started crying and I comforted her but-… but she won't stop." She shook her head with tears in her eyes. "She needs you and Maura."

Jane nodded and cupped Rachel's cheek to kiss her forehead. "Okay," she whispered. "You did good, Rachel."

Rachel nodded and took a deep breath to steady herself. She managed a small smile and headed towards her room to get herself together. Jane sighed and turned to look at Maura. She smiled sadly and took her hand to lead her upstairs where Morgan was hiding.

"Morgan, my sweet girl," Maura stood at the girl's bedroom door and lowered her head, waiting for a reply. "Can we come in?"

When a soft 'yeah' was heard, Maura opened the door and swallowed her tears when she saw Morgan sitting on the edge of the bed, her head hanging low, her hands folded as her tears fell into the scarf she was still wearing.

Jane sighed and walked towards the bed, gently helping the young girl out of her warm coat, unzipping it and pulling it off her. She sat down next to her, kissed the side of her head and brushed her short dark hair back.

Maura kneeled down in front of her to look into Morgan's eyes, taking the girl's fumbling hands in hers. "Sweetheart…"

"I j-just miss him so much," Morgan whispered, her cheeks wet with tears, her eyes bloodshot from crying. Fresh tears started flooding down her cheeks and she let out an aching sob. "I miss my Dad. I miss him so much!" She sobbed and lifted her hands, balling her fists against her forehead. "I w-want m-my dad… D-daddy…"

Jane just nodded and took the crying girl in her arms. She knew Christmas would be hard. Thanksgiving was hard. Christmas would be harder. She knew holidays would never be the same. Just like the rest of her life. She knew she would spend her coming holidays comforting the aching girl in her arms. Morgan was shaking against her as Maura kept gently massaging her hands, just like she did with Lily when she was angry, just like she did with Jane when her scars ached. Morgan could only stare at her hands and cry. Cry in pain, grief and because of the hole in her heart.

"Dad…" Morgan sniffled and sobbed against Jane's chest.

"I know, sweetheart," Maura whispered with tears in her eyes. "I know, my sweet, sweet girl."

Morgan shook her head and her breath hitched in her throat. "I want him back," she whispered, her voice hoarse with tears. "I just want my dad."

Jane nodded and pulled the crying girl closer against her side, using her other hand to stroke the girl's wet cheek. "I know, baby."

"I want him back!" Morgan balled her fists again, despite Maura's comforting strokes. "I WANT DADDY BACK!" She sobbed and used her fists to push against her temples, a gesture she and her sister had in common. "DAD! DAAAD!" She yelled, screamed, her voice hoarse and broken, her bloodshot eyes looking up at the ceiling, trying desperately to find something to hold on to, to find something to keep her from breaking, to keep her from falling apart. She sobbed and her knuckles turned white from squeezing them into fists so hard. "Dad! DADDY!" She stood up from the bed, both women unable to keep her down. She paced through the room and used her fists to punch against her temples. "Come back Daddy," she whispered, her voice heartbreakingly weak and vulnerable. "Daddy, you gotta come back," she sobbed, looking out of the window on the side of her room. "People talk about us, Dad. We're the sad girls that lost their father. We're the broken girls. We can't do this, Dad. It's like my heart has a hole in it and it keeps tearing up and it h-hurts so m-much…"

Heavy tears fell down Jane's cheeks as she witnessed the young girl in so much pain. Too much pain. No thirteen-year-old should experience this amount of heartbreak. No child should have to cry like this.

Morgan tried to take a deep breath but failed, her breath getting stuck in her throat. She shook her head as her tears kept streaming down her cheeks. "I just want your chicken for Christmas, Dad," she whispered. "I want your stupid presents and I want you to wrestle with us 'cause you're the strongest. I want you to pick me up from school and it hurts so much every time you're not there! I want you," she sobbed quietly and her fists slowly unclenched. "I can't hurt anymore, Dad," she cried, fresh tears streaming down her face, dripping onto the carpet underneath her. "I c-can't…"

When Morgan lowered her head and let out a heartbreaking sob, Jane stood up from the bed and leaned down to lift the short girl up in her arms. She weighed almost nothing. She was short for her age and too skinny. Her thin arms wrapped around Jane's neck and clung to her blouse as a heartbreaking sob wrecked her body. "H-he's gone…"

"I know." Jane felt a few hot tears trickling down her cheeks as she sat down on the foot of the bed, taking Morgan in her lap while Maura sat next to her, pressing her lips against the girl's forehead.

"My sweet, sweet girl," she whispered with tears in her eyes. "I'm so proud of you, you're so strong, so brave, so good…" She caressed her wet cheek with the back of her hand and leaned into her wife's side to get closer to the both of them. "We love you so much, sweetheart," tears trickled down Maura's freckled cheeks as she kept her soothing strokes on Morgan's cheeks and forehead. "I wish I could take your pain away. All of it. I wish I could bring him back," she took a deep breath and kissed Morgan's forehead again. "All I want for you is to be happy, my baby. All I ever want for you is to be loved."

Maura's soft words seemed to calm the crying girl down as her rapid breaths slowly turned steady and her fists stopped clutching Jane's blouse. She took a deep breath and hid herself into Jane's chest, her cries growing silent.

There were no words left. All there was, was pain. Christmas would never be the same for the young girl. Her entire life would never be the same. It was like all the pain from an abusive mother, to her mother in jail and her father passing away, raised to the surface and started flooding over. Like she kept it inside for so long that now that she had to miss her father, it came out. It flooded over like a giant wave that swiped her off her feet and landed her in a lake of tears and grief.

Jane felt the thirteen-year-old crying in her arms and swallowed her own tears. She was ready to catch her whenever the wave hit her. She was ready to dry her tears, to listen to her scream and take the punches. The love she felt for this beautiful young girl was overwhelming. Overwhelming and unconditional. And she knew in that moment, that Morgan was her daughter. It was that moment in which she realized she had locked both Rachel and Morgan in her heart not only as surrogate daughters, but as her own. Her own children that were part of her heart, part of her being and part of her life. Forever.


	50. Chapter 50

Chapter 50

"Morgan?" Anna carefully opened Morgan's bedroom door, peaking only her head inside to see what was going on. "I-… I heard screaming… A-are you okay?"

Morgan didn't reply. She could only cry. Still clinging herself to Jane, not moving from her arms as her tears streamed down her face, her cheeks pale, her eyes red from crying, her voice hoarse from screaming.

Maura smiled sadly at her daughter and reached out her arm to invite her into the room. "No," she whispered softly, "she's not okay."

Anna's brow furrowed and she walked into the room to stand next to her mother, Maura's arm wrapping around her waist as she kissed her cheek. "She will be," she said softly while she tucked a strand of blond hair behind the girl's ear. "But right now…" she sighed deeply and looked at the crying teenager next to her, "she's far from okay."

Tears filled Anna's eyes at the sight of her best friend and sister in so much pain. "Can we help her?" she whispered.

Maura reached up to caress Anna's cheek and shook her head. "We can only hold her. Love her. Dry her tears and tell her we love her."

"I love you, Morgan," Anna said softly, showing a small smile, "you're my best friend and I think you're amazing."

Morgan looked at her friend with tears in her eyes and tried to smile, but she failed. She just nodded her head, mumbled a few uncoherent words and shook her head to try and get herself together.

"It's okay, baby," Jane said softly, her hand rubbing up and down Morgan's back. "Anna knows."

Anna nodded and smiled sadly at her other mother. Maura rubbed her daughter's back but kept her attention focused on the crying girl in Jane's lap. She sighed deeply and reached out to wipe her tears with the back of her hand. Morgan smiled a pained smile through her tears and slid off Jane's lap to sit next to Maura and lean into her side.

"I wish I could take it away," Maura whispered while she wrapped her arm around Morgan's shoulders and pressed her lips against her temple. "I miss your smile, pretty girl."

"I'm s-sorry." Morgan's breath hitched in her throat and she covered her face with her hand as fresh tears filled her eyes.

"Don't be sorry. Your emotions need a way out. You can't build them all up inside, it's only healthy. Your smile will come back eventually. Even if it takes a while." Maura kissed the top of Morgan's head. "You just have such a beautiful smile, that's all."

Jane smiled at the sight of her wife and foster daughter and leaned over Morgan to peck her wife's lips before taking Anna's hand and standing up from the bed. "How about we go back to the family? Leave Morgan and Mom to talk for a bit, hm?" She knew the room was crowded and that made it harder for Morgan to open up. She knew Morgan trusted Maura completely and with all she had, so she left her to process her pain with her foster mother.

Anna nodded and took Jane's hand in hers. "I can make that salad, Mom," she said softly. "So you can stay here."

Maura smiled and felt her heart swelling with love for her little girl that was growing up so fast. She squeezed her daughter's arm. "Thank you, baby."

When Anna and Jane left the room, Maura wrapped both her arms around her foster daughter and pulled her close while she shifted back to sit in a more comfortable position against the wall on the side of Morgan's bed. Morgan sniffled as she followed her, frantically wiping her cheeks as she snuggled into the blonde. "I can't stop crying," she mumbled angrily.

"That's okay." Maura wiped the girl's tears with her thumb. "There's a lot of pain. A lot of tears."

Morgan nodded slowly. "I know he can't come back," she whispered. "No matter how hard I scream that I want him to." She took a deep breath and pushed her knees up to her chest while leaning into Maura's side. "I just-… I miss him _so_ much, y'know? So much that it makes my entire body hurt."

Maura rubbed her hand up and down Morgan's side and pulled her impossibly closer, wanting to hug her pain away. "What…" She hesitated for a moment, not wanting to upset Morgan any further but she asked the question anyway, knowing it was good for her to talk about her pain. "What do you miss most about him?"

Morgan shrugged and smiled a small, sad smile. "The way he smiled when he saw us. And how strong he was." She smiled a full smile and wiped her cheeks with the sleeve of her sweater. "Y'know how strong he was? He could push a car all by himself."

Maura smiled. "Impressive."

"Yeah. And his arms were really big so when he gave us a hug we were practically gone." She chuckled and powered through the tears that welled up in her eyes once again. "When I was little he always made me fly. And I was never scared because I knew Dad wouldn't let me fall." Her smile fell and a few tears made their way down her cheeks. "Even when Mom hurt him again and he was all bruised up, he could still make us fly." She swallowed hard and hid herself closer against the blonde next to her. "He could've knocked her out with one punch but he never did. I never understood why until I asked him and he said he loved her." Morgan shrugged. "I still don't understand love."

"It's a complicated concept," Maura replied softly. Morgan rarely talked about her abusive mother. She was glad to hear her opening up like this.

"I guess, yeah." Morgan furrowed her brow. "But it doesn't seem so complicated with you and Jane."

"Oh, we have had our issues. We still do, sometimes."

"But Jane would never hurt you. Or the other way around." 

"Never."

" _She_ did. And he still stayed with her. I guess-…" Morgan sighed and pulled her sleeve of her hand to wipe her tears again. "I guess he was just too good. Don't you think?"

Maura nodded slowly. "He could've been, yes."

Fresh tears filled Morgan's eyes and she swallowed a lump in her throat. "You know I was never angry at him for staying… Rachel sometimes got pissed because he'd never get angry at her for hurting him. But I just wanted him to stay, I was way too afraid he would leave." She took a shaky breath and her bottom lip quivered. "I thought when she went to jail, it would all be over and we would be with Dad and I would never have to be afraid of him leaving again but-… but he left anyway."

Maura blinked her tears away and kissed the top of Morgan's head. "He didn't leave, honey. Leaving is a verb. It implies an action, a choice. He would never make that choice."

Morgan nodded slowly. "Yeah," she whispered. "He wanted to stay with us. We were finally starting to be happy."

"And he loved you so much, sweet girl," Maura replied softly, hearing her own voice strangled with tears. "So unbelievably much." 

Morgan smiled sadly. "I guess he did."

"I _know_ he did. One time when you and Rachel were visiting us and your dad came to pick you up, he just looked at you two in the backyard and he had the proudest smile on his face. It was summer and you were playing some sort of game with Anna and he looked at me and said, 'gorgeous, huh? Still can't believe they're mine'. I can still hear him say it." Maura smiled to herself at the memory of that lovely man that loved his daughters with all he had. "Then he would turn around, call your names and hug you with those strong arms and I remember him saying he was the luckiest man on earth with girls like you."

"He had probably been drinking beers with the guys from work if he says that," Morgan chuckled, surprising herself.

Maura laughed and brushed the girl's short dark hair behind her ear before kissing her forehead. "He might have. But I know he meant every word."

"Do you think he can see us?" Morgan asked, resting her head on Maura's shoulder. "That he's still here somehow?"

"I don't know, honey."

"I hope so." Morgan smiled and fumbled with the hem of her sweater. "He'd be happy to know we're with you guys, I think."

"You think?" Maura squeezed Morgan's arm.

"Yeah. He'd rather have Rachel go here than to her friends," Morgan chuckled again, "and I guess that's partly because Jane's a cop but he still liked you. You saved him from my mother, after all."

"We simply helped you find the way to save yourselves," Maura replied softly, knowing how much strength it took for Rachel to start talking to them and pass her statement on to the police.

Morgan nodded and seemed lost in thought for a while, her tears slowly drying. "Maura?"

"Hm?"

"You're my mom now, right?"

"Well, foster mother, technically."

"So…" Morgan furrowed her brow and looked down at her lap. "Does that mean I have to call you Mom? And Jane Ma, like Anna and Lily do?"

"You can call us whatever you want, honey."

"I-…" Morgan sighed deeply, her breath shaking. "I don't know if I want to call you Mom," she whispered. "Not because I don't want you to be my mother but-… Just-… Mom is a bad name for me…"

"I understand, sweetheart. You don't have to call us Mom and Ma, Jane and Maura is just fine."

Morgan relaxed her muscles in relief and snuggled closer into Maura's side. "Rachel feels the same, she told me. But we both really love you a lot so don't think we don't want you to be our new parents."

Maura smiled to herself. "Jane and I both really love you a lot too, honey." She chuckled softly. "A whole lot."

Morgan nodded slowly as her head rested on the blonde's chest. She took a deep breath and rubbed her eyes, getting rid of the last of her tears. "Sorry for ruining Christmas," she said softly.

"Oh you didn't ruin anything, sweetheart." Maura kissed the top of Morgan's head. "It takes a lot more to ruin a Rizzoli family Christmas."

Morgan giggled. "Yeah."

"How about we go freshen up and head back downstairs?" Maura asked softly, not wanting to push the girl but knowing the family would be worried and waiting for dinner.

Morgan sighed deeply and nodded. "Yeah, okay."

"Or we can stay up here a little longer if you'd like."

"No, I'm fine." Morgan shook her head and lifted herself off the blonde, taking a deep breath to compose herself and tucking her short hair behind her ears.

Maura chuckled softly and took the clip out of the girl's hair, gently taking a strand of the brown hair and twisting it to tie it to the side of her head again. "There," she whispered. "As good as new." 

Morgan smiled slightly and looked into Maura's eyes, eliciting a sweet chuckle from the blonde. "You wore your sister's mascara again, didn't you?" She cupped the girl's face and used her thumbs to wipe a few black spots from under her eyes.

"Just a little." Morgan averted her gaze and fumbled with her sweater, knowing that Maura generally didn't really like her daughters wearing make-up at thirteen years old.

"It's okay, it is Christmas after all." Maura kissed the top of Morgan's head and stood up from the bed, straightening her skirt and trying to get a few wrinkles out of her blouse using her hands. She looked at the short girl on the other side and saw her nervously looking in the mirror on the wall, stroking her hair and tucking it behind her ear before pulling it back again. "You look beautiful, Morgan."

"My eyes are red." Morgan wiped her eyes again, effectively smearing the mascara that was still on her face.

Maura shook her head. "Come here, let's get you fixed up then." She took Morgan towards the bathroom, cleaned off her make-up, handed her a cold wash cloth to dap her eyes and they took a few deep breaths together before going back downstairs where the family was waiting.

The kitchen smelled like delicious food and the sound of happy chatter sounded through the house. Maura loved Christmas. The loud Rizzoli family exhausted her sometimes but she wouldn't have it any other way. She would never stop being grateful for this loving family she stepped into by marrying Jane. The way Tommy playfully fought with everyone, the way Frankie looked after every single one of his family and always went out of his way to help in any way he could, the way Angela held everyone together with her loving warmth, that little TJ-boy that would always be special for all of them… The Rizzoli's were a part of Maura's life and Maura loved every single one of them.

Morgan hesitated before entering the living room, slightly stunned by the loud family. Maura stood behind her and placed her hands on her shoulders. "Go on, baby," she whispered. "They all love you just as much as we do."

"Really?"

"Absolutely."

Morgan smiled slightly and straightened her back before slowly walking into the room. Angela looked up at Maura and Maura smiled at her, nodding her head at Morgan as to silently tell her the girl was quite upset. Angela looked at Morgan and squeezed her arm as she passed her. "Morgan," she gently pulled the girl next to her to sit on the armrest of the couch, "I wanted to show you earlier but you were upstairs," she moved her hand on the girl's upper leg. "You see this ring?"

"Yeah, it's pretty." Morgan nodded.

"Thank you." Angela chuckled and looked up at Maura behind her, smiling sweetly.

"You know what it means?" Maura stood next to Morgan, looking at her mother-in-law's hand. "It has a diamond for every grandchild."

"Really?" Morgan looked closer at the ring. "It's pretty."

"I just got it back, actually."

"From where?"

"The jewelry store. They put two more stones in."

Morgan furrowed her brow. "Why?"

"Well, I have to new granddaughters, don't I?" Angela looked at the young girl and stroked her cheek with the back of her hand. "Seems only fitting."

Morgan's eyes went wide for a second before she smiled a grateful smile. She looked up at her sister who sat on the floor with her legs crossed, looking at them on the couch. "Cool, huh?" Rachel said with a smirk. "We're in Grandma's ring."

Maura heard a quiet gasp from Angela when Rachel called her Grandma for the first time. The moment passed when Morgan giggled. "Let's hope you don't get too much grandkids then! Otherwise your ring will be full."

"I'll get another one. And another one after that." Angela chuckled and looked up at Frankie on the other side of the couch. "I'm still waiting on you, Frankie!"

"On what?" Frankie furrowed his brow but groaned when he realized what his mother was talking about. "Kids? C'mon, Ma!"

"What? Even Jane tied the knot before you did!"

"Yeah, Frankie!" Tommy pitched in. "Jane's got four already, you gotta catch up brother!"

"Shut up." Frankie threw a pillow towards his brother and missed his head, hitting the wall behind him.

"Who would've thought that our big sis would be the first with a house full of kids?" Tommy smirked and lifted his beer. "All girls, for God's sake!"

"You're just jealous." Jane shot an angry look towards her brother and stood up from her seat to refill her drink. "Have you seen my girls?"

"Yeah yeah, they're pretty." Tommy shook his head.

"Pretty?" Jane walked past Anna and gently stroked her cheek. "Look at this face!"

"Ma…" Anna blushed and averted her gaze in embarrassment.

Maura laughed at the playful fight and followed her wife towards the kitchen, smiling lovingly when she reached her. "Hi," she whispered while she wrapped her arms loosely around her neck.

"Hi." Jane's playful smirk turned into a loving smile and she leaned forward to capture Maura's lips in a sweet kiss. "How's Morgan?"

"She's okay, I think. She talked about Craig, which is good."

"Hm. And you?"

"What do you mean?" 

"Are you okay?"

Maura moved her arm to wrap it around her wife's waist and looked at her family in the kitchen, seeing Morgan and Angela talking, Rachel getting into a playful argument with Frankie and Tommy, Lily playing a game with TJ and Anna watching them all with a smile on her face as she sat next to Korsak. Maura smiled lovingly and rested her head on her wife's shoulder. "I'm fine."

Jane cupped her wife's cheek and lifted her head, smiling that loving smile that made Maura's stomach do flips. She pressed her lips against her wife's for a loving kiss that lingered a little longer than expected. Maura hummed contently and looked into her detective's dark eyes, getting lost in the depth of them for a short moment. "I love you," she whispered quietly. "So much."

"I love you too, Maur," Jane wrapped her arms around her wife's waist and pressed her lips against her forehead. "I love you and our four kids."

"Don't listen to those crazy brothers of yours," she whispered. "They're just jealous of our beautiful girls."

"I know." Jane moved herself to rest against Maura's side to look at the family in the living room. "I'm so proud of them," she whispered. "I'm proud to be their mother, y'know? Because they're so strong and resilient and smart… All in their own way…"

Maura smiled at her wife so lost in thought, a loving sparkle in her dark eyes. "Our daughters."

"Maybe we should get a boy, just to even things out." Jane smirked. "We need balance." 

"God, four kids is quite enough!"

"Imagine a cute little boy in our family!"

Maura shook her head and tightened her arm around her wife's waist. "No. I can barely handle the kids we have now."

"Yeah. We'll just have to wait until Rachel, Anna and Morgan get to college."

"Stop it," Maura chuckled and pinched Jane's side. "I want to keep my girls in the house a little longer, please." She looked up at her wife and cupped her cheek to turn her head. "Kiss," she whispered with a smile.

Jane kissed her wife with love and passion, wrapping her up in a tight hug as she deepened the kiss and Maura tangled her hands in her wife's messy curls. When they broke apart, gasping for air, Maura smiled a bright smile and stroked her thumbs across Jane's cheekbones, looking into the eyes of the woman she loved wholeheartedly and unconditionally. With her by her side, she knew they could conquer anything. Heartbreak, grief, arguments, all the bumps that would come up during the road, they could conquer it together. "Merry Christmas, my love," she whispered.

Jane smiled and rested her forehead against her wife's, looking into her eyes with love and care. "Merry Christmas."

 _A/N This is the last chapter of this part! Don't worry, the sequel will be up soon. I have a few more ideas for this family and if you have ideas too, don't hesitate to let me know! I don't know the title of the next part yet but it will be uploaded soon so just keep an eye out for it. It would mean a lot to me if you'd follow me there, your support has been overwhelming and heartwarming. Thank you all so, so much for your follows and reviews! Know that I read every single one of them and they all make me happy. THANK YOU!_


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